Saturday, August 04, 2007
So I saw the doctor and she ran a bunch of tests and told me that I have vascularization in my tumors (which is never a good sign), and it needs to come out. I also have to repeat my trendox (sp?) breathing test before my surgery so they are coming to set the machine up next wed which means I need to clean my house! UGH! Then the nurse called and said I have Graves Disease, which doesn't bother me too much since the thyroid is coming out anyways, except that it's an autoimmune disorder, and those tend to run in my family. UGH!
I'm starting to get some of my spirit back I think though. I'm trying to get the house in shape before I have surgery so that I don't have to think about it too much for those first few weeks. Went and spent $100 on groceries/toiletries. Trying to get some things nailed down. If we could just sell the car I'd feel alot better. Does anyone need a car? LOL
I guess life isn't all bad, just a bit stressful. My doctor also mentioned that she'd like me to think of having lap band surgery when I'm healed. She says that since everything except my arthritis is still doing well (once my thyroid is out) that now we should try and get some weight off to keep me healthy. Even 50 lbs would do a huge improvement for my physical well-being. I told her that I've been thinking about it for some time, but I'll have to see if my insurance covers it. If they do, now's the time to have it done because I will have met my out-of-pocket with this surgery so it would basically be covered 100%.
Ok, I'll stop blabbering and sign off...
Sunday, July 29, 2007
UGH, after I just thought my hormones were finally smoothing out from my last surgeries, I get news of another one. This feels like a real kick in the pants because I wasn't expecting it, and I am totally upset by it. I'm still varying between emotional outbursts and angry retorts - very moody. But that's usually common for me for a couple of days when these things happen, it will subside.
I just don't know if I can handle it, I'm tired of being cut on. But I have no choice, because eventually I will suffocate if I dont' have the tumors removed. I just got my last incision healed enough that it's not very noticible, I felt like a freak for about 6 months afterwards last time. Plus, it is a painful surgery because everything you do makes your neck move. UGH, I'm just emotionally exhausted. I really feel like eating myself into oblivion, but I'm managing to keep from doing that so far. TV helps me forget about things for a while, but it doesn' help me get my stuff done around the house.
Well, maybe a good night's sleep will help my mood.
Friday, July 27, 2007
Sometimes I feel like throwing in the towel on this one. I weighed in on monday and I had gained like 6 lbs in 4 days. I weighed last night and I had gained 3 more! I weighed this morning (I'm trying to keep track of fluid retetion b/c I see the doc on monday) and I lost 5, wierd!?! The only thing I can think of is that I've upped my water intake and reduced my caloric intake and started exercising more, so maybe my body's on standby waiting to see what happens next. But, it's really discouraging! GRRRRR.... I also had a bloodsugar incident sneak up on me during kickboxing last night so I didn't get a very good workout :(
Ok, I'm done feeling sorry for myself, I'm going to have to get over it. On the positives, I got workout mats, and an iced tea maker, and a 20 pt spin on the wheel this morning :)
Have a blessed day everyone!
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Phew...Long day! DD and DH have both been in Taekwondo for about a year, and there is a special right now that another family member can get a free uniform and 4 weeks trial for free. So, guess who they dragged in to try it out. It's easier than the kickboxing (which is at the same school) but I have to think more...LOL. So, I had 40 min of TKD, mowed the lawn for 20, and did a miracle mile for 25 minutes. That's alot of exercise for me these days! I feel pretty good right now, but we'll see how I feel in the morning, hopefully I won't stove up too much. My back was killing me when I got up this AM from kickboxing last night...UGH. Well, we'll see how tomorrow goes :)
Friday, July 20, 2007
My computer is misbehaving again, so I haven't had much time online. It's also been HOT here! UGH. But, I've been continuing to go to kickboxing twice a week, and we got some mats so I should be able to start doing it at home now. It's much nicer to exercise in the air conditioning! My arthritis is still bothering me alot after classes, but I guess a little pain is a good trade-off if it gets some weight off. If I don't drop some lbs my arthritis will continue to get worse as I age. Oh well...off to get my new Harry Potter book! YAY!
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