Friday, September 23, 2011
So I need to vent. I have been upset about something for a week now. Well, ok I will be honest for the last day I had stopped thinking about it and seeing my best friend at work today reminded me.
Last Saturday my family (me, hubs and 3 kids) and my best friends family(her boyfriend, herself, their baby) went to dinner after traveling out of town to a football game for my senior. Her boyfriend had heard of this diner and since we were in that town we decided to try it. We seated ourselves, it was full of people and we went to a patio area. The waitress took our order and the food came via a different server. So far, so good right? Well, she never came back. There was a huge window overlooking the patio and everyone kept staring at us. I thought...hmmm maybe because they are all over 50 and we are not? I know that sounds rude but I was searching...they were staring so much my husband commented on it. When the other server brought our food I asked politely for refills. She replied "I'll tell your waitress" and left. Twenty minutes later I tracked down the waitress (who had 2 tables on the patio and had been in and out, brought them refills, now they bill and we were there first. I politely asked "ma'm when you get a chance could you bring us some refills?" no comment. Noone came. I tracked the other server down..."hi, we're still waiting for refills...we're ready for the bill too but would like the refills still" She replied "what were you drinking" I answered. "what about the others?" "Not sure" She came to the table about 15 minutes laster with refills...she never did ask what the others were drinking. I was shocked. I have never been treated in such a way. We did nothing wrong, we spent over $100 dollars there. The food was yummy, but the service ruined it. The waitress, mid fifties or so, returned finally 90 minutes later -remember she had been within 4 ft of us off and on the entire time waiting on others- with the bill. She asked if we needed anything and I replied "no thanks we are done now". Polite to the end. I did not leave a tip...I wrote on the tip line "noone would wait on us?". I have never stiffed a waitress, I have waited tables myself. I tip 20%, 10% if you are totally lousy but this was inexcusable. One thing nice was that the waitress was so sweet to my five yr old, lavishing her with comments the TWO times she was there (taking order, bringing bill). I thought about this for days...and it finally came to me. You see, the waitress didnt talk to my goddaughter. She's 3 and usually trumps a five yr old in cuteness factor, lol. She has long pigtails and can speak like Einstein. They sat side by side, the kids at one table...adults at the one next to it. You see, here it dawned on me. I've been blind, fortunate to not experience this side of human nature before. You see, my goddaughter is biracial. Her ponytails are dark and curly. Her father, my best friends boyfriend, is black. Those people were not staring at us because of our age. We were the youngest...but I am convinced that this was not the issue.
It's easy to dismiss anger about slavery, I believe it was very wrong...but I am not responsible for the past. However, how can we expect people to let something go when they are still experiencing mistreatment for the color of their skin?? What is the matter with this world???
Whether you dont like a person because of their race, sexual preference, religion, etc it is still wrong. Everyone person is an individual. This one is saddened by the realization that such ignorance still exists.
I know this will probably offend some but I needed to vent. This site is where I have always felt safe to express myself. Dont get me wrong, I knew this existed on some plane...I've discussed it. I just have never before experienced it firsthand, I guess thats cuz I'm white.
My daughter sees my best friends daughter as her friend. I'm thankful for that.