CORTNEY-LEE   50,429
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CORTNEY-LEE's Recent Blog Entries

No, seriously - I am too old for this $%&@

Monday, July 15, 2013

I am 33 years old. I should NOT have to worry about my face, back and chest breaking out like a flipping teenager. Seriously! I went through this enough. I should get a reprieve!

When I was in 4th grade, my skin started breaking out. I remember laying in bed one night touching my forehead and feeling all of these bumps. I ran out into the living room crying because I didn't know what they were. My mom took a look and knew that it was the start of acne. Lucky for me (or unlucky depending on how you look at it) my Mom also had bad skin, so she had some cream on hand that her dermatologist had given her. She carefully rubbed some on my new "bumps" and sent me back to bed. The next day she made an appointment for me.

The dermatologist she took me to, Dr. Dunn, was not in our insurance network, but she wouldn't take me to anyone else. She paid out of pocket for me to see him. I loved Dr. Dunn. He was fantastic! He was kind and gentle and talked on a level that a 4th grade girl could understand.

He gave me some creams to try, and showed me how to properly wash my face. Over the next few years, my acne got worse and spread to my back, shoulders and chest. He gave me creams and antibiotics to take.

Kids are cruel...
1. I had acne
2. I had braces
3. I was over weight
4. I had glasses
5. I was smart

So, I had EVERY strike a kid could have against them except I wasn't totally poor and had nice clothes. We weren't rich by any means, in fact we were one step above poor. Thankfully my grandparent made sure I had all of the "in" clothes (Gap, Esprit, Benneton, Levis, Guess) so at least I didn't get picked on for that! Everything else well... yeah, kids suck.

So after a few years of being made fun of and being called "pizza face" my complexion started clearing up. The worst of it was over and done with by 9th grade.

So here I am... almost 20 years later, and I am still struggling with break outs.

Anyway - I made a fabulous dinner tonight. Talapia w/ pineapple mango salsa and spaghetti squash. It was a delightful dinner. It was very colorful and very light. It was hot and icky out today, and a light dinner like that was perfect. I really wanted zucchini, but the store was sold out, so I opted for a spaghetti squash.

PC Fit was really hard tonight, but it was a good workout. I am dreading taking the time off to allow my tattoo to heal. I am hoping I will be ok after a week? I mean, there are other things I can do. I guess we will have to wait and see how scabbed over I am after it is done. I am just afraid that I will get out of the "groove" and lose my momentum. Then again, knowing how much I love it... maybe that won't happen? I guess the only thing I can do is wait and see. I won't put off getting my tattoo because I REALLY want this covered up! I guess it is no different then when I had to take a few weeks off from meeting with Olivia - when it was time to meet up again, I got right back into the swing of things.

Tomorrow is the summer reading party at the Library. I think it will be a lot of kids... eating cupcakes and sugar and being hyper... but I think it will be a good time. I hope so at least!

Have a great night Spark Friends!

I think that is all for now

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MICHELLE_LEX 7/21/2013 3:09PM

    Oh just you wait until perimenopause hits. It's SUCH a joy! Haha!

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REAGANESQUE 7/16/2013 8:48PM

    Breakouts suck, and I think the hot weather makes it worse. Your dinner sounds awesome! There are definitely some painful childhood memories. ..you must be so proud of the fabulous person you became today!

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KIKKI-G 7/16/2013 11:51AM

    I have never had issues with acne really even in my teens (aside from the odd one) & I have worse skin now than I have EVER had in my life (i'm 29 now). I drink 2L or more of water per day, I eat healthy and wash my face 2x a day. I've been told that it is purely hormonal. We're at the age now that our hormones are changing again & that's just what comes with it. I break out along my jawline, cheeks and forehead and chest with such deep acne that it leaves scars. Its definitely a struggle to keep it under control and I might have clear skin for a week MAX in my cycle. fml. I'm trying too so I feel your frustration.

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SOOTHINGGLOW 7/16/2013 10:01AM

    I totally understand. I have had clear skin for years now but two weeks ago I started breaking out BAD!!!! I'm thinking it has to do with my skin adjusting to the RNY surgery. I started having some hair loss too (as expected). I went and bought some acne cleanser and moisturizer and use twice a day now. It has helped but GEEEZ!!!! Why all of the sudden?

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LOVINGAFRICA 7/16/2013 8:52AM

    It's the hormones. (Wish I knew that as a teenager, I thought it was dirt, and tried to wash more- more sebum)
Your mom is great, BTW
I think all that hardship made you the accepting, supportive person that you are today.


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THROOPER62 7/16/2013 6:11AM

    I am 63 and I still have an occasional break-out on my face. I didn't start til this past year. During the rest of my life I didn't have any pimples. emoticon

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TRACYZABELLE 7/16/2013 1:17AM

    darn hormones! Grrrrrrrrrrr

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LAGUNAMAMA 7/16/2013 12:13AM

    It's so unfair, isn't it? I swear, I was NOT told that I'd be in my 30's and still breaking out. My acne was always having like one big pimple, as soon as that one would leave, another would arise in a different spot. Ugh. The only thing better about acne as an adult is that you ALSO aren't a self-esteem-less teenager, it's easier to be confident as an adult.

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COCK-ROBIN 7/16/2013 12:12AM

    May it go great for you.

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CHERIJ16 7/15/2013 11:50PM

    I am 65 and I still get breakouts on my chin! I never had acne as a teenager but here I am as a golden oldie with breakouts! Go figure. emoticon

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Something we all need to remember (photos)

Sunday, July 14, 2013


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1MIN17SECB412PM 8/3/2013 7:10PM

    I am sooo in emoticon with the HP scales!!

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HINK2013 7/15/2013 12:11PM

    AGREED!!! It's only a number.... emoticon

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HEATER1369 7/15/2013 10:52AM

    Those are awesome and I think all scales should have a positive saying on them to encourage people not only to succeed but to live beyond what number the scale says.

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PATTYR81 7/15/2013 9:47AM

    emoticon

Funny, I never even thought to 'decorate' my scale!
Especially with words of encouragement!

I LOVE This!!!

Comment edited on: 7/15/2013 9:48:19 AM

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LOVINGAFRICA 7/15/2013 8:23AM

    Good Blog, Girlfriend!

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JUST_BRENDA 7/15/2013 7:01AM

    no kidding!!!
emoticon

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STEPH-KNEE 7/15/2013 12:26AM

    So true! I put stickers on my scale that say "ur awesome" and "this means nothing" with an arrow pointed towards the number to remind me it isn't all about the scale. We are so much more than that! emoticon

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BRADMILL2922 7/14/2013 11:51PM

    Excellent things to remember!

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MARYANNB25 7/14/2013 11:29PM

    emoticon

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Happy Sunday Sparkies!

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Happy Sunday everyone!

I didn't get enough sleep last night, but that is ok. I think I will go to bed early tonight. I have PC Fit at 10:00 - then I will volunteer at the Library starting at 12:00 for the rest of the day.

I am working from 7-7 today.

Stupid McDonalds didn't put sugar free syrup in my coffee. I am pretty sure I just experienced a mild form of dumping syndrome. I have never had that before. It wasn't fun. I feel fine now. Not a fun thing to have happen at work.

I made a delicious overnight oatmeal for breakfast today. Pumpkin Pie flavored.
1/4 cup old fashioned oatmeal
1/4 cup of 0% Greek Yogurt
1/4 cup pumpkin
1 tsp flax seed
1/3 cup unsweetened vanilla almond milk
1 tsp pumpkin pie spice
1 packet of truvia
20 raisins (yes, I count out 20 raisins)

It is very yummy and filling. My co-worker brought in McDonald's breakfast sandwiches for everyone. I was thinking about it, but then I decided against it and just ate what I brought.

I made an Apple Pie Angelfood Cake to share for the weekend. It is a very simple recipe, and that stats aren't overly horrible.

1 One Step Angelfood cake mix
1 can of light pie filling (sugar free)
-- you can use any flavor but to make apple pie flavor, you use apple --

mix it together and bake at 350 for about half an hour

I eat pretty clean.. most of the time, but i like a little junk now and then. This is a good cake for that.

They loved it. It is almost gone.

Everyone has a great day!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IM2READY 7/14/2013 6:50PM

    I found a sugar free strawberry flavored angel food cake at Walmart. Very good. Thanks for sharing your recipes, I will definitely give them a try.

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SADIEMAE32 7/14/2013 12:21PM

    emoticon for snubbing the McDonalds breakfast sandwiches!!

Comment edited on: 7/14/2013 12:21:46 PM

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PATTYR81 7/14/2013 11:42AM

    emoticon

I'm gonna try both recipes!!!!


Ya- dumping is a DRAG! I HATE that!!!!

I'm glad you're feeling better!

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LOVINGAFRICA 7/14/2013 10:27AM

    Sorry you dumped! I really hate that.
Enjoy your day too!


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BRADMILL2922 7/14/2013 10:11AM

    I am going to have to try that cake! I make angel food with pineapple quite often but the apple sounds great! So does the oatmeal!

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COCK-ROBIN 7/14/2013 10:04AM

    Wonderful!

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GODDREAMDIVA1 7/14/2013 10:01AM

    emoticon

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ELRIDDICK 7/14/2013 9:42AM

  Thanks for sharing

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Not as Planned

Saturday, July 13, 2013

The weather did not favor the perfect summer day I had planned for yesterday.

First, I woke up for PC Fit and couldn't get out of bed (Thank you Coach Tony)

Second, we couldn't go to the lake because it barely broke 70 and was too cold for swimming.

I did get to make my steak dinner, and it was fantastic. We also went for ice cream, and took the scooter. It was a good time.

I am working today and tomorrow - should be a good time

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COCK-ROBIN 7/13/2013 10:29PM

    You're doing great!

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KNITTY_JESS 7/13/2013 9:52PM

    You still got up and did things. Be proud of the little steps.

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PATTYR81 7/13/2013 1:12PM

    emoticon

YUM!! emoticon

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BRADMILL2922 7/13/2013 11:47AM

    Too bad the weather didn't cooperate. Hope you have a great weekend!

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LOVINGAFRICA 7/13/2013 10:43AM

    Still fun!

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SLACHETKA103145 7/13/2013 9:28AM

    Always remember, if it wasn't for rainy days, how would we ever feel the power of the sun.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Would love to hear from you!
Jean

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Disconnected

Thursday, July 11, 2013

I hung out with my friend Paul yesterday, and I did not feel the connection that I used to.

I couldn't put my finger on it until I was talking with a friend about it and she said "maybe it is because you don't do drugs together anymore"

She hit the nail on the head. Our friendship was based on our mutual desire to get wasted. A typical Cortney and Paul night was to take a few vicodin, xanax and somas that were washed down with jack daniels and coke. On the way to wherever we were going (bar or bonfire at someone's house) we would smoke a joint. Once we were at the destination we would smoke more pot and drink more.

I am not proud of this. I am lucky I am not dead. It was stupid, reckless, and asinine behavior, but I didn't think about that. I only cared about getting wasted on whatever I could to fill the void in my life that was missing.

When I met my boyfriend, that void was filled, and I stopped doing all of it, except maybe a drink or two on occasion. Paul didn't stop and he still leads the same life that we did 5 years ago.

Before we could even go anywhere, he had to go to his brother's house to get high. They offered me, and I declined. I don't have any interest in it anymore. It isn't my thing. I would rather get my high at the gym.

Don't get me wrong, I still love Paul and he is still very dear to me, but I just don't feel that connection that I used to. We used to sit in my old Jeep in the middle of the woods, smoke pot and listen to music until the sun came up. *sigh*

Anyway, Coach Tony killed me at PC Fit tonight! I don't even know what to say! It was awesome! I did the best that I could. THAT girl was in my class tonight - you know which one I am talking about... the pretty blonde, tan one with big boobs and a perfect everything? The girl who goes through the workout flawlessly and doesn't break a sweat? Yup... she was in my class tonight... Next to her I feel like an out of shape cow... but pretty soon, next to me, she is going to feel like one! Ok, maybe not, but I can hope? She is actually really nice.

I have a perfect summer day planned for tomorrow.
PC Fit
Spend the day at the lake
Steaks for dinner
go out for an ice cream cone

I hope everyone has a good night!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KNITTY_JESS 7/13/2013 9:55PM

    Making that change in your life is amazing. I'm proud for you.

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KO1215 7/12/2013 3:02PM

    Great story!

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LOVINGAFRICA 7/12/2013 2:37AM

    You are a true champion, in every way. Very few people get to just walk away from all that while keeping the people who remain on that road in their lives.
You are living your life beautifully, my Friend. I am proud to know you.

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COCK-ROBIN 7/12/2013 1:01AM

    Wonderful!

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NYARAMULA 7/12/2013 12:29AM

    Congratulations on turning your life around. You are a true inspiration.

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BRADMILL2922 7/11/2013 11:59PM

    Sounds like you have a great day planned tomorrow! Enjoy it! That is really great that you gave up all that old behavior as well. I know that is hard to do but it sounds like you have done it. Good for you. Maybe if your friend fills his void in the future, you guys can have a different connection in future meetings. Have fun tomorrow!

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MARYANNB25 7/11/2013 10:01PM

    Sounds like a great day.

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DSCROW 7/11/2013 9:58PM

    It sounds like a great plan for a great day! I am processing my yesterdays recently myself. I think its part of the way we make even better tomorrows.

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