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Re-Thinking the idea of "full"

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

I have a lot of things that I want to talk about.

1. Re-Thinking the idea of "full"
-- I was wondering why every time I eat, I think I have to stuff myself to the point I feel sick?What does "full" really mean? Today I had a ham sandwich and some fruit for lunch. After I ate it, I wasn't hungry anymore, but it didn't seem like I was "full" either. I felt like i needed to eat more in order to achieve that stuffed feeling. I drank some more water, and left for work, and I felt fine for a while then I started to feel hungry again. So I ate a banana, and that seemed to take the edge off of my hunger for a while.

I am wondering if this all isn't in my head, and that I am not really hungry at all, but think that I am. Like right now, I know I am not hungry, but I know that I have calories left for today so I am thinking that I need to eat them, and I don't. Why eat when I am not hungry just because I haven't met my calories goals for the day? My goal is between 1500-1700 and right now, I am at about 1300, maybe a little more.

-- Vacation was awesome. I didn't really do that much, but it was sooo relaxing and enjoying! Sunday was the most awesome day. I woke up around 6:30 am and took a walk. It was awesome to be out walking at that time of the morning. I wish that was something I could do all of the time. It was still nice and cool out, and I was enjoying the sounds of nature. My boyfriend and I took the scooter out and about and went for a very long ride. We were gone almost six hours! We started out at home and went to Bedford, PA - then to Somerset, PA then Grantsville, MD to Oakland, MD to Luke, MD, to Cumberland, MD then back up to Bedford and home!

After we got home, we got cleaned up and went out to dinner. It was Olive Garden Sunday! I had the Linguine Marinara. It was totally yummy! I also had 2 servings of salad, and 2 1/2 breadsticks. I saved calories tho, and actually had about 1300 that I was able to blow. I know that isn't the healthiest thing to do, but I only do it once a month. Every other time I spread my calories out for the day, but this meal was totally worth saving for!

3. my new work out video

it totally kicked my butt! I made it through the first 2 miles today and WOW - it was awesome! I love Richard Simmons, but have not been doing my Disco Sweat because I found the Leslie Sansone stuff. I actually had one of VHS from forever ago (I don't even think you can buy it now) and started doing it, then I bought this one, and today was my first day. I got a much better workout because unlike with my Richard videos, I wasn't always worrying about which way I was going or falling and hurting myself. These are defiantly the best ones for those of us who have a total lack of coordination!

4. July 16, 2010 was my 365th day without a cigarette.

-- I don't know what else to say about that. I am just damn proud of myself!



Monday, July 12, 2010

Goals are important. I have some pretty serious ones, and I have some silly ones. My overall goal is to improve the quality of my life. I am about 3/4 of the way there on the major goals.

1. Quit Smoking (7/16/10 will be my 365th day without smoking)

2. Maintain a "healthy" relationship with a member of the opposite sex (D and I will be together 2 years in Sept. He is the greatest guy in the world)

3. Pay off all of my debt (should be done 12/10 - maybe 11/10)

4. Lose weight. (I would like to lose at least 100 pounds. Right now, I am shooting for 50 by the end of the year)

Then I have all of these silly little goals, that pretty much come along with the weight loss. I want to be able to buy this super cute Pittsburgh Penguins shirt. It only goes as big as an XL in ladies, and I can't wear that now. I want to be able to buy one of those nifty bras from Victoria's Secret that enhances TWO cup sizes (cause as the pounds go down, so do the DDs)

I have decided I am not going to weight myself until next Monday. The numbers had better go down. I am working, and working pretty hard. I do the 2 mile walk video, and for the last "1/2 mile" I jog in place. I just can't stand to be outside in this weather. Anything over 60 degrees is to hot for me. Plus... I ran into a slight "problem" with my walking route at my house. See... There is a man that live about a 1/2 mile from my house... he weighs 675+ pounds and lives on his front porch (they closed it in using that board insulation) and he has a hole cut in it to serve as a "window" or something along those lines. The smell coming from the place is disgusting. I don't know what else to say, other than that. It is disgusting. To make matters worse, he stares out this little "window" at me, and I heard from his neighbors that he lays on his mattress naked and only throws a sheet over him when someone comes over. I feel bad. The trailer he lives in has no running water, and he shares it with his Dad and Wife. It is a very sad situation, however, no matter how sad, it makes me feel very ill to walk by there. So my alternate route is pretty much along the road surrounded by woods on both sides and no houses, which isn't exactly... thrilling either. I digress..

I am doing the tape, and very soon I will start Richard Simmons Tone and Sweat. I was looking at the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred, but I don't know what is involved with it, and I think it might have to be something I have to wait on until I am at a better fitness level. I wish I could go swimming, that would make me happy! Sadly, my Aunt's new pool liner hasn't come yet, and the public pool... well... lets say I am not a fan. I like the idea of working out in my house. It is cool - and even though I have very limited space at my boyfriend's house, I can still do the walking DVD. That is nice.

I will be on vacation the rest of the week until monday, so I am REALLY looking forward to that. It is going to be awesome! Yay!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

-POOKIE- 7/13/2010 1:36PM

    Sounds like a plan!

Buying clothes is great fun!

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ABSOLUTZER0 7/13/2010 10:58AM

    You are certainly improving your quality of life! THIS IS AWESOME!!! I commend you for taking control and not just talking about it, but doing something about it! Continue to strive to reach those goals!

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Sunday, July 11, 2010

That is my new word. Suck-tastic. I needed something to describe how this day was going, and I thought Suck-tastic pretty much described it.

Last night my boyfriend took me out for dinner. We went to Inlow's. It is a quaint little Mom and Pop hot dog stand. I got a 12" hot dog w/ chilli, cheese and onion, french fries and cole slaw. The good news is... I don't really like french fries, and these ones we a little undercooked, so I only ate 3 or 4 of them. Now, I ate the cole slaw and the hot dog, and we split an order of cheese sticks... oh, then he took me for an ice cream cone. I got a small soft serve. Butter Pecan... but it didn't really taste like Butter Pecan... it was still good. My only saving grace on the entire meal was that I knew I was going to totally blow it, so I ate very light for the day... veggies, fruit and raisin bran for breakfast. I guess that doesn't totally excuse it. I gotta say tho, it was very tasty.

I have been doing a new exercise video. Leslie Sandsone Walking Away the Pounds. I do the entire 2 miles. It has just been so hot out, and I despise this weather soooo much... I feel like I get an ok workout, and something has to be better than nothing?

I am really looking forward to some vacation time

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ABSOLUTZER0 7/12/2010 7:23PM

    At least you prepared for the day. Sometimes you have to do that, so you don't go crazy and unleash the beast everyday. Continue to create healthy habits!

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-POOKIE- 7/12/2010 5:03AM

    Something to make an effort is always better than nothing xx

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Thursday, July 08, 2010

I got Subway tonight
12 inch Chicken breast on white
- lettuce, tomato, onion, honey mustard
1 bag of baked lays bbq chips

It tasted awesome! Then after I ate it, I didn't feel so good. I don't know why, but I felt super sick. I ended up throwing up (not on purpose!) and then I felt fine. I think I might have ate to much to fast or something? At any rate, it was delish, and I will be getting it again, but I think next time, I will get a 6 inch.

Still hot and crappy outside. I feel bloated and nasty because of it. I hate this weather. I can't wait until it snows! Yay! I love the cold.

My boyfriend left for work tonight, so he will be gone until Friday. Tomorrow and Friday I plan on Disco Sweat since I will be at my house. I am getting together with my friend Katie tomorrow and I am making us this most awesome desert I got from Weight Watchers eons ago (circa 1995) and we are going to have dinner, and some desert and chill out. I want to go to Wegman's grocery store too. They always have a lot of stuff I can't find anywhere else. I read about this stuff called Better Than Peanut Butter, and I want to give it a try. I have heard it is really good, and I have heard it is nasty. I would like to give it a try though.

Sometimes I feel like I am not doing enough. I love Lean Pockets. I eat one almost every day for lunch, usually with a piece of fruit. A girl I work with today told me that I shouldn't eat them. When I asked why, she said the sodium. Ok, I get that sodium isn't that great for you, but neither is the hormones and antibiotics that are used in meat and milk production? I was actually a vegetarian for a pretty long time. Well, I am losing, so I will continue to enjoy my lean pocket.

Right now, I could use some major sleepy time

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ABSOLUTZER0 7/8/2010 1:25PM

    Enjoy the Disco Sweat and your desert tomorrow! I have not eaten a hot or lean pocket in years. I used to survive on them my first two years of college. Heh! They are high in sodium and you are right about the hormones i meat and milk production. I think the best thing to do is be aware of what you are taking in and make adjustments as time goes on. I think having one a day is not terribly bad. You could do a lot worse you know.

After reading your post, I wondered about them myself, so I had to go and find something about them. Check it out...

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Total Office Space Moment...

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

So, I flipped out on the copy machine at work today. It kept getting jammed, and I was already at maximum stress level, and that just set me off. I am sure I looked like a total dork kicking the copy machine (in open toed heels) and cursing at it. The only thing I could think after I stormed out of the room and threw the papers on my supervisor's desk and said "You do it!"
is that famous line from Office Space "PC Loadletter? What the f@$% does that mean?" I then started laughing to myself.

So, I am obsessing over Subway - I was craving it so bad tonight, that I almost went and got a sub (even after I ate my dinner!) but I distracted myself, and did some research. I am going to eat light tomorrow, and save up some calories so that I can "splurge" in a Roasted Chicken Sub w/ lettuce, tomato, onion and honey mustard dressing. I factored in how much it plus a bag of baked chips would be, so I will keep it to a light lunch, and light snack so that I may indulge in it.

I didn't go for a walk today. It was to hot out. It was hotter than yesterday, and the humidity was even worse. I walked outside, and it felt like I was walking into a blast furnace. Holy crow! When I am at my boyfriend's my only option for exercise is to walk because there is no where for me to do any thing else. I am thinking about hooking up my old TV/VCR combo in the garage, but it is just as hot in there as outside if not worse.

Next week, I am on vacation


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OREOSMILE 7/7/2010 3:02PM

    Great job at hanging on through a temptation on a stressful day and figuring out how to work in the craving legally!


I hope that the heat breaks for you soon. Is there an air conditioned mall around that you could do some mall walking in if it's too hot outside?


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