Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Tonight I made a decision about the Superbowl.
Before I tell you the decision let me give you some background information.
I love Professional Football. I am a huge Fan. Lots of women are fans of football. They watch with their husbands/boyfriends and enjoy the game.
I am not that kind of female fan.
My husband is not a big fan of football. He watches the games with ME. I have watched football as an independent fan for as long as I can remember. In fact I can not remember a time that I did not watch football. I am a full fledged Green Bay Packer/ Vince Lombardi/Bart Starr/Reggie White/Brett Favre/Aaron Rogers Fan. I watch the drafts, follow training season, watch pre-season, every game on every Sunday and on weeks they dent play, I watch other teams. Yes I love the game, admire some players but love the game.
My sister was the same way. Janie is no longer with us due to Breast Cancer but she was a fan in her own right and her Team was The San Francisco 49'ers.
If Greenbay and San Fran played, she and I would call each other pre-game, half time and post game. It is who we were.
Greenbay will not be going to the Superbowl, but San Fransisco will.
In honor of my sister I will cheer for the 49'ers.
Janie's husband sent me a message after the 49'ers won their way to the Superbowl and said, Can you imagine the party your sister would be throwing on Superbowl Sunday?
Yes I can imagine it because my sister was a wonder cook. I cook pretty good but Janie was a culinary genius. My little sister specialized in Asian Food, but she could cook anything and it would be fantastic. I compare her to an artist. She could draw spices and flavors together better than any 4 star restaurant you could enjoy.
So here is my decision.
I do not like denial. I believe it is one reason my weight loss goals have failed in the past.
I want to enjoy food and I want to enjoy life. And it is true I need to enjoy it less. But I do not like fat free anything. or low cal anything and to me eating those things is not living.
I can handle skim milk and that is about as far as I will go. I do not think that peanut butter on a celery stalk is a treat. (I read the article on this site that claimed it was).
If I need to eat a smaller portion and love it, I can do that rather than eat a lot of something I just simply do not enjoy. It is the quality with me and not always the quantity.
so on Superbowl Sunday I will eat the same stuff and actually in the same quantity that I normally do.
and the ultimate decision is this, from Thursday to Sunday I will walk one extra hour on the treadmill every day in preparation for the day. That is 4 hours of extra exercise in order to still stay on the journey I am on, but enjoy my day... my way.
If I am going to truly learn how to manage my intake, I see no other way. And waking up on Monday with post diet disaster guilt is not how I want next week to start.
I will do the time... to do the crime.
Now I have a plan and I can get ready for game day, stress free and happy that preparing beforehand, will allow me to watch the game, the commercials and the giving of the Vince Lombardi Trophy, without worrying about what I am doing food wise.
Enjoy the Game!
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Did I tell you I was trying to lose weight?
I am immersed.
I bet there are some people who can get up, figure out their meals for the day, check their spark page, schedule their exercise and move on with a normal day.
That person is not THIS person.
I am Obsessed.
I have to be.
It's who I am.
When I begin something like losing weight, I take it on, all of it. Recipes, Calorie Counters, Labels, Exercise Equipment, the whole nine yards.
It stays on my mind all day, everyday, I have never learned how to calm down and just do whatever program I am doing. If I am going to exercise, I will do it every day, think about it all day, and wonder if I should do more at the end of the day. My full attention will be on it.
It's not all I talk about, thankfully, but it is what I think about.
While I have never investigated if I have an obsessive disorder, I am pretty sure I do and I saw that same trait in my dad growing up. My husband says, "well you didn't get it from a stranger". He's right. My dad did whatever the new thing was...until it was overdone, and he exhausted by it.
I am trying my best not to follow in his footsteps, but I do find the same things that he enjoyed interesting. When my dad learned to make wine, he made wine all the time. When he learned how to make bean sprouts in a mason jar, he went nuts and made tons of them, and sent all of us ming beans and screens so we could do the same. And the list goes on and on and on.
I am positive that my downfalls on weight loss in the past were due (in part) to this behavior of mine because it actually can be exhausting at some point.
Now is the time for me to try some new behaviors, because I fear that if I don't that when I lose the weight, (and by the way I AM going to lose the weight) I won't know what to do with myself. Learning self control for me, is not just about the calories and the food, its about turning my mind off on whatever I am doing, just enough to still do it, but not obsess over it.
I am going to work on that project today. ALL DAY. LOL
until next time, stay strong, be happy, We CAN do this.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
When we start on this journey of improving our lifestyles and dietary habits, we are usually very motivated to just get going with it. We finally stopped putting it off. We have tried to chart a course for ourselves, at least in the short term. We have kind of an idea of how we are going to do this. We know that there is a lot of information available and especially at SparkPeople, we know we can find answers and motivation to keep us going for a while.
So we start and off we go. We count the calories, we read the articles and we walk on the treadmill or whatever our choice of exercise is when we begin. Then we decide that its time for that second weigh in, the one that will show us in number form that we are indeed "doing it for real this time". A pound, maybe two falls off and again we get that burst of excitement, and motivation. The next week its the same, a pound or two.
By the third or fourth week we are not so motivated, but we are still doing the "best we can". We had a big family celebration that derailed us for a day, followed by another one, We tried out best to "get started again", but we are still wearing pretty much the same size except they are a little looser. After 6 weeks of this, a lot of us, give in to the temptation and just stop working at it. What went wrong? Why has this happened to me? and maybe to you?
I think the reason is we have not learned to go the distance in the learning of it all. What I mean is, If I had reached my goal by now, I would not understand the importance of going the distance and learning how to really have a bad day and get back on track the very next morning not two days or 4 days later. I would not be "seasoned" to the lifestyle changes, I would not understand that I can say yes to Birthday Cake because I know me and tomorrow I will absolutely, positively do an extra 15 minutes on that treadmill. Heck I would just have another piece of that cake!
I want to lose 50 lbs to get to a healthy weight of 135 lbs. Not 125lbs that I rocked as a 20 year old but 135 that I will rock as a 55 year old because that is the healthier choice for me. I will weigh in 2 days and I think that maybe I have lost 20% of that 50 lbs. 10 lbs.
In my mind, spring is around the corner and new clothes. And I want those new clothes, yes I do. But more importantly I want to learn how to live a normal life and have my cake and eat it too and be motivated enough to plan for it, or work it off, Of course I want to see those changes in my weight RIGHT NOW, but patience is teaching me to stay the course. I do not know how long it will take to lose this weight. But I am committed to losing the weight in a sensible time frame and learning as I go, so that I can maintain a new lifestyle and ENJOY the cake, not feel guilty about it, or deny myself it. Enjoy it.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
I started my lifestyle change on 12/31/12. I decided to jump start my New Years Resolution a day early. During the course of 3 weeks I have had my bouts with hunger, not being motivated to exercise, and a family that do not have weight issues and bring a miriad of foods into our house that I should never eat if I am trying to lose weight.
How have I dealt with all these issues?
1. Hunger...I have just been hungry and told myself that hunger is part of it. The worst thing was waking up hungry. I never used to do that. Of course I ate some horrible thing before I went to bed each night...and that is why I need to lose weight. I have spent the better part of 3 weeks trying to find foods that will "fill me up" with low calories. Collard Green Egg White Omelets have become my best friend in the morning. I have added cheese on some days, but not whole "serving" sized. I do the math and maybe use 1/3rd of a serving, get the flavor and not the calories.
2. Motivation. My wii said it best...those muscles are not going to work themselves! On some snowy days I took a walk outside and enjoyed the snow on the evergreens on our farm. On other days I put my headphones on my laptop, place that next to my treadmill and watch Youtube videos and try not to look at the mileage/calorie/time meter. Usually I just turn on the wii, and go along with the wii fit dvd. And then theres Bowling on wii. My husband and I bowl every night on wii and after an hour I track it on my spark tracker. Doing a lot of different things has kept the boredom down. It just takes getting started for me and then I can continue on for the day. Getting started is the hardest part.
3. Cookie and Muffins and Cakes, Oh My! I just basically ignore them. I realize this journey is my own. I can not conform my family to my resolution, and why would I? This is my journey and turning away from a poundcake on the counter is in itself one small victory. If I really wanted it, I would just eat it, and refer back to #2. I thinkI am learning control. Appetite control, portion control, and the power to just walk away from some sweet gooey thing on the counter. All of the goodies my family enjoys are purchased. I am a Baker. But I will not bake for the time being. That challenge is just too big at this 3rd week in. Maybe in the future but not now. My sister and I used to eat "virtual candy bars" when we dieted together a few years ago. See, I know what a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup tastes like...so once in a while if I sit quietly, and draw on that memory, I can have the candy bar in my mind without ever opening the wrapper of one. Wierd but true. Try it sometime!
I hope this helps someone with their own challenges on how to mentally prepare for the things that just pop up in our minds.
Until next time, good luck, stay strong, we CAN do this!
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