Tuesday, January 15, 2013
I know this is an incredibly shallow desire, but I was a "fat girl" throughout school, maybe not the fattest in the room, but at least 2nd-or 3rd place. Couple that with my anxiety and extreme shyness and I never got attention from boys. It didn't really bother me too much at the time; I've always been the type that has more important things to worry about, but now looking back I feel like I missed out on part of that typical teenager experience. Even when I did kinda have boyfriends, they wouldn't "officially" date me because they didn't want to be seen in public with me.
Today men still don't look at me. It kinda starts to make someone feel bad after so many years. Back then I always thought, "It'll be different when I'm older." Now that I'm older it's not. I hope I'm not just dog ugly. It has to be something, and I'm hoping it's my weight rather than the latter. If I meet someone online they'll talk to me fine until they see me, then it's a dead stop. I don't hear from them again. They don't even make an excuse to stop talking. I know I don't need someone like that to begin with, but after it happens so many times it gets kinda hurtful.
This isn't the main reason for my weight loss. My main reason is for myself: to be healthier, feel better, be stronger, and have more stamina. I'm tired of being tired all the time. However, becoming a "hot girl" will be the icing on the cake. I can't wait for them to eat their heart out.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
My resolution was to follow a workout schedule this year, without adding an unnecessary amount to lose weight faster, which I always end up doing and thus burning myself out within a month. I decided to do the Turbo Jam series and follow the schedule, then do 10 minutes of yoga per day and after that, only if I feel like it, add 30 minutes of something "fun" in the evening such as walking on the treadmill while watching tv, a dance game, or a belly dance video. Today was the first time I did my full 40 minutes of Turbo Jam, and added my yoga.
Trying yoga for the first time; beforehand I thought 10 minutes would be well enough to cool down after a workout, but when it was over I thought "Really? It's over already?", I'm debating on adding 10 or 20 minutes starting next week if I still feel the same. It was definitely a lot more fun than I thought it would be; it burned a lot more too! I assumed it would be easy and boring. Shame on me.
when I finished I said to myself. "Awesome, I did all of it!" I love feeling proud of myself throughout the day rather than lazy.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Week one is over and today marks the beginning of week two. I didn't miss a day of scheduled exercise, which ultimately is my goal for now. I'm only schedule for 5 days a week, and today I felt a little weak after missing a couple days. I'm not sure if it was the little break, or if today is an off day. Had a terrible night last night with multiple power outages which left me tired today. I can't sleep when the power is out for some odd reason. Didn't feel like working out today, but I made myself. After I got started it was ok.
I know I've lost a couple inches because my pants are lose, but I've yet to measure. However, today was weigh-in day and I lost 1.5 lbs last week. Not bad considering my diet wasn't always spotless. I've also increased my water to 15 glasses on workout days.
The attack plan for this week is to clean my diet up a little, and to keep pressing as hard as I can during workouts; concentrating perfecting my form.
Wednesday, January 09, 2013
Yesterday I stayed on the low end of my recommended calorie range and resisted the temptation to eat every bit of junk food I see throughout the day, (Which is a lot.) I even made a healthier dinner for myself instead of eating the hamburger helper everyone else asked for.
I'm not the type to try and eliminate every bit of unhealthy food from my diet, because I know that for myself that's just asking for failure. Though, I live with a bunch of hardcore junk food junkies and it's hard to resist when I see things everywhere I go. In the fridge, on top of the fridge, in the cabinet. It's everywhere. Sometime's it feels like a nightmare.
Yesterday I resisted though, and I burned about 970 calories more than I took in.
Tuesday, January 08, 2013
Woke up a bit sore from yesterday's workout, but not uncomfortably so. Finished my second Turbo Jam workout today; the last day of Learn & Burn. Most of the moves came a bit easier and I got tired faster today. I think due to the fact that I was a little sore to begin with, but I kept moving the entire time and tried to concentrate on perfecting my form rather than being tired. Now that I've finished the second workout I'm really starting to "feel the burn", in my arms and abs. I love the soreness though; it reminds me that I'm improving myself and am well on my way to reaching my goals.
Turbo Jam is fun so far, and Chalene is a good motivator. I almost don't want to let her down by quitting. Definitely having a lot more fun with it than I have with other videos, and I can't wait for the "real" workouts to start tomorrow.
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