Tuesday, December 01, 2009
GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)
To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren,
nieces, nephews or students...here is something to make you chuckle.
Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.
And the first thing he said was ..........'DON'T !'
'Don 't what ?' Adam replied.
'Don't eat the forbidden fruit.' God said.
'Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit ?
'No Way !'
'Yes way !'
'Do NOT eat the fruit!' said God.
'Why?' Said Adam.
'Because I am your Father and I said so!' God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped
creation after making the elephants.
A few minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!
'Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?' God asked.
'Uh huh,' Adam replied.
'Then why did you?' said the Father.
'I don't know,' said Eve.
'She started it! ' said Adam.
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,
don't be hard on yourself.
If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
6 THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk.
Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you
shouldn't have said
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own
6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY:
Be nice to your kids.. They will choose your nursing home one day
IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: 'TAKE TWO ASPIRIN' AND 'KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN'!!!!!
I hope this had you laughing, because laughter really is the spice of life. It cures loneliness and depression and costs absolutely nothing!
Monday, November 30, 2009
This day is proving to be very long......out.
I have decided to improvise with my meals for today to incorporate my children taking us to a slap up dinner . It's been forever since they have been in a financial position to do this. They have been eking out a living and have been supported by us for most of their 4yr marriage (esp the last week of the month lol) and finally things have financially improved for them due to a small inheritance and they want to spoil us to say thank you. So, while I do understand about "looking after" myself, and saying no to desert, I also don't want to rain on their parade and happiness. So this is what I decided to do...eat very little through the day, but include most food groups in whatever I ate all the same.
So, breakfast was
1 Large fried Egg - 92 cals
Half a slice of wheat toast - 32 cals
2 medium slices of tomatoes - 8 cals
BREAKFAST TOTALS - 133 cals with 3 food groups.
1 Cup of soup made from
50 grams of chicken breast (no skin) - 55 cals
50 grams of onions - 19 cals
50 grams of broccoli - 5 cals
50 grams of butternut squash - 20 cals
LUNCH TOTALS - 108 cals with protein and veggies.
100g of apples - 59 cals
100g fresh cabbage - 25 cals
SNACK TOTALS - 84 cals with 2 food groups
That's only 325 cals all day and I'm feeling it, not that I'll die of course. I've been drinking plenty of water, lemon water and learned that drinking boiled water with lemon juice in it is WONDERFUL....who would have thought that?
Never mind, I will survive till 6pm and then I will SUPER ENJOY my dinner.
So now all that's left is a lovely short bath (water still in short supply due to drought) and dress up and look fresh. Then lastly track my dinner using an estimate. I am going to be so excited when I end up well within my calorie range. ITS GOING TO BE WORTH IT.
So far my sons are using their inheritance wisely....so far!
The kids have split the costs on putting up two water tanks with a pump to bring it indoors to the geyser. This will help us to catch some of the precious gems (rain) falling from the sky. The rains not enough to fill the town dam but will be plenty for our household use. It's expensive at R1600 per tank, plus the cement to create a solid base for it to stand on plus the labor costs. What a beautiful gift! No amount of diamond jewelry/new cars/fake fur coats/paid holiday etc could be as beautiful a gift as these water tanks. It just shows, what goes round comes round. We have helped them survive for their 4 yr marriage with no long faces and now they are helping us. Beautiful isn't it?!
Actually it has been really cute watching the kids (esp the married two) whooping over their inheritance. It is absolutely thrilling to see their excitement. It is not a million dollar inheritance, but big enough for many many things. They rushed off and sat in the coffee shop deciding how to spend their money. First they put an amount down to contribute to the world wide preaching work , next came an amount for fixed deposit followed by new refrigerator (they have never been able to afford one before), washing machine and microwave. Dil has booked her appointment for her drivers licence and my son is looking for a LDV to cart his djemba drums around in. This inheritance has allowed him to quit his full time job, take a part time one and concentrate on his music instead. It will also allow him more time in the ministry.
I'm so thrilled for them. My younger son is a bit gob-smacked and other than knowing he wants to launch his music career and purchase a car, he doesn't not know what to do with the rest. Lets hope he looks after it and doesn't allow any sharks to find him and wheedle it out of him. Hopefully he will allow us, his parents to guide him wisely.
I'm glad he can buy a vehicle because when he moved to Dubai, he gave his car to his cousin who was getting married. This enabled his cousin to have a vehicle to drive around in to start his brand new business. What we never realized was that my son would be back from Dubai so soon due to the economic setback that country has had. This left the cousin feeling guilty and my son agreeing of his own accord to allow his cousin to keep the vehicle - him being a married man. My son and I have shared my vehicle since then. So it's payback time and I'm so thrilled for the character that this youngster showed.....THAT'S MY BOY.
I'd better go now, because I'm beginning to brag and that's not nice....but I can't help myself.
DINNER OUT..... . I will do my best to make it a healthy chicken or something like that.
Dinner ended up being worse than I thought. It began with a glass of semi-sweet because they did not have dry white. Oh dear. Next came the starter..best on the list was crumbed, but sadly deep fried mushrooms. I ate 2 and gave the rest to my dil. Then, the menu had been reduced and nothing on the menu was really calorie friendly. I had a mushroom sauce sirloin (which was the best option) everything else was fried this or fried that. The veggies were a pile of fried chips (asked for rice-no rice cooked-grr) also got 2 balls of spinach rolled in batter and deep fried..yikes. Pumpkin also was sweetened. Ended with desert. I bowed out on that, but had 2 bites (2 teaspoons of dil's) peppermint tart. All in all my dinner cost me 1,388 calories which put me over. I'm allowed between 1200-1600 and I ended up on 1,714. The only good thing about this is.....if I had not watched my calorie intake all day, this would have been a train smash instead of a slight derailment. So all was not lost.
It was one evening, tomorrow I will rectify those extra calories.
BECAUSE I WILL BE AT GOAL BY OCT 2010!
Saturday, November 28, 2009
We all have them right?
Well, I have for weeks now managed to keep my inner child well and truly disciplined into near non-existence. This weekend however, she made her appearance and totally insisted on being seen and heard and FED. Oh my word. Yesterdays barbecue (called braai in South Africa and pronounced braai as in cry) she ate salad (harmless) potato bake with cream and bacon (not so harmless) and a piece of chicken (good one) and a beef chop (hmm not so wonderful) and a piece of sausage (ugh) and...yes and a piece of steak (good heavens child, where do you put it all?) At scrabble she ate yucky sweet sticky confectioneries...more than one. Oh and French bread with diabolical toppings. Guess everyones in the party mood prematurely. NO NO NO NO gotta get a handle on this. October 2010 is round the corner. A year so quickly flies by whether you cheat or not. I AM AM AM - do you hear me - I repeat - AM AM AM going to lose my weight by October next year.
I really tried to explain to my inner child that she is no longer welcome in my life and home.
But did the brat listen? Oh no, typical of rebellious children, she made her appearance felt and in my face at that....mouth to be specific.
Hmm I wrestled with the problem of what to do with this errant child and decided that I should "kill" her off, but would my conscience let me? I mean murder...thats a bit radical isn't it?
Ugh, kids you cant live with them and you cant live without them.....but this is one brat I didn't give birth to, so I shouldn't have to deal with her. She's got to go...OUT OUT OUT!
Okay laughs over. I felt sick because I/ME/MYSELF (no-one else to blame) PIGGED OUT something awful this weekend. But (said in a whiny voice) I want to share the blame with someone.
Dare I blame having been sick?
Dare I blame having been exhausted from being sick?
Dare I blame the sweet sick old dear that came to pass her condolences regarding Alex's death and spent over an hour crying, coughing and spluttering on me with no escape for me?
I was more than happy to blame all this facets till I shockingly read in one of the sp pieces they so "sweetly" share with us that obesity in fact plays a bigger role in weakening the immune system than anything else. HEY WAIT NOW...is this for real. I cheekily even googled it and its real all right. So, no blaming anyone technically, but myself.
Just the other day I was telling hubby that this has been my worst year for being ill. I have in the past genuinely enjoy disgustingly good health, but this year I've been hit pretty hard. I do think that in part (someone help me share the blame pleeez) sharing my home with so many needy family members for the last two years has got to help too. Seriously, it has been two years of hot bed syndrome as various needy family have slept in my sons room, the lounge etc. It is finally coming to an end fortunately. I don't regret helping them, they would do it for me too, but......
This is seriously what it was like for 2 years.
Hubby and I obviously live in our home shared with our youngest son. We are fixtures.
My eldest son and daughter in law needed to come and stay with us after my dil's mother died and she no longer wanted to live apart from me (in case I died) This sad young woman has lost her entire family to premature death in a relatively short time, except for her brother living in the UK. So, they moved into our lounge. Our furniture was put in storage and they stayed there for nearly a year while they got jobs and saved for deposits, furniture etc. Rentals are pretty expensive compared to incomes here. But they now have a cutest little apartment around the corner and are very happy there.
They moved out and my young nephew moved in while saving to get married and purchase household equipment and get a brand new business off the ground. He did that within 8 months and also lives around the corner in a cute little bachelor flat. They have done it up and its cute cute cute.
He moved out and my second nephew and his wife moved in. Fortunately these two were financially stable and just required literally days to find an apartment. They didn't even unpack their vehicle for the 5 days they were with us.
They moved out and my dearest sister and her hubby moved in while they looked for a job. They are in the ministry and used their own finances to preach in far away places for 2yrs and are home again due to funds being depleted. Getting a job is difficult to find since they are both in their 50's. In South Africa, its almost an impossible mission. A lot of internal issues still going on in our beautiful country. Anyway, to get back to the point...low and behold, with lots of praying, they found a job running a bed and breakfast. They were late in answering the ad. and the owners of the B&B were late in checking all the candidates. How lucky was that. Maybe luck had nothing to do with it. Anyway, they begin at the end of January 2010. So pretty soon our house will be our own. Maybe I should whisper that . And then of course, not forgetting that mamma dear lives with us too on a permanent basis.
Then we had Alex as a wonderful addition to our lives. Sadly that was temporary.
So...all in all, maybe these past two years have been filled with excessive work, hectic schedules, tons of people and so maybe, just maybe it did have to share some of the blame and next year will be a lot better. It will be interesting to see if 2010 sees me in the good health that I used to enjoy up till this year. Then I will accept that obesity is not the only issue I have. But, if I continue with health issues, then I have to accept that there are other factors. Someone suggested that my being nearly 50 plays a part....I don't believe it has too. I really don't!
But, the good news is that today I genuinely am feeling worlds better. I can't wait for next week to be over, because I do think I will be feeling ready for my regular life. This going out to get household things done only round 10am and getting in before 3pm with laundry etc and coughing all night long is not for me. I mean...it really isn't fun.
I loved being healthy. I want my good health baaaaack!
Well my spark friends, I have put my soap box away, strangled the brat and decided that good behavior is for me. So tomorrow morning will see me ON MY BEST BEHAVIOR. What was the point of hearing the wonderful, and exiting and motivating talk on BE-DO-HAVE if I don't practice what I learned? No good.
So its a newly charged Celeste' on her white steed to rescue her from herself.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
I've had a sneak preview that my next mini-extreme challenge will be rowing down a nearby river. I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE ROWING or make that being rowed lol, this will be my first time rowing myself so I'm truly excited. When I went to gym, the row master was my favorite piece of equipment. Now here comes the real deal and I cant wait to see if I love it more.
My youngest son said to my sister that variation is very important for the body not to grow accustomed to what its doing.....that's so true!
Now I'm not supposed to know because then I already start putting up mental blockades lol but my sister and I are like Siamese twins, what the one knows the other has to know unless we are told it's confidential then wild horses won't drag it out of us.
Initially when I told my family about the BE-DO-HAVE motivational speaker they all had that bored expression on their faces. Can't blame them though, I have after all spent all my kids lives dieting and getting larger each year. Hubby also wore that ho-hum expression. Once again no blaming him either, I was a size 38 when we met and was so embarrassed to get into shorts or a costume because of my weight then, now I am a 44 and 20kgs heavier...awful truth.
But since they are seeing my determination this time round, they have gotten so involved. My elder son recently offered me a boiled sweet and before I could even say no thanks, my younger son took it (as if to pass it on) and tossed it as far as he could throw it I was happy cos I wasn't going to eat it anyway.
Everyone is getting so involved in planning my extreme dream outings. Wednesday evening last week hubby took me walking on a beach, I had to walk on the SOFT SAND and it was exhausting. I made several stops, but at least I completed the walk albeit with a beet red face. Then came Thursday's extreme challenge which was hectic followed by Friday's unbelievable hike up the beach with it's 128 steps. I thought we were going to the beach for ice-creams lol and had already decided to have a frozen yogurt instead. What a shock to find myself walking up a steep hill from the beach front to the top of the hill where the B&B's are. What a surprise to encounter 128 steps. And then no mercy when I had to walk down the same 1.5kms and the 128 steps again. I really can't remember a time I have ever been so tired. Maybe my wild coast trip - that would compare, but that's about 3 yrs ago already.
Tonight was a joke because my sister invites me to join her for a coffee outing, claiming she is tired of the sound of rugby in the house. That was true, and so was I, it's not my favorite sport. She said "don't dress up, it's just us girls".
I didn't even question that statement or give it a second thought, but I changed my t-shirt for a decent shirt, and took off my sloppy home shoes and put on decent sandals. We go to a place called Picasso's with it's beautiful artwork everywhere, gentle music and sat outside on the deck facing the mountain. The weather was cool and misty (just perfect) and we shared a toasted chicken salad sandwich and had some fabulous filter coffee. After about 30minutes of chatter her married kids pitch up. I smiled thinking they were joining us, greeted as they came over but wondered why they didn't sit down???? Next thing my nephew grabs my shoulders and laughingly says "you've been had, we're taking you for a long walk on the beach!"
I was well and truly had!! We drove to the beach where I took off my sandals, rolled up my jeans and off we went....again in the soft sand...ugh!
I'm so proud of myself though because this time I did the same walk I had done with hubby on the Wednesday, in 45 minutes with only 1 short stop to catch my breath. Last time it took me an hr with several short stops. That's improvement. Even though it was a super cool evening, I perspired like a pig. I wonder why they say that...pigs really don't perspire or sweat?
Now I just cannot wait for my next challenge, hopefully by then my camera will be repaired and we get plenty of photo's again. If not, I will just have to report how it went. I can't wait to look back in a years time and see how far I've come.
Some of the photo's from Thursday's mini-extreme dream I couldn't even use for the embarrassment of seeing my stomach hanging out, one photo my son made us all jump in the air after negotiating a very steep downhill descent and my stomach sticks out like a giant white pillow.
I was soooo embarrassed, but never mind, a year from now things will be different, I will be proud of my much lesser midriff. I have tucked the photo away in a book I'm keeping for myself. Although I'm embarrassed now, in a year I will be showing off my new shape and the photo will suddenly be interesting to look back on.
This is the 'before we jumped' photo.
So it's off to bed to sleep and see what tomorrow brings. Monday is usually my shopping day but heck who knows what my family will surprise me with
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Well the day went a bit squiffy and the dream had to be cancelled...or so I thought. With excessively high winds, the concept of swimming through a mountain gorge became non-doable. We were all a bit nervous of what the winds might have blown into the mountain rivers that could not be seen. In the end, I did a whole bunch of other things because I thought nothing would come of my extreme dream this day.
By 4pm, my younger son walks in and says "what's this about no mini-extreme dream happening?" In the end, he says we've just changed the venue, not the concept. Aaarg by now I am smashed....but decided that I would do it. I had planned for this, looked forward to it, and didn't want the very first one to dissolve. So I put on my hiking boots and set off.
These are my persecutors...er....I mean my family.
Last minute misgivings....its late in the day....I can't get out of this and do I really want to? Classic case of on the one hand and on the other hand....
Tired already and barely walked 10 paces. Hmmm forest buzzard, makes you think, doesn't it?! I'd better make it....or else!
First obstacle....fallen tree. Heave ho and over she goes
Managed that with GREAT DIGNITY.....
After a major stiff uphill climb, Michelle, daughter in law takes pity on me and extends a helping hand.....sweet girl.
Now this looks like a classic case of "arse creeping" but the truth is.....
He was pushing me uphill which is seen from this better angle.
I have thus far negotiated a stiff uphill +- 4stories of mountain path. I am hot, tired and muscles are already complaining and to my horror I don't think we are even a quarter way through...it is after all a mini-EXTREME dream. Oh boy, I was already soooo tired.
Hubby seemed proud of me and that made me feel like a million dollars.
But still thought I had to be a little crazy to attempt extreme dreams, no matter how mini considering my age, bad knees and weight factors. But then, I've always been a little crazy.
Finally we stop climbing up and up and get to some straight walking, hence the smile on my face.
The smile on my face didn't last long once I realized that what goes up...must come down. And down we went, down down down.....
..till we got to this cute harmless looking natural bridge.
Once I had successfully navigated the little bridge, it was uphill once more.
The forest was lush and incredibly beautiful, and absolute pleasure on the eyes, even if the body was having a tough time.
Saw these trees I had to walk through and almost prayed that they part for me like the red sea did for Moses. Imagine if I got stuck between them in the middle of the forest............oh my word!
Another log bridge to get across a bit more slippery than the last one.
I was finally so exhausted that if I could call on Oprah, Dr Phil or Bill Gates as my personal friends, I would have asked them to airlift me out. I didn't think I could get more tired if I tried.
My son decided to brave the bitter water and take a swim....
And then wet me as I passed him on the bridge.
I get told we are near the end....that brought a HUGEST smile to my face.
Which was once again wiped off my face once I saw the stairs I'd have to walk down. My knees felt non-existent and I wondered if I would have knees left over at all in the morning?
This where I have to get down to....the others are way ahead of me, but that's ok. A good few stairs and I'll be there too.
Michelle and I laughing about last years walk to the Strawberry farm. Last year I was walking slowly for her. She has gotten so fit, that this year she is walking slowly for me. The tables have turned.
Last bend and I'm FINALLY on the home stretch.
I've finally got nothing left to say, no smiles left, simply no nothing left. In fact, if not for the automatic messages from brain to limbs (left foot-right foot-left foot-right foot) I may have lain down and waited for the forest buzzards to do their damnedest. I think I have worked out why this hiking trail has been named as it has.
Through the end gates and about 10 more steps to my vehicle...question is...will I make it?
This is the UTTERLY EXHAUSTED face of an overweight nearly 50 year old woman who has completed her first mini-extreme dream.
Back home with a cup of herbal and dearest Cole who took my photo's AS PROOF that I DID IT....I REALLY DID IT.
I sat at my garden table thinking, I may have been behind,in fact far behind this particular group of family that kindly kept me company and walked with me.....But I was ahead of many many other overweight, nearly 50 yr old woman with bad knees around the world. So I am actually rather proud of myself even though I am utterly exhausted, will need to take some anti-inflammatory tablets to sleep tonight lol. But heck, I could just sit in a heap and what fun would that be.
So my friend, I have completed my first Thursday MINI-EXTREME DREAM and I am one PROUD LADY. I wish you all this experience. It challenges you, you think up new cuss words (and don't express them) and learn to rely on your family and love them all the more for sharing your dream with you in your quest to lose weight. So what's my next mini-extreme dream, my dear family?
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