Sunday, February 26, 2012
I stepped on the scale this morning so see 251.2. That is a gain of 1.2 lbs. I had a deficit of over 8000 calories for the week, so I do not believe it is real and even on the days I did "bad", I still burned more calories then I ate according to my bodybugg . So this is just a slight set back. Hopefully next weeks weigh in will make up for this week, though I am definitely not expecting a weight loss of 5lbs to bring me to my goal of 246 by my birthday. I am ok with that.
Two things I have realized this passed week:
1. I am no longer completely focused on the scale. The number on the scale means diddly-squat to me. One of my friends asked me to do a competition with her husband to see who could lose the most weight and the reward would be money. At first, I said yes. But after thinking about it later in the day, I realized I do not want to be part of a weight loss competition where the only determining factor is the scale (seriously though, are there any other factors that can be accurately measured??). I showed a gain this week and I am not the least bit phased by it. My feelings about the gain is this: "OK, so I gained this week. I know I did good this week. It will come off next week." The end.
Why go back to focusing on the scale and pushing myself to decrease a number on the scale when right now, I care more about increasing the levels on the elliptical; seeing the numbers on the dumbbells I use with my trainer increase; hearing my trainer tell me he can see that I am much stronger and have more stamina; my clothes becoming too big to wear; feeling(too much fat right now to see) the muscles in my arms and legs; having more energy; automatically making healthy eating choices without having to think about it; and being able to eat throughout the day (with the exception of yesterday) without having to log my food and know that I am still within my range.
This is truly becoming a lifestyle change. I am doing these things without thinking. Yes, I still have bumps in the road. Yes, I still have occasional gains. Yes, I still screw up and binge every once in a while. But I don't know one single thin, healthy person who doesn't over do it on occasion. It's a part of life. I like being able to fit those "binges" in throughout this journey because they will be a part of my life forever; even when I am in maintenance mode. This brings me to something else I learned this week.
2. I can no longer plan binges. I will occasionally plan a binge for one day where I will eat something I no longer eat regularly but use to. Such as hot cheetos and cheese dip. I love love love hot cheetos dipped in cheese dip. It's so damn good and prior to July 2011, I use to have it at least once a month maybe even every other week. And when I would eat it, I wouldn't just eat a small bag of cheetos. I would get the big bag and it would be gone in two days. That is like 5000 calories of unhealthy, non-nutrient filled crap I would consume just because it tasted so damn good.
Another thing is Kiddie Chow, or most of you would know it as Muddy Buddies. Chex mix with peanut butter and chocolate covered in powdered sugar? Yum, yum, yum. This is what I planned as my splurge or binge for Thursday. Actually I planned it for Wednesday but I was busy so never got around to making it. So I made it Thursday, measured all the ingredients out, put it in the spark recipe website to see how many calories are in it. Before I tell you how many calories are in it, let me first say that I use to sit with the whole big bowl of it in front of the TV just eat it. No measuring, so really I could eat roughly 3 cups of it and have no idea. Anyway, a 1 cup serving is 375 calories. Holy Moly! If you only eat a half of cup, it's not too bad. It would be roughly 188 calories. But who could eat only a half of cup? The stuff tastes so dang good. So looking back, I would probably consumer over 1000 calories of the stuff in one setting. Now that I am counting calories, is it worth it? No, not really. I will no longer be making it at home and will only indulge when someone else makes it for a party or something.
So back to what I learned. When I plan one day binges, they don't last one day. They last roughly three days. That is what happened this week. I planned for Thursday to be high in calories and figured I would get back to low calories on Friday. That didn't happen. Thursday, Friday and Saturday were high in calories with Friday being the highest, strangely enough. Saturday really wasn't that bad. Had the bar I went to had bottled water, I would have been just fine with my calories but nope, I had to drink soda so that was 200 unwanted and unneeded calories. I don't know if it was my taste buds or the soda had too much syrup in it, but it was super sweet and tasted like crap. I was so mad they didn't have bottled water.
So to sum up. I have learned this truly is a lifestyle change and I am on the right track and I can no longer plan binges and if I decide to, I need to plan them for a couple of days.
But don't fret, I am back on track. I see my trainer tomorrow and since it is the last Monday of the month, he is going to weigh me to see how much I have lost in the passed month. I really wish I could remember what my weight was at the beginning of January. I have no idea what to expect.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
I have officially lost all the weight I gained since the last time I was on SP back in 2008. In 2007, I started SP. I lost a total of 49.8 lbs and got down to 251.2 lbs from 301 lbs. This time around, I kept comparing this journey to my last. Every week, I would compare how I was doing this time to how I did last time. Once I passed the 22 week mark, I had nothing else to compare. I was kind of in no man's land. But I knew I still had a while to go to completely be in no man's land. I still had to get below 251 because I have been 251 before and getting below that was goal.
I stepped on the scale this morning to see 250 lbs. I beat it! I lost 3.2 lbs this week. Now I kind of feeling like I am at the beginning. I re-lost everything I gained and now I am working on losing what I didn't before. I am excited. This is so new! And I believe it is going to be a lot of fun.
I also am officially in a size 18. So I have dropped three sizes since July. Before starting, my 24's were too tight on me, but of course I refused to go any higher. Just going up to size 24 was hell for me because I never wanted to be bigger then 22. Not that 22 is any better. But now I am a size 18 and will be busting my ass to get down to a size 12/14 by this July. Well, technically June 26th since that is the actual date I started. But my cruise is in July and I would love to be a size 12 or 14. 12 is goal, but I will be more then happy with a size 14. I can't wait to not have to shop at Lane Bryant and Avenue. I can see it in my future and I am going to work towards it!
Who is with me???
Sunday, February 12, 2012
I got on the scale this morning to find that I lost 3.8 lbs "this week ." I put quotes around "this week" because I don't believe I actually lost the weight this week. I believe it was a mix of the passed two weeks. If you remember, I had a slight weight loss last week even though I did very well lat week with the exception of the weekend. So I believe this total was for both weeks.
I am glad to see the number go down. My goal is to be at 246 lbs by March 4th, just before I go to Vegas for my birthday. Originally I wanted to be at 242, but looking at the numbers, I don't believe that is attainable. That would mean I have to lose more then 10 lbs in 3 weeks. Not going to happen. By 7 lbs in 3 weeks I possible so I going to do it!
Because of being in training at work all week, I skipped the gym. However, I did manage to walk a mile two nights this week and also did strength training on my own at home 1 of those nights as well. I am going to the gym tonight because it's time to get back on track. The last few weeks have been all messed up. But no more. It's time to get back on track of going to the gym 4 days a week: Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
My eating has been really good even though my gym time hasn't. I've only gone above 2000 calories in a day once or twice a week and even when I do, it's not by much. In my opinion, that is still success. But this week, I am going to try to push myself to stay below 2000 all week long. Of course my ultimate goal is to remain under 1800 each day, but I'll take 1999 once or twice a week with the rest of the days being below 1800.
Also on a good note, I tried on a pair of pants that I have had since I was a senior in high school. They are a size 22 jeans from Lane Bryant, from back before the clothing stores changed the sizes. Even when I got them back then, I could not fit in them. I have kept them for the past 8 years hoping one day I would fit in them again. I tried them on in November and couldn't even zip them up. Literally, the zippers couldn't even touch...they were a good 2-3 inches apart. I could barely get them up over my hips and butt. Then I tried them again at the end of December or beginning of January and I could actually zip them up. They were still too tight, but I could zip them up. I tried them on a couple mornings ago and I could actually wear them if I wanted to. They are tight to begin with, but as jeans do, I know they would loosen up throughout the day and be even more comfortable. I am not going to wear them. I hung them up on my wall and my plan is to wear them in Vegas in three weeks. Hopefully I will lose another inch or so to make them more comfortable before Vegas but either way, I am wearing them on my birthday! Why? Because I can!
Sunday, February 05, 2012
So I got on the scale this morning to find that I lost 0.4 lbs. I really don't know why other then I binged yesterday and it's still in my body. But the rest of the week I did really well, especially in eating. So hopefully I will show a 3 lbs loss next week to make up for this. If not, oh well. I will still continue on.
I am not going to make it to the gym much this week because I am in training all week at work and I hate to go to the gym before 10pm. It's so freaking busy and my blood pressure rises when I do. I don't like to be around a lot of people like that. But I am thinking about cancelling my training sessions with my trainer so I can just skip all together. I am really not in the mood to put any added pressure on me. So I am going to the gym tonight and will likely not make it back until next Friday. But I will walk around my apartments and do exercises here at home that are exactly the same ones I do with my trainer. So I won't be taking any kind of break or anything like that. I will just not be doing them in the gym.
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