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My new goal

Saturday, March 21, 2009

I haven't visited Disneyland in 13 years, but this seems like an excellent reason to return! It's a special medal awarded to anyone who completes races at both Disney World aaaaaaand Disneyland.

I'm have a lot of doctors visits coming up, but un shah Allah, as people say here, I'll be cleared to start training soon!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSEMBERSTORM 3/30/2009 6:42PM

    Looks like a great goal gal!

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IZZYBUBBLES 3/23/2009 12:46PM

    Wooohoooo! Do I smell a girls' trip to Disneyland?? I think I do!! Okay, now I have to get DH all buttered up some night and convince him to let me go...maybe I'll leave him home this time so that I can party with the ladies all night! Maybe I'll talk my mom into doing this one with me. She doesn't think she can do it, but she can.

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MARGOMCP 3/23/2009 9:48AM

    Great goal! Hope the doctor visits go well.

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FIENDISHSARAH 3/22/2009 6:31PM

    Keepin my fingers crossed for you Cat- I know you will do awesomely!! (is that a real word? O_o)

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NEWSTART127 3/22/2009 5:40PM

    Oh how neat!
Will keep my fingers crossed that your doctor appointments go well and that your health improves! YOU ROCK!

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TIME4JUDI 3/22/2009 5:39AM

    You continue to be a truly awe-inspiring lady! And b y the way, I LOVE your new pics!!!

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COLORADOTINK 3/21/2009 11:59PM

    thats a great goal.... emoticon

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DEBULACLARK 3/21/2009 10:54PM

    Cat - what a great goal. If anyone can do it, you can! Good luck!!!

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HPTHATBME 3/21/2009 10:14PM

    That sounds awsome, I am wishing you the best!

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SIXFULLERS 3/21/2009 9:27PM

    Keep your eye on the prize! WAY TO GO!!!

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AMUNET_RA 3/21/2009 7:17PM

    Ta da....SUPER CAT!!! Here's to two thumbs up from the docs!!!


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    You are amazing!! Crossing fingers here that the doc visits will go well, and that they'll clear you!

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NMUDDIE 3/21/2009 6:09PM

    You amaze me still! No one knows better than I that, once you make up your mind, there is no stopping you from achieving your goals. I am always SO proud of you. I LOVE seeing you this happy. September 9, here she comes.

Mom emoticon

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WANT2CHNG17 3/21/2009 5:53PM

    Way to go! If anyone can do it, I know you can. You've got grit girl! I LOVE IT!
Rock on!

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LUV_VICKIE 3/21/2009 5:36PM

    emoticon emoticon Cat

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    Rock it OUT girl. :) Gosh you are so amazing. I can't wait to see a picture of you wearing your princess medal, your disneyland medal and THIS one . . for doing both! :D

you rock!!

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MAPLELEAFMOM 3/21/2009 3:48PM

    LOVE IT!!! and I want it too emoticon You can do it ! You know we'll be cheering you on... hopefully I'll be cheering you from DL!

Comment edited on: 3/21/2009 3:56:42 PM

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HRDWLBY 3/21/2009 3:35PM

    Wow! That's special! I haven't been to Disneyland since I was a kid. I'm now going to Disney World yearly as part of my Polynesian Dance workshop. We spend 2 nights there after the workshop is over but only have time to do sight seeing on one day. We usually get a dinner in somewhere in the park.


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ZIRCADIA 3/21/2009 3:27PM

    OOOOH very pretty!!! I know you will do it. :)

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BEXTRESS 3/21/2009 2:25PM

    That sounds like a blast! That medal will be yours!

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NIGHTSKYSTAR 3/21/2009 1:54PM

    what a cool medal!!! you are the BOMB...i am still so proud of you i could bust!
hoping the docs give you 2 thumbs up..or 4..or however many docs with however many thumbs they have....
you are my hero!!!
Love ya!

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KIMCATUS 3/21/2009 1:21PM

    How cool!!! I know you will do it! If anyone can and will, it'll be you! Remember...""!!!R>
Oh and I want pictures of Tigger pleasekthnxsbye!

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COLEISMYSOUL 3/21/2009 1:10PM

    And I hope that you get the signal - all systems are a go. You know I will be here cheering you on! You are one fantastic lady! emoticon

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SLCOLMAN 3/21/2009 12:32PM

    I so admire your determination and perseverance. I need you te teach me how to do it. How to keep going through the pain and medical stuff... How to get the doctors to understand and listen and give me answers and if they can't then how to find the answers and help myself.

You are such an inspiration! I know that you will get that medal :)

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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

I had almost convinced myself not to do it when I landed in Orlando, but when I heard everyone talking about it, I got so excited that I knew I had to try.

Last weekend was daylight savings, so I got very little sleep when the alarm went off at 3 a.m. We were on the bus by 4 a.m. and at the race site by 4:30. I was so wound up I could barely gag down my bagel. I chatted with Snow White and traded Zoolander impressions with Goofy before walking for what seemed like forever to get to the start line.

I had problems almost as soon as the race began. I seriously considered pulling out at the first mile, but I knew I would be too ashamed. I broke it into segments and just kept talking to myself. "Don't end up on the first loser bus." Don't quit in the first hour. Don't quit before the castle." and so on.

The castle was in the sixth mile. I was slogging along, but the cast members were amazing. The park wasn't open yet, and they lined the course and cheered like we were vying for the lead! I ran the whole park portion, except when I hammed it up for the course photographers.

My hips and knees were screaming by mile 8, so the medics kindly biofroze them for me - something we repeated in mile 11. I had run the whole time, believing that that pace van was right behind me and I'd be "red flagged" at any moment. I'd gone out so fast in the beginning that it was hard towards the end, but by mile 12, I knew I could do it.

When I ran into Epcot, the park was open, and everyone was cheering for us. I was so overwhelmed that I cried. (Not for the first time that day, but the first time for a reason other than pain!) I ran with everything I had and set a new personal best. There were loads of people behind me, and I never even saw the red flag.

Afterwards, I boogied down at Disney Studios until early the next morning, wearing my tacky blinker light tiara and my gorgeous medal!

Thanks to everyone who cheered me on and tracked my progress. Knowing that you were "with" me when I ran over the timers on the course kept me going when I wanted to quit.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JEWISHREDHEAD 3/27/2009 3:44PM

    I am SO SO proud of you Cat.

You are an amazing woman, and I am inspired by you!!!

I hope that I can have this sort of success in September!

I nearly cried MYSELF just reading this blog.. no joke! (I am a big softie though...)

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GWEEBE 3/20/2009 8:16PM

    All I can say is...W-O-W!!!

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SLCOLMAN 3/19/2009 4:06PM

    SO AWESOME!!!!!!

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NEWSTART127 3/13/2009 10:21PM

    Oh my, I hadn't gotten an update on your blogs so I'm glad I came looking!!!
I'm so proud of you. I just read your last two blogs and I'm sitting here crying.
You are soooooo amazing. I am so proud of you.
Congratulations on being a superstar and for finishing the race and setting a personal best.
Now take care of those health issues, okay?
Want you to be around for a L O N G time, okay?

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DIZZYKITTY 3/13/2009 9:52AM

    Well done you!!!! You should be so proud of yourself! emoticon emoticon

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LUV_VICKIE 3/13/2009 7:44AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
I am so glad to see your blog. You are my SHERO ! ! ! You are showing us it can be done.
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JUSTKIMBERLY 3/12/2009 10:42PM

    Oh honey.... I'm sitting here in tears. I'm so so proud of you! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

We ALL love you!

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CJBAGGINS 3/12/2009 10:40PM

    What a beautiful medal for a beautiful person! Well done, Cat. You did it. Others said you couldn't do it (wanker docs spring to mind), and you weren't sure yourself at times, but you did.
A trophy to go with the medal.


Comment edited on: 3/12/2009 10:40:40 PM

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AIMEE_B 3/12/2009 8:59PM

    Cat, you are an inspiration! my eyes welled up as i read! Congratulations on a majoraccomplishment!!


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MAPLELEAFMOM 3/12/2009 2:55PM

    I am sooooo proud of you! You are an amazing woman and I only wish I could have spent the whole weekend hanging out with you. Where do we meet next?! I'll leave my kids at home with their Dad so we can just be 'Goofy' LOL!!!

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SHORTTOOTH1 3/12/2009 10:43AM


I'm so proud of you.

Three Cheers!

I knew you could and would do it.

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BRAVAH 3/12/2009 10:23AM

    Oh Cat!!! That is so amazing! I know how much this race meant to you and I am soooooo happy for you!

Great job! Woohoo!



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BEXTRESS 3/12/2009 9:22AM

    Wow - way to make me cry at work! You're so amazing and I'm so very proud of you! emoticon

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AMUNET_RA 3/12/2009 8:53AM

    ((HUGS)) **tears up while reading/replying**

I am SO proud of you!! And so happy for you! I'm thrilled that you did this and hope that you enjoy the rest of your holiday! (but I miss you like crazy!!)

((HUGS)) **still sort of misty**...

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    Ooh, you added a picture of your medal!! that is so awesome!!!! I love it!

And super huge congratulations on getting a personal best-you are one absolutely amazing woman!!

Comment edited on: 3/12/2009 8:47:34 AM

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    I knew I knew I KNEW you could do it! Reading your post made me tear up. (((hugs))) Im' so incredibly proud of you and I'm SO glad that you did it. You are amazing and you deserve that medal and that tiara. And a personal best! You inspire me!!!!!!

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SIXFULLERS 3/12/2009 1:22AM

    Cat - I'm so proud of you! Your perseverance is an inspiration!

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MSEMBERSTORM 3/11/2009 10:04PM

    YEAH!!!!! I am so proud of you! I knew you could do it! You did it! See gal. You hit that goal square in the teeth and won! I am so freaking happy for you. You really do inspire me! You deserve to stand proud, raise your hands in victory and let that primal scream be heard. You did it! I am so very happy for you! So very, very happy.

Big hugs

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KIMCATUS 3/11/2009 9:50PM

    Biofreeze rocks! lol

I am so proud of you, and wish I could have been there with you in person not just in spirit, but I tell ya I couldn't run that far! You are so amazing and I just love you so much! Wear that medal proudly my beautiful deserve it!!!

Love you!

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COLEISMYSOUL 3/11/2009 9:03PM

    Do you realize what you have done not only for yourself, but so many others? Reading others comments, it is just amzing how much SPARK you have given them. Congratulations to you and what you stand for in the eyes of others!

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MDMNINA 3/11/2009 8:13PM

    Sorry I didn't get to meet you! I have committed to Raven1025 that I will run it with her next year. And we are going to be Lady Tremaine and the Ugly Stepsisters at the after-party! Congratulations on finishing! See you next year.

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WANT2CHNG17 3/11/2009 7:45PM

    Oh. My. GAWD!! I simply cannot express how happy I am - and how very proud I am of you! I actually got a tear in my eye reading this. You - you sweet, wonderful woman, have shown us all what it is to have HEART. Despite your rude cow orkers and "friends," despite what the doctor said, you DID it! You have warmed the very cockles of my heart (not sure exactly what cockles are, but, rest assured, you have warmed them).

Wear your medal and tiara proudly, Princess. You've earned them with spirit, grit, a whole lotta work, heart and soul.

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MILLER32807 3/11/2009 7:38PM

    I am so proud of you. I'm very glad that your health did not stop you from accomplishing this... and I guess I'm glad you didn't listen to my cynical comment a couple blogs ago!! I was worried that this would be more than you could take, but YOU DID IT!!!!!!! You are so amazing!


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DANIMITE2 3/11/2009 7:20PM

    I didn't really cry after the finish until I found your name on the list of finishers. I hate to say I told you so, but.....


I hope you wear your medal to work and to your next doctor's appointments! Show them what a strong woman you truly are!

I told Brad as we were leaving the team meeting that if we were near one another IRL, I thought that you and I would be great friends. I love your spirit...and you can see it in your eyes! I'm so proud to have trained and run this race with are a treasure!

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RAVEN1025 3/11/2009 7:03PM

    I am so incredibly proud of you! I knew you could do it!
I'm sad I missed you at the race and party, though :(

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TIME4JUDI 3/11/2009 6:52PM

    Yet ANOTHER reason for me to be in awe of you! You are SO amazing! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FLORIDAFAN 3/11/2009 6:31PM

    Way to go girl! I am glad to hear you made it! I wish I would of seen you at the party, but by that time I was dragging!

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IZZYBUBBLES 3/11/2009 6:26PM

    WOOOHOOOO!!!!!!!! I had you in the back of my mind the whole time during that race, hoping you were okay. The first thing I did when I got back to the hotel was text Danielle to see if she'd heard from you. emoticon I knew you could do it!! You are amazing, it was a privilege to spend time with you.

Enjoy the rest of your trip!!! Wear that medal because YOU EARNED IT, PRINCESS!!!!!! emoticon

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    You are amazing and I'm SO proud of you!!!!

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ZIRCADIA 3/11/2009 6:23PM

    I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!! I heard via Emily and Kim's stuff that you finished and I am just so proud of ya! :D *HUGSHUGSHUGS* AND HAPPY FOR YOU!!! What is biofreezing? CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D

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NIGHTSKYSTAR 3/11/2009 6:19PM

    WITH you??? you bet we were with you!!!
i was cheering and praying and darn if i didnt shed a few happy tears myself when i saw you had finished. I am so darn proud of you and i hope you are having the time of your life there!!
stand pround your Highness. you deserve every kudo you are getting.
You are totally amazing. Kevin said it too..and believe me thats a big deal!!!
take a dip in the pool for me willya?
Hugs and love

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One challenge down, one challenge to go, and a spot of bad news

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

So I had the "big work thing" today. It was rough. I survived. The Big Boss, the one I've blogged about before, went off and said my results were "completely unacceptable". My immediate supervisor was so upset by Big Boss' behaviour that he actually got up and walked around his desk to stand between us. Yes. Physically between us. Then he walked out to her car with her and told her off some more. I hear there was a big evaluation meeting yesterday, and all of my line supervisors defended me and said that my work ethic is terrific, and that Big Boss is being unreasonable.

After the assessment, I had to go to the doctor. I've been training for this half marathon for months, but as my health deteriorates, I find it harder and harder to walk, let alone run. He had some bad news. My blood work came back showing more evidence of Lupus and that the RA is progressing. And apparently, the difficulties with my training are because the Lupus appears to be attacking my heart, causing congestive heart failure. I've got appointments with specialists lined up to get everything checked out further. Hold a good thought on that front.

He advised me not to run the half marathon. He thinks the strain might be too much on my heart. I told him that I wasn't sure I'd have any self respect left if I gave up.

I need to think about it, but it seems a shame not to at least try. I reeeally want that medal, for so many reasons. It represents my self worth. As I've gotten larger, paradoxically, I've become invisible. I started running marathons when I realised that I was gaining weight no matter what. It would be years before the doctors finally believed me, but those medals were my proof that I wasn't a lazy pig as well as a giant f-u to anyone who thought I didn't matter. And even though I know it's bollocks, I feel like if I don't complete this race, then maybe they're right.

Please don't tell me it's stupid. I already know that.

The other night, I was chatting with a skinny colleague, and she suddenly asked me point blank why I'm so fat. I looked at her levelly and said, "I used to look just like you."

She was stunned. She literally couldn't get her mind around the idea that I could ever have been slender. I've lost 30 lbs. just in the time she's known me, but all she can see is the fat.

And she's my *friend*, so one can only imagine what the others think.

And then there's the race .... I thought I had to maintain a 17-minute pace, which would be really hard for me but not impossible. A few days ago, I learned that I need to maintain a 16-minute pace or be pulled off the course. I've never run a 16-minute pace, so I would either need to run the fastest race of my life, or face the embarrassment of being asked to leave the race.

So where does this leave things? I have to think about it, but I'm inclined to give it a go. And who knows? Maybe the Disney magic will make these poor arthritic joints move this jumbo princess faster than she's ever gone before, because that tiara medal sure would look good on me!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWMOMOVER40 10/21/2009 4:18AM

    I've been reading your blog posts in reverse order - I read about your Disney half experience first, then read this one. I was impressed - having managed a 10K and a 15K just this past summer - that you did go through with that half marathon, struggle though it was. But now to find out that you're also fighting a daily battle with lupus and RA? Just ... wow. Sheer inspiration to keep at it.

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DEBULACLARK 3/21/2009 10:59PM

    I'm so glad you went and completed that race. You're still here and you did it. Be so proud of yourself and you are not certainly not invisible. You've definitely touched my life and inspired me AND I know I'm not the only one....I'm glad that we have met through spark and I'm so looking forward to being on the Hogwarts faculty with you!

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SLCOLMAN 3/19/2009 4:09PM

    Reading about what you go through and how you push through and do so much is insirational to me. I want to run too!!

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NMUDDIE 3/11/2009 6:43PM

    I'm proud of you. I love you. I worry about you.
It would be great to her from you.
Love, Mom emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HLTHYLIVNCCJ 3/11/2009 11:58AM

    I am so sorry to hear what your doctor has to say. But, knowing the strong person you are, you can do anything and achieve it.

Know that my thoughts and prayers are with you!

Cindy emoticon emoticon

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BEXTRESS 3/7/2009 9:21PM

    emoticon Cat, my great aunt had the very same conditions you mentioned. I watched her struggle with them, and I have to say - you're putting up a damn good fight. Keep pushing! You know I'm here for you. Oh, and I wanna be like you when I grow up!

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BRAVAH 3/6/2009 11:45AM

    What does your doctor say about walking the race? I would think that if you kep up a good speed walking pace, that you might be able to keep your heart on a more steady/less stressful pace, allowing you to continue? I used to walk several miles faster than a 16 min/mile pace, have you tried speed walking?

Otherwise, you are doing so well with your goals... don't be too hard on yourself if you medically have to skip this one race. You need to be able to race another day!

And how great that your immediate boss (one who would really know what kind of work you are doing) would stick up for you physically, as well as verbally! That is a great compliment to you and the work you do.

I wish you the best in figuring out more about your health issues, as that will make your goals so much easier to attain. Please keep me posted on what happens with the specialists and etc.


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JEWISHREDHEAD 3/5/2009 12:33PM

    I just wanted to echo what every one else said. You are super inspirational, Cat... and no matter what you choose to do, you are making the right decision. Push yourself to keep achieving, but don't hurt yourself in the process. You're incredible!

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JUSTKIMBERLY 3/5/2009 11:43AM

    Cat... we all just love and adore you to pieces. Do what you need to do for yourself, but please don't harm yourself in the process.

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GINGER_LOSTALOT 3/5/2009 11:24AM

    Faced with all of these challenges, you don't back down. Be proud!

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GWEEBE 3/5/2009 11:22AM

    Cat, we support you in what ever decision you make! And we love you. Slytherin would notbe the same without you. emoticon

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DANIMITE2 3/5/2009 10:19AM

    If it's any consolation (it was to me), there is no guy on a bullhorn in a golfcart nipping at the last runner's heels. In races of similar distances at Disney, there are 1 or 2 parked buses along the course, and they pick up people who no longer want to continue or who have fallen behind the pace. So start strong!

Another thing I've heard is that sometimes Disney employees point you to little "shortcuts"...nothing major, but if that happens, it could save you a few minutes.

Finally, if you look at results from previous years' half marathons, there are often people who "finish" WAY after the pace times.

You've already been given advice about stupid bosses, but I wanted you to know that I'm praying for your health! I believe in a big God...a God who heals and restores! And I believe in the power of the human spirit, and Cat, you have one of the most amazing spirits I know!

Can't wait to finally meet you Friday!

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RAVEN1025 3/5/2009 9:53AM

    I just want you to know you are always in my thoughts. I am sending all the positive energy I can to you. You have an amazing spirit, anything is possible!

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ZIRCADIA 3/4/2009 7:36PM

    *HUGS* I wish you all the best, Cat. You don't deserve to have your health deteriorate and jerk people treat you so insensitively. You rock.

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COLORADOTINK 3/4/2009 4:39PM

    it has been said, you know your self better than anyone ...
follow your heart.... emoticon doctors are just people too. the spirit has a will of its own, so go for it........

have you ever told the BIG BOSS your WRONG....
try it i did it fells realy good.............

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COLEISMYSOUL 3/4/2009 4:35PM

Look at all the people who love and support you! You know yourself and your body, you need to do for you and only you! You know what you are capable of and what you can live with. I could give you some nice words gor your boss and 'friend" but I would get reprimanded. I am not as eloquent speaking as the others are, but I hold you in high esteem, wish you only the best and prayers fir you to make your decision. I am behind you 110%

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NIGHTSKYSTAR 3/4/2009 4:18PM

    Ahhh my dear, sweet, wonderful friend Cat. Now i wish even more that i could be in Floorida. the sweepers would have to get past ME to get to you if they were so inclined. Ask my kids...i'm a force to be reckoned with.
As for the race. I love you--and i support whatever decision you make on it. If you go I will be cheering you on and if you dont I still think youa re the bravest, most inspirational person i know!
I know pain. and i know YOU know pain. You keep me getting up in the morning. today i finally..FINALLY went up the stairs at school without getting out of breath or thinking i'm dying. i'm supposed to take the elevator. every day i look downt the hall to it and think "what would Cat do??"
and i take the stairs. because i know you would. Every time i look at the scale and despair i think...would Cat quit? and i dont quit.

I want to be in a room with Big Boch. just me and her. and your report. not the one SHE did. the one me, and a bunch of other people did. and then i want to dare her to dispute it.
Shes nothing Cat. Nothing. No person that lies and is purposely mean and sladerous is anything. I realize she is the "big boch". tough chit. i think shes lower than a pregnant snake.

I sent you a crown today. you got a tiara from me before and i didnt want you to think i was sucking up or anything ya know??? LOL!! But really...the crown was pretty cool. When you come see me?? you will get your very own tiara.

Just remember are an inspiration to alot of people. Whether you go to Florida or not is not going to make you any more or less in my are already right at the top of the list!!

I love you---your guts(where did i get THAT from??) your glorious self...every bit of you!!!

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TIME4JUDI 3/4/2009 4:17PM

    Yeah. Wow. Stunned, amazed. not even sure how to put it into words. Your blogs have a habit of doing that to me...Lots of awesome responses here them...think, pray...sending a pm and many hugs - Judi

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AMUNET_RA 3/4/2009 2:45PM

    ((HUGS)) I am so sorry that you're going through all this!

About the BIG BOSS...Aaargh! So glad that you have (as Kim said) 'real people' (lol) there to defend you! You know that we're all be there for you (wands at the ready) too! As for your friend. What an odd thing to ask you...

Now as Sarah asks, "Do you trust this doctor's opinions?" Please don't take his advice lightly! BUT of course, you know your body best. You have some heavy contemplating to do, Sweetie!

I have no idea how the 'sweepers' work. I'm imagining a bunch of dementors monitoring the course, but I hope they're not THAT menacing!

Well I think we can all agree that all your Spark family loves, respects and admires you and we'll all stand behind you 100% in whatever decision you make! I wish I was there to give you a big hug, Sweetie!


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MSEMBERSTORM 3/4/2009 2:43PM

    Wow you have really had a rough go hun! I am so sorry you are facing all the crap from the boss. I really do understand how that is. And it sucks a big one!

Big hugs about the news from the doctor. I pray that your health improves. You are so wonderful and special and it just isn't right that you are going through this! Your not being stupid by wanting to participate in that race. You have a goal and you want to accomplish it. There is nothing wrong with that.

While I appreciate your friends comfort in being able to talk to you I think she should have been a lot more tactful or just kept her mouth shut. She knows this is a battle and that you really need the support instead of the judgement. Not that she meant for it to be bad but I just don't think it was very supportive.

You have been so supportive to me and a delight to talk too. I have really grown to like you as a friend and I want to see you succeed and feel better. Much hugs and healing thoughts! You will do this!

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IZZYBUBBLES 3/4/2009 2:42PM

    Oh Cat, my heart aches for you because I know how bad you want this, and I know how disheartening it has to be to hear your doctor tell you not to do the race. The logical person in me says that you should always put your health first, that there will be other races...but my heart says that if I were in your place, I would go for it. One of my favorite running quotes has always been the quote from John Bingham saying that the real success isn't in finishing a race, it's in having the courage to start (that's poor paraphrasing on my part). I think you've already won. Ask yourself how many of your skinny "friends" have the heart and dedication and determination necessary to even train for a half marathon or marathon, much less FINISH one or SEVERAL marathons - my guess is NONE of them. My guess is that not many of them would even bother to start.

You know your body and your heart better than anyone else. You knew when something was wrong despite all the doctors telling you otherwise, and you'll know the right way to approach the race. You've got a whole team full of people that love you that are going to be thinking about you and rooting for you the whole time.

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KIMCATUS 3/4/2009 1:55PM

    Oh honey that is NOT a friend if she can't see past your exterior appearance to your beautiful self inside!!!

I kind of agree with LIMELITESHINES...if you decide to run the race, then to hell with 'em! What are they gonna do? Call the cops and physically remove you?? So go for it if you decide to run!!!

And if you don't decide, then don't do it for yourself and NOT because of some stoopid doctors! You know that NO matter what you decide we're all right here behind you rootin' you on because we love you and know you're worth it! I just wish YOU could see that you're worth it! Because you are!!

About the boss...oy! What an idiot! I wish I had some advice there for ya...I'm just glad that you have some people on your side about all that (I mean real people, not just us "imaginary" folks!).

Anyway take care of yourself, you know we're here for you whatever you need!!!And you'll always be a princess in my eyes! *HUGS*

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    I say go for it.

Why? You know your body the best. You'll be able to, at any point in the race, stop if you feel it's going to really be detrimental to your health. Up to this point you've been doing what you've been doing, and you've been doing it well. So i say go for it.

AND . . . go your 17 minute mile pace. And if they ask you to leave the course? Say NO. And you just keep on going. And you tell them, at the end . . . if 12 minutes is cause to not give you a trophy? Then they can keep their silly trophy because you got what you needed out of it. And I'm sure there are plenty of your Spark friends here who would be more than willing to pitch in and get you the best tiara ever . . . because you deserve it!

So go for it . . do what you can do . . .and be PROUD of what you can do. I'm behind you all the way!!!!

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    Oh honey, I'm so sorry for the bad reports. I sincerely hope the specialists can come up with solutions and halt this. I hate to see you going through all that. I'm praying hard that things will go well in FL, and that the docs will be able to help you.

Hugs and I love you tons!!

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MILLER32807 3/4/2009 12:27PM

    I'm so happy that Supervisor got onto Big Boss about her actions. Its ridiculous how some people will just find reasons to complain!!! I'm soooo sorry to hear about your health. I can not even imagine what you are feeling/thinking at this time. I'm alarmed at how your "friend" said that and looked at you like it was unbelievable that you were ever skinny because it feels like she is judging you and believes that its entirely your fault you are overweight because you are lazy or something. I can only hope that when she was actually talking with you, it didn't come off as rude and inconsiderate as it seems reading it.

I won't say it is "stupid" to compete anyway, but I must say it doesn't sound like the best thing. Do you trust this doctor's opinions? If so, is it worth it to know that you may not finish the race because you die trying? Would you be satisfied to mostly walk it if it means still crossing the finish line but not stressing your body as much? Please really think about this before you make your decision. Remember that you do have people who care/love you, even us people who have never met you. We've come to appreciate the person you are by going this journey with you thru your posts and blogs. I wish you the best!! (sorry my comment was so long)


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Three weeks to the race, and 12.5 miles of pure hell

Sunday, February 15, 2009

I've worked very hard this week in my quest to run the Disney Princess Half Marathon in just three short weeks. I'm honestly worried that I won't be ready. On Saturday, I set out on a 12-mile training "wog" (walk/jog). We've enjoyed rain every day for over three weeks here, so I was pleased to see some sunshine on the run.

It didn't last, and my arthritis reacted to the up and down weather. Pretty soon my back, hips, and knees were a chorus of whinging body parts. I fell way off pace and eventually couldn't even jog. I just walked the last several miles. My three hour music mix finished, and I was still miles from being done myself. So I cued up another 60 minutes and kept at it.

All in all, it took me four hours and 3198 calories to complete 12.5 miles. When I got home, I couldn't get down the steps to take a shower and had to stretch on the living room floor for a while first!

Thanks to almost five hours of exercise for the whole day, I set a personal record of a 3600+ calorie deficit in one day. That's over a pound! Of course, the people who think it's merely "calories in/calories out" are deluded, as my scale proved to me today, when it posted a gain. However, I took it easy today and gave my body a chance to recover, and I'm hoping to see a big loss tomorrow.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    "Calories in/calories out" has got to be the biggest crock in weight loss history. You and Holly are living proof of that. I've never known 2 people who work harder and are more committed than you.

I am sorry that things are not going as planned. My heart hurts for you because I know how hard you've been working. I'll keep you in my prayers.

Love you tons!

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AIMEE_B 2/22/2009 3:06PM

    You can do this, Cat! What an incredible goal!

We'll fully expect photo coverage upon your return!!

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MDMNINA 2/19/2009 1:16PM

    I admire your determination! And I love the term "wog"! I am excited to meet you at Disney World!

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COLEISMYSOUL 2/16/2009 5:46PM

    You will be fine - the crowds will take you. Just remember you are AWESOME!

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AMUNET_RA 2/16/2009 4:21PM

    Have I told you recently how much I admire you?!? ((HUGS)) You ARE amazing, Cat!!!


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MSEMBERSTORM 2/16/2009 2:41PM

    Your determination is amazing! I am so proud of you. You go gal! wooot!

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MAKOTODFW 2/16/2009 12:31PM

    Congrats on surviving the ordeal! dear...are one Hard Core Princess!

That being said...please don't push so hard that you put yourself out of the competition. (sly reference to my own fun this weekend)
I'm walking now...with a cane...
and occasionally the pain jumps up and says, "BOOOGA-BOOOGA!

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ZIRCADIA 2/16/2009 12:23PM

    WOW, that is some serious determination and guts! *HUGS*

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IZZYBUBBLES 2/16/2009 11:02AM

    Way to gut it out, my friend!! I think that finishing tough, crappy runs is probably the best thing for us mentally before the race. I try to look at it this way - when things are that bad, and really couldn't get any worse, and you can still finish anyway, the race is going to be a piece of cake!! Especially when we've got nice weather and all that adrenaline flowing and several thousand other runners and fans to cheer us on. emoticon

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GINGER_LOSTALOT 2/16/2009 9:14AM

    Wow! I'm so proud of you (forget what the scale says!)!

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LIMELITESHINES 2/16/2009 12:32AM

    It's days like these that will make you stronger. You did all 12.5 miles. :) So when you do it again . . . strive to take 10 mintues off. You can do that right? :) And by the time the race comes . . . you'll be a pro at it.

((hugs)) I'm sorry you're in pain . . . I promise it will pass. I'm rooting for you. I hope that stretching felt fantastic. :) :)

I'll be there . . . eventually. Slowly but surely . . i'll be there! Keep after it girl . . . so proud of you!!! :)

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RAVEN1025 2/15/2009 11:17PM

    I am super proud of you for finishing! That's a big accomplishment. I had the same thought as Maple Leaf Mom, and think your body is probably figuring out what was going on, and it will catch up.

Hang in there...we are so close. Just keep picturing that medal around your gorgeous neck!!!

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MAPLELEAFMOM 2/15/2009 10:07PM

    You are truly amazing!!! Even when things weren't going as well as planned you kept going and you finished it! Incredible!! Your pace wasn't that bad and given different weather conditions and such I KNOW you are going to do FANTASTIC at the race! I am so proud of you... and you should be proud of yourself too!!

Also with the weight loss it may take a few days as your body is probably saying 'What the heck is going on !' Also be sure to feed your body enough for it to recover from all that exercise!!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KIMCATUS 2/15/2009 9:02PM

    Hey you finished!!! That is awesome and amazing...I am so proud of you!!! Yeah you know how I feel about the calories in/calories out theory...if that were 100% true it's be EASY to lose weight...and anyone on here how EASY it is to lose weight! So yeah. But you did great and I'm very proud of you and your hard work! Your determination motivates me to to push myself!! Although not that I could do that much...sheesh...I'd be so far behind you it'd be the next day before I caught up with you!!! Either way you rock on pretty little princess and wear that tiara proudly!!! *hugs*

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NEWSTART127 2/15/2009 8:39PM

    How amazing that you pushed through your training run despite the weather and the pain!
You are a true rockstar! Keep up the great work! You're a superhero - never mind a princess!

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MILLER32807 2/15/2009 7:01PM

    I personally don't care that it took you 4 hrs to complete... YOU COMPLETED IT, GIRL!!! You would have come back thru and found me somewhere maybe along the halfway point, laying on the ground, dead to the world. And I probably wouldn't have recovered by the next day. I'd admire you for what you have accomplished!!! You are my motivation!!


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NIGHTSKYSTAR 2/15/2009 6:42PM

    Ahh you are my hero. ok heroine. I hurt FOR you. anyhow wish i could!! so you didnt have to. You are the bravest woman i know!!
sooo its in 3 weeks??? seems like just yesterday you were telling me about it i didnt think it was this soon!
I know you will do great..i only wish i could be there to cheer you on, or do it with you!! (although i'd be watching your cute behind for the first mile, then i'm sure you would be so far ahead of me i'd never see you again for a day or 2 while i caught up!!
What a deficit!! thats FANTASTIC!!
i am so proud of you..and so proud to call you friend!!
Hugs and love to you!!

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The Scale doesn't always get it right

Sunday, February 01, 2009

So here I am , standing on the scale, and you can clearly see from the expression on my face that I'm not happy.


I did my long run yesterday and really put my poor joints through Hell. I got up this morning, and for the second week in a row, saw a big gain after a hard workout. However do those Biggest Loser contestants do it??

So as of this morning, I've only lost 2.5 pounds in all of January. Not much of an accomplishment, huh? Well, that's why I'm glad I take my measurements every month.

So here I am, taking my measurements, and I look a lot happier, don't I? Please. None of you have taken your eyes off my taut, trim, magnificent tummy long enough to notice what my face looks like!


Well, according to my trusty little tape measure, I lost 9.75 inches last month, including two inches off of my waist, 2 1/2 inches from my hips, two inches off of my extra rolls. (I sooo look forward to the day that they are gone completely, and I don't have to talk about them anymore!)

Don't get discouraged is the scale doesn't love you. If you're working hard and living right, your body will change whether or not the scale acknowledges your efforts.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ZIRCADIA 2/11/2009 9:56PM


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MDMNINA 2/9/2009 12:42PM

    Congratulations on the inches! I will see you in early March at Disney World.

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50FITNFUN 2/8/2009 7:42AM

    emoticon9.75 is an impressive number! I know you are right about measurements -vs.- the scale, but I just can't seem to break away from the scale. Thankfully, I joined Curves last week and they track the measurements and the weight on a monthly basis. Perhaps in a few weeks the first official results will be good and I'll feel less of a need to get on the scale every day.

Keep up the great work! I enjoy the photos you added with your blog(and in general). You always keep it interesting!

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GOANNA2 2/6/2009 5:47PM

    Wow. You should be proud of the inches. At the moment I am too scared to use my tape measure as well... No I have lost 2cm off my waist since Christmas though.
Keep up the good work and we should really stay away from the scales.
Anna emoticon

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NEWSTART127 2/5/2009 3:06AM

    emoticonWAY TO GO on the major inches lost! That's awesome! emoticon

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HRDWLBY 2/3/2009 9:45PM

    Great going on the inches loss! I'm going to have to start doing the measurements again.


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TIME4JUDI 2/3/2009 3:07PM

    That is a LOT of inches! WooHoo!

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COLORADOTINK 2/2/2009 5:28PM

only lost 2 pounds, but inches away........................ emoticon

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    Yep don't trust those scales, they only give you grief!!

So glad the tape measure is registering all your hard work, there's nothing worse than working out and having nothing to show for it.

Keep on smiling


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KIMCATUS 2/1/2009 3:10PM

    You are so right sweetie!!! Sometimes we get so caught up in what the scale says we ignore all the other signs...good job on NOT ignoring those signs you hot skinny thang!! You're always so motivating and upbeat'll get there hon! Hang in there!!! *hugs*

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SHELEARNS 2/1/2009 2:30PM

    That's awesome! Congratulations! Good reminder too. I am off to do my weekly measurements and see if I've lost anything.

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AMUNET_RA 2/1/2009 1:08PM

    Yay! Congrats on the lost inches, Sweetie!! The scale always seems to be the last to know...


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MSEMBERSTORM 2/1/2009 12:51PM

    That is wonderful news! I am so very happy for you! That is great progress. Keep up the awesome work! How have you been feeling?

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RAVEN1025 2/1/2009 12:50PM

    Way to go on losing those inches!!! Sometimes it takes time for the scale to balance out. You are surely building some muscle, which will help burn off more fat. You are doing great!!!

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NIGHTSKYSTAR 2/1/2009 12:39PM

    ahhh and unfortunately the scale treats us both the same. i got on this am and was up again, after being down yesterday. so i'm going to check again now (hoping the diuretics have worked their magic) and if not i'm weighing tomorrow. i have worked my big butt to exhaustion all week and there is NO reason for no loss!!!
you are my hero!! you have a FANTASTIC attitude,,and you are right. my pants are looser. so i'm putting on MY big girl panties and forgetting that $#%@# scale!!

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    That is WONDERFUL news on the inches!! WOW!!!!! That totally deserves a big high five... emoticon (except that this guy is more like a high three or maybe a high four).

Way to not get discouraged with the scale numbers, and way to shout out your measurement losses! That is a huge encouragement to me, so thank you!!!

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    Great job on the inches lost. . thats fantastic!! I'm in the same boat as you on the weight loss front . . . . I busted my BEHIND this week, and maintained. Thats TWO WEEKS of maintain for me . . . *grumble* And for the month of January I only lost 3.75 inches. Definitely nothing to sneeze at . . . but still not the progress I'd like to be making.

Keep after it . . all that new found muscle you put on will step into high gear and get that weight off of you. . . . it just takes some reconfiguring!! :)

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COLEISMYSOUL 2/1/2009 10:28AM

    Great on the measurement losses! And especially going on your run. Have you tried the ben gay type creams before you go? You are going to great at that marathon. You will be the Queen - not the Princess!!!!!

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MAPLELEAFMOM 2/1/2009 9:20AM

    I agree you are looking fine !!!

You are so right about the scale. We really shouldn't put so much emphasis on it but it is hard to see past it some days. You are doing fantastic and the shrinking measurements are showing how hard you are working! Keep up the great work... you are a true inspiration to many of us emoticon

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QUEMBEL1 2/1/2009 9:15AM

    emoticonYour looking hot!

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