CATHY63RED   38,474
SparkPoints
30,000-39,999 SparkPoints
 
 
CATHY63RED's Recent Blog Entries

This one made me laugh

Sunday, October 07, 2012

The Frog and Rat

A drunk walks up to a barkeeper one day and says, "If I show you a trick will you give me a free drink?" The Barkeep says "Depends on how good of a trick it is."

The Drunk reaches into his pocket and pulls out a frog and places him behind the piano. The frog starts to play the sweetest jazz riff the barkeeper has ever heard. He pours the drunk his drink.

The drunk, after killing his drink says, "If I show you another trick can I have another free one?" The barkeep says "If it is anything like that last one, you can drink free all night." The drunk reaches into his other pocket, pulls out a rat, sets it on top of the piano, and the rat starts scatting along with the frog."

Impressed, the barkeeper starts to pour drinks as fast as the drunk can drink 'em. After several hours, a big time Hollywood agent walks in, sees the act and franticaly asks the barkeeper who it belongs to. The barkeeper points to the drunk who is passed out on the floor.

The agent wakes him up and says, "I will give you 1 Million dollars for that act." The drunks says "not for sale". The agent says, "Ok, 100 grand for just the scating rat." The drunk say, "deal" The agent writes the check and leaves with the rat.

The barkeeper looks at the drunk and says, "Are you nuts? You had a Million dollar act that you just broke up for a whimpy 100 g's?"

The Drunk says, "Relax, the frog is a vantriliqist"

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SONYALATRECE 10/7/2012 10:54AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WENDYJM4 10/7/2012 5:25AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ARTJAC 10/7/2012 2:37AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAGGIEVAN 10/7/2012 2:28AM

    Funny. Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SH9719 10/7/2012 1:50AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Curves Circuit

Friday, October 05, 2012

Wow I am excited. I had been a member at my local Contours for just over 12 months and they just closed down. So last weekend I went to the Curves at the next suburb. After 5 workouts today I burnt 702 calories in 30 minutes. At this rate I should start seeing some results

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 10/7/2012 2:40AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LJCANNON 10/6/2012 6:38PM

    emoticon That is a FABULOUS Burn!! Congratulations!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
WENDYJM4 10/6/2012 3:13AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


A joke to make you smile

Friday, October 05, 2012

A man moved to a new house. He thought he would get to know the locals and went to the pub near his home. He went in and sat at a stool and asked for a drink. In front of him was a jar of 10 cent coins, with a sign saying correct guess wins you the jar!!!
After about 10 beers he told the barman he was on his way home and the barman said seeing he was such a good customer he could have a free guess at the jar. The man had been thinking about an amount all night and replied with 206 dollars. The barman stood amazed and said, THAT"S CORRECT !!
How did you know how much was in there? The man said just a lucky guess, grabbed his jar of coins and staggered out and walked home.
As he walked up the front stairs of his house he tripped and the jar crashed to the patio and scattered the 2006 coins all over the place. He decided he would pick it up in the morning. He crept into the bedroom and without waking his wife went to sleep. Early next morning his wife came in all excited to wake him up yelling JOHN,JOHN..... You wont guess whats all over our patio?.... John opens his eyes and says calmly, Yeah I know..... 206 dollars in 10 cent coins......
NO!! she said.....
There is 200 liters of MILK !!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 10/7/2012 2:39AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WENDYJM4 10/5/2012 5:13AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAGGIEVAN 10/5/2012 4:54AM

    Very funny. Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVEROFJC 10/5/2012 3:30AM

  I wanted to laugh, but I didn't get it......maybe if I read it tomorrow I will. Thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
EBONYSOL 10/5/2012 2:46AM

    Good one!

Report Inappropriate Comment


For a Giggle

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

This really made me laugh hope you like it too!



Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!!
(true story)..


Scientists at Rolls Royce built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners and military jets all travelling at maximum velocity.


The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

American engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the Windshields of their new high speed trains.


Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the American engineers.

When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow..

The horrified Americans sent Rolls Royce the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the British scientists for suggestions.


You're going to love this......



Rolls Royce responded with a one-line memo:


"Defrost the chicken."


emoticon


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 10/7/2012 2:41AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISSELKEISINAUS 10/4/2012 2:16AM

    funny!!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARYJOANNA 10/3/2012 6:42AM

  Great! It takes all kinds!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBBIELCG 10/3/2012 6:20AM

    lets have a round of applause for the chickens.

Report Inappropriate Comment
AZTLAN777 10/3/2012 5:55AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NCSUE0514 10/3/2012 5:24AM

    LOL!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SPARKCHANTAL 10/3/2012 5:16AM

    you gotta be kidding

Report Inappropriate Comment


Impossible

Saturday, September 24, 2011

When you think impossible turn it around I'm Possible. You can do it!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 10/7/2012 2:41AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUSIEPH1 9/24/2011 6:32PM

    Woo Hoo !!Anything is Possible!!
Love and Hugs Susie emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Last Page