CARPEDIEM369   18,376
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CARPEDIEM369's Recent Blog Entries

OA (Overeaters Anonymous) Misses the Mark

Tuesday, August 06, 2013

I often wondered why OA wouldn't work for me & then I took a clear look @ the 12 Step format: Moral Inventory; Wrongs; Defects of Charactr; Making Amends; & Humbling One's self. WOWZA - this stuff is totally off base! A. It has nothing to do w/ me or my behavior & B. everything to do w/ what could possibibly be wrong w/ you as a person. Having a chemical imbalance in the brain doesn't remotely mean that your character is lacking in some way. Good Grief!

Am wondering if any of you have come across support groups (in person vs online) that use a different paradigm beyond this old AA model. If so, please share what is working for you.

I'm currently reading The Hunger Fix - check out one of her seminars here:


Compulsive vs Binge Eating Group/Support/Buddy?

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Today I'm looking for support concerning eating compulsively - this is different than binge eating. It's more like constant grazing.

Can't seem to find a group. How about a Buddy?



Weight Gain & Suicide

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Until yesterday, it hadn't really dawned on me before that I eat as a way to keep from thinking about killing myself. WOW! Interesting to see that I've been using food as a tool to stay safe - very skewed & counter-productive.

By February I had gotten down to 243 lbs (from 315 in 2011). But when I weighed in @ the doctor's office yesterday, I was @ 267 on her scale (260 on mine). +24 lbs in just 4 months is what made me realize that I was depressed - the weight gain vs actually being in touch w/ my emotions was my indicator. GOOD GRIEF!

Today I'll make an appointment to get back into counseling & see if I can get this turned around.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MELYMOUSE3 6/11/2013 9:57PM

    Isnt it amazing when we realize what it is that causes us to eat! Its like a giant light bulb went off emoticon ! I am so proud of you for facing your demons and understanding what your trials are. Great job on getting back into counseling and I will keep you in my prayers. You are beautiful and I can tell have a truly wonderful personality, never give up! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CARPEDIEM369 6/11/2013 2:31PM

    Many thanks for your kind thoughts, words, & concern! I didn't even realize that this depression was creeping up on me. Clearly I'm extremely out of touch w/ my emotions! I just phoned for a therapy appointment - ONWARD!

I hope that others who use food to keep from feeling or thinking about things that are upsetting them will chime in...

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PINKYYSUEE 6/11/2013 2:09PM

    So glad your seeking help! We want you to stay around!!

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NEELIXNKES 6/11/2013 1:49PM

    emoticon Glad that you came to the realization and are able/ready to seek help. Take care of you!

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Row, row, row your boat...

Sunday, September 25, 2011

O.k., I did NOT manage to walk in the 5K "Heart Walk" yesterday, which was really disappointing as it was a goal that I set for myself back in April. However, being in training for that has motivated me to lose 46 lbs. I'm also disappointed that I'm still having to use a walker, which I thought certainly, I would have been able to ditch by now. And, I'm not exactly thrilled that I'm still 14 lbs away from my original goal of losing 60 lbs by October 12th & there's no way that is gonna happen.

A kidney infection (I only have one kidney), got in the way of participating in the walk yesterday. However, I am volunteering (but not walking) today as a committee member for our "Hunger Walk," which benefits the local Food Bank. And, having lost nearly 50 lbs in the past 6 months is still pretty impressive.

Guess all-in-all, I'll give myself a emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LYNNKSMITH 12/20/2011 8:23PM

    You're doing great. I have a hard time not feeling bad when I don't meet my goals, but I'm learning to set smaller goals and I try to focus on my accomplishments.

emoticon for volunteering too!

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Losing Weight "On Purpose"...

Thursday, July 28, 2011

In 2002, I lived in Mexico for 6 months. On one ranch, there was no running water. On another ranch, there was no electricity. I weighed 306 lbs when I arrived & 6 months later, I was accidently nearly 50 lbs lighter. Silly me, without any mirrors, I didn't even realize that I was losing weight - I just thought that the elastic in my lingerie was wearing out!

My diet consisted mainly of potato chips, candy bars, and tortilla chips w/ salsa & guacamole. However, I was walking everywhere & doing a lot of physically demanding work.

To my way of thinking, losing that weight didn't count & anyway, when I returned to the USA, electricity & indoor plumbing, I gained it all back, plus 4 more pounds.

With the weight I'm losing since I've joined Spark People, every action is intentional & carefully planned out in the realm of nutrition and fitness. Its interesting to see the difference with losing weight "on purpose." This way, I actually get to take legitimate credit for every single pound I shed.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Keep it up..Wish you luck! emoticon emoticon

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TYME2BME 7/28/2011 9:58PM

    You should get credit because you are doing the work. But now you are doing it the healthy way and that is emoticon. Another thing is you are noticing this time you are losing weight. You are doing good. I hope you have lots and lots of successes and a fabulous journey.

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