Thursday, December 29, 2011
Had 2700 calories yesterday. At least I recorded them. Here is the deal. I did really well until 4pm. I was so hungry by then, and I found out that I wasn't going to have dinner until much later because of an unexpected visit from a relative. So, I was not in control, you see, of when I would eat or even what I would eat. (I had already planned a low calorie dinner for myself for 5:30 pm)
My hand arthritis made it impossible for me to continue working on the garden or working on my beaded earring project. I thought, "I can do an extra walk workout, that does not use my hands" I did four miles, but was totally exhausted and sweaty when I got home.
My mom is always lonely, and I had extra time. She has a brandy every day at 4pm with a little snack. So, I visited her and we had the brandy in beautiful new Waterford brandy snifters I gave her for her 94th birthday.
Then I had another brandy and ate all the snacks the caregiver gave us.
When I got home, I was still starving so ate crackers.
Jack and Patty came at 7pm, but the restaurant was absolutely packed. Even though it was a weeknight, people all have out of town visitors, as actually we did too. We did not get the food until 8:30. Well, I scarfed up the entire Mexican dinner (usually I don't)
I really do not see how I could have done anything differently yesterday. If I had had a large lunch, maybe I could have gone until 8:30 without all those snacks, but I doubt it.
Today is another new day.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Well, it is actually the Tuesday after, but feels like the Monday after a big weekend binge.
Having my mom's birthday party the day after Christmas like that was really hard on me. But since she is 94, who knows how many more there will be? My kids said, "mom, you said that last year"
I was totally exhausted, and then at 9:30 got a phone call from her, waking me up from a very deep sleep. She wanted to know if she had given the grandchildren the checks for Christmas. She and I had sat down and did Christmas gifts for everyone (a check) but for the last 2 days, every hour or so, she worries that she has not done it. She says she has no memory of it. Yet, she remembers other things. Very, very sad.
Monday, December 26, 2011
More eating today, because it is my mom's birthday, and we always have a party for her.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Of course I did not use the food tracker yesterday, being Christmas Eve. But again, I feel a sense of success. Why? It felt weird not to use the tracker. And as I was mindlessly putting homemade Christmas cookies into my mouth, I stopped and thought, "I don't even like these that much" It was like a sea change, I do not know how to explain it. I enjoyed my food, I did not pay attention to the calories, yet, I felt I was aware. Alive and aware.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Even though I had 2500 calories yesterday, my success is that I honestly recorded every single bite.
Previously, I had been only recording breakfasts, or maybe lunches, too, but almost always slacking off on dinners. Still, it was good to record at least half of what I ate. Now I feel I am on the road to honesty. There will be 1800 calorie days and 2500 calorie ones, but if I can firmly establish this habit, then maybe I can get to the 1500 calorie ones, which are the ones that will cause me to lose weight.
I have also developed the measuring habit. I noticed now each day, I measure a bit more. It is incremental. It slowly is developing.
Another success is that I finally got to morning exercise, using the Spark video. I could only do five minutes at first, but the next day I did ten, and the next a bit more. Again, this is incremental.
You do not go from never recording foods, to suddenly recording every single thing you eat. And you don't go from not exercising to suddenly doing hour long workouts!!
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