Monday, May 09, 2011
I got out a carton of ice cream and was waiting for it to melt. (I like it soft, it brings out the flavor) While I was waiting, I realized a banana would be just fine. So, I put the ice cream away, weighed the banana in grams, recorded it on Spark, and I feel so good!! I do not feel deprived. Later I had frozen yogurt with my 93 year old mom as a mothers day treat and we each shared so it was very light.
Saturday, May 07, 2011
Very happy with how I ate yesterday. Feel like I can get back to better eating. I actually felt hungry!! (in a good way) That is something I did not experience on vacation!!! It was like going from one meal to the next without a break!!
Friday, May 06, 2011
Well, today, is May 6, and it seems like a long time away from Spark. I am okay with it, but I gained 2 pounds on my vacation in Yosemite. The problem is these restaurants give you food that is too much, and on vacation you cannot save it. I guess ordering from the "starters" section is the only way to cut down. So, now I have to return to my sparking, and I am further reinforced with the idea of how much it helps. Being away from Spark shows me how much it actually helps.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
I went to an all day seminar on this topic yesterday, designed for nurses, therapists, etc. I learned how habits are unconscious. The teacher was a neuroscientist from Stanford and she explained how the brain makes these pathways. and will power really cannot do it. The way to change a habit is to surround yourself with people who have the habits that you want to have. Spark is excellent for this purpose, but there is no face to face contact. I wonder if I should join Weight Watchers?
The seminar was all day, so I can't really explain it all here. I knew about the unconscious, but the science of how the brain makes these pathways was startling to me, and kind of depressing at the same time. With foods, I learned you really have to substitute. You cannot just use will power to say you are giving up candy. It does not work. (well, we all know that, don't we?)
Sunday, April 24, 2011
I had my own family dinner last night because today I am going to my fiancee's family dinner today. It is getting harder and harder for me to do things like these dinners. Even with people helping, setting the table, getting the extra chairs out, putting, all the dishes away, it just borders on overwhelming.
It is a shame. My oldest daughter could not come because her depression has her feeling too bad to get out. But my mom was in great shape and we did have some family laughs. It is very hard to see the end of a 40 year tradition, but I see it ending. My younger daughter and husband and baby stayed overnight--Easter egg hunt for the one year old was cute . I feel let down now that they have left. I loved my life when I had a family. It is peaceful now, but hard to live alone now. I have not been doing Spark, I feel like giving up, on not just Spark, but everything. All my life I have tried too hard. Too hard. It is deeply depressing to have a mentally ill child who is almost 40. These are not good Easter thoughts. But they will change. Easter is a potent symbol for that fact.
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