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Goal weight – who do I need to convince.

Friday, February 01, 2013

A goal weight is hard to define. At 145lbs, 2lbs from now, I will be in the healthy BMI range. So I should be happy there – right?

But I have been down to 143lbs but didn’t stay there? Why? Because I was not happy with my body! I knew that I still carried a lot of fat, especially around my middle area. So looking back I now realise that I was in a way disappointed that having reached my goal weight I still was not happy! That unhappiness and confusion led to not having any clear plan on what to do from then on, which of course led to gaining weight again!

So am I ever going to be happy with my body at any weight? And why do I not want to go under 140lbs which I now realise I need to. I have been fooling myself that I have a big frame when actually I haven’t!!

The thing is that I know that if I go under 140lbs, I am going to get far more of the ‘oh you are too thin’ or ‘don’t lose any more or you will look terrible’ type comments (I already get them, I just know I will get more)

But I have now given myself permission to go below 140lbs. I am not going to take to heart any negative comments I get. I will see them for what they are. They don’t have to live in my body, I do. I have no wish to be sick or sickly looking. I eat far healthier when I am trying to lose weight as I try to make every calorie count! I hate wasting calories on junk!

So I am going to decide for myself when I am happy with my weight and it is not where I am at now. And my plan – to keep eating sensibly and healthily and exercising regularly, including ST! I am going to take it one step at the time and I will know when I get there!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BOOKWORM27S 4/10/2013 10:42AM

    This is a very good question. For me... I find it to be a slippery slope of trying to reach perfection in my mind. Right now, I'm concentrating on my BMI, which is currently 20.0. I'm 5'5" and I have a medium build. I know as long as I don't go under a BMI of 18.5, then my body will find its comfort weight.

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POOKIEIAM 2/13/2013 9:43PM

    BMI is a good indicator that you're in the right zone, but by no means is it a rule that you need to go by in deciding where you feel happy weightwise, but especially appearancewise. Also, the BMI recommended range is so broad that you have a lot of wiggle room to be on the low end or high end and still be considered "healthy".

At the end of the day, there will always be those people who sabotage in order to make themselves feel better. You've lost this weight FOR YOURSELF, keep going by how you feel comfortable.

I'm at 155 lbs right now with a goal of 138 lbs - but that goal weight is just a number that made a perfect 50lbs weight loss. It may be I'll be comfortable at 145, or it may be I'll only be comfortable when I get to 120 lbs.. I really don't know other than the last time I was a size 6, I was 135lbs... but I was also 20 years old.

I think that to know where you and I will end up feeling comfortable, we will need to try it for size! Unless you are having obsessive or excessive behaviour, finding your happiness in weighloss is perfectly OK in my book. Keep at it!

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PIPSANDMSMAMA79 2/13/2013 4:36PM

    Yes! You are the one that lives in your body and as long as you feel healthy and are eating right and excersizing I don't see why losing a bit more weight could hurt. You're doing great. Its your life, live it how you want to emoticon

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SKEEWEE2MEK 2/4/2013 3:38PM

    Only you know what feels right for your body. Sounds like you have a good handle on what you want to accomplish. emoticon

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KANOE10 2/3/2013 10:51AM

    Good luck figuring out your goal weight. I reached mine and then went down lower. Good for you ignoring the negative comments people will make. Stay positive and figure out where you are happiest.

Great job of getting into the normal BMI. emoticon

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    It is so much more than the # on the emoticon This is a lifestyle and a journey not a diet with a definitive # to reach and be DONE. How do you feel? And self perception and body image is so difficult. What we really need to pursue and hold fast to when we capture the elusive is self love inside and out. You ARE beautiful inside and out no matter what that fluctuating # on the scale reads. Your children want you fit and healthy and happy and THAT is what is most worth attaining! Love your smile! emoticon

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ROCKMAN6797 2/2/2013 10:49PM

    Great really is about making better lifelong choices. As I love to keep in mind, this is not a diet rather it is a lifestyle change, one that has provided me with better health and clearer thinking. You have got this!


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RSTM99 2/2/2013 10:54AM

    I think that's why maintenance, after we attain whatever number on the scale we strove for, is SO hard. What is the plan, how to keep on track? I also struggle with 'if I'm not trying to lose, I'm gaining' I think I like the structure of my day - good food, workouts - when I'm in lose mode and otherwise it's a free for all :)

I like how you noted it's about giving yourself permission - whatever your goal, however you get there, it is about making that decision for yourself.

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JAYMELYNN5 2/1/2013 5:10PM

    I'm right there with you!! Everyone is so negative, you look so old when you lose weight....I'm kickin' 151 right now (skinny my butt)!!! LOL!! My goal is 140.... GOOD LUCK !! emoticon

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BLUE42DOWN 2/1/2013 4:55PM

    It can be especially hard to define when variances in body composition can make the exact same body look drastically different. What you want is less excess body fat and more muscle / tone, not a particular number on the scale - so find ways to measure that specifically rather than worrying purely about the scale.

Focusing too much on the scale number when you're close to "it" (goal weight / ideal weight) can lead to behaviors that make our bodies destroy muscle tissue rather than use up excess fat.

Also ... be very careful about body expectations. Even those who are not anorexic can sometimes have trouble with the mirror image and seeing only the flaws rather than seeing the overall picture. Expecting a flat or concave abdomen may not be realistic. Expecting an hourglass figure / very narrow waist may not be realistic. Expecting to see no cellulite may be unrealistic (even skinny people can have it). Expecting to look like a 21-year-old airbrushed model is definitely unrealistic. This doesn't mean we want to keep a spare tire around our middle that's an extra three inches to pinch, but I've seen people who fuss over not feeling their bones distinctly or the excess skin that takes a long time to adjust to the smaller body.

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TIFFA409 2/1/2013 4:52PM

    May I ask how tall you are? Some of the negative comments you are receiving may just be jealousy on their part. They were more comfortable being the "thin" friend and now that role is yours. Or perhaps you making changes in your health is making it obvious that they have not. Don't let the negative comments get you down. I would say worry about being "too thin" if you start to approach the bottom end of your healthy BMI. Congratulations on your success! Enjoy basking in the maintenance stage once you have arrived in your "happy weight"!!!

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    This may sound harsh. And in this case I think it may need to be. But it is also coming from experience. A number on the scale should not be your only way of measuring where you are. When I was younger I weighed around 150.That is a perfectly healthy weight for me to be at. However, I was still "fat". I had pudge around the middle and really thick thighs. My problem wasn't that I was overweight. It was that I was unhealthy. Eating Junk all the time and only drinking soda. I also very rarely exercised. I didn't need to lose weight. Although, if I had started to exercise I would have probably lost weight anyway. I was pretty comfortable in my skin though and I didn't think I would ever get fat. Anyway, my point is; it is all in perception. Maybe there are other things about your life that you don't like and are projecting those onto your self image. Don't go by the number on the scale. Go by how fit you are. If you are fit and have energy you will be happy.
Best of Luck!!!

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CEEMAY 2/1/2013 3:54PM

    I think finding a goal weight is difficult because we are each so different. I have set a goal weight for myself having no idea if that will be "it" or not. My MAIN concern is feeling my best through being healthy. Good luck to you!


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Reflections on where I am and where I want to be!

Sunday, January 27, 2013

I am just jotting down some ideas on how I expect my life to change for the better when I get to my goals:

I will be running a 5k in less than 30 mins.

I will be aiming for a 10k

I will be running in local 5k runs without caring who sees me.

I will have the energy to do anything I want to do

I will buy clothes, not because I like them and decide to buy them in a smaller size (as I don’t feel like this is my ‘right’ size!) but because they fit me well no matter what size they are. Clothes size will no longer define who I am.

I will be happy with my size. I have realised that I have been near my weight goal before but was not happy as it was not a weight I felt good at. I now have accepted and am happy that my goal weight should be lower.

I will be exercising because I want to not because I feel I have to.

But I think that in order to move forward one has to forgive themselves for failures in the past. We need to forgive, learn from and move on.

I forgive myself that in two years I have only lost a net of 9lbs. What I really need to forgive myself is for the fact that I have lost much more than that but have put it back on at least four times in that time! That frustrates me and annoys me and makes me feel I must be the most inconsistent, stupid person on the planet!

So today, I am starting at the only place I can – where I am at now. Time to forget that I have been 7lbs lighter at least twice in the past year! I am going to concentrate on what I have achieved in that two years. The main achievement is that I can now run a 5k!! Two years ago, I hadn’t even thought about running!!

Time to move on!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FEB_SHOWERS16 1/30/2013 8:19AM

    Great blog and wonderful goals! emoticon

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EMMAEKAY 1/28/2013 2:43PM

    The best thing about the past is that you've PASSED it! Treat today as brand new and move forward.

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AHTRAP 1/28/2013 2:34PM

    Decent, achievable goals. Good attitude on realizing that what's past is gone, and making that decision to concentrate on what you can now do. Good fortune making those goals reality!

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ROCKMAN6797 1/27/2013 3:06PM

    Nice blog, I love the attitude and look forward to reading about your future 5Ks!
You got this!


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STEVIEBEE569 1/27/2013 1:05PM

    You can do it! emoticon

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SUGARSMOM2 1/27/2013 12:39PM

  yes you can and will be successful with these goals . life is wonderful . live it to the fullest .

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TWEETYKC00 1/27/2013 10:57AM

    You can and you will! Go for your goals!

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APRILLPHILLIPS 1/27/2013 10:55AM

    Great attitude!!!

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I nearly didn’t do it!

Saturday, May 12, 2012

I had lots of excuses – and very good ones as well – not the usual, I just don’t feel like it, it is too cold or it is raining!

I have to exercise around my kids schedule. So when they have activities I can do my 5k training.

Saturday’s they are supposed to have swimming and dance class. I usually do my grocery shopping during swimming and do my run while they are at dance class. However, dance class was cancelled today, leaving a gap in my plan! And Sat morn was going to be the only time for the whole weekend that I wouldn’t have the kids. I knew I could do things like skipping or a DVD with them but I wouldn’t be able to finish my 5k training week!

I was toying with the idea of doing my run while they were swimming , but I had stopped doing that before as there was always dogs on the loose in that area and not very nice ones! Then last night I had the idea of driving half a mile away to where it is a safer neighbourhood.

Woke up this morning to a lovely sunny morning and was looking forward to my run. But whatever happened on my way to swimming – I had lots of excuses by the time I got there!

My hip was very sore, I wouldn’t have time to fit in driving a distance and getting in my run and being back in time to help my daughter get changed and I couldn’t think of an appropriate place to do it.

I dropped them and got back in the car, knowing in head that I really had no notion of doing it. I was in the process of mentally preparing a list of what other errands I could do when I spotted them!

Yes – two ladies out jogging. They will never know they just inspired someone but just then I knew I had to do the run! Even if I was not back on time, my daughter is so independent that she does not like help and she does it by herself at her school swimming classes anyway. I need to nurture her independent streak and not stifle it. That was never a good excuse!!

I also badly did not want to give up on my 5k training. I have a habit of giving up if things are not going to plan!!

The end result – I parked the car and just got out and ran! The feeling of not wanting to do it gradually disappeared and at the end my Nike app told me I had completed my fastest mile time to date!!! Was I so glad I did it! 3.14 miles in 31.50 minutes!!!

So going back to my first sentence about having good excuses – scratch that, they were quiet bad ones!!

Lessons learnt:
1) You never know when you are being an inspiration
2) Excuses are never as good as you think (actually excuses are the lies we tell ourselves)
3) Never put off until later what you can do now, something can come in the way of doing it later.

Have a great week-end everyone!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHRISTINASP 12/10/2012 5:00AM

    Nice blog!
Who knows, maybe YOU inspired someone too!

Comment edited on: 12/10/2012 5:01:22 AM

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SUNRISE14 5/23/2012 6:20AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticonTHANK YOU FOR JOINING GOD ANSWERS PRAYER TEAM ! emoticon

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SUNSHINEGIRL311 5/19/2012 11:38AM

  Thank for sharing you have inspired me. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LITAPOWER 5/17/2012 1:04PM

    Thank you, I need inspiration, it is so easy to give up!

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MICROGIRLIE 5/13/2012 2:24AM

    Goods work! I even made my parents go for a walk today. It was windy on the beach, but lovely walking by the sea.
Happy mothers day to you!

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BERKCHIK 5/12/2012 3:14PM

    Holy smokes, you just inspired me!!! emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/12/2012 3:15:14 PM

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TIKTOCK 5/12/2012 12:33PM

    That's great! Really makes me want to get back into running again!

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FUNMAMASPARK 5/12/2012 11:15AM

    Great job!

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VIXSTERLU 5/12/2012 10:37AM

    Proud of you girl!!!

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What happened??

Monday, April 23, 2012

Friday was fantastic - I was really doing well. I was already down two pounds for the week though my weigh in was not until Monday. I only had to maintain for the weekend, and I had planned lots of exercise for the weekend which would surely make maintaining easy!

I had got up, baked healthy brown grain rolls for my kids for their lunch. I had cooked them cookies as Friday is a day they are allowed a treat for school. To avoid problems with the cookies, I halved the recipe and only cooked ten. I brought three to work as I was going to allow myself one and give one each to the two others in the office.

While baking, I did 15 mins and 500 jumps on my skipping rope in the kitchen.

Got to work and all still went to plan - had my one cookie and was fine with that.
My boss (who we are convinced is a ‘feeder’) had come back from a trip and brought a box of chocolate covered macadamia nuts for each of us in the office. I resisted opening them.

In the evening while my kids were at music lessons I ran/walked 3.3 miles in 35 minutes which is just over a 5k. I felt fantastic!!! Nothing was going to stop me now! Or was there something?

Yes- the box of chocolates – kids in bed, husband away, box of chocolate coated nuts and a bottle of wine. The rest as they say is history and so was my whole weekend!

The icing on the cake was that on Sat my kids dancing classes were cancelled, which was to give me an hour of walking/jogging. Added to that was a weekend of wind and rain!!

Four pounds up this morning, disgusted with myself, but I am not logging that weight because if I do I think I will give up. I will wait until Wed as it can’t be real – I def didn’t eat that much as I don’t keep rubbish in the house any more so I didn’t have the opportunity. But I did over eat and I did zero exercise as I was too tired!

Hopefully lesson learned. This is where I normally would fail and hide away with some more food! But I am trying to drag myself back this morning and I know I will!

Need to make a more definite plan – times etc for exercising. Off to do that now.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RIGHTONJEN 11/7/2012 6:53AM

  When I read looked like I wrote this. Similar existence. I don't want to back track. Or, rather, I can't allow myself to back track this time. I am desperate to move forward.

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BERKCHIK 5/1/2012 7:13PM

    This is an incredibly inspirational blog post, if you ask me. You had one of those days we all have. I had one last Saturday, so Sunday was the hardest day ever--getting back on track is a bitch!

But this seriously inspires me because I feel more connected and less alone. If you gave up, I hope you'll get back on this week. I'd love to see what you're up to...even if it's grazing and lazing!

Best, emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/1/2012 7:13:34 PM

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SKATER787 4/24/2012 1:11AM

    If you can't beat them, you might as well enjoy them. Next time just have one or the other. Just a thought. emoticon

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KASPARFAN 4/23/2012 9:54AM

    Just one of probably many bumps in the road! We're all bound to give in to temptations occasionally. But you can recover from this! You got this, girl! emoticon

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MICROGIRLIE 4/23/2012 7:16AM

    Wine and chocolate! That classic evil combination! Essential, but hard to moderate!
Happens to all of us, and its ok to blw out once in a while!

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TWEETYKC00 4/23/2012 5:32AM

    It's ok, these things happen to all of us. Get back up, brush yourself off and start moving again!

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Motivational Quote

Thursday, April 19, 2012

"Simple kindness to one's self and all that lives is the most powerful transformational force of all."

— Dr. David Hawkins: is a psychiatrist, physician, researcher, and pioneer in the fields of consciousness research and spirituality

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AHMARROSE 4/19/2012 10:37PM


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MARATHONDAD 4/19/2012 9:04AM

    very nice

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