Friday, November 04, 2011
Hey, Esther. It's time we had a little talk.
Look, I get it...2011 was a rough year. You didn't lose a lot of weight and, for some reason, you want to count 2011 as a failure because of it. But I need you to stop that thinking right now. Seriously! RIGHT NOW!
All the time you groan when you hear other people talk about how far they've come and you think, "They've done better than me." Stop sulking! Don't you realize what you've accomplished? Don't you realize just how amazing you are?
Yesterday you spent almost an hour talking to a coworker you used to have very little in common with about, of all things, weight loss and fitness. This girl is much smaller than you. This should be totally easy for her. That's what you told yourself, anyhow. For some reason you got it in your head that you should be jealous of her because her path seemed so much easier. But, after talking to her, you realize that your struggles are so similar to hers it's eerie. You realize that she struggles with healthy choices just as much as you do. And you discovered that while she triumphs in areas you have yet to even attempt, you have things you do that still inspire her, things you've accomplished that she still fears. You're sitting in different boats, but they look just the same and while she's paddling mostly on the left side, and you mostly on the right, you're still headed in the same direction.
What's more...you actually let yourself be vulnerable in front of her yesterday. You admitted some of your failings and, to your surprise, she didn't smirk or laugh or gloat. She shared some of hers with you instead. And when she mentioned her inability to complete 30-Day Shred but her desire still to do it, you found a common connection and out popped the words, "Let's do it together!" Maybe you didn't expect her to take the bait. Maybe you expected her to back out so you felt you were safe in offering. But you knew there was that chance she would say yes. And she said yes...sorta. You see, like you she struggles with her body rebelling against what she wants. She told you reasonably, "I have to wait until my appointment Monday and see what's going on, but if I get the all clear, we're on."
So, it's out there. And you put it there. A December challenge of 30-Day Shred every single day for 30 days to round out 2011 with a bang. You immediately tried to bail on it. "Do you have to work out EVERY SINGLE DAY?! I like my rest days!!" But you walked away knowing that if she came back and said she got the all clear, you would do it...because you can do anything for 30 days. And because girls struggling together have to stick together!
I also want you to remember that yesterday you threw away half a piece of cake. You didn't want it. You tried to resist. You felt it was forced upon you and you used that excuse, but you still could've said no. Yeah, I got all that. You took the piece of cake. But you shouldn't beat yourself up over that. Instead, you should rejoice in the restraint you had to take the smallest piece, to eat only half throughout the course of an entire afternoon and to throw it away once you realized that the concentrated sugar in it was actually making you feel sick.
Do you know why it made you sick, Esther? Don't you see? You don't indulge in high sugar sweets all day every day like you once did. Sure, a piece of chocolate here, a piece of chocolate there, but you aren't the sugar queen you once were. You can't polish off half a sheet cake over the course of 2 days anymore because your body knows now what's good for it...and knows that cake isn't one of those things. Even the people at work joke about how you're going to get a sugar rush every time sweets are offered because they know that your diet isn't full of sugar. And when you watch them eat one or two pieces of cake and then wash it down with a Coke, you have to realize that you used to be right there next to them, joining in, downing another piece and reaching for another soda.
Did you control your calories 100% yesterday? Nope. Is that a reason to call yesterday a failure? Hell no! Don't you remember that you struggled over whether to go out to eat or not? Don't you remember that when you ordered your very favorite meatball sub, that you ate half and then waited - yes, waited - to see if you wanted any more? And you did want more. And you ate almost the entire thing. And then you stopped when you were done. You may have eaten more than your plan "allowed," but you didn't walk out of there in pain (like the Hubs did) from overeating. You left there full and satisfied and then went home and indulged in a nice, quiet bath.
You've spent your whole life being a planner. You have to-do lists that tell you that you need to make a to-do list. That's who you've always been. But who you also are is the girl that veers off the to-do list at least 3 times a week or more. What you learned this year, somehow, is how to veer off gracefully. How to substitute items so you could remain productive. Or, if you veered off completely, how to find your way back on track. That's such a valuable skill to have learned because you need to make the plan work for you if you want it to work for your life. Sure, there are things you can change about yourself - lots of things - but developing things that work around the essence of who you are and the habits you have is the key to maintaining a healthy way of life...and a more peaceful one at that.
Last night you actually spoke the words, "I'm in a good place right now." And you believed them. You really ARE in a good place right now...a place where you understand more who you are and what you want and how to go about merging those two things.
This year you learned how to alter childish fantasies into achievable realities. You are not going to be a ballerina, but you can shape your body into a flexible, dynamic, and powerful work of art. You are never going to have a good relationship with your father (or any relationship, for that matter), but you can develop and foster the relationships you do have and pull those you love closer to you. You are not going to be the stick thin girl that can eat everything she wants, but you can be a healthy, fit, and strong woman that eats whatever she wants in moderation, learning to fit it into your life so that you can still enjoy the things you love to eat without sacrificing the things you love to do. You'll never be the perfect mother, but you can shower your children with love, teach them responsibility, and mold them into healthy, successful young men...and then realize that you have to let them go and do what they're going to do with the lessons you've taught them.
You labeled this year "The Year of Adventures: Finding My Bliss" but you never realized how difficult the journey would be to discovering your true self...a true self you've kept locked inside in order to fit into the expectations of others. For 29 years you sacrificed who you are for who people wanted you to be. You tried (and so often failed) to constantly keep them happy. You did what they wanted, followed their dreams for you, and let their expectations of your future be your guide for what your life would become. But this year you finally broke free of that prison. You allowed yourself to say no when it didn't feel right, to sacrifice being the one that constantly made them happy so that you could have some happiness of your own. You let yourself be you without bowling them over, cutting them down, or pushing them away and you've come out of it a person who "Is more sure of herself than she ever has been before." (You've never spoken truer words, by the way.)
So stop telling everyone that this year sucked. Stop telling them it was a massive failure. Stop selling yourself short because you know that the world will do that for you enough times in your life.
Rejoice in the person you've come to love. - Yourself.
Rejoice in your accomplishments.
May I please remind you that since April of last year you have lost over 110 pounds!?
May I remind you that you've somehow battled your way out of the high 400's and are nearing the 200's with consistency?
May I remind you that you have trained yourself to become a runner, like you once told yourself you could?
Keep remembering the day you challenged your expectations. You may not remember the exact date or even the year, but you remember that still small voice in your head asking, "Well why CAN'T you be the girl that gets up and runs 5 miles? Who said you can't do that?"
Tomorrow I want you to wake up and be that girl. You can now because you've trained yourself to be. You've fought through injury, illness, and heartbreak. You've fought through the sheer pain of pushing a 300-pound body through the limits that most people would have placed upon it. Sometimes you think to yourself, "I shouldn't be able to do this." But you realize time and time again that you can. Should doesn't factor in. Impossible is just a word that people use when they're scared to imagine what they're capable of.
Tomorrow I want you to put on your running gear, find a safe place to run that inspires you, pack a water bottle or two for the road, and take off running. Five miles is the goal, and even if you can't make it. Even if your legs give out and you feel like puking at mile 2. Even if you realize that it's too soon, your body isn't ready, and you aren't able to make it. The one thing I do NOT want standing in your way is the mental word "impossible." Break the mental barrier and let your body take over. It will either be ready for it, or it won't, but you will never know what it's capable of if you refuse to allow it the freedom to surprise you.
And when the mental battle begins, I want you to remember a few things...
1. Run for the person you once were, who didn't think it was possible.
2. Run for the girl that once had a moment of brilliance and challenged those expectations.
3. Run for the little girl that was put into a box in the corner and denied love and friendship by the people that were supposed to give it freely...and then continued to repeat that by withholding love for herself from herself.
4. Run for the days when you felt like running but couldn't due to injury.
5. Run for your bruised toes and ugly toenails.
6. Run for the people who told you somewhere down the line that 300-pound people weren't built to run.
7. Run for the 200's you're about to see.
8. Run for a year full of surprises, both good and bad.
9. Run for the girl who is "more sure of herself than ever before."
10. Run for the woman who is in a good place in her life right now.
11. Run for your sister, who has the skill necessary to do so, but constantly battles a body that actually does rebel no matter how hard she resists.
12. Run for your grandmother, who, you know, would not be surprised at how well you're doing, but who would smile at you and simply tell you, "You done good."
13. Run for a grandfather who never stopped protecting you in his own way.
14. Run for your uncle, who can barely walk sometimes.
15. Run for the children who already believe that expectations can be expanded, broken, and pushed to the limit.
16. Run for the husband who never really saw it coming and, yet, somehow, always knew it would and always stood by you.
17. Run for the freedom of it all.
18. Run for the wind in your hair.
19. Run for the sweat that's earned because you're fit and active, not cast upon you by rolls of fat.
20. Run for your beautiful legs that are taking shape before your very eyes.
And if, for some reason, your body isn't ready to handle it. If, for some reason, you realize that you need to stop. Do not, for one second, think of it as a failure. Know that you are steps closer every day to that one question you posed so long ago...the one question that tipped the scales in your favor and made you believe in impossible dreams. "Why can't I be the girl that runs 5 miles?" Truth is, you can. It may take time. You may not get there tomorrow. But you know that you will get there. Because you started this as a girl who couldn't run 1/4 of a mile. You fought your way to a girl who couldn't run 1/2 a mile. You triumphed into a girl who couldn't run a mile. You battled the pain of a girl who couldn't run two miles. And you ran into the girl who could run 3.5 without a single break.
Challenge expectations - your own and the world's.
Challenge the word "impossible" - because it's just a word.
Challenge the image the world forced upon you - and you were stupid enough to buy into.
This isn't about weight loss right now. Tomorrow isn't about numbers on the scale or the perfect body. It's about becoming who you were born to be. It's about coming back to the 3 and 4 year old you who never stopped running, jumping, playing - who never wanted to come inside because the world was filled with so much wonder and walls just seemed to block it all out. Let that little girl run for you. And, no matter what the outcome, thank yourself when you're done for the effort, the time you put in, the journey you've face, battled, and overcome.
Let that small voice in your head take over and consume you. The one you've been hiding for years. The one that you forced down with two words that seemed so overpowering - Can't and Impossible. Those two words that seemed so big, but are merely words with no definite meaning. Let that voice ring out. You know the one. The one that I imagine has on pink boxing gloves, a sports bra, running compression pants, and a gold medal of victory. The one that says, "Oh YES. I can. Just watch me."
And realize, finally and forever, that this year has built your character into something you can be proud of. A mother who teaches her children healthy habits. A wife who doesn't sacrifice herself for her husband, but who, through supporting herself, has the power and willingness to support him through his trials as well. The daughter who realizes the power of the love her mother never stopped giving, and who is willing, ready, and able to give it back in spades over and over again. The sister who will always follow an accidental early morning phone call with a text that ensures that everything is alright and realizes that if, for some reason, that sister says no, she will drop everything and come to her aid. The woman that is defiant in all the best ways, persistent and relentless and determined. The woman who, finally after 30 years, has learned to love herself for who she is no matter how much she weighs, the size of her jeans, the color of her hair, the blemishes on her face. The writer. The seeker of truth and advocate for justice. The woman who is able to rejoice in her accomplishments without letting them turn her into a self-righteous know-it-all.
The streets are not paved with gold. The road is not easy. But for every rock, cobblestone, or section of cement your persistent and defiant foot hits, you are leaving behind the doubts and forging your way into a future that you created.
And, finally, I want to say two simple words to you....
Thank you for finally allowing me to be heard.
Thank you for not stuffing me down again with boxes of chocolate and doubts fed to you through years of abuse.
Thank you for finally standing up and deciding to fight.
We can and will do this. Together. And it will be our greatest accomplishment to date, but not our greatest ever because we're starting to realize that we can be more than we ever imagined. Let's get going. We've got a lot of work ahead of us, but we have all the tools we need and all the courage to succeed if we just keep fighting together.
Thursday, November 03, 2011
I'm starting to think adding in Thursday rest days were perhaps the greatest idea I've ever had. I was SO excited when I woke up this morning to feel like I had the freedom to just enjoy my day without rushing around to get everything in. All I have to do is keep my eating in check today and I should be alright.
What's better about rest days? The days before. Knowing I have that "break" coming up sometimes makes me drag myself to my workouts. Last night I reminded myself, "It's okay to be tired and worn out today. Just push through...you can rest tomorrow. You'll have a whole day to heal before you need to come back to the gym again." And I did push through.
My phone informed me that last night was Speedwork. Yes, I set my workouts like appointments on my phone. Dr's appointment - I get an alert. Kid's school event - I get an alert. Workout scheduled - I get an alert. This alert told me that I needed to do at least 5 intervals at 5.3 speed. The goal was set and even though I felt completely exhausted (it's crazy how this always hits on the way home...when I'm struggling between the cozy couch awaiting me at the house and the gym...and I always know which one will make me feel better. Thankfully, last night I chose correctly.)
I ignored the squeak of the ghetto treadmill. (Seriously, my gym needs to majorly revamp some things as they've raised the cost in the past year but the maintenance and, well, general quality of the machines is degrading.)
I ignored my legs telling me they were tired. (Tired, not hurt.)
I ignored whether there might be anyone there watching me. (Who cares!?)
5 minutes of warm-up at 3.2
60 second interval at 5.3
90 second interval at 4.2
(repeat until you've done 5 intervals of each)
5 minutes of cooldown at 3.2-3.4
Total Time: 22 1/2 minutes
Total Distance: 1.5 miles
The way I felt? It varied from tired, to exhausted, to exhilerating, to proud. I was a little amazed how much more "comfortable" (I use the term very loosely) 5.3 speed is now. In fact, I thought about doing a 90 second interval of 5.3 the first time around, but I knew I needed to save it for the last few intervals (and, boy, did I ever!)
I followed that workout with a LONG stretch afterward. I could feel my body craving it, and I obliged.
So, why, oh why, did I get a horrible cramp down my entire left leg late last night? Oh, boy...I think it's time for some research because, let's face it, I'm not the biggest fan of bananas. And I know that being dehydrated can cause cramping, but I had 3 of my 32 oz bottles of water yesterday! I was hydrated! I guess, if I'm going to continue at this pace, I'm going to need to start paying attention to getting the RIGHT fuel (like things with potassium).
BTW - I just found this article. Apparently, cramps are not just a mystery to me.
(I am seriously considering what kind of massaging I can do for my muscles on my off days, though. Maybe one of those foam rollers or tennis ball tricks... *shrug*)
All I know is that my leg hurt (mostly on the inside muscle and mostly in my thigh area), from the hip all the way down. This was after some cramps in my foot a few minutes earlier. I couldn't move and couldn't stop screaming. Hubs was trying to help...he was talking to me calmly, telling me to stand up, all while I'm screaming at him, "Get away from me! It HURTS!!" (I'm a friggin' BABY when I get these but OMG the pain and loss of control just about kills me!) He finally tried the old tried and true method of comparing me to an athlete. "You need to stretch it out...that's what all the football trainers do for the players when they get them." I didn't want to comply. I told him I did NOT want to move it (sometimes moving it makes it actually cramp MORE). Eventually he walked away and I took his advice and stretched out my leg and the pain subsided a bit...and then the muscle twitching started. You could've seen it from a mile away, my leg basically bouncing up and down as my muscle twitched and me powerless to stop it. Finally, Hubs came back and yelled at me to "Get the F up!" and grabbed my hands and pulled me up. (He later apologized for the yelling and said, "Well, the talking calmly wasn't helping so I tried a different approach. I just didn't want to see you hurting anymore.") Know what? I felt much better. The cramp and twitching was gone. *shrugs*
So, yeah. I need a rest day.
Easy Run + Circuit Training + Speedwork doesn't seem like an impossible equation. I didn't struggle much through the actual exercises or feel my form failing because I was overly tired. I think, with time, I'll get more used to it. But I also think that this Thursday rest day right after all that is PERFECT!
And I'm already making mental plans on how to spend today, too.
Of course, I need to write. It's NaNo time and I WILL reach my 50k goal! So, today it's 2k words or more before I leave work, and then make sure everything is saved and backed up and sent home so I can work on it this weekend.
Because it's my Friday here at work, I'm going to make sure everything is cleared from my desk so I have nothing left over for Monday. I love to start the week with a clean slate. This shouldn't take very long considering my workload is kinda light right now.
I'm going to stretch today. I don't know if I'm going to set out to do any actual yoga routine, but I will try to make it a point to walk around a bit, stretch out, and keep my body loose.
I need some relaxation time so I'm thinking tonight would be the perfect night for a bath. I have a book to finish up and plenty more awaiting me, so I can soak and read and take care of my body and soul at the same time.
As for dinner? OMG, I'm totally stumped. I don't have anything on the schedule for tonight and most of my meat is in the freezer. I don't even remember if we have brown rice for Tofu Fried Rice. Honestly? I want to go out for dinner, but I know I shouldn't. I'm already meeting a friend for lunch today (no big, Subway and I'm planning a salad because I really want bunches of veggies in my belly!) so I shouldn't plan 2 outings in one day. Plus, because I'm not working out today I need to make sure I stay in check with my calories. I don't want to waste the hard work I put in this week! That being said, I still haven't decided whether to cook at home or go out, and/or what to cook and/or where to go.
I'd love to spend some quiet time with Hubs. The last couple nights we've finished the night out by watching a movie together (both movies have sucked, pretty much), and it's been really nice. It'd be nice to get some time with him.
For me, it's weird not to have a plan. It's also weird for me to not have already screwed up or bailed out on my plan, but that's a whole different story.
One thing I WILL be doing today? Painting my toenails again!! *lol* I just stripped off the old polish and discovered the source my toe soreness lately. I have bruises on some of my toes UNDER my toenails and they look nasty! I can't help, though, but to take it as a badge of honor - this is something I've heard of happening to runners. I am a runner. I have the bruises to prove it!! *lol*
I hope you all have a wonderful day! I'm going to be resting so whether you follow my lead or go hit it hard at the gym, just stick to your schedule! I already decided that I will get another sticker for today if I stick to my scheduled routine...and my scheduled routine says "Rest!" Is this cheating? Hell no! Learning to rest, for me at least, has been vital to being able to stay at this for over a year. It's been vital to breaking the 2011 plateau. No more burn fast and burn out - I'm striving for consistency, and if I want to keep improving my fitness ability and stay on task, I need my rest days. My body NEEDS these to heal so I can continue on...and I want to continue on, that's for sure!
Wednesday, November 02, 2011
Yesterday was the first day of the new month and the first time I was trying something new...kinda. Usually Tuesdays/Thursdays were reserved for Zumba, but lately I've cut back to just Tuesdays. Still, every single Zumba workout at the gym leaves me seriously sore, sometimes in a lot of pain in my back/hips/knees. I've tried to hang on to it. I know how many calories I burn (a lot) and I know that I love the dance factor of it, but I came to the realization at my last Zumba class that my attempt to hang on to something that's hurting me has been....well, hurting me. Sometimes I can't even hardly walk the next day. I seriously think it might be causing me to crap out on the rest of my workouts for the week as my body tries to recover. (My home Zumba game doesn't hurt me like this, so I still have that when I need a fix.)
That being said, I couldn't just not do anything...and I wanted something that was similar in effort/calorie burn, but without the nasty side effects. Enter Nike Training Camp. In October I finally broke open this program and attempted my first circuit program. It wasn't pretty, but it didn't hurt me like Zumba did. Left me sore? YES! But the "day after a good workout" kind of sore. That I can handle. Plus, for the month of October I was doing my circuits the day before my LDRs and somehow I was still able to continue the next day without the same problems that Zumba was causing me.
So last night while my Zumba class worked out next to me, separated only by a wall, I pushed through my own 30 minute circuit training workout. Once again, it wasn't pretty...but each time I do it I can feel how much better I'm getting. I actually lasted through some of the 30 second and 2 minute drills without stopping...something I couldn't do before. It was a little difficult to not have the group behind me, but at one point, when they started their first song and I realized that one of the moves in that song is a "no no" according to my chiro, and one that always leaves me hurting, I realized the freedom I felt to be doing my own thing and not having to feel like I was being monitored for my modifications by an entire class. (I know that this is all in my head...those people don't care what I'm doing, and sometimes they even watch me FOR my modifications because they need them too...but it was nice to be only competing with myself.)
Here was last night's circuit:
Get Lean/Beginner/30 Minutes -- Slim Chance
1 min Straight Leg Kicks
1 min High Knee Runs
1 min Light Jog
1 min Walking Lunges
2 min Recover
30 sec Ski Jumps*
30 sec Mountain Climbers*
1 min Wood Chops*
30 sec Split Jumps
30 sec Froggers*
1 min Recover
30 sec High Knee Runs in Place
30 sec Squat Jumps
1 min Modified Pushups
30 sec Two Feet Lateral Hops in Place
30 sec Two Feet Backward/Forward Hops
1 min Recover
2 min Alternating Forward Lunge with Arm Curl
30 sec Broad Jumps*
30 sec Two Feet Lateral Hops Distance
1 min Recover
2 min Side Lunge*
1 min Bicycles
1 min Toe Touches
30 sec Knee Tucks
1 min Recover
30 sec Plank
1 min Russian Twists
2 min Pretzel Stretch (1 min each side)
2 min Lying Quad Stretch (1 min each side)
1 min Lower Back Stretch (30 sec each side)
Now I totally FELT this, especially in my hips. I felt it in my legs, arms and back too, but not in a "I can't go on" kind of way. I can't say enough how much I friggin' LOVE this application! Each time I think, "OMG! I can't do anymore!!!" that sweet voice pops up with a Recovery time. PHEW! *lol* I remember the first time I did this routine and this time I did MUCH more and was able to recover a lot quicker. I kept thinking, "Hrm...isn't recovery time over by now?" whereas the first time it was more like, "I need another 2 minutes of recovery please!!"
*Ski Jumps - I hated these the first time. I loved them last night. I really felt like I was making that skiing motion and I noticed my balance was much better this time when I landed.
*Mountain Climbers - Okay, these are the worst, most humiliating things to do in a full gym when your belly is flopping around. I almost stopped. It was the only time I was wishing for my Friday almost empty gym!
*Wood Chops - Finally! I just didn't "get" these the first time I did them, but last night they felt right. I'm feeling myself getting better/lower in my squats. I can tell my form is much better and I'm really feeling it in my legs.
*Froggers - HAHAHAHA! These crack me up. I think I did 4 in the time frame. *snort* Somewhere to improve, I guess.
*Broad Jumps - Holy crap I was actually able to do these last night! The first time they looked like tiny little hops, but this time I was able to jump farther and landed softly in my squat position. Yay for improvements!!
*Side Lunge - I couldn't believe I lasted the ENTIRE 2 minutes with these. Again, they felt right finally. My lunging technique has seriously improved, as has my balance.
Still need to work on my planks, pushups, bicycles, and toe touches. Oh, and of course the froggers and knee tucks and moutain climbers. So, room to improve.
Today I feel good, if not a little tired. I got everything done on my list yesterday, and that alone feels great! I got my work done, I reconnected with some of my Sparkies, I wrote some (and signed up for NANOWRIMO), and then I left work and headed straight for the gym even though I was feeling completely exhausted and didn't think I could make it through a workout, I made myself go and clock in and change and start, and then the rest took care of itself. I left there feeling wonderful. I didn't feel as sick as when I had gone in or as tired. I stopped off at the Redbox (we've been without TV for a couple days) and then stopped at the gas station and bought myself a treat - Diet Peach Tea Snapple. YUM! :) Off to home where I got to work on the Stuffed Red Peppers (which were delicious!) and then got to bed before midnight! :) (For me that's really good! *lol*)
I'm sticking a big happy sticker on my calendar for November 1st and hoping to follow that with a sticker every day possible when I follow my plan and stick to it. I have to say that I'm finally getting seriously hopeful for hitting the 200's. I haven't seen those darn things since high school, y'all! And I had a moment the other day when I realized that once I get to 299, it's not THAT much further to 230, which is my big goal right now (then we'll reevaluate and see if I need to go down more). Crazy that I've spent much of 2011 thinking this could/would never happen and now I'm finally seeing the path is lit again and I'm pushing forward! (Dear Lord, peeps, hold me to that!)
So...onward, right!? :)
- Work, of course
- Log my food (actually mostly done already, but I need to make a few adjustments)
- Drink 8-10 glasses of water
- Log my weight for today (305.4) in my Net Cal spreadsheet
- Write 1,000 words for NaNo
- Think of plot and character development and start making something happen there
- Speedwork tonight: W/U at 3.2 walking for .25 mile, then at least 5 intervals at 5.3 speed and the rest of my running at 4.0-4.2 for "recovery" times, and a C/D of at least .25 mile at 3.0-3.2 speed.
- Then STRETCH
- Home to cook up some chicken fajitas with spanish rice and beans (if I have any! eeps!)
- Then ICE, and REST and to bed before midnight again
The one thought that's getting me through today? "Tomorrow's your rest day so you can stand one more day of hard work." :)
Happy Wednesday, everyone!!
Tuesday, November 01, 2011
Weight 1st of October: 310.4
Weight Goal for November 1st: 304.4
Actual Weight for November 1st: 306.4
Total Weight Lost in October: 4 pounds
*sigh* IF it hadn't have been for yesterday/last night, that weight lost total would be just a little bit higher...I may have actually hit my goal if not for the trouble last night. Combine overworking your body with staying up too late with getting too little sleep and instead of going DOWN from yesterday's 305.0 weigh in, I went back up to 306.4. *smacks forehead* Ah-well. It was a necessary evil as I had to get the final deals I could at Wal-Mart before they stopped doubling their coupons.
Anyhow, it's still me moving down on the scale by the end of the month. Two months is a row, so we seem to be getting back on track. I mean, I certainly miss the months of losing 8-12 pounds per month, but after all the months of NOTHING, I'm happy to just get 3-4 pounds and know I'm moving in the right direction.
My Goals for October were:
1. Stick to the 1600-1800 calorie range.
I tried, but it didn't work out so well. In fact, I've tried allowing myself around 2k calories per day to make up for the sweaty workouts I've been putting in and so far it's going well. This is one of those goals that needed adjusting, so I adjusted. That being said, I've been doing pretty well staying on track MOST days. Not all days, but most. I've had some days over 2k calories, and I've had some days under 1600, but mostly I'm in the 1600-2000 range.
2. Make healthy meals at home.
I've gotten into this habit a lot more lately and it's felt really good. That isn't to say that we don't eat out. We still do...too much, actually. I'm hoping that will change even more now that Ethan's done with football and there are less LATE LATE nights for us with little time. Let's face it, there's a reason fast food joints are so popular - convenience! When you work 10 hours, drive 2, workout 1, and then spend an hour at the practice field and you finally leave around 8pm to head home, the LAST thing you (okay, *I*) want to do is go home and spend another hour cooking dinner. So sometimes the fast food is a way to save my sanity. I've been trying to find more convenience foods for home, but I just haven't had a lot of time recently to do things like batch cooking. Too many chores, too little me, I guess. Like I said, hoping that will improve this month.
3. Pack my lunches.
This one I have been SUPER good at. I rarely order out anymore and instead choose to pack a salad and sandwich or some leftovers instead. Keeps me on task a little more and I know, at least, that lunch is covered.
4. Plan ahead on what I'll eat for the week and try to stick to that. It keeps me on task.
For the most part I've been doing pretty darn good at this. I plan my meals for the entire week, and then make adjustments when/if things come up. It DOES help keep me on task.
5. Cardio schedule:
Monday - Easy Run
Tuesday - Zumba
Thursday - Speedwork Run
Saturday - 5k
HAHAHAHA! My plans always change so much. For the most part, though, I've been sticking to those 3 runs a week, one day of Zumba, and then one circuit training round. I have plans (again) to change this for November.
6. When possible and able, stick in biking on Wednesdays and XT of some sort on Fridays.
Biking on the stationary bike will NEVER be a love of mine. I forced myself through some, and I'll probably pull it in now and again because it totally works the inside of my thighs, but it's nothing I enjoy. XT on Fridays? For the past 3-4 weeks I've been following the Nike Training Camp circuit training app, which I DO love. Going to keep that one up and going to get Ethan in on some of the action because a lot of the recommended off-season football conditioning moves are things I do in my circuit training.
7. Rest on Sundays. It's my one day to not worry so much about how many miles I'm putting in or how many cardio minutes I need for the week. Plus, it's been essential in my 5k Saturday recovery.
I love my Sunday rest days. Now that there's no football, I'm hoping to squeeze in a bath on this day.
8. ST schedule:
Okay, so ST has taken a huge backseat. That being said, I still work my muscles a ton during my speedwork runs and in my Circuit training. ST has its uses, but for right now I'm all about calorie burning in short bursts so I can keep this streak going.
9. Drink my water!!
DONE! And will keep doing it!
10. Do my CC stretches!
11. My running goal - 3.1 miles straight.
I can now run 3.5 miles straight.
Not a bad month overall. Now to November Goals.
1. Stick as close to 1k net calorie deficit each day of the week. Keep using your Net Cal spreadsheet to track! (Thanks SUGIRL! ;) )
2. Log EVERYTHING and pre-log!
Once again, prelogging is helping, so I'm going to keep at it.
3. Fitness Minutes for the month: 1200
Last month I got about 1000, so I'd like to do a tiny bit better than that this month.
4. Miles to run this month: 40
I have a end of 2011 goal to log 100 miles in October-December. In October I managed 21 miles. Now that I'm running longer, and if I stay consistent, I'm hoping to increase in November.
5. Complete a 5k Turkey Trot
My sister has been a little leary of this, but I need to find one to do because it keeps me motivated to keep running.
6. Maintain control during holidays and keep moving!
I have to remember that no matter how good something might taste, I can always have it another time and, even if I don't, the world is not going to end if I don't sample it. I'll eat what I want, maintain control and then stop when I'm full. And I'll keep moving the entire month...not slack off just because it happens to be a holiday or something.
7. DRINK WATER!
It's hard when it's cold, but it's still necessary. No wimping out on something this easy!
Weight Goal for December 1st: 299.9
There, I said it.
It's 6.5 pounds and totally doable. AND I WANTS IT!!!!!!!
November 1, 2011 (Just remembered I need to update my measurements too....)
EDIT: Lost on my hips, waist, thighs, calves, and upper arms! =D
Happy Thanksgiving Month! ;)
Monday, October 31, 2011
I thought it was just another Monday. *snort* No dressing up for me. No parties. Just a walk through a nearby town while the boys collected candy, my back hurting a bit by the end of the hour and getting impatient to go home. Thankfully both my kids said, "That's enough candy for me...let's go!" after just an hour (they do 2 hours of T-o-T in our town).
Yesterday my son's team got shut out by the #1 seated team, but I'm not overly depressed about it. If his team had to lose to anyone, I wanted it to be this team. They play with class and respect, something that was confirmed for me when one of their coaches walked up to our team afterward and said, "I know this might not mean much to you guys right now, but you have improved SO much since the last time we played you!" He was so sincere, and he did not have to come up to our kids at all. Mineral Wells is a team that is good because they play hard, because they practice hard, and because they teach their kids how to win FAIRLY. Huge difference from the team we played in the quarter finals who MUST teach their kids things like blocking in the back because they do it CONSTANTLY...and then they complain when our kids play long and hard and beat them by just 8 points (a 8-0 game) that they were "cheated" and that our boys "cheated." (Ethan looked at me confused when they said it and I looked down at him, shook my head and gave him a look that we'd talk about it later. I told him that the coaches were upset that they weren't able to cheat their way to a win. They were mad they got called on some of the illegal things the team does on a regular basis. They didn't expect to be beaten by our boys, by a fair team, and they were grasping for straws to explain it...and all they knew was "cheating" as an explaination. He knows that I'm the first mom to criticize if our kids start playing wrong, start pulling illegal moves, because as much as I want our boys to win, I still remember that these are 9 and 10 year olds and it's much more important to teach them sportsmanship, discipline, and playing by the rules.)
I also realized yesterday that, while our boys didn't make it to the Championship game, I fully believe they are champions in their own right. I have never seen a team improve so much over one season (except the Bucks, who seem to be turning something out/around finally) and my son has improved so much from the kid he was when he started. This year I saw his drive and determination. He's growing up and becoming a young man that his Mommy can be proud of. As I watched my son in this difficult game against the #1 team, I watched him break through the line, jump over another player on the ground and run his heart out toward the ball carrier to pull out a tackle. That is not the boy that started this year. He's learning how to "read" plays, how to assess where the ball might be going and where he should be. He's gone from blocking well to "shucking" blockers and getting tackles. He's played center, right/left guard, and linebacker and has grown and learned with each change. I don't give 2 craps what the score was yesterday - my boy was a winner and I'm proud to be his Mom!
That being said, we're both just a tiny bit sad about the season ending. Ethan made more friends this year, of course, but so did his mom. I started putting myself out there, talking to other Moms, getting to know them a little bit, and it's been a lot of fun "hanging out" at practice instead of just sitting there getting cold as the nights grow longer. After the game yesterday, Ethan said to me, "I'm going to miss my team...." and then he stopped and said, "...my family." I smiled at him. How can such a little boy be so sweet and smart and sentimental. He understands that "family" can come from anywhere, that it isn't always just reserved for mom, dad, brother, g'parents, but that sometimes you can build your family out of people sharing a common goal/dream and working toward it together. He's understanding the bonds of friendship and how to foster them. This is the same boy who last year (and at the beginning of this year) thought no one liked him.
So, yes, we'll miss them...but there will be a next season, I'm pretty darn sure of that. Ethan not only loves playing football, but he's really good at it and he just keeps getting better.
I joked to Hubs yesterday that I was changing his name to "Owen Schmidt" because he actually CRACKED his facemask in the game yesterday because he was playing so hard! (Scared, but proud Momma. *lol*)
For the reference, read here:
And before that we still have:
Football Awards Banquet
I told Ethan this morning that we have months between now and when the next season starts to do a lot of conditioning and make him even better. The HS players are supposed to host an agility conditioning training in January that I'd certainly like for him to attend. But since Momma knows how to train for things, I think Momma is going to set up some regular conditioning for him between now and then. And, as I was talking about that this morning to him, and before anyone gets on me about being one of "those" moms that pushes too hard, he busts in with, "Well, I was thinking. Football starts in late July. My birthday is in April. You said that I have to be 10 to workout at the gym with you. That gives me 2 months at the gym before practice starts." *lol* Yep, that's my boy. So now that I've got a training schedule for now, I need one for him that will include:
- Blocking passes
- Blocking on the line (offense and defense)
Anyone have a good football training schedule that isn't too NFL hardcore? *lol* I don't want to go crazy, but if he wants a way to get better in the meantime, then I should be able to help him out with that.
Hope everyone has a great Halloween or, if you're like me, Monday! *lol*
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