Sunday, September 11, 2011
Well, for accountability's sake...here it is, in all its wonderful non-glory...
Weight Last Week: 312.2
Weight Goal for This Week: 310.2
Actual Weight This Week: 317.2
So that means I gained 5 pounds. *pouts*
I can't give excuses. I earned those 5 pounds. How?
- I slacked off on drinking my water.
- I didn't exercise all week except yesterday.
- I ate my emotions.
And that, my dears, is how you gain 5 pounds in a week. Question is, can we work on losing them again?
How, you ask?
- I'm going to drink my water! No less than 64 oz every single day.
- I'm going to cook at home delicious and healthy meals with lots of fresh veggies.
- I'm going to stay within my calorie ranges.
- I'm headed back into the gym. The PMP challenge is now underway and I'm ready for it! Also going to work on building up my running endurance and stamina.
Last week was horrible. I haven't experienced pain like that for a while. But now I'm feeling better. I put more exercise minutes in yesterday than I had all week. I did a 5k with my son (53 minutes), of which I ran 3 times even though both knees hurt, my back is still a bit sore, and my left knee popped out twice. Then it was about an hour of bowling followed by an hour or more of pulling weeds and general gardening. Not to mention I had to do my baselines for the PMP challenge, which included 30 regular pushups, 35 squats, a 33 second plank, and 49 crunches. I also did a few dumbbell curls at the gym and some tricep exercises as well to test my baseline for weight lifting. So put all that together and I put in at least 3 hours of exercises in ONE DAY! That should be a lesson to me that I'm NOT too tired and that I CAN put in at least 30-60 minutes of exercises every single day.
Plan for this week, fitness wise:
Sunday - Walk the dog and maybe some tennis if the fam is up to it and we can squeeze it in.
Monday - Run and ST
Tuesday - Zumba and ST
Wednesday - At least 20 minutes on the bike followed by at least 10 minutes of stretching.
Thursday - Run and ST
Friday - XT and ST
Saturday - I'm thinking of doing my 5k again and seeing if I can run a little more of it this time.
As for food?
I'm going to put in some pork loin for dinner tonight and make a bunch of roasted veggies too.
I've got a 3-bean taco soup from SparkRecipes to make.
I've got some chicken for a healthy Chicken and Dumplings recipe. (Healthy comfort food? Uhm, yes please!)
I've also got some split chicken breasts, some tofu, rice, and veggies galore so there are NO excuses!
Also on tap for this week? Couponing, of course! I'm printing my online coupons now and am about to put them together with Ethan for a cheap shopping trip later. Only buying things we need to get us through the week and/or what I can get for DIRT cheap. One downfall? I'm pretty sure I'm going to get Chips Ahoy cookies because they're super, super cheap with the coupons I have and the sale Kroger is running. I am going to try to set aside 2 servings for myself in little baggies for treats for this week and then I'm not touching the bag the rest of the time.
Weight goal for next week? Let's face it, I'd like to get all 5 of those pounds back off this week, and it may actually be doable because I think a lot of it is non-activity combined with low water intake. Still, I need to be more realistic, so if I get to 315.2 or under, I'll be plenty happy with that!
I'm pretty sure I have another gym weigh-in this week and I REALLY wanted to lose the suggested 4 pounds in a month they want me to lose... weighed in today at the same weight I was when I weighed in at the gym last time, though, so unless my body catches up pretty quickly, it doesn't seem like that will happen. *sigh* Well, maybe the FFM/body fat numbers will make up for it...
Time to get my head back on my shoulders and kick through this like the superheroine I know I can be!
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Yes, I'm coming to the party a tiny bit late. Let me explain (though I'm trying to tell myself I don't need to, but when I get a 5 pound gain tomorrow I'll need to log why that happened). This week was hell. Absolute hell! I had an adjustment from the Chrio on Tuesday evening and by Wednesday I was sore from my butt to the top of my head. So sore, in fact, that I had to take a half day off work during our busy time to go home and just sleep for 4 hours. It was horrible. I felt helpless. The pain finally started to ease up around 7pm on Thursday night.
This wasn't usual soreness. This was pure, unadulterated pain. I didn't even want to talk about it. I cried myself to sleep every night. I ate my feelings. There, I said it. I was scared and confused about the whole thing and I just didn't know what to do with myself. Thursday night I decided that I would take Friday off too, just to be sure. I met with the Chiro again for another adjustment last night and explained what happened.
CC: So, did you Zumba this week?
Me: NO! I didn't do ANYTHING this week.
Me: I was in so much pain Wednesday I had to take off work and go home and sleep and that's about all I've been able to do the past couple days.
CC: Hrm...I didn't expect that this late...
CC: I expected that last week, and when you said you were fine, I figured maybe you wouldn't go through it.
Picture me glaring at the chiro with those dagger eyes.
CC: Remember I told you a few weeks ago that once this started to take hold it would really hurt?
Picture me still staring at him. No, I didn't remember anything like that...
CC: This is actually a good thing. It usually happens a couple weeks in. People who aren't so active probably wouldn't feel it so much, but it's your body finally holding the adjustments and trying to adjust to the way you're supposed to be.
Me (trying to calm down and not kill him): So this is normal?
CC: Yes. Like I said, I expected it last week.
Me: You could've warned me!
(insert nervous chuckle)
Me: I almost banged down your door Wednesday asking for answers.
CC: That's fine.
CC: It shouldn't happen again. If it happens again this weekend, call me first thing Monday and let me know. Otherwise, you should be good.
Me: Good, because I need to get back to exercising and I want to run tomorrow.
CC smiled at me then...and I didn't want to punch his pretty face anymore.
So, yeah, I'm hoping that's all that was. One of those "it gets worse before it gets better" kind of deals. I have a run scheduled for today. My newly 12-year-old has said he will go with me and we're thinking of making it a 5k day. I won't be worried about running it all. I'll run when I want, walk the rest. Then I must get to the gym and get my baseline measurements for PMP.
So here's my entry card for the challenge, which I will complete. I took a week off...that is enough! Time to get back to it and get things moving in the right direction again.
This WILL be filled out by the end of the day!
1. Find your official starting line.
Crunches completed in 1 minute ___49____
Pushups completed in 1 minute ___30____
How long (up to one minute) can you hold a plank or modified plank? __33 sec___
Squats (or lunges, or both)(without weights) completed in 1 minute ___35____
5k Time ____53 minutes____
2. What equipment will be you be using in this challenge?
A. Gym equip (resistance and/or heavy weight machines)
B. My own body weight
D. Free weights and dumbbells at home or at the gym.
3. What dumbbells weight/resistance level are you starting at? (if applicable)
Curls - I'm at around 20-25 lbs. max.
Triceps - I'm at around 30 lbs. max.
Leg Press - I'm at around 340 max.
Barbell Bench Press - I'm at around 55 lbs. max.
4. Why do you feel the burning desire to grow stronger, to change shape, to prove yourself? TO PROVE TO MYSELF THAT I STILL HAVE THE POWER TO CREATE THE BODY I WANT. A BODY STRONG ENOUGH TO TACKLE THE CHALLENGES I WANT TO FACE AND OVERCOME IN THE UPCOMING YEARS.
5. Create your tracking space.
You need to have one of the following:
A Windows Calendar
An Excel Spreadsheet or some kind of computer worksheet
A calendar and stickers/markers in a central location in your home or workout space
A phone app
Your sparkpeople workout log
- Create your own tracking thread in the PMP team (WHICH IS NOW A PRIVATE TEAM!)
6. Your dreaded before pictures.
A. take pictures of any specific areas where you plan on tracking changes in physical appearance. You CANNOT spot-shrink specific areas of your body, but if you dedicate serious time and hard work into squats, your leg muscles will indeed change shape. SO to track these changes, without expecting to get a washboard tummy by only doing crunches every day for the next 8 weeks, you can take before pictures of:
B. You can post these in the PMP Challenge Photo Album, But I ask and strongly urge anyone that posts before pics in there, to also take the time to encourage the other brave souls who also posted their before pics.
7. Starting Line Measurements
Biceps - 14.5
Forearms - 10.5
Shoulders Across - 18
Bust - 47
Abs/Back - 49
Waist - 46.75
Hips - 57.25
Butt - 56.5
Thighs - 25.25
Knees - 17
Calves - 20
Sunday, September 04, 2011
Well, here we are again. it's weigh in day...
Weight Last Week: 315.4
Weight Goal for This Week: 313.4
Actual Weight This Week: 312.2
Loss This Week: 3.2 pounds!!
Total Lost with SP: 104 pounds
Total Lost Overall: 154.4 pounds
Still feeling good. Still a little confused about the whole "do this/don't do this" nonsense...but pushing through it. Yesterday I iced myself down as much as possible and I have to say I feel better today than I have in a little while. Still sore in my back, but doing alright.
Let's go over what I did right this week that led to this success, shall we?
1. I ate within my calorie ranges. YAY me! It's been so long since I've been able to stay consistent with this! I was really worried about yesterday because I got hungry on the way to Ethan's football game, but I felt so much better once I realized the field we went to had a deal with Subway and I was able to get a 6 inch sub on wheat! YAY! I also didn't eat Dairy Queen when the family went after the game, and instead came home and finished off some leftovers from our Pad Thai Stir Fry. I win!
2. I stuck pretty closely to my exercise routines, taking time off when I needed it for my back.
Monday - Leg ST followed by a Run that went surprisingly well
Tuesday - ST and Elliptical time
Wednesday - Rested
Thursday - Zumba and ST (though I cut it a little short...)
Friday - I took off, but I did actually run at the mall trying to find Hubs when we got separated from one another. I walked the dang mall at least twice and then was running from the car to inside and back...in flip flops! *lol*
Saturday - 2 miles total, about 1 1/2 running with a few breaks after running a little over a mile straight.
3. I drank my water! How could I not with the heat we've been experiencing this week?! UGH!
4. I kept my positive attitude, and when that failed and I got confused, I did what I know I should do anyhow. I keep thinking, "If I want this to work I have to do the best I can every single day."
All in all, a pretty good week, methinks!
Working on a meal plan for the week. The grocery store has pork loin and chicken on sale this week, so I'm trying to devise a plan that uses these two ingredients. (Just finding a recipe for pork loin that doesn't include barbecue sauce - which I hate - has been a challenge. I used to have a recipe for these Asian Lettuce Wraps that I think could work with pulled pork, but now I can't find the stupid thing. Sucks too because it was SOOO good! I'll keep looking...)
And my plan for next week is the same as this week.
- Stay within my ranges
- Drink my water
- Stick to my workout schedule
- Make adjustments when needed but don't use it as an excuse to crap out completely.
Monday - Leg ST and a Run
(Going to have to remember to get to my FIL's house to use his weights because the gym is closed tomorrow. *pouts*)
Tuesday - Push ST and Elliptical
Wednesday - Bike for 20 minutes (I'd really like to do this one this week...I haven't gotten it done once yet)
Thursday - Zumba and Pull ST
Friday - Shoulders/Abs/Biceps ST and Circuit or Cross Training
Saturday - Another shot at that 2 mile run
Wish me luck!!
And now, for the Football report... *lol*
So my youngest had another game yesterday. Let me first say that sitting in the heat, even when you beg someone to sit under their awning thing for some shade, for hours and hours is NOT fun. It was HOT yesterday...I mean HOT! It didn't help that Ethan didn't play the entire first half of the game and so I didn't have anything to distract me. After about an hour there I started feeling sick, and I knew exactly what it was...I was about to hit the heat exhaustion threshold. I was drinking my water, but it wasn't enough. I finally broke down and bought us all those Flavor Ice things (those who know me knows I don't do popsicles...) and eating that made me feel better immediately!
After the half, they finally put second string in and had first string remove their pads. (It was super hot, remember? They were taking extended breaks to water down the players anytime they changed possession of the ball.) Finally! I was gonna get to see my son play. And he was finally going to be able to show the coaches what he has to give. (We've been talking recently about how important it is for him to show them everything he's got during game time and practice so they might move him into first string where he wants to be.) Sure enough, my son gets in at noseguard and gets a tackle not long after being in. A few plays later and he assists with another tackle! I was so proud! But then they switch to offense and I'm shocked when I realized my son is playing center - arguably one of the most important positions on the team. He did it perfectly. He didn't bobble one snap and then he got up and guarded his quarterback. *PROUD MOMMA!* As center, he led the second string to a touchdown and helped the team walk out of there with an even better score for their W column!
On a weight-loss related note. Under the tent-like thing we were under there were a small group of little kids playing around with a digital camera. One of them kept taking video of everyone and then showing them. At one point she turned the camera on me while I was trying to watch my son play. "Look," she then says to me and starts giggling. I look and there I am on her little camera. And, you know what? I didn't want to punch the girl in the face! *lol* I didn't look bad. I looked GOOD actually! I was super happy with that and I smiled at her, told her she "got me" and held my head a little higher. We all know how horrible candid shots can turn out, but this one I was quite alright with. *big grin*
So, a good day yesterday and a good week this week (for the most part) led to another loss on the scale. I'm happy with that, and I'm ready to keep going. Just 12.3 pounds away from Deuceland!! I cannot wait!!
I'll leave you with some food p0rn! *lol*
Our healthy dinner I threw together the other evening.
I marinated the chicken in some Balsamic stuff, but that wasn't the important part. *lol* My cracked fingerling (well, I used red, but the recipe says "fingerling" but I didn't have any of those) potatoes were awesome and much quicker than roasting. Plus they weren't totally soft and I'm surprised I liked the firmness of them. It was fun to make too because I cracked my potatoes by banging them with my cast iron skillet. *lol* Only mushed one! *snort* They and the other veggies (which I roasted in the oven) got the same treatment - olive oil, ground thyme, grated Parmesan cheese, and a bit of sea salt and cracked pepper. They were AMAZING! *LOVE* Will now know how to roast veggies easily.
And my omelet this morning, thanks to some help from my sister:
Onion and celery cooked with some olive oil. Then I tossed in 3 egg whites and one full egg that I had whisked together. Added a bit of turkey and cheese in the middle and some salt, cracked pepper and a touch of garlic powder while it was cooking. OMG! NOM!! I think next time I'll just leave the cheese and turkey out because it doesn't really need it. Sis tosses some feta on top after it comes off the stove, but I didn't have any in the house. Still...so good and only about 300 calories. A little higher in fat than I wanted, but oh-well. Good breakfast choice over the Shoney's buffet the kids wanted this morning.
Saturday, September 03, 2011
I didn't want to run this morning.
No. That's not right. I wanted to run, I was just scared to because I didn't want to "fail" again. For the past, oh, I don't know, month or so I've been working uber hard to get my body to a place where it can run two miles straight without stopping. The closest I had gotten was about 1.25 miles or just over. And it was so hard! But I keep trying.
Yesterday, I had a meltdown. I went to my CC and he adjusted my back again, but this time he decided to poke and press on the little middle lower back area that I just avoid touching completely. It's sore. And when he pressed on it, I actually whimpered. He apologized, but we've gotten to the point where it's necessary to really work on the root of my problems. He's been working the pelvis tilt fixes for a while, now to tackle the very, very, very sore disk in my lower back. I wanted to cry, but I didn't let myself. "Have to be strong!" I told myself. So I was...and I didn't cry even though I really wanted to.
And then we were done with adjustments and it was time for our regular talk. He said he was "surprised" that I only had to stop once in my 40 minute Zumba class on Thursday. "Not surprised that you could do it," he quickly added. "Just surprised you didn't need to stop more." He figured I'd be in more pain. He doesn't realize that I've learned to just work through pain because I don't realize there might be life without it...or maybe I realize some people get that, but I don't believe I ever will. And if I let pain stop me, I wouldn't be where I am now. I have had to learn what pain is manageable and what pain is not.
And then he told me not to do anything that involved standing on one leg for too long with high knees. Ugh! That's a definite Zumba move. He told me I could do it over and over a thousand times but it only would take once and I'd be flat on the floor in extreme pain and would undo all the work we had done. I told him I would modify, but I felt my heart breaking. I went through the list in my head of all the workouts I do, all the ones I enjoy, and I got scared. Really, really scared. But I showed a brave face and told him I would soldier on. And I smiled at the girl at the front desk as I passed and headed out to the car.
And then I stopped. And I shook...and I couldn't stop shaking. And I tried to tell myself I was fine because I was physically alright, if just a little sore. And I got in the car and put the key in and then I stopped again and started crying uncontrollably.
Hubs asked what was wrong and I couldn't tell him. I told him it hurt. I told him I was in pain. I told him I didn't know what was really wrong because I wasn't in enough pain to cause this kind of reaction. I apologized for falling apart and tried to laugh it off and move on.
I shook for at least an hour, all through breakfast I tried to right myself, but I couldn't focus. I just kept feeling like my world was falling apart. And I didn't understand it...I just didn't know what what I was feeling. I couldn't vocalize it (and I'm not exactly known for not being able to speak my mind). But I kept falling apart over and over and I felt like I couldn't move or breathe.
Yes, I experienced pain at the Chiro's office. And while, yes, it was more than usual because he found my sore spot, it wasn't anything I couldn't normally work my way through. But still, all day I kept falling apart. It wasn't until hours later that I realized I was scared and heartbroken and confused.
If I work out, I could really injure myself badly.
If I don't work out, I won't ever lose this weight and that will hurt me too.
And so I'm stuck between a rock and a very, very sore place. Darned if I do, darned if I don't, and not knowing which is the right option. I've done so much for my health in the past year, and I'm so thankful for that. But now I'm faced with the pain of putting such a large body through so much to get where I am. It's hilarious that I thought it was so slow moving...maybe, for my body's sake, I didn't move slow enough.
So when I woke up this morning, I was still sore and heart broken and terrified. I had skipped my workout the night before and felt so incredibly guilty. I could've done that workout...but it might've really hurt me. I had looked at the planned ST and they were risky moves with all the soreness in my back. CC says my stomach is weak, but crunches really hurt my hips and back, but I need them to correct the problem. Do you see the vicious circle forming? I just don't know what to do half the time or what the right answer is.
I did finally get myself mentally to a place where I let my run happen. It was difficult. I got 2 miles in, only about a mile and a half of that running, and only just over a mile of that running without a break. I went farther today, but I'm still not there yet. And while I want to rejoice in what I've done and how I'm getting so much closer to my 2.5 milers with 2 miles running, I can feel the pain in my lower back starting and I know it's going to be a rough day.
CC says don't stop running/walking. He says modify Zumba, but don't stop working out. He says it's good for me, but I need to listen to my body. Problem is, I can't tell what my body is saying. I'm not sure how sore is too sore, how much pain is too much pain. And I'm terrified I'm going to end up in a bed somewhere unable to walk because I pushed too hard, or in a bed somewhere bedridden again because I gave up when I should've pressed on.
I have no answers as of yet. I'll keep pressing on for now. I'll keep icing. I'll keep hoping that continued progress will keep me progressing toward what I really want. But I do hope that sometime soon I can shake this fear, because I hate letting it control me...or confuse me. I never want to go back to a life of fear again. I want to be the brave girl, the girl that soldiered on even when it got difficult. I want to be able to look back on my life and say, "I got through some really rough stuff and I'm so much better for it!" So that's what I'll keep doing. I'll keep trying to read my body and just hope I'm reading it right. Man, I wish there was a manual for this...
Workout today is complete.
2 miles in just under 32 minutes. (closer to my goal of consistent 15 minute miles too...) Over 300 calories burned. Now to just keep my eating and water in check and pray the scale doesn't act like a dope tomorrow morning... I'd love to see a 313 number...
Still have 3 football games, a yard that needs mowed, a garden that needs weeded, and meal planning to do for next week. Onward...however apprehensively...
Friday, September 02, 2011
YAY for the weekend! (For those that don't know, I work about 50 miles from my house and thanks to a wonderful former Governor who saw the gas prices being raised to extremely high numbers (can we say ridiculous?) he allowed those agencies that wanted to and could to offer 4-day work weeks. That means I work 10 hour shifts 4 days a week and get most of my Fridays off to take care of other things like doctor appointments, chores around the house, etc. Saves me 100 miles driving a week!)
So my plan for this weekend seems simple enough. Let's just hope I can get it all in.
0 Marinate the chicken! (Must remember to do this before I leave this AM)
0 Chiro appointment
0 Breakfast with the Hubs
0 Shopping for my son's birthday (and maybe for another sports bra and another pair of compression pants/shorts)
0 Weed the garden! (boy, does it need it! Poor neglected garden!)
0 Collect yummy veggies from the garden
0 ST workout
0 At least 30 minutes circuit or cross training
0 Make chicken and veggies for dinner tonight (I'm thinking roasted veggies including fingerling potatoes, asparagus, green peppers and tomatoes)
0 Take measurements for September (where did that pesky measuring tape run off to?)
0 Find my keys (seriously, they've been lost for weeks, y'all! MUST find my keys!)
0 OSU opener! YAY! (which I'll mostly be listening to b/c of the drive to...)
0 Ethan's game around 3pm
0 LDR of 2 miles (gonna give it another go! Wish me luck!)
0 Clean out some clothes from the closet
0 LSU game (I think that's what Hubs said we HAD to watch this weekend. *lol*)
0 Mow the lawn?
0 Meal and coupon plan for groceries for the week
0 Mow the lawn if I didn't Saturday
0 Grab a paper
0 Grocery shopping
0 Maybe some batch cooking for lunches for the week
0 Drive-in? (It's the last weekend *pouts* and they're showing Rise of the Planet of the Apes and Crazy Stupid Love. I want to see!!)
0 WVU opener
0 Call niece and wish her a Happy Birthday!
0 And send birthday love to my Zumba instructor too! :)
0 Morning run! (YAY! Love when I get week days of to do this!)
0 Hiking? (I would LOVE to hit the trails this weekend!)
0 ST will have to be done at the in laws since the gym is closed (BOO!!!)
0 Clothes sorting again
0 Enjoy my day off with the whole gang!
So that's the plan. Goals for this weekend are also simple:
- Finish out the week strong
- Follow the cardio and ST plans
- Get in some great family time
- Stay within my calorie ranges
- Budget for any big meals (breakfast today and the drive in Sunday)
- Drink my water! (I feel swollen today...huge workout night last night!)
- Have a happy heart (Gotta remember to keep encouraging myself along the way)
Yesterday went well. I worked my hiney off at work (actually, I totally wish I could do that!) and got an actual "Why can't our other workers be more like you?" from the supe! :) Then I hit the gym hard. Talked to my Zumba instructor and warned her that I'm still having back trouble so if I don't seem as responsive or don't show up as much (I've cut down to once a week) that's why. I stuck through 40 minutes of a crazy Zumba class (technical difficulties) and then did another 30-40 minutes of ST in the weight room. Cut my workout short by a couple things (didn't do my hyperextensions or my dumbbell curls) but we had done some toning during Zumba so my upper body is certainly feeling the workout today. (As I told Hubs, I figure if you're shaking/trembling while trying to get the toilet paper off the roll in the bathroom after your workout - I'd say you had a pretty good workout! *lol*)
Ate on the lower end of my calorie ranges (had a little trouble yesterday sticking to my eating schedule because of the crazy work horse attitude I had, but I still managed...thank goodness for Jimmy John's and their fast delivery!).
Drank all my water, plus some.
Sore and bloated today from a good workout and I'm thinking that ain't half bad. Hoping for some good results at weigh-in on Sunday.
Oh, and you can add to all my weekend lists above that I'm attempting to make my SP rounds this weekend. I missed checking in on y'all and I need to make sure I see how all my good friends, new and old, are hangin' in and whether they need some encouragement.
(Funny story...I actually spent about 5 minutes last night giving encouragement to my Zumba instructor. She was upset about how crazy our Zumba class was. When the short in her cord made her have to resort to old CDs of Zumba routines she had actually pretty much forgotten, she got a little flustered. My response? "At least we did it! We still got in 40 minutes of workout when we could've just said 'Screw it!' and not done it." She agreed. Then she got flustered because it was weigh-in night for her and she didn't lose anything. My response? "Hey, you didn't gain anything! Trust me, from a girl who yo-yoed the same 3 pounds for 5 months...a no gain week is a good thing!" Felt good to show some love to someone who has really helped me so much along the journey I've taken thus far. LOVE my Zumba instructor!)
Have a great long weekend everyone! Remember that weekend does not mean days off from healthy living. Just think, now you have MORE time to do what you want and ON YOUR OWN SCHEDULE! And Happy Birthday to those who are celebrating one this weekend (because I seem to know SO many!!)! :)
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