C-MERRIE11   39,387
30,000-39,999 SparkPoints
C-MERRIE11's Recent Blog Entries


Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I am LOVING this warm weather, you?

Spring means a lot of things this year. Both my husband I receive our graduate degrees, we find new jobs, and I'm aiming to be both ACE and Zumba certified by mid-June.

If I think back to where I was a year ago I just have to feel really warm and fuzzy inside. A year ago this time exactly I would have been feeling guilty for binges, feeling out of control and never feel like I could exercise enough. I would be all pent up with difficult feelings and would be feeling pretty helpless.

I haven't binged in ages now. I have learned new ways to express my feelings. Is it perfect? Nope. But for right now it's good enough for me :)

Thanks so much Spark!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JELLEN726 4/14/2011 9:02AM

    Yay for positive attitudes. I am so glad you are figuring out what you love and going down a great path. Happy Spring emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NPA4LOSS 4/12/2011 10:23PM

    emoticon emoticon You are Sparking now my friend!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISS_FIT_ 4/12/2011 8:55PM

    sounds perfect to me!!! so great that you managed to accomplish so much in one year! can't imagine how excited you must be to finish grad school!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESS_TWISTY 4/12/2011 7:13PM

    All your hard work (both mentally and physically) over the past year is obviously paying off. It's good to hear that you're now happy and healthy, and looking toward the future =)

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIME2BLOOM4ME 4/12/2011 5:53PM


Report Inappropriate Comment

Stress busting challenge, a delayed week 2

Tuesday, April 05, 2011

My progress with the stress busting challenge had to go a bit slower the past week as I've been out with strep throat. I thought it was just a sore throat since I had been having a sore throat one and off for the two week before hand. But then I stayed up really late at a friends house, where the whole family had just recovered from strep themselves, and I'm guessing I picked it up. My husband's system seemed to fight it off valiantly, but I woke up three days later after that late night with throat tissue so red and swollen it looked like a giant piece of raw steak was lodged back there or something. My energy overall was fine till I started on the antibiotics and the I guess the recovery process required loads of my energy and I felt wiped. And I just wasn't thinking clearly either.

Yesterday I was finally feeling kinda myself and for some reason the whole incident seemed to throw me off- I was feeling the pull of depression, discouragement, anxiety, etc. I think having the body invaded, unpredictable, was kinda triggering. Feels silly in some ways, even though it makes sense.

Yesterday I almost went into binge mode- I did not follow my meal plan, but it wasn't an utter relapse, so I'm not going to count it :) (I mean, I'm 43 days strong!) I won't count it because 1) I didn't over eat too much 2) I caught myself 3) I feel no guilt today! which means the cycle is broken.

The incident did remind me the need to be regular in practicing stress-reduction techniques so that I naturally use them at ever-higher levels of stress. I hadn't been sick for a while, and I wasn't prepared for it to be such a downer :)-

So for the second week of the stress busting challenge (on my schedule, who says you only need to take a month? Some challenges are harder than others, and may take more time... while at the same time I wouldn't want tot get caught in a mindset of having to do it perfectly, that would defeat the purpose, woudln't it?) these are the goals I have:

1. Use the box system each day for tracking my exchange meal plan (helps clear my brain and stops me from being overly critical of how much I am eating)
2. Do a mood log each day (for real)
3. Continue to take baths as needed to decompress, read a short story
4. Finally order the relaxation tape my counselor recommended (i'm not much into these sorts of things, but she had me try it a couple times in session and it really does work. and only takes 15 minutes. i think i can find fifteen minutes to wind down if I'm getting anxious)
5. follow my wo schedule

Ok! Onward!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISS_FIT_ 4/7/2011 6:11PM

    oh no!! sorry you got so sick!!!! emoticon

hope the relaxation tape works for you! and hope you back at 100% soon!!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JOJOMAGIC1 4/7/2011 4:45PM

    I hope you feel better. But you recognize your triggers! Good for you! One day at a time and you will do great!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NPA4LOSS 4/5/2011 10:27PM

    I hope you are feeling better soon. Just keep going forward and no guilt for taking that extra week. You are on the right track, life just throws us road blocks on occasion. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

Anti-stress blog #3- ahaaah.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Tomorrow the article is due in for my class- and guess what? I am only MILDLY stressed! Why? Well, first I was reasonable. I figured out that I can skim parts of the 400 page dissertation I was assigned to review in the article last week. I realized that the article is only two pages. And then I realized that it doesn't have to be perfect.

Next- I decided that I am working plenty hard. There is a lot on my plate- and I simply can't give it all my full attention. So just because somethings slide a little does not mean that I am not working hard.

Alright- short blog. Off to write!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NPA4LOSS 4/1/2011 11:07AM

    emoticon I love that attitude! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JELLEN726 3/28/2011 10:13PM

    Keep up the awesome work! Writing can be daunting process and seem overwhelming but you seem to be keeping things in check. You can do it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISS_FIT_ 3/28/2011 8:08PM

    stress is everywhere, everywhere you look around...... emoticon

in school i would spend all my nights awake doing the readings and not understanding how everyone else was sleeping- that's when i realized the art of skimming! i never learned it and was extremely unhealthy at school to get through the work. i'm so glad you are doing this and prioritizing your work!

if i get back in school this year i'm definitely learning how to do this!


Report Inappropriate Comment
C-MERRIE11 3/27/2011 4:09PM

    hahaha! yeah there really are- fro my part i joined the stress-busting challenge :) i guess i feel it would help me learn good coping skills. ive been really focused this year on learning non-food ways to cope with stress.... but i guess it can be a little discouraging seeing 5 anti-stress blogs all lined up? maybe i should add in a few pro-fun/ pro-relaxed blogs, too! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIME2BLOOM4ME 3/27/2011 4:04PM

    emoticon I am glad your stress is decreasing !!!

Why is everyone focused on stress? There ae so many stress journals. It makes me feel sorry for all those stressed people. Hugs. I hope all turns out well.

Report Inappropriate Comment

Anti-stress blog #2

Thursday, March 24, 2011

aaaaargh. soo much to do. cant breathe. yikes.

K- so today I did work for both my jobs, plus some reading. Plus our kitchen was a disaster so I swept it. And then I did some cooking and baking.

I dont see how I can do all I need to do. I really dont. I really need to find some more stress-busting techniques.

How on earth do you juggle doing so many things at once? Where none of them can be dropped?

I feel really confused. Either last week I was in complete denial and it was silly to be as cool and calm as I was, or this week I was triggered into freaking out about all I have to do. I am just not sure about how I should feel about all I need to be doing.

Guilty? Calm? Anxious? Frustrated? Single-minded? Busy? Relaxed? I want to feel relaxed, but then someone told me I should be working harder, which means maybe I need to amp it up.... Oh my...

Anyway. Another anti-stress blog that is gonna just be a stress blog.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

C-MERRIE11 3/24/2011 11:16PM

    thank you all for stopping by to encourage me!! really so sweet! i think i will give my list another look over and see what i can drop... the thing is i dont want to drop the things i enjoy just cause they are non-essential... hm... this process may call for a blog! thanks, all of you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISS_FIT_ 3/24/2011 11:13PM

    keep up writing about the stress- even if you can't come up with a solution, it may help to vent! i agree with princess_twisty! during my stress challenge i ended up giving notice at some of my jobs. maybe there's something that can be pushed back a little or let go of completely...give it some thought!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIME2BLOOM4ME 3/24/2011 11:12PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESS_TWISTY 3/24/2011 10:37PM

    Sounds like you're going through a stressful and busy time right now. But hopefully it's just a stage? And hopefully you'll be able to have some relaxation time soon?!
I think it's important to prioritise. Sit down and write a list of all the things you have to do...then pick the thing that's highest priority for you and do that. It's surprising how motivating it is to be able to cross things off a list!
And you're quite sure that nothing at all can be dropped? Or at least deferred until you have time for it?

Report Inappropriate Comment

Anti-stress blog #1

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

I have really enjoyed the official challenges put out by spark- I've already completed two. I have found them to be simple, but compelling and to the point. The sleep challenge really changed my life in some ways- I can no longer have the sleep habits I did before. My body actually became accustomed to 8 hours, and I can't fight that any more. The healthy cooking challenge definitely nurtured some mindfulness and intentionality about cooking well, even when things are stressful or when the budget is tight.

So I am really exciting to do this stress busting challenge. This is really the most daunting one for me since it really will prolly be the hardest- I know I a not the only one addicted to stress, can I hear an amen? As the hardest, I know it will also be VERY very good for me.

I am already trying to learn some of this stress management stuff, but it can be hard, and a short-term guided program with mini-goals will hopefully really propel me into another level of de-stressifying magical zenness abilities.

Right now I am in a time of BIG stress. I have a million forms to send into the grad school before graduations, and yikes! I still havent registered for the comps. I have a dissertation (that weight a couple pounds) to read this week, plus a paper due really soon. And thats just school.

Beyond school I am working two jobs, starting to help with my church more intensively (they found out my masters is in theology :) ), and I am going through therapy (which takes tiiiiime). Also, I am really excited about getting my ace certification, but its going really slowly with all thats going one. I was hoping to have it done before the summer.

My priority is to stay in zen-mind and NOT to panic about all of this. Just one thing at the time. My second priority is to re-focus my sleep habits so that I am in bed earlier and up earlier, since I have been a little lax in when I go to be and wake-up (dont get me wrong, I love setting my own schedule, but sometimes I dont make the wisest choices...). Finally, I want to figure out a plan that will help me do all of this but I am not sure where to start... wish there was a time-management challenge! haha :D

I am not sure how to make this a destressing blog- so maybe it will just have to be a stress blog for now.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINDA! 3/23/2011 10:48PM

    I may join this challenge after I finish the challenge I am on now (walk/jog challenge). I have always struggled with stress.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISS_FIT_ 3/23/2011 10:34AM

    so happy you are doing this! i love spark challenges too!i tried the sleep challenge but quit in the middle, will try it again next month!!masters in theology - that's so great!! the ace cert. will be easy- i promise! keep writing the stress blogs!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 Last Page