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Queen of Spades

Friday, May 02, 2008

Firday--I am better at doing things when my life is in full crisis. Now that I'm past that a bit, I'm having to choose what to do with my time. I got out of work tonight and didn't have my gym shoes with me to walk in the nearby park. So I went and had a bananna split and then came home and slept. Now my oven is full of dishes and I can't bake my stuff for my meals and I have no laundry clean for tomorrow. And it's 9pm.

I got chosen for the next project at the temp job, and I'm meeting some really nice people. My director in the last project was a really structured person and a good one to begin with. Only, I didn't realize that she was as structured as she was and how tightly she kept us reigned in. This one is a lot looser and really nice as well. I'm glad that I had the other one first as she really built some great habits to have, and now it's nicer to have this one. I'm also meeting some really, really nice people.

Tonight, I need to be patient with myself and do something, and realize that I won't get it all done tonight. Shucks! That's a bummer! While I'll have to deal with the ice cream, I also need to commend myself for doing the packed lunch thing today, because I really didn't want to, really didn't want to.....I wanted to try the lean cuisine, and my refrig was/is getting bare. I actually think that I have an orange there, it was for the way home. Only I got sidetracked at the ice cream place. Maybe I'll get it out and maybe I'll do a load of laundry, only instead of the small stuff that I don't want to fold, I'll do a blanket or the sheets. Nice big items. Excuse me for a moment, ok?

Ok, washed the sleeping bag and it's in the dryer. I guess my apartment is cold in the wintertime, never thought about it much because I put the sleeping bag on my bed in the fall and it serves as another quilt of sorts. Only now, it's time to give it a thorough washing and I did or rather am. And I got the pan out of the oven and washed it, and now I can make my soup with the left over veggies that are in my refrig. And I cleaned the oven door. Talk about baby steps.......

I guess I can also mail that letter, while I'm waiting for the sleeping bag to finish drying.......a short walk to the postal box might be just the thing for me to do!

Saturday--shorter work week, 52 houea rhis week, and this morning I made my rice soup and did my laundry. Next week, I want to have this done so, I can scoot out to swim. The soup is good.

Mom would have made her soup with tiny diced carrots and little small diced potatoes, lol......that way we ate it. She didn't even fuss if we picked it out.

Only I put mine in chunks, cause I wasn't going to take the time to dice them.

And I put it on the stovetop on lo, electric stove and then went about doing things. Cooler am sso ssoup is good.

I cut up a whole onion as well and dropped it into the pot. Mm.....just covered it all with enough water so that as the rice expanded, it wouldn't stick.

Ok, 40 minutes til I have to get ready for work, and the laundry is done, and the soup is done, and well, exercise time~~I slept through that. And I even just started doing the dishes without complaining and I have lots of those done, some even put away. hey, I'm feeling good!
Ok, 15 minute walk is good.

I wrote this a year ago--II did it, I'm in the 170's hurrah!!!great. wow after one year of being with and to think that I had to give up a 200 lb guy to do this, talk about a life style change..I gave him up on President's day 2007, and it's been 11 months now. I'm starting to go to dance lessons. That's ok. I nearly freaked out the first dance I went to, didn't realize that it was a dance night. First time someone danced with me I really thought I was doing something wrong.

Sunday evening~~well, grocery shopping tonight and I've always hated putting the food away. One bad habit that I've stopped doing much of the time is buying something that I have at home. Like oranges. tonight I was in the store and determined that I needed oranges when in fact I knew that I had four of them in my refrig. Then I have this mental fight with myself that says, that somehow I'm going to deteriorate if I don't have more oranges. Lol, as if my body couldn't snack on my hips for a while. Any way, I got past that tonight, and I got some grapejuice, and some watermelon, and some raspberries, and some celery. I also got some cottage cheese. I want to try the pancakes that was on this site with cottage cheese, eggs and flour.

Well at work I started a new project and the lady sitting besides me is an avid walker on the breaks. So, I've joined her, and our building is huge, takes almost he entire break to walk around once. I'm averaging two breaks a day, which is usually lunch and second break to walking outside. So, exercise is coming to me. Wow, talk about being grateful!

I didn't get my chicken baked on Sunday, so didn't have it for most of this week. I also didn't put dry cat food on my list. So, I stopped at a grocery store on my way home, just takes too much time to go into these mega stores for an item or two. And it will be three more days before my day off. So, I stopped, and I also got one of those rotissery chickens..a good buy for me cause it makes many meals. I'll measure out in baggies and ounces in the am. And the carcas, I'll add rice and the veggies from this week. It really has been a struggle for me to get my food in order, and I feel that I am getting control of it, even if this week has been a struggle. Today I took mushroom soup from a can, divided it into two or three styrofoam cups and added water to one of them and put the other in the refrig. I had one of them for my break, it was really good.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHY4ME 5/2/2008 8:29AM

    reading this and all you do, makes me realize I can get my ducks in a row and can get my meals more planned. Thanks for the entertaining, inspirational blog.

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Jack of Spades

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Hm....the Jack of Spades,

Saturday night, grocery shopping, got to be to work at 11 am.

Sunday night, got back from my grocery shopping, only I have to clean the oven before I can bake my stuff. Euch!

Sideline......did I do my part to support somone? I don't think so. At work, there are two up and coming people who are trying to become the leaders and they are tring to edge out another long term employee. I hadn't worked the day shift for a while and when I did work there today the climate was different, but I was busy trying to stay in the routine and I had some goof ups this week and I was trying to make a comeback from it. Anyway, I was out of hearing range, when I heard the older employee say in response to one of the wannabe leaders~~the long time employee said a bad word, in fact several, in front of customers. Only the wanabe leader knew what buttons to push. That was my take on it. I didn't have an opening to ask what thee details were of the long term employee, yeah, she should be responsible for herself, yet, being isolated in the work place is no fun. Update, I was wrong, she was really being a pest.

A different kind of reward~~consistency at getting my hair done and waxed~~not in the same places. I have been blessed with lots of hair, enough said. I have had six hair cuts with the same person and she has taken me from permed clown look to a more modern me. And my brows are actualy shapped to my face. It hasn't been a do this and then get this sort of reward.

Ok, cleaned the floor, and put my stuff in a pan on top of the stove. And my celery in a pan in the sink, breaking it apart and cleaning it. And eating it, what a snack!

I had one cup of coffee yesterday and 16 oz of soda today, will be glad to get back to eating healthy tomorrow. I stopped at a chilli place tonight and had a salad and a plate of chilli spaghetti.....I always go there when I'm trying to sort things out.

Remind me to put my remaining potatoes and celery and onions into the crock pot for soup..........It can cook tomorrow.

Rats, I don't like it on a Monday morning when I didn't set the alarm right, rather reset it. Uch!

Tuesday~~uch, my resident manager is wacky, and she does monthy water leak checks. If the owne wasn't on the propertty, I'd be looking for another place. I stay because I like the apartment, and Im' not sure that I can find another that I like as well. Anyway, I called off work to make sure my apartment is clean. I'm angry at myself because I'm reacting to her. She issn't professional. For breakfast~~apple diced, raisins, pecans~~sat down to eat it for a couple of minutes even though I'm surface cleaning, that's it. I like to deep clean, not surface clean. Ok, valuable lesson hre! Guess that falls under "Eating for a purpose".....onward now, rest period over!

I wonder what soy milk tastes like.

My dark chocolate candy bar is a good choice, I'm not abusing it and I'm eating only the squares that I figured for the day. Now, I want to reduce the number of squares by one. To three.

Well, with the temp job, I've been asked to work the next project. I'm glad that I used this project to get my eating into whack. Use to be, that if I packed, it was monotonous and I wasn't able to go the entire week, and this time I have.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHY4ME 4/25/2008 8:10AM

    Still doing good - great going!!!! soy milk well I used to use it when dh had it, but can only put it in my cereal. He has now gone to rice milk as he tolerates that better, it too only goes in my cereal. He says both are fine but rice was better.
Hope this new temp position is good too and you are able to keep up the great job with your lunches.

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10 of Spades

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Friday evening.
I found a park nearby where the temp job is. And I'm not working tonight at the part time thing. So, I walked a 1.8 trail with a gorge and a waterfall nearby. And there was also a Parcourse trail whre there are outside stations to exercise at. Awesome. I went on part of it. And one of the most memorable things was this one where you lie at an angle with your head up, extend the arms overhead and grab onto a silver rod and then bring your legs up as high as you can. Well. right, I need some practice on it. But the most motivating part was the view of the ceiling. Which was outdoors with the tree limbs and mere sprouts of leaves, and the clouds beyond. What a great reward after a busy week!

The lunch packing is going better. I just need to force feed myself a piece of fruit or veggies at the afternoon break. Will eat it after the first bite. But it's yuck until I do, so I head for the vending machine. Will work on this. I also figured out that if my lunch is packed somehow and put into the car, so I don't eat it in the middle of the night, then wake up about 10 minutes early, then I can get to the gym........and SWIM! What more can I say?

--Sunday eveningWell, I got my groceries, just needed frozen veggies, that was pretty much it. Now I need to pack my lunches, I think that I will focus on how many calories are in each day's lunch. And as for the vendingg machine? Well, I got some chocolate bars. I'll put a half or a fourth in for each day. See if that helps me stay away from there.

I'll better plan the meal thing. I had been going so hard for the three weeks, that I let up this weekend and went back to my old habits. but I became more aware of what my thinking is. One thought that I have is~~well, I've been doing well, it won't hurt this time to let up and give myself a break. I thought that each time that I went past my favorite ice cream places.

Tuesday evening~~I worked an extra shift on Sunday because they were short and tonight I called off because my body said, enough.

I also wonder if some of the feeling that I'm having is from a healthy feeling good again that I'm not use to. After a crappy weekend, I began eating better at work. My kitchen is finally stocked with healthy food, that I can buy quickly at the store, and I have the containers that I need for packing my lunches. No easy task, it has taken a long time for me to figure out what to do and how to do it. This week, now, it's getting easier to get the things done in the morning. Only tonight, the no laundry caught up, and I just felt different. Then I wondered later, if my body isn't feeling better and I'm not sure what that feels like. I need to clarify that, in that, I was really sleep deprived, and I wasn't listening to my body. So, tonight when I called in for the part time job, I slept. I'm refreshed, but I still feel different.

I bought 4 hershey's dark chocolate bars and one serving is four little squares. I froze them, and on Monday, I broke off the four squares and I packed them, only I don't know what happened to them. Go figure. I like tore my lunch bag apart. Ok, lol, I conceded, and said, the vending machine won........and I replaced it with one of their candy bars.

Thursday, I had a better feel for eating throughout the day and not eating during the evening. At my breaks, I'm eating my veggies at the first break, eating celery and carrot sticks on the way to work, lunch~~it's chicken and some fruit, and for afternoon break, it's some soup.

Now, I'll try watching my portion control by learning to eat slower and try to eat when I'm hungry. I don't know how others do that when they have to eat on breaks and lunch times only.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHY4ME 4/18/2008 9:04AM

    YOu are still doing great, I am so impressed with all the thought you are bringing into your eating. you will conquer the vending machine lol
I agree with that last part about how to do this when you only can eat on breaks ect. I have a supper break anywhere from 5-6:45 as there are two shifts then dont get another break till I sit and do my charting at about 10. So hard cos dont want to eat that late, but then get home and want to eat....
When home for the day, I do not too bad.
But trying to do the intuitive eating but sure isnt as easy as it was the first few days.
Now have a chest cold, something I dont get often but oh well. hope it leaves soon. I worked hard wed and thur outdoors so today a bit of indoor stuff then rest, relax, yoga, ssauna and gear up for Night shift on weekend. YUk.

Comment edited on: 4/18/2008 9:03:23 AM

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9 of Spades, lifestyle changes are hard

Friday, April 11, 2008

I'm eating a variety of foods and packing them individually. I don't like most things mixed. The bulk of my lunch packing is in the containers I use.

lol, I'm committed to eating right for myself, and right now that also means a really busy lifestyle. Anyway, I didn't buy cat food, the kind that is best for my cat's. and last night, my siamese was really hungry in the middle of the night. And he meowed untli I woke up.

Over, and over a know how that feels, those middle of the night hunger pangs. Well, I guess I'll keep my promise today and stop quickly and get their brand. My siamese will not eat and get terribly thin, I don't need that. And it's too long to ask him to wait for several days until it suits my schedule. It's th only time that they wake me up, otherwise, they rest besides me or on a blanket somewhere.

I should have walked out the door 4 minutes ago, but I havent' as of yet. I feel like a tire that has been driven hard for a long time. Now I see a destination at the end, and I'm wanting to cave in.

This is the 17th day of working two jobs and I didn't want to pack my lunch today, I wanted to stop by and get some things at the deli.
Then I looked in my cubbard and found some things.
It's hard to make lifestyle changes.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHY4ME 4/11/2008 9:33AM

    WOW 17 days so far, you are doing awesome!!! I can imagine how tired you must be. When will you have a day off or some time for you?? I hope all goes well with all this extra you are putting in.
thinking of you Cindy

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8 of Spades--successful meal planning and eating!!!

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Yeah!!!! Bravo for me!!!!! This is so great!!!!!

Well, I wish that i knew more about pineapples. I bought one. And I sat it in the middle of my kitchen floor for a couple of days. I didn't want to put it into my refrig, because I would have lost it in there. Tonight I cut half of it into chunks. And now, I need to run errands, so, how long will the thing keep after it's cut open?

Maybe not for long, because it is really good, I've been nibbling on it. And it is really thirst quenching, for sure!

I put it in a plastic container, and chunked it into bitesized pieces and I've taken it in my lunch on two of the three days and it's realy good!

Again, put it in my lunch and I had to do mindless tasks which required me to take facts and then use their judgement as to how to come up with the answers and grade them. There was so many to do, that by the end of the day it became a mindless task. So I came out and on the way home, a straight road with lots of lights for 8 miles, I played the classic music radio and ate celery. More and more of it.....I just chunked on it left and right.

My Saturday work schedule got switched around and I had an opening to swim and I chose to go to the other job and work some hours there. I also had a chance to swim this am, but chose to pack my lunches. I have a variety of foods and I've divided the foods into the days of the week better.

I guess I'm not trusting that exercise will improve my life.....

----I'm tired! But successful. This week I've worked extra hours and have been gone from 8am to 11 pm. And I have packed my lunch and supper each day so far and I have things for my lunch tomorrow. Yes, I've had a couple of milkshakes and a can of pepsi, but the bigger picture is that I've taken a combination of fruits and veggies, and the others at my lunch table are now looking at my lunch to see what the veggie of the day is. NO coffee from that is provided. I've cut way back. WhoHoo!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHY4ME 4/4/2008 6:30PM

    YAHOOO! and wow those are very long days, dont let yourself get too beat or this healthy living will be harder! I am very impressed and now since I am working nights 11pm-7am tonight and sat night, i will go get my brocolli, cauliflower, pepper, and carrot and celery cut and ready to take. i am taking enough for the 2 of us. only 2 on shift at night ( small nursing home 30 people)
so great going and good for you. I hope to have this way of life under control sometime!

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