Thursday, August 15, 2013
I'm not sure where the motivation went. Somewhere between life, rolled ankle and boyfriend's ruptured discs in his neck and I've been packing weight on again and forgetting to go to Bikram, and forgetting to do much of anything but go home after work, cook an amazing meal (generally healthy), and fall into bed.
Then on July 13, he proposed. Things suddenly changed with thoughts of wearing white and a wedding and planning. All of a sudden I'm looking at pics of myself going, oh no. And in summer, since I don't wear jeans, but skirts and capris, I forget that pain of trying to shimmy into a pair of stiff jeans and sucking in the gut to try to button them. So the other day when I went to get in my jeans, it was a struggle that I eventually abandoned in favor of the skirt (elastic waist).
So the hunt for wedding dresses has begun and lets be honest, I'm not a frilly, ball room girl, which there goes the perfect way to hide the bulge. Plus, we're essentially having an outdoor, yard wedding at the bay...so relaxed in satin is looking better and better....if satin didn't show every lump.
So today is my 29th birthday. And we're getting married on May 17th. I have less than 10 months to get back to where I was, at least comfortable in my skin, and ready to party it up in May.
So, starting tomorrow, back to working out full gear. This means Bikram yoga in the am, gym in the pm, or vice versa. Time to get back to working out, tracking food, tracking excercise, posting blogs and keeping track of weight again. I fell behind. It's been about four months since I was passionately doing this. Need to find that passion again.
The white dress? It might be just the motivation I needed.
Tuesday, October 09, 2012
It's been months since I posted a blog. It's been at least 6 weeks since I was faithfully tracking both food and exercise. And not that I'm not still exercising, but for some reason I haven't been able to get around to recording what I've been doing. So, where did my motivation go?
I'm starting to think it's been a couple of step process. First, we took a week and a half mid July to go on vacation. 19 hours straight in a car with little to do but stare out the window and eat crappy food. Back from vacation, I just start to get in the swing of things again with working out and yoga. And then bam, labor day weekend, I have the worst sinus infection I've had in years. It took almost three weeks to get over. And then right when I start to feel better, allergies mixed with a head cold hit. It's been a fabulous fall so far.
I'm so far behind in my workouts, it's not even funny. The upside? I'm still losing weight. The downside? I've got a Zombie 5k run on Sunday that I'm nowhere near where I should be. I should have been almost to jogging the entire thing, but I can barely jog for over a minute before I have to start walking again.
So, back to square one. Back to trying to get to yoga at least twice a week and back to working on building up my endurance for running. Unfortunately, it's just not in time to get through the race on Sunday.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I haven't stepped on the scale in over two weeks now.
I've been taking two Bikram Yoga (hot yoga) classes a week. And I feel like it's doing wonders. It was that jump start I needed to give my body. Don't get me wrong, I've been working out six times a week, but it was the gym. This is something EXTRA! I like the extra. I like knowing that twice a week I am doing probably one of the harder yoga workouts, with other people.
Clothes are fitting better. Yesterday I realized that I had accidentally dried my work pants (something I don't like doing because they shrink up a little). Apparently it didn't matter, they were still loose.
Recently there has been no movement on the scale when I get on it once a week. I'm over 10 days overdue in taking my measurements and 2 weeks overdue on weighing in. So each time I'm at the gym, I pass the scale and guilty look at it. Like that work project you know you have to do, but really don't want to deal with quite yet so you keep shuffling it to the bottom of the stack.
I've officially reached a terror point. So much effort on my part and the needle hasn't dipped beneath 258 in over a month. And with this new workout, I feel like I'm going to be disappointed the same way. Regardless of the need for a belt at all times with jeans. Because they are still tight in the thighs and hips, just very loose around the waist. And those work pants, are definitely looser, but not falling off yet, so I can only say that things are getting toned. But if I get on that scale and it says the same thing it's been saying the past month or so, I'm afraid I might get completely dejected.
It's not like me to avoid confrontation. I don't like having things up in the air, so I generally like to face them, head on. But you can only read the same number so many times without starting to wonder what you are doing wrong.
The boyfriend has made a good point. My body might be starving itself. I workout so much and my diet is still greatly reduced in calories (1600-1800) a day. However, Sparkpeople has recently switched my caloric range to 2250-2500. It goes against everything I've been taught to try to eat healthy fat foods. It's just frustrating some days.
So, at some point in the next day or so, I'm getting on the scale again. I'm just hoping the result doesn't make me want to indulge in a pint of Haagen Daaz when all the hard work isn't changing the numbers.
I just have to keep moving.
Monday, May 21, 2012
There are days when I weigh in and just get demoralized. Yes, my clothes fit better every day, and yes, there are times when I look in the mirror and see massive differences. Yes, I lost an inch and a half from my waist in a month and 2 inches from each thigh, but when the scale still says the same amount, it just deflates that high I've been on.
This past week I haven't been able to keep up with my nightly 10 minute videos for the 28 day challenge. It's been a few days since I did them. I broke my 6 times a week stretch of working out this weekend. I only got 5 workouts in last week. Do I feel a little guilty? Yes, of course. Mainly, I'm disappointed with myself. I was far more interested in taking naps in the sun and playing with the dog than actually working out. I think I can trace this disinterest back to my Friday weigh in.
It was a gorgeous weekend, one meant to be spent outside and doing things. We didn't hike like we meant to. I could blame the boy, but then again, I'm just as responsible as he is for not following through with our plans to get out and exercise.
Rain, pressure change and a massive headache almost killed my morning workout. It was massive internal coaxing that got me out of bed. Just 30 minutes. 30 minutes of cardio to start the day. I rolled out of bed and worked out, 35 minutes at the gym (15 on the bike, 20 on the treadmill), still had a headache, but felt better for it.
So today? How do I get back on the fitness train with a week separating me and my 28 day bootcamp? I get back on the bootcamp train. After work, I'm going to try all 7 days of bootcamp, not trying to catch up, but to teach myself a lesson. I can do this. The scale might be misleading, but the changes in myself are not. And the small changes I don't see daily, others do. I'm in week 12, now is not the time to lose my motivation and drive.
On that note, I just signed up for 10 classes of Bikram Yoga. So, if nothing else, not only will I be working out constantly, but twice a week, I'm literally going to be sweating to the oldies.
Derailed? Hell no. Fighting past it.
Tuesday, May 08, 2012
I'm on my 2nd week of the Spring Into Shape Bootcamp Challenge. 10 minute videos each day, along with 30 minutes of cardio. All in all, not hard. I'm already working out over 30 minutes six times a week. A ten minute video in the afternoon, after work, isn't all that much, but it's wiping me out that little bit more. It's also pushing me that little bit further. There is no way I can quit now. It doesn't take a genius to realize that I'm trying to make a new habit. How long does it take to make a habit stick? And somedays, it's just so damned hard to get out of bed. Especially when you've got the warm boyfriend cuddled on one side of you, and the warm puppy on the other.
I'm in my 6th week of AM workouts. I've been stepping up from 30 minutes, up to 45 minutes last week, increasing by 5 minutes a week. And yet, this week, has opened up with gray skies. My energy isn't there. I'm still convincing myself to roll out of bed to go to the gym, but my rolling out of bed time is varying from 6:00 to 6:20. I've had to drop my workouts back down to 40 minutes this week just to make sure I have enough time to eat and shower before work.
Can I pull some of the blame off the warm bodies in bed (puppy and boyfriend) to put on the these gray days?
Last fall I read an article about gray days leading to bigger health problems for employees. I understand this completely. Daily, as part of HR, I deal with employees, their health and more. I know that the gray days of winters can really lead to bad days for employees and employers alike. I also know both my father and brother deal with symptoms of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). Both find that light therapy in the mornings greatly help them.
Are gray mornings to blame? I'm thinking that at least partially, they are part of the reason. I'm sure that will greatly relieve the other two entities that try to drag me back to sleep for a few more minutes.
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