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Pride + Impatience + Frustration = A Fall

Monday, October 08, 2012

I was very self satisfied over the weekend. I’ve been in maintenance a long time and feeling confident that I’ve got this thing down. I’ve developed immunity to DH’s stash of junk food. I attended grandkids’ activities on Saturday and ignored the snack bar. I had dinner at Golden Corral with extended family and behaved myself. I got the report of Friday’s physical and all numbers are good.

After decades of disasters in the kitchen, my cooking skills have improved to the point that my stuff finally tastes better than Healthy Choice. My late post on yesterday’s daily thread said “balsamic root vegetables are in the crock pot and a pork loin is in the oven.”

Then the veggies refused to cooperate. 7 PM: They’re not done. 7:30: Still not done.
8:00: Geesh, what’s going on here? Darn tough old parsnips!

At this point I’m hungry and frustrated and mad and in my line of sight is a can of Pringles. I decided to have a few while waiting for dinner. Remember the commercial, “Bet you can’t eat just one?” That was Lays, not Pringles, but they were right. I ate the whole can. The result was that I didn’t feel like eating a full portion of my dinner which actually tasted very good.

This morning I’m looking at the empty Pringles can like a person with a hangover looks at the empty bottle of vodka – full of regret.

I accept the fact that I was stupid, but regret isn’t helpful. Lesson learned! I’ll be back on track today. I didn’t like the detour.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CELIAMINER 10/8/2012 9:44PM

    Thanks for sharing the story to help remind me that I'm human the next time it happens to me (and it will).

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WE_PA_FIT 10/8/2012 1:19PM

    HATE when that happens.

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NANCYANNE55 10/8/2012 12:10PM

    I do that same thing and don't like it, either. Just shake it off and move on!

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SHOAPIE 10/8/2012 11:23AM

    emoticon

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MJZHERE 10/8/2012 11:23AM

  Lol. What a funny road we are on. Darn old can of pringles. It is just when I am sure that I have anything down - patting myself on the back - that the big fall comes. I would think by my age I would learn. Maybe we reward ourselves - prove how far we've come - only to find those pringles still have the upper edge. Just don't try out the new Ruffles - ds brought some by a while back and they are still in the back of my mind for grocery shopping - glad they are expensive and I haven't seen any coupons yet.

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CATMAGNET 10/8/2012 10:00AM

    Cooking is definitely a learned art, and I know that each time out, I try something different with a recipe and learn something new. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad.

I'm sorry that yours turned into an empty can of Pringles, but at least you're back on track immediately! That's a good thing!

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LESLIE871948 10/8/2012 9:57AM

    There must have been some sort of planetary influence :). Hey, I did Great at the granddaughters party on Friday, but the leftover cake kept following me. I sent it home with my daughter and my granddaughter, then it came back with my granddaughter Saturday when she had her black belt test and then had a major meltdown. The emotional aftermath of that had me logging a piece of cake into my journal, then some other thing, then some other thing. It was the first time since April that I really felt like I had been Way off my own program. It was hard to get back on track yesterday. Real hard. My body was screaming at me MORE of those SIMPLE CARBS please please please. I had to go to bed early to avoid the kitchen. This is our life. You are so better than that can of pringles. I walked RAN 4 and a half miles this morning. Goodbye cake. Hello buff Grandma.

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WILLOWBROOK5 10/8/2012 9:49AM

    Oh, I know that feeling of regret, except my biggest nemesis is Edy's Slow Churned French Silk ice cream, which I no longer allow in the house. I can ignore it for weeks, but as soon as the lid is off and the spoon is in the ice cream, all rational thought is over until I come up dazedly for air. LOL.

As Suzymobile says, you are human despite being very strong about ignoring your husband's stash of goodies most of the time. I doubt I could do as well as you on that!

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WATERMELLEN 10/8/2012 9:38AM

    Potato chips do that to me: every time. Including the regret. And I'm sure will do till the end of time. I'm not thinking I'll EVER conquer potato chips (even though gotta say the old fashioned kettle type are waaaaaaaay better than the Pringles/Lays. Just sayin'!!)

Thanks for your get well wishes!

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SUZYMOBILE 10/8/2012 9:36AM

    No kidding, you're human? Sooner or later the same thing befalls all of us. For me, it has been cheesecake. Don't beat yourself up over it. Instead, try to have some kind of steamed veggie or Laughing Cow cheese or pickes or something lying around to pop in your mouth when you get hungry and impatient. Those who never make mistakes learn nothing.

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KANOE10 10/8/2012 8:03AM

    Keep telling yourself that progress is what counts, not perfection. None of us is perfect and you have made such wonderful changes in this last year!!!!!
I don't like the detours either, but you have the right attitude. Get back on track and you will have a great day today.

emoticon emoticon

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MISSUSRIVERRAT 10/8/2012 7:29AM

    Live and learn. Sometimes stuff like that happens unexpectedly. Yes, I am sure that you will get back on track right away.

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Mommy, I hope God is nicer than him

Sunday, October 07, 2012

That was the comment of my 4 year old son when he was lying on the couch sick one Sunday morning. I hadn’t noticed that his cartoon program had ended and he was watching a local preacher known for his fire and brimstone delivery.

Thirty-three years have gone by and our family still uses that phrase whenever we encounter someone whose advice is presented in an unnecessarily harsh, mean spirited, arrogant or ridiculing manner.

There are some situations where a severe approach is warranted. Marine drill sergeants have developed their tactics over generations of practice. Parents have employed “tough love” when demanding uncompromising adherence to house rules.

However, in the overwhelming majority of cases, a positive, supportive approach is much more successful. I’m not talking about false compliments or denial of a problem, but the wrong tone can make the recipient of the advice tune out the message.

I’ve only been active on SP a short time, but I’m happy to say that I’ve observed a general atmosphere of support and acceptance that is conducive to success, especially here on the Maintenance Team. Of course, in any online community this can’t be 100% true. The recent article on the healthiest frozen meals comes to mind. Some comments sounded like anyone consuming one or serving them to the family had committed the culinary equivalent of mortal sin.

We are limited by the printed word, devoid of visual cues. Perhaps it’s the striving toward a common goal, but I’m very glad to have found a place in this welcoming environment.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WATERMELLEN 10/8/2012 9:40AM

    It's so easy for "tone" to go missing from emails etc.

But gotta say: most of the SP community is extraordinarily kind and supportive!

And I do love your 4 yo's comment -- what a family keeper indeed!

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MISSUSRIVERRAT 10/8/2012 7:55AM

    I have found the Spark community to be extremely positive, kind, friendly, and supportive. It has been wonderful for me.

What came to mind with your preacher example was health celebrities that are like nasty drill sergeants, not mentioning any names. I just run the other way and can't understand why some people are so attracted to that unkind, over the top negativity. I much prefer Leslie Sansone's positive, encouraging approach. After listening to her constant pep talks as a background for her exercise routines (do 4 miles about 4 times per week), I think she is starting to brainwash me into being a more positive person. OK, I must admit that in the past I just plain thought she talked too much, but she is really starting to grow on me.

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MJZHERE 10/7/2012 10:49AM

  Very well said! I, too, was pleasantly surprised by the wonderful atmosphere at the Maintenance team. Great source of support!

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SUZYMOBILE 10/7/2012 10:43AM

    So well said! There are, as you said, contentious people on every online community, but it's funny how eventually they disappear. The old adage about honey and vinegar applies.

However, I have to confess to outrage over those daily email mini-quizzes that Spark used to send--along the lines of "Which [totally unacceptable junk food] is better for you?" I've stopped getting them, so they may have discontinued due to reactions like mine!

Comment edited on: 10/7/2012 10:44:19 AM

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CELIAMINER 10/7/2012 9:41AM

    "Belief in a cruel god makes a cruel man."
- Thomas Paine

I've heard there are some teams with very contentious members who make nasty, hurtful comments, so I'm happy I haven't had to deal with that. I did get a very snotty comment on a member suggestion I made one time (back when SP gave a point for liking or submitting a suggestion), and even though I told myself that woman was probably happiest when she was unhappy, the comment still comes to mind, or I wouldn't be mentioning it here.

As for frozen meals, there are some great ones out there, notable Helen's Kitchen (organic veg) and Organic Bistro. And I love that you shared the wisdom of your son that you've carried with you through the years.

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LESLIE871948 10/7/2012 9:41AM

    Ok, I was loving this well written blog from the beginning, but that bit about the frozen meals is classic. I am going to have to say that my mental view of those is that they are a sin and a shame for the most part, when compared to local real food. Then I am going to have to go on and say I am a sinner. I try to sin with Amy's meals or some other with recognizable ingredients, and I try to keep it to days when I am tired and overwhelmed by a very busy schedule. I have empathy for any person who needs to use frozen meals for whatever reason. And that had to be a good place for people who have to use them to find quality ones, right? I have been guilty of posting things that people get offended by, but I really try to tone it down if I have strong feelings. I am nowhere near as nice as God, but I want to go that direction! emoticon

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WILLOWBROOK5 10/7/2012 9:37AM

    Love your son's comment! Little kids are such crack ups. I am also amazed at how overwhelmingly positive and kind people are on SP. I have never belonged to such a consistently positive online community before. I really look forward to reading what people (like you!) have to say. I am learning so much and daily get little jewels of wisdom and encouragement.

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KANOE10 10/7/2012 8:51AM

    I agree with you..a supportive environment is so helpful. Your 4 year old made a good observation. I enjoy the support at Spark also. It is very helpful to have people who understand your weight issues...especially in maintenance.
emoticon

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WELLNESSME09 10/7/2012 7:17AM

    So sweet, it's those moments that make you stop and think.

Thank you for sharing! emoticon

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NCSUE0514 10/7/2012 6:30AM

    4-year-old wisdom could teach many folks a lot, couldn't it?

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Who you hang out with makes a difference

Saturday, October 06, 2012

I remember reading that the amount we eat is influenced by those around us.
That makes sense, but I’ve also realized that our image of ourselves is influenced in the same way.

In some yoga classes I feel like an old oak tree surrounded by young, flexible saplings, but it doesn’t stop me from going. As the “Silver Sneakers” group arrives for their session, I perk up. I applaud their efforts to stay active. As I told one 88 year old woman, I want to be you in 23 years, active and mobile and still coming to the gym.

I visit nursing homes regularly, a habit begun during my mother’s several rehabilitations and continued after her death. One day an old gentleman wheeled his chair next to me at the lunch table. He whispered “You’re one fine lookin’ woman.” I thanked him for that unexpected compliment and he continued, “You have nice legs.” Now, that’s something I’ve never heard in my entire life. Maybe his eyesight was failing?

I mentioned this to a female resident that I knew well and she told me that he was 95 and was quite the ladies man in his day. Then she added, “You do have nice legs – no varicose veins!” LOL

So, your perspective changes depending on your vantage point. All we can do is continually try to be the best version of ourselves possible.

Note: Grammatically, I'm pretty sure the title should begin with WHOM, but it doesn't seem natural to me. I don't talk like that. Perhaps because of whom I hang out with? English teachers feel free to comment.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSUSRIVERRAT 10/8/2012 7:38AM

    This is an interesting blog. I am about your age and have very active friends. We line dance together, walk, take aerobics, boat, kayak. That, of course is a good thing.

But I have also noticed that they are starting to point out the details of their infirmities and signs of aging. Personally, I try not to do this. I find all that talk depressing and damaging. I have had the thought that I need to make younger friends!

They also seem to be fixated on one-upmanship with dazzling us with their recipes/entertaining skills. Detect any envy on my part?? :-) That can lead to unhealthy eating and also seems to be a waste of time to me. I find myself avoiding social occasions because of being turned off by this.

Comment edited on: 10/8/2012 7:40:13 AM

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KANOE10 10/7/2012 8:56AM

    Good blog. That was cute about being complimented on your legs. I want to be in the gym when I am older also. I also feel like an old oak around the young ones at the gym. However, I enjoy watching them!



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PHEBESS 10/6/2012 7:20PM

    Yup, I want to be that kind of person when I'm 80 something, going to exercise class and having good legs, LOL!

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WATERMELLEN 10/6/2012 7:08PM

    The "whoms" I hang out with would never notice grammar in reading such a fine blog!! At age 61 myself, it's fun to notice that I'm positively decrepit in some circles and just a (relatively) young thing in others. Like you I'm determined to maintain good health!

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WILLOWBROOK5 10/6/2012 5:36PM

    Technically it should be "whom" but until you mentioned it, I didn't notice. Great blog!

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NWFL59 10/6/2012 2:12PM

    emoticon emoticon

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SUZYMOBILE 10/6/2012 11:00AM

    I am NOT going to comment on the grammar, just the sentiment. There are so many women on SparkPeople who I want to be in 10, 15, 20 years!

Too cute about the old gent with an eye for good-lookin' ladies.

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WILSONWR 10/6/2012 8:54AM

    Good insight!!

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It’s not where you start, it’s where you finish

Friday, October 05, 2012

That’s was the song in my head while running the other day.
Coming back from rehab sometimes it’s discouraging not to be going as far or as fast as I want. Many on SP get discouraged when the weight loss is not progressing faster. Sometimes you realize in spite of all your effort, your body doesn’t look that that woman across the room. Still we keep on trying to be the best version of ourselves possible.

We all started in different places and have our eye on a different finish line.

As the lyrics say:

It's not where you start, it's where you finish,
It's not how you go, it's how you land.
A hundred to one shot, they call him a klutz,
Can outrun the fav'rite, all he needs is the guts.
Your final return will not diminish,
And you can be cream of the crop.
It's not where you start, it's where you finish,
And you're going to finish on top.

See you at the top Sparkers. Have a good day

Note: It's Not Where You Start (It's Where You Finish)
Music by Cy Coleman - Lyrics by Dorothy Fields

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WILLOWBROOK5 10/5/2012 9:42AM

    Very inspiring! emoticon

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SUZYMOBILE 10/5/2012 8:40AM

    Wonderful!

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KANOE10 10/5/2012 7:57AM

    Good blog. Inspirational.

emoticon

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CELIAMINER 10/5/2012 7:40AM

    Thanks! I've been needing additional inspiration lately, so your blog comes at a good time.

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SWEDE_SU 10/5/2012 7:36AM

    emoticon

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RAPUNZEL53 10/5/2012 6:42AM

  Thanks for posting!

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Society in Denial

Thursday, October 04, 2012

Although I’ve only been active on SP for a few weeks, I have been quietly lurking for over 3 years. Lately I’ve been aware of the differences between the insulated environment of SP and the larger society we live in.

On SP there are differences in approach and disagreements on various topics, amount of carbs or other nutrients, intensity/frequency of exercise, and even the appropriate shoes when beginning to run, but we are united in striving for the common goal of living a healthier life. Moving more and eating the right foods in appropriate quantities are the methods we use to get there. We also realize that the ‘one size fits all’ approach is not reasonable and we find our own modification to achieve success.

Then there’s the world outside of SP, the world increasingly accepting of the new size of America.

We meet them personally. “You don’t want to be a size 0, do you? It’s unhealthy to be too skinny.” (Like that’s right around the corner or even an option)

We meet them anonymously through the resizing of the fashion industry. “Don’t worry, see, you’re still a size 10” (Even though you’re 30 lbs heavier than you used to be)

Finally, we’re beginning to meet them in print – the apologists for obesity, subtly denigrating those striving to change.
(Source: www.theglobeandmail.com/comme
ntary/surprise-a-little-fat-is-good-fo
r-you/article4560312/
) Thanks to Watermellen’s recent blog

While the title “A little fat is good for you” is reasonable. It also states that:
“Taking and keeping weight off is next to impossible” (So why try?)
“Entire empires – commercial, government and academic – have been built on our morbid fear of fat” (Looking around, we must have conquered our fear pretty well)

All of this has led to fat becoming the new normal
(Source: www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health
-and-fitness/health/how-fat-has-become
-the-new-normal/article4576071/
) Again thank you Watermellen for finding this.

This is reflected in the adjustments in our environment.
• Home furnishing companies make their products larger
• Urban buses need reinforced frames
• Hospitals re-engineer their equipment to be able to serve patients
While these are necessary to deal with reality, they also mask the problem

As the weight of our nation increases, our image of ourselves is changing. With 66% of us overweight or worse and another % struggling with anorexia or illness, normal BMI or slim people are currently an ever shrinking minority.

A generation ago America didn’t look like this. Scare tactics may not work but putting the statistics out there is necessary. Making us happy with the status quo is not helpful either individually or as a society.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSUSRIVERRAT 10/8/2012 7:45AM

    Excellent blog. Very thoughtful and interesting. Thanks for taking the time to make the entry.

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CRYSTALJEM 10/5/2012 9:56AM

    "Making us happy with the status quo is not helpful either individually or as a society. "

Very powerful point. I agree totally (aren't Watermellen's blogs awesome!). While I don't believe in being mean about it, or nagging people that they have to change (take the viral video/email about the Denver anchor), but turning a blind eye, saying that gaining weight to an unhealthy degree is the new normal is just as wrong and very unhelpful.

Thank you.

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JENNYR0506 10/5/2012 8:15AM

    "No matter what your weight, you can achieve striking benefits from eating well and exercise. Just don’t expect that diet and exercise will cause you to to lose a meaningful amount of weight, because (unless you are among a tiny sliver of extremely lucky and determined people) they won’t. For most of us, losing weight and keeping it off is next to impossible."

This was the whole quote on weight loss from the article "A Little Fat is Good for You".

It is amazing how quickly she can go from achieving "striking benefits" to "losing weight ,,, is next to impossible."

So many of us on SP have proven that eating a healthy diet and exercising DOES result in striking benefits in weight loss and health. We are not lucky but we are determined. And that is not a bad thing!

emoticon Jenny



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WATERMELLEN 10/4/2012 9:14PM

    Great blog! There's lots of pressure to accept being fat. . . . and to pressure those of us trying to be healthy just to give up.

(And: thanks for the shout-out!)

I'm glad that after "lurking" for 3 years you're becoming more active and speaking out!

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ROSEWAND 10/4/2012 2:04PM

    It is a strange new world out there. Even though
my BMI is around 20, many people think I am too
thin. 30 years ago, I would be perceived as normal

I, too, have noticed how the idea of just
adjusting to larger sized people is become the
norm in our culture and advertising.

I had the strange experience of going to a pot-luck
recently where there was nothing I could eat accept
what I had brought. What was there was mostly
manufactured "food", and everyone seemed so
comfortable with it. I feel as if I was in a different
country!

I am very grateful to this community of like-minded
health conscious people who are committed to
changing themselves and become a model of
what we can be.

Thanks for writing such a good blog.

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CELIAMINER 10/4/2012 11:00AM

    I really resonate with the clothes sizing issue, as I have in my closet clothes ranging from an XS sweater to a size 14 pair of jeans...and they all fit.

As for redefining "fat," I am happy that I can now fit comfortably in a coach class airline seat, that I'm not the one getting "why me" eyerolls when I sit down next to someone on the commuter bus, and that I can do so many more physical things so much more easily than I could 75+ pounds ago.

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SWAZY33 10/4/2012 10:49AM

    Great info :)

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MJZHERE 10/4/2012 10:31AM

  Same thoughtwave here - yesterday at the store, the sizes on clothes really got me going in this direction. Having recently read The Influencer, I was struck with how the two effective methods of influencing change are modeling (actual) and vicarious modeling (presenting an example so real that the person can put themselves there in the story). Unfortunately education doesn't usually work unless the person strongly trusts the source and is already heading that direction (according to the book and reinforced by my own experience - how often does "do what I say, don't do as I do" work with our kids). My mom ate healthy (from her own 1 acre garden mostly), and was still riding her bicycle at age 80 (with severe arthritis). She has strongly influenced me. Also why I look to those who have been successful here at sp and read their posts, blogs.

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SUZYMOBILE 10/4/2012 10:02AM

    Bravissima!!

Love this: "'Entire empires – commercial, government and academic – have been built on our morbid fear of fat' (Looking around, we must have conquered our fear pretty well) " !

I'm lucky to have found a little coterie of new friends here in Florida who are constantly seeking to become thinner and healthier. In NH, our neighbors viewed me as a freak and often asked, "Is Sue all right?" emoticon (A lot better than you, honey!)

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BIGDOG18 10/4/2012 9:18AM

  emoticon

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