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The Unthinkable. . .

Monday, May 30, 2011

OK, so its abt swimsuit season again and recently, like the last month, Ive become more comfortable w my body. I have gone from a one piece to a 2 piece tankini and now an actual bikini! emoticon I always had the feeling that if I didnt wanna see it then no one else does either. But one day something clicked. I think I heard myself talk abt my stretch marks from the 2 pregnancies and how they are 'battle scars' that I proudly wear. Well I never showed em, along with the rest of my 'middle' cuz I do have an extra roll and a lil belly and after all, "if I dont wanna see em, no one else does" right?! Well since then I wore my bikini top (from the swimsuit I wore at 200lbs before I got preg) w my swim skirt and love it! I feel so feminie and dont care what others think of my body. I even started tanning a lil - Im sure u can imagine how PALE my tummy is comparedto my FL girl tanned shoulders, arms and legs.

Anyways, I was looking for a new top (after all it was 4 yrs old and some of the stores in mall are having swimsuit sales) and started seeing all the cute suits. The green eyed monster started showing his ugly head. I want to be able to wear a regular bikini bottom! My skirt is a plus size, fitted for a few inches and then flowy as to not hug all the wrong spots. So I started looking at my body and the same idea keeps coming up . . . I have this pouch, this belly that hangs like from rt below my belly buttom to over my "ya know". I dont remember never having it there. While many chics worry abt the muffin top effect over their jeans (I do too now that I had my second baby - he stuck out way further than my first and I have yet to get back the flat stomach I once had) I always had the lower belly problem. Even went 'commando' for a few yrs bc it was embarrassing to wear high-waisted (granny) panties and the lower ones never came high enuf to not roll down under my lower belly.

So now that u know the inner workings of my brain on this issue - LOL - I started having these crazy thoughts. Is there a cosmetic surgery that would get rid of this belly? I know Im overweight and I can lose weight but the thing is, will this lower belly ever go away? If its possible and a dr says it can with exercise and eating healthy, then the thought would be brushed aside. I just feel like its been there for so long that maybe its something that Id need surgery for anyways once Ive lost the weight. Ive already been thru 2 c sections and a tubal, and I came thru those with great recoveries and yeah, not the same but my body reacts well to surgery is what Im pointing out. I would just DIE to be able to wear bikini bottoms or even bikini cut panties. I dont even want a FLAT tummy. Just a good bit of it taken away.

I know Im probably gonna get a variety of comments from a wide spectrum of reactions and I WELCOME THEM ALL!!! I really wanna hear anyone and everyones opinion on this matter. If u have had this lower belly and lost weight, what was the results of it? Did u lose the belly? Did u have to accept ur body for what it is?

Thanx in advance for being open and honest!


Intuitive Eating

Sunday, May 29, 2011

So Im abt 50 pgs into this book and everything in it sounds so basic. Its exactly what I was looking for. I dont want to count calories for the rest of my life, nor do I wanna have to live by all these 'rules'. Dieting my whole life led me to a very destructive way of living. It wasnt so bad in past years, but since becoming a stay at home mom and having 'baby weight' to lose on top of excess weight of my own, it got to be an unhealthy obsession. Several weeks ago I just gave up on 'dieting'. I gave in to all my worries abt gaining weight and made peace with myself.

I didnt know it at the time but I was starting the process of bringing out the Intuitive Eater in me emoticon I stopped telling myself 'this' or 'that' was bad for me and started eating anything I wanted. I still weighed myself but the number didnt have much of an effect as it did in the past.

So Im still doing what I have been for the last cpl weeks and adding parts of the book til I get thru reading this book. Im honoring my hunger and respecting my fullness! Last night I made a great choice and Im so proud of myself! So I was out getting a few last minute things for my daughter's bday today and at the checkout I saw these 6pk of mini doughnuts I havent had in FOREVER! (There was a reason for it before, right!?) Well I grabbed a pack and put it in the cart, vowing to eat em before I got home so hubby wouldnt know I spent $1 on it. (In retrospect it sounds funny, but knowing bills are tight I feel guilty abt buying things for myself, even if its a treat and only $1) On the way home I noticed I was full from just eating dinner before I left out to go shopping. I had a lil talk with myself emoticon "This is the diet mentality that needs to be gone! Doughnuts are NOT bad food - just another source of energy. U are gonna take them home and eat em when u get physically hungry." And so I did! Later in the evening the kids and I were watching cartoons and I got hungry so I reached for the doughnuts. Get this tho - instead of eating 6 of em like I would have done on the way home, scarfing em down in like 15mins even tho my stomach was full, emoticon I sat on the couch and shared em with my kids. They had 3 between the 2 of em, and I had 3! emoticon And I was satisfied - I had what I wanted and didnt crave anything else. emoticon Even better, Im showing my kids that there arent 'good' foods and 'bad' foods, that all foods can be eaten in moderation.

One last thing tho - Im still a slave to my scale emoticon The book suggests not weighing urself because it is just another diet tool to judge urself by and a lot of the time can affect ur moods but Im addicted to my scale! I think a good part of it is bc Im numbers person and likes to see changes. I weigh myself ATLEAST once a day!!! Ive been able to seperate my emotions from it a good 90% but I still enter the dieting mentality after I weigh myself. Maybe I will change my mind once reading the whole book. We will see!

Heres to a healthier life! emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KIMBIES1124 5/29/2011 9:12AM

    Thanks for sharing! A woman at work gave me a book to read about eating for your blood type that I found really interesting. It bases it on how your body metabolizes the food. I have always wondered why some people get heartburn from certain things that I don't as well as why some foods seem to just not stay with you long. Now I know! It also noted in there what kind of exercises each blood type should do. I found that I was eating some things right and doing some of the exercising that they suggest is right. It caused me to make sure changes...just like you!

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BHOLMAN1005 5/29/2011 8:01AM

    Great article

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JWAKJA 5/29/2011 7:50AM

  Great article!

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Just Stuff

Friday, May 27, 2011

So I finally broke down and just bought the book, Intuitive Eating. The library has it on hold like 5 times and its not even at the local branch. So I resorted to buyin it. Im eager to sit down and read it!!!

On another note, this morning I ate a sm piece of brownie (and I do mean small, like 1 inch by 1 inch square) cuz I wanted something sweet. 5 mins later and my tummy is feeling so nauseous. Is this my body tellin me no more sugar??

Nothin really exciting goin on. Been walkin regularly - 5 days a week now for 2 weeks! I wasnt able to this morning. My seasonal allergies are on overdrive and I was all sneezy and stuffy this morning. But last Friday and Saturday I didnt walk either so I think I may take these days off as a break. In all honesty, Im just going w how my body is feelin each morning. If I truly dont feel like going, I wont. If its cuz Im lazy and dont wanna get outta bed, I push myself.

Keep Sparkin, my friends!



Monday, May 23, 2011

So its like 930pm and Im hungry! Not 'Im bored, I wanna eat' but "tummy growlin, I gotta eat somethin b4 my tummy eats itself" hungry. emoticon So I think abt what the options are and something CRAZY came to mind.

Chocolate? emoticon Nope!
Cookie? emoticon Nope!
Cupcake? emoticon Nope!

Carrots?!?! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon YESSSSS!

I got the bag of baby carrots out of the fridge and muched on those as I finished watching a show on tv. Even crazier, I was watching "Fabulous Cakes". I love all the cool, extreme cakes but it doesnt make me crave it. BTW we have 2 bdays comin up May 29 and July 1 so I will have my fill these few months emoticon

Been feelin pretty good w this choice so I just wanted to share!

Keep Sparkin', friends! emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FREGGIEQUEEN 5/26/2011 1:54PM

    Awesome possum!

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SHELLEY81 5/25/2011 12:18PM

    i find myself craving "healthier" foods now that I've been following IE for a month and have filled up all the bread and cheese and salty snacks I've ever felt deprived of. This morning, when thinking about lunch, I wanted peppers and hummus. It is amazing what we learn when our body gets what it wants!

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LUCKEGIRL40 5/23/2011 11:13PM

    Excellent choice! Way to go!

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Back In The Swing Of Things

Monday, May 23, 2011

So this morning my alarm went off at 530am. Instead of turning over and goin back to bed . . . I got up, had my coffee, got dressed, and headed out the door for my morning walk! I havent gone in 2 days and it feels GREAT to get that morning 'me time' in again emoticon Im back in the swing of things!

Its not all or nothing . . . the little things DO add up! emoticon

Keep Sparkin! emoticon Have a blessed day! emoticon


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