Thursday, April 28, 2011
I have developed interesting views about my appearance. I am someone who rather than think I am overweight...thinks they are just the right size...and have thought so for a long time. Even the other day I held up a skirt I washed and thought oh man that waist is kinda wide, surely it doesnt fit. Ha Ha it fit alright...like it was hand sewn to embrace my belly.
Interestingly my ideas about my body changed recently...by accident. I went to a dinner party at my friends house. He has a huge mirror -full length on one of his walls. Not an average mirror but one that covered the wall, sounds tacky but it was placed on a wall near the entry, as to obviously be a guide to see how you look before you leave for the day. My friends apartment is small, and the mirror reflects an edge of the bar facing the open kitchen, and the living room. When you sat on one of the bar stools you could see yourself sitting - sideways. You could see what you look like sitting down and your body from a SIDEWAYS view.
I was horrified and realized that I was fat! No pics needed here. But as I sat on one of the bar stools I saw a wide person in the mid section. The leggings I had paired with my skirt wasn't too chic as well. My petite legs looked fatter in shorter in something that I thought I was masking.
All these years of checking myself out in the mirror STRAIGHT ahead went out into space. I even have a full length mirror in my bedroom on my closet door, but I realized that since I stand really close to it to check myself out...my perspective was skewed. You need a big mirror, wide and tall to catch you from near and far, sitting, standing, frontways and more importantly SIDEWAYS.
How could I be so wrong, how could I think I looked in shape! I wanted to hide...here I was thinking yea you look good tonight, to oh my god who the heck is that in that mirror, and so thats how the body looks when it sits, rather than stands.
Although, I was miserable for the rest of the night and wanted to find a baggy t-shirt to cover my body...it made me realize...honey, You're 5'2, 155 pounds, I know you think that you're doing a good job covering it up, mixing and matching to create that silhouette you think is sexy - I know you think that you're skinny, and that it may look like it from the front...but don't forget to look SIDEWAYS and LONGWAYS.
And that...my friends is the main reason I'm thankfully here. I think its a pretty funny story and glad I could share it.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Two days of eating well, two days of faithfully following spark. Sounds like a little but I've already learned a lot!
Sunday, April 24, 2011
I found these wonderful sayings on SP Coach Nancy's blog, I love these.....I wasnt sure how to save these for myself to refer to...which are great...so posting it in a blog, please refer to her page for more info she's great. SP_Coach_Nancy
"You either sacrifice today to reach tomorrow's goals, or you give up your dreams in favor of the fleeting comfort that's distracting you." Dave Griffin
"Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth."-Pema Chödrön
"We should approach training not as if we are trying to smash our way through some enormous wall, but as “a gentle pastime by which we coax a slow, continuous stream of adaptations out of the body.” ~ Ned Frederick
"Don't confuse a single defeat with a final defeat." Ilka, SparkPeople member
"Viewing exercise as a tool for living the life you want is far more motivating than thinking of it as a means to an end." Coach Nicole
"Your daily actions and words can impact more people than you ever realize!" - Chris "SparkGuy" Downie
"Most barriers to your success are man-made. And most often, you're the man who made them."- Frank Tyger
"SparkPeople turns that little light on in our heads, which enables us to see through the end of the tunnel." Slim.Jim2009 (AKA Mandy)
"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is."
"The difference between the mile and the marathon is the difference between burning your fingers on a hot match and being slowly roasted over hot coals"- Hal Higdon
"A true runner has the heart and the soul which does not have to be proved to anyone else but oneself." Dave
"The marathon is a charismatic event. It has everything. It has drama. It has competition. It has camaraderie. It has heroism. Every jogger can't dream of being an Olympic champion, but he can dream of finishing a marathon." Fred Lebow
"Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together" - Woodrow Wilson
"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great."- Mark Twain, writer and satirist
"Losers visualize the penalties of failure. Winners visualize the rewards of success. Dr. Rob Gilbert"
"Women are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until we are in hot water!"- Eleanor Roosevelt
Shut out all of your past except that which will help you weather your tomorrows. - William Osler, Canadian physician
You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. -C.S. Lewis
"Your weight today is not a a direct result of what you did yesterday." Michelle-friend and SparkPeople Member
"If you can run a 5K, you can run a 10K. If you can run a 10K, you can run a 1/2 marathon. If you can run a 1/2 marathon, you can run a marathon. If you can run a marathon, you can run a lifetime!"-Coach Lee
"Your Actions Create Your Life!" Nancy Howard
"Train to race but DO NOT race to train!"
“The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.” - W.M. Lewis
"Nervous is just lack of education" -Judi Wearing-my dear friend!
"Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it." Charles R. Swindoll
"Feeling un-motivated is what happens when you’re not really making conscious choices at all–you’re just responding mindlessly to various triggers in your environment, or operating on “autopilot” based on old habits and conditioned behavior." -Coach Dean Anderson-SparkPeole.com
"No weight is ever PERFECT enough to do the enormous job of CREATING happiness!" From The Don't Diet, Live-it Workbook
"Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most are the ones that define us." Deena Kastor-marathon runner
"To get something you've never had you must do something you've never done."
"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. " Martin Luther King, Jr.
"The best inspiration is not to outdo others, but to outdo ourselves." Anonymous
"We ain't what we wanna be; we ain't what we gonna be, but thank God, we ain't what we were!"
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". Dr. Seuss
"If a man really wants something he will find a way, if he doesn't he will find an excuse." Stephen Dolley, Jr.
“May the dreams of your past be the reality of your future”
“I hated every minute of training, but I said, 'Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion."– Muhammad Ali
" If you have one true friend you have more than your share."
- Thomas Fuller, English clergyman & historian
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." -- Confucius
"If you want to win something, run 100 meters. If you want to experience something, run a marathon"- Emil Zatopek
“For tomorrow belongs to the people who prepare for it today” African Proverb
"The will to win means nothing without the will to prepare." - Juma Ikangaa, Tanzania
"Human beings are made up of flesh and blood, and a miracle fiber called courage" -George Patton
"Don't fear moving slowly forward...fear standing still." -Kathleen Harris
It's very hard in the beginning to understand that the whole idea is not to beat the other runners. Eventually you learn that the competition is against the little voice inside you that wants you to quit." -George Sheehan
"You gain strength, confidence and courage by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face." - ELEANOR ROOSEVELT
"There are victories of the soul and spirit. Sometimes, even if you lose, you win." - Elie Wiesel
“Hope is the dream of a soul awake.” French Proverb
"If you can't fly, then run. If you can't run, then walk. If you can't walk, then crawl. But whatever you do, keep moving." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
"If you under-train, you may not finish, but if you over-train, you may not start." - Tom DuBos
"Self-conquest is the greatest of victories." - Plato
"The will to do, the soul to dare." - Sir Walter Scott
"Success rests in having the courage and endurance, and above all, the will to become the person you are. . . " - George Sheehan
"Last is just the slowest winner." - C. Hunter Boyd
"Run the first mile with your legs, the second mile with your mind, and the third mile with your heart."
"God has a purpose for me and that is to serve Him in China, but God also made me to run fast and when I run, I feel His pleasure" -Eric Liddel in "Chariots of Fire"
"There will be days when I don't know if I can run a marathon. There will be a lifetime knowing that I have."
"Every man dies, but not every man really lives." -William Wallace
"Obstacles are what you see when you take your eyes off the goal." - Luis Escobar
"Remember the second most important thing to choosing the right shoe, is choosing the left one" LOL!!!
"A lot of people run a race to see who's the fastest. I run to see who has the most guts." -Steve Prefontaine
"The miracle isn't that I finished...the miracle is I had the courage to start." - John 'The Penguin' Bingham
"Less then one-tenth of 1% of the world's population has ever dared to run a distance of a 1/2 marathon or greater."
"There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect." - Ronald Reagan
"Cowards die many times before their deaths, the valiant never taste death but once." --Julius Ceaser
"The five S's of sports training are: Stamina, Speed, Strength, Skill and Spirit; but the greatest of these is Spirit." --Ken Doherty
Ability is what you are capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it. --Lou Holtz
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." - Martin Luther King, Jr
"TRUST THE PROCESS"
Stadiums are for spectators. We runners have nature and that is much better. Juha Väätäinen, Finland
“Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.”
"You are only as good as you are on that particular day, at that particular time, on that particular course, under those particular circumstances." Coach Lee
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God" (Phil. 4:6).
SOURCE: SP_COACH_NANCY's Page
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Thank you for your random act of kindness...it means a lot! Today when I arrived at the gym for my workout, my trainer who seems so busy with so many other clients..made me feel great when she handed me a birthday card (my birthday was last week). It was a plain card that she had taken the time to cut and paste a little saying for me...
"I know you are making some very big changes.
Maybe they are not easy, perhaps even a little scary.
But changes are good, and they make life richer.
So take those giant steps for your inner self that wants to reach higher,
and all of us who love you will rejoice in your happiness and your growing."
My personal trainer (female) actually cares...to all you personal trainers or those who know personal trainers...this little itty bitty thing meant the world to me, it was personalized and totally unexpected, and a BIG motivator for me. She really wants me to get in shape and deal with a new happy life...I love it.
Thank you miss babakhanian, you made me very happy, the best birthday present.
Friday, April 22, 2011
I am trying again for the hundredth time, at least it feels that way. I keep thinking back to high school when I bought the new Richard Simmons weight loss book, can't remember its name. Doing the exercises in front of the tv, thinking oh yea I am going to get this weight off once and for all, be skinny and happy. I laugh now thinking about that day, cause I think I was around 120 pounds and I thought I was heavy. So many years ago but so many I told you so's..at least that are in my head. Yea you want to lose weight, remember Richard Simmons.... how did that work for you? It didn't..
The little voice in my head that I fight so much, reminding me...yea last time you said you had this beat, remember? Then I start remembering, and think is it possible...that it's just not possible.
This point in time, I've found Spark. Which I think is great, and fun to navigate around. I'm up to speed on my exercise, but can't seem to look at and study the food part...maybe it seems to rigid. You know how they say diets don't work...
I read women food and god, and it helped for a little while, maybe I should read it again. I did lose some weight, then I got too confident and ate a lot and thought wow I can eat as long as I swim three times a week, then all of a sudden I had gained back what I lost +1.
This time I have joined a chic new workout place, have a trainer for the first time in my life.....and spark. I remember all the times that I tried and failed, but I also have to remember the times I tried and won, albeit for a short while. I need to think about the way I think about eating, my meals, my life and where I tend to hit roadblocks. Maybe if I can do that...I can stop remembering and start designing my body into what it was meant to be instead of a history book.
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