Thursday, May 13, 2010
Week two of raising the calories to 1900 will come to a close tomorrow morning and we will see where the wheel stops spinning for a number. Last Friday I was 311.2 pounds of luvvin and I am hoping that I get to post some "what I have lost" images in tomorrows post, 309 is the lowest point that I have seen so far on the scale so anything under that and we have a happy boy. If raising my calories to 1900 I still lose pounds I am going to stick with that number until that result changes and even then I may stick to it anyways because though I have had incredible success with my 1700 calories I have been doing much more in the way of exercise since about October of last year and perhaps a change is needed on a more permanent basis to keep the weight heading south.
My wife weighs in almost every day taking a page from my book and she does not have a weigh in day, she just weighs herself and whatever the lowest weight was on any given day is what she calls her lowest. This way of doing things is awesome and honestly I do it too but for the sake of having a day where I post the weight each week I post my weight on Friday "for the books" so to speak and if I was following what she does I would have a new low weight because this morning I was lower than I have ever been. This is the bane of so many people that are trying to lose weight, you know, the having a day where we weigh in and judge our entire week off of that single number and for the most part that works but, there is always a but. BUT this morning I am lower and I will almost positively show a loss from my last Fridays weigh in on the scale tomorrow but regular fluctuation may stop me from getting that new low weight "on the books" because I have been less on Thursday than on Friday lots of times but Fridays weight is Fridays weight and that's what gets put up on here.
I have a feeling that I will be able to post a new low weight come the morning but crazier things have happened but man I tell ya I need a win this week because its been a couple since I showed a loss. Today I am planning on having a perfect day where my food and exercise is concerned, I am also going to go to bed at a reasonable hour to help me along with that new number because even though I am lower this morning than my all time low its not much lower at all and I would love to see an even lower number tomorrow. I am on a roll with the exercise this week and I say that because I have made it to the gym every day as well as a few bike rides after the fact including pulling my daughter around in our bike trailer and I want to keep that momentum. I only have one hurdle this week that I can foresee and that's on Sunday we are having a friend come by and we will be cooking out on the grill which is no big deal but the Corona's might be. This is a new lifestyle for me but I refuse to miss out on a few beers with a friend that I haven't seen in a while because I want to have a better number at the end of the week, Living life is why I am doing this and it seems silly to miss out on things because of the very thing that I am trying to preserve.
In summary, My week has been awesome with the intake and exercise, I have stayed hydrated and slept decent and I only say decent because I have been up later than normal a few nights this week but otherwise I am doing good. Sunday I will have a beer or three but what I am going to do to counter it is add 15 minutes of cardio to each day next week, I will add the cardio regardless of whether its one Corona or three and that right there feels like a compromise that I can live with. As long as I can keep the number good over night I will be able to post up some what I have lost images tomorrow as well as adjusting my percentage lost and total weight but I am very much not low enough that I don't have to worry about it, there is a good chance that I will break even or be slightly higher and that's to be found out in the am.
Keep on keepin on and all that and Thanks for following along.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
The next time that you feel like not doing something for your health whether it be a walk, a run, choosing the right food, skipping a workout or whatever I ask that you first consider the alternative. If I skip this workout it may be the beginning of a bad habit that costs me much more than I have in my pocket right now, If I decide to eat that way again the possibility of developing type 2 diabetes multiplies by some number that I have no clue what it is. Perhaps death is just waiting for the right moment to stick his hand in and twist something inside that will ultimately take us out and it can all start with a wrong decision. Now I am not saying that a single bite of chocolate will be the doom of you but can it be? can it be the snowball that starts the avalanche? bad habits have to start somewhere right? they just don't appear one day unexpected and unexplainable they are created by making the wrong decision too many times and ultimately end up being the norm in our lives.
I have heard that bad habits are hard to break and I have to agree with that statement but I also believe that if the bad ones are hard to break so then are the good ones that we create. There was a time in my life when I couldn't walk past the refrigerator without popping it open to see if I missed anything the first time around and I always seemed to find something to grab and stick in my mouth, always. Grabbing the gallon of milk from the shelf and taking a few chugs right from the bottle was a familiar sight in my house, we literally went through more than a gallon of milk a day and it wasn't because I needed that milk, hell did I even want it? it was just a habit and so it was. I have shifted my habits towards things that are better not only for my health but for my entire life as a whole because now a gallon of milk lasts a week, and I instinctively get up and start getting ready for the gym without thinking about it just because its that time of day. Looking out the window and seeing the sun shining instantly makes me think about a bike ride or heading outside to do some yard work and in the past all it meant was that I would need to start the ol air conditioner up or make up an excuse for why I wasn't going to join someone doing somehting that required some movement to participate.
Taken 5 minutes before this post was published, its the corner of our kitchen sink and I'm askin for it by taking a picture instead of taking them off and dropping them into the trash but hey! live dangerously I say!
All habits are hard to break and its that simple, and if all habits are hard to break then why not try and make all of our habits good ones? I know that it really isn't that cut and dry but why not try and make as many good habits as possible when its health that is in the equation? I have some bad habits that Wify really gets annoyed at as illustrated above and I know that I should stop doing them but I think that she knows they were and can be worse so she allows me to live when she finds the pear, apple and other assorted fruit and vegetable stickers on the corner of the sink, hey its an easy spot to stick them when I rinse the food off! The old habits were closer to eating an entire box of cereal or stopping at Del taco on the way home from work bringing sacks of goodies for the both of us home at ten O clock at night and the stickers on the corner of the sink don't look so bad when compared to that and that is a bad habit, but like I said they are all hard to break! right?
The next time that you are reaching for that bag of chips or into that cookie jar think about whether your hand is diving into the bag or jar because you want whets inside or if its just because of a habit. When you realize that its a habit and not because you need it recoil your arm empty and keep on walking, your ass will thank you for it come summer time when the shorts are being slipped on. In addition to that I would like for you to do something that you know is good for your health today, walk upstairs and use the bathroom up there instead of the one twelve feet from you, take the stairs instead of the elevator or drink a glass of water in place of the juice or diet soda. Whatever you did that was good for yourself, do it again tomorrow, then again the next day and keep that up until its a glass of water that you go for first, or you notice that you are taking the stairs more often than the elevator and before you know it you will have another habit in your repertoire but instead of cookies it will be stairs or H2O and viola! see I told you they were the same.
Every choice that we make on a daily basis is exactly that, a choice, some are easier to make than others and many of them are habits some good some bad but all are yours to decide which way to go.
So which side of the force will you choose young Padowan?
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
To say that I was worked like an animal yesterday where exercise is the subject would be an understatement and surprisingly enough I am not sore this morning. I woke up and decided that some calisthenics were in order so I did some push ups on the stairs in my hallway followed by crunches, dips and some triceps extensions with some dumbbells that I have at the house. My daughter and I went for a walk before school and though it was only about a mile and a half I carried the 45 pound darling for part of it and then we did some light yard work before I head off to the gym. At the gym I rode the stationary bike for 20 minutes covering 7.5 virtual miles and then it was time for some weights, I lifted for about 45 minutes and then onto the treadmill for 25 minutes. After dinner I gathered the whole family up and bolted the new trailer to my bike and we rode to a nearby playground to let the animals kids play for a bit, its just under 5 miles round trip but there are some very mean hills on the way and towing a trailer along with my 45 pound daughter made them that much more of a challenge.
A day like that when I was much heavier would have very likely left me dead...what am I saying, a day like that would not have been possible. When we got to the playground I was chatting with wify and thinking about how something as simple as riding a couple miles away on a bike to let the kids play on a playground was not a possibility a short time ago and about all of the things that I must have missed out on because of the weight. Its amazing how when you weigh as much as a sports bike that you don't even see all of what you are missing because of convincing yourself that its other things, anything but the weight. When I was heavier I hated the summer weather, the slightest up in humidity had me sitting in front of the air conditioner with a double gulp cup full of cherry coke in one hand and the tv remote control in the other trying not to move more than it took to push the button and raise the cup to mouth. Now I can't wait for it to get warmer out so that I can spend as much time outside as possible on my bike, hiking, playing with the kids and that list goes on for a good long while.
Not being leashed to a 20 foot radius and inside the house is just normal for people and yet knowing how it feels to have that leash on is a reality for me as well as many other people that struggle with weight, it truly is a disability. At 500 plus pounds we can trick ourselves into believing that we are living but other than the fact that we are breathing we aren't really doing much living because missing out on everything that is happening around us is more than depressing so its no wonder that so many people including myself get caught up in that downward swirling vortex. Why do we get to this point? how can someone let them self get that far gone? I was there and I still don't have that answer, its sort of like a little bit at a time and one day reality pops up and slaps you in the face and you realize that you need to turn sideways to get into the bathroom, holy $hit when did this happen to me? Pushing the limits of a 6XL shirt and starting to think about buying a 7XL? Seven extra large, say it out loud and you have to wonder just how big is that? I never made it into a 7XL but this size is out there and in my mind I was covered because what the hell is one more size when you are that big right? besides the big and fat shop carries it so I'm good to go.
I can remember sitting on the couch and actually waiting until the last minute to get up and go to the bathroom, or timing things so that I would only have to get up once and get my sandwich, the game controller, the giant glass of milk, hit the head and adjust the angle of the fan all on one trip so that I wouldn't have to get up twice. True enough I have/had a back injury that gave me more pain than if I was just that big and it was a huge factor in why I gained so much so quick but that's still just an excuse, just because my back hurt didn't mean that I had to eat like I was three people but I suppose that's all a part of it. We can't do what we want to and food is instant gratification and does not judge and takes minimal effort to get all of that tasty goodness down the hatch so its the last resort for pleasure and bamn! the next thing we know we are wondering just how far gone we are and contemplating getting surgery to force some discipline onto our self.
A simple bike ride to the park and I can honestly say that I appreciate the smaller things today more than I ever have, I can appreciate the effort that it takes for me to push myself up that hill on my bike without stopping for a break. I can look at the 350 pound woman at the gym and smile because I know the heart that it takes for her to walk into that gym day after day and bust her ass no matter who may be looking at her, or the 400 pound guy on the treadmill walking at 2.0 mph because that's what he can handle at this point in his journey. I know first hand the effort that has to go into taking on a fight like this and one hundred percent admire every person out there that chooses to take their life back and not just sit there hoping that things change but instead forcing things to change and not taking anything less than total success for an answer.
I look back at what I have done and appreciate the gift that I have given to myself.
Monday, May 10, 2010
This weekend flew by! I went over calories every day this weekend including Friday, We went to see Iron man 2 Friday night and it was at the drive in so we brought our own snacks which helped keep the calories under control but I did go over budget by one pear so not so bad when I say that I went over but over is over. Saturday night wify ran out for a sundae and I stayed home but the more that I thought about it the more I wanted one! a quick call on the cell later I was in for a small cup of mocha ice cream, at least I opted for the cup in place of a cone right? Then Sunday lets just say that I was over by about 250 calories and that's all I got to say about Sunday.
Getting to the gym Friday went as scheduled and as I mentioned I picked my daughter up from school on my bike with the new trailer that I picked up so the weekend was off to a good start. Saturday I didn't really do anything that I would call exercise besides making a garden bed in my yard and framing it out with stones and a land scape tie and planting some veggies which as it turns out may end up being bad timing. I planted 3 types of tomatoes, some green bell peppers and some zucchini but the next day we had high winds and the temp dropped into the 30's over night, luckily I did think to cover the newly planted veggies with some buckets so hopefully there are no issues. I was going to plant some watermelons at my daughters request but am going to hold off until next week for that with the week that we have lined up weather wise as its suppose to be below 32 degrees over night for a couple nights and this way I have a bed to make next weekend so more movement. Sunday we pretty much lounged around all day and I did absolutely nothing that I would call exercise but I am ok with that as it was after all Mommy's day.
My three tomato plants.
The new bed that I put in with the three zucchini plants and the two pepper plants.
Random shot of the garden and a birdhouse that lives there.
This morning I weighed in at 311.4 lbs which is .2 higher than Friday but Saturday I was down to 309.6 lbs and that shall be chalked up to fluctuation. I am planning to hit the gym kind of hard this week and see where I get by Friday with the new calorie range and a good solid week of gym workouts and if the weather cooperates I will add some bike rides in by picking my daughter up from school as we both enjoyed that.
Something did happen this weekend that was unexpected as well as a great non scale victory for me in a department store. Sunday we ran out for no real reason and ended up in a JcPenny just wandering around and wify saw a display of Adidas tee shirts and started flipping through them and said "Here are some 2XL shirts honey you should try one on" blah I thought, these will never fit me. My blah thought was because I have 3 of these exact same shirts but in 3XL and though they are starting to get big on me still fit and look acceptable, sort of but I did agree to try them on and I am glad that I did. These shirts were not in the big guy section, they were just on a rack in the mens athletic section and the regular old run of the mill 2XL fit me just fine and then I noticed the price, $14.99 per shirt, what is this madness? how can a shirt that fits me cost less than $25.00?? I ended up getting two shirts. I did notice that I could have gotten a 3XL version of this shirt in the big guys section for $19.99 and with that I seem to have slid a little closer to being normal sized.
With that normal sized thing coming up I think that I need to figure out a way to see myself for the size that I am now and now how I use to look but am having a hard time with that. Friday night while we were at the drive in there was a fella standing outside his car and as I always do I size him up and think "He is about my size" so I say to Wify "Honey, look at that guy there in the gray sweatshirt, is that about how I look?" you know, just for a second opinion. With a roll of her eyes in the way that only a loving wife can do she says "Ok, you are not allowed to do that any more alright?" do what??? I ask "ask me if you are as big as this guy or that guy, especially when you pick guys that are much bigger than you, You know that you are smaller now so just stop it" and I honestly don't see myself as small as Wify does apparently.
Why is it so difficult to get past weight? why is it that though I can obviously see a difference in how I look that I still see myself much bigger in minds eye? I am 225 pounds less in physical size than I was 2 years ago and yet I still see myself as a big ol round fella most times and I am unsure how to get past that feeling. I see people like Sean or the other Tony (links to their blogs are here zeusmeatball.blogspot.com/ )and they look amazing! I have been reading these guys blogs for a good while now and they also have lost more than 200 pounds each but unlike me I can see them and not think they look big at all. Its true that they are both at or extremely close to their goal weight but I am only about 50 pounds more than Sean yet going off of his photos I look much bigger. Perhaps its something that I just need to get use to, you know being smaller and accept that I possibly look smaller than my minds eye tells me because I honestly thought that the fella at the drive in and me were pretty close in size but going off of the look on Wifys face and her reaction my vision could be off.
Long winded and random for the Monday morning post but like every day I have no clue what I am going to write until I start typing and sometimes it goes long so there you have it. This week should be a decent one barring anything outside of my control and I am still focused so with a tad bit of luck and a whole load of hard work we will see where I end up come Friday for a weight.
Thats all I got for today.
Friday, May 07, 2010
Apparently someone was offended that I used the big bad F word in a post even though I did the typical #^%$^ instead of the word and reported my post from Tuesday. I was asked by spark to edit the post so I did, I get it rules is rules is rules BUT I may start posting most of my posts on my blogspot page only in the near future all the same.
I write my blog from my perspective in my words and for someone to actually get offended at what was there is childish to me and to actually taddletale...er report an "implied" big bad adult word that starts with a F...... silly is my opinion.
A lot of you know that I post on my blogspot page Here zeusmeatball.blogspot.com/ and that's where I started my blog and I cross post here on spark because I have made plenty of friends here and its cool that people can take from my experiences positive things, if anyone is interested in the uncensored me please take a look.
The blog in question was one of the "Voted Popular Blog Post" blogs also, just wanted to toss that in there.
~~Todays post actually starts here~~
Weighing in this morning I realized that sometimes no matter what I do that the weight will do what its going to do and worrying about it is a waste of my time as long as I know that I am doing what I need to. I am down 225 pounds from day one and most of that time the weight fell in a downward direction, there were ups here and there but as long as I did what I needed to and stuck to my guns it has come off, this week I do not have a new low weight, in fact I am 2 pounds higher than my lowest weight coming in at 311.2 pounds. Am I gonna sweat a 2 pound up from my lowest point? not even for a second, especially knowing that it was a 6 pound up in the beginning of the week, my weight has been all over the place the last few weeks and part of that I understand and this week will be different and I predict a new low come next Friday.
I have bumped up the work in the gym a bit, I am not spending any more time at the gym but I did up the intensity level of everything that I do, on the bike I have brought my average rpm's up, the treadmill the mph and incline have increased and the arc trainer's strides per minute are higher now. Eating 1900 calories in place of 1700 has got me nervous but I have to at least give it a chance before I go back to the lower number because I should be able to drop the pounds with a 1900 calorie budget.
This afternoon I will get a ride into my day on my bike because I picked up a kids bike trailer off of craigslist to see if my daughter will let me pull her to school in it and I have to give it a test ride. My daughter weighs 45 pounds and then whatever the trailer weighs, that paired with the hills that I live on I am not sure that I will actually be able to pull her all the way to school but its a way to sneak free exercise into my days so I gotta try it out.
Wify gets frustrated at me from time to time, and that means on a daily basis because she says that I don't finish things, and that's not what you might think. I have a habit of leaving the last bite of something in the box like cereal, I will not finish a box, I always leave a bit in the bottom and then it sits there until she tosses it or one of the kids wants a handful of cereal. I leave the silverware in the strainer after putting all of the rest of the dishes away and I leave tiny bits of jelly and peanut butter in the jars, I do this with lots of things and she was frustrated one evening and we were talking about this phenomenon and I said "you should be happy with the 97% that I do, a lot of husbands don't even do that" ok that was a bad idea but I said it. Since then we have joked about this 97% thing that I do and I was thinking about my weight loss and it dawned on me that I am almost there and this last few pounds that I need to lose may just be that last bit of jelly in the jar or the silverware sitting in the strainer but on a different level.
I have a ways to go before I am at my goal weight but getting there is my priority one right now and nothing will stop me from running through that finish line with the tape across my chest. Eat well, Drink much and move often is the plan, I am 225 pounds into this and I have this thing that I do where I am mister 97% but this time I am not stopping at 97, I'm going all the way because I have to.
I think that I just became mister 100%...
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