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Run Forrest!! Run!!! er...I mean walk??

Thursday, December 03, 2009

Tomorrow I weigh in, This weigh in will be the official starting point weight for my goal to be under 300 pounds by April 2nd and I am hoping to see at least 334 on the scale because when I figured my pounds per week to lose I included this week from a 336.4 start weight mid week. I have done my part this week and expect to see at least the 2 pounds needed for me to stay on track with my new goal, I have been to the gym every day this week and am following my intake plan barring the few Hershey kisses that I had Tuesday night so its been a good week so far.

My trip to the gym yesterday was interesting, Wednesdays are usually an off day for me because I work my legs with the weights on Tuesday but I decided that I wanted to go anyways. I rode the bike for 25 minutes and then planned to walk on the treadmill for 20 minutes more, a nice easy work out but I ended up running intervals on the treadmill for 30 minutes, or should I say attempted to run intervals. After a warm up walk for 5 minutes I ran the first interval but I have no clue how long it took me because I wanted to see if I could run a quarter of a mile without stopping, and I did! I was not expecting to be able to do it but I did and could have gone further, I had the treadmill set at 5.7 mph while I was running and it felt good. Slowing down I walked at 3.5 mph for the next quarter mile but I had taken a big drink of my water so when I started the next interval I got a cramp on my right side towards the back of my ribs, blah! so I only ran for about a minute and a half and started walking again and ended up doing that again about 5 minutes later so when I say that I ran intervals I mean that I ran once and then tried to run two more times but I cramped after that first interval so I just walked the rest of the time. My legs were getting a bit fatigued right from the start of my workout and I think that it was because of the weight lifting on Tuesday, it is what it is and from now on if I decide to do a leg workout I will take it easy the following day so that doesn't happen again.

With that it is time for me to start getting ready to go to the gym so I will keep this one short, Tomorrow we will find out if I am off to a good start with my 300 goal and another week bites the dust. Thanks for following along with my story and always remember that it is you who makes the decisions, You are the one that decides if its time to do what you need to do.

You may now return to your regularly scheduled program...

As Ever

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SIMPLE_TAILOR 12/5/2009 8:55AM

    I find that everytime that I try to run, I can run farther each time without getting winded. There are other pains, but not exhaustion.

Keep it up!!!

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IZZYBEBOP 12/4/2009 9:25AM

    emoticon Good luck at the weigh in. I hope you see what you're expecting to see.

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SNEAKYGREG 12/4/2009 8:20AM

    Great job on the running. When that cramp hits try taking several slow really deep breaths, sometimes it is your diaphragm and that will work it out.

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NEXTYEAR 12/3/2009 7:11PM

    emoticon Great workout! emoticon

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    Awesome job! A quarter of a mile without stopping! Isn't it amazing what our bodies can do sometimes??

Best wishes on your weigh in!

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VEMAN1 12/3/2009 3:04PM

    Great job! Continue working the goals no matter what the scale says. It is only a number. Don't get discourage. I've been stuck for the last two weeks at 244. Your goal is admirable.

Again, best of luck tomorrow.

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CGREEN717 12/3/2009 2:47PM

    Great job. I'm trying to work my up to running too. However, I don't have that courage yet. I'm doing little jogs. So, keep it up.

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    Whoo Hoo - great job!!! Oh Gawd, I remember how hard running was at the beginning. It really does get easier, and you'll still have good days and bad days! Great job on the intervals!! I'm so excited for you!

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DACIUS 12/3/2009 1:02PM

    Your abs, obliques and back muscles work a lot when you run. Those cramps will subside eventually. Big kudos to even attempting to run after a leg workout. The next day my legs feel like something you would buy in the play doh section of the toy store.

I am normally outa commision for two days after my lef workout. Day after my legs are jello, day two they are so sore it hurts to walk. But I love day 3. They are strong as ever!!! I normally run my 10 miles run on that day three. Because my legs feel crazy strong and I am well rested from the days off.

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NNZOOM 12/3/2009 12:35PM

    I try to run some on the treadmill... that lasts for, oh, about 30 seconds!!! (actually, I have gotten up to doing one lap at a run... but that about kills me!) Great job! By the way... you LOOK FANTASTIC!!!

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CARLA393 12/3/2009 11:57AM

    Awesome job! I want to incorporate running into my workout eventually, when it isn't even challenging to walk anymore. It will probably be a while, but that's so exciting you were able to do 1/4 of a mile without stopping. What an accomplishment.

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CAROLYN1213 12/3/2009 11:42AM

    Way to go on the running!!! Every attempt at improving endurance, speed and/or strength is commendable. Hope you are rewarded for your effort in your weigh in!

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SGRONOW1 12/3/2009 10:52AM


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SGRONOW1 12/3/2009 10:46AM


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EUGENERUGOSA 12/3/2009 10:41AM

    Good luck w/ your weigh in tomorrow.

Isn't it exciting when we reach goals we did not even know we had set? That is awesome you ran 1/4 mile w/out stopping!!!!! I just recently ran 1/2 mile w/out stopping & have now incorporated that into my intervals on the treadmill. (btw...I love the couch to 5k running plan for my interval work)

Just proves if we give our bodies the chance..they can accomplish everything we want them to do!



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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Weight loss IS a mental game, don't believe me? then read here.

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

If you convince yourself that everything is ok it is easy to believe, as simple as that you go on day after day accepting things the way that they are without challenging a single one of them. At 534 pounds things are viewed differently than they are at even 330 pounds, excuses are made and become the normal life of you, missing things and unable to participate in even the most remedial activities is just how it is, That is no way to live, especially when fixing the issues is as easy as it really is, confused yet? I am not saying that it is an easy task because its not but what needs to be done really is simple but until we are willing to wrap ourselves in it and accept that we are weaker than we would like to believe at those extreme weights we may as well as consider ourselves chained down because realistically the two are comparable.

Where once there was the drive to ding the next level in a video game, or maybe attempting to convince everyone that you are just a large framed big boned all muscle under the padding not so much of a fat dude as you are just a little rotund is now a feeling of accomplishment because you ran for 3 minutes straight without stopping, or waking up and instead of the first thought in your head being "How big of a breakfast can I eat and make my wife believe that its reasonable" reasonable for what? a show horse? the thoughts are now closer to "Man I can't wait to get to the gym and try and run for 5 minutes straight" when a good deal of weight is dropped mindsets change, I should say that when any weight is dropped the way we think is completely different than when we are use to dealing with failure.

Why do we fail? what is it that makes weight loss so hard? We fail because we give up when we don't see results instantly and it is hard I believe because anything worth doing or having comes with some effort, which is a simplified look at it but basically how I feel. Again I can only speak for myself but I know that when I do my part most times I come out where I want to be and the times that I slack I know that the weigh in at the end of the week suffers somewhat. With that said I have to say that as long as we are honest with ourselves and at the end of the day accept our efforts for what they actually are instead of the fog and mirrors that we at times put up for others, you know what I mean "I ate perfectly today all within my calories and balanced to boot! I am amazing!" yeah except for that coffee this morning with the extra cream in it and the hand full of M&M's that I snuck out of the community dish at work, oh and then there was that....and on and on and on. We have to take responsibility for what goes into our mouths as well as the effort that is put into exercise because if we don't we are only hurting our own efforts and really just letting ourselves down before we have even had a chance to get a leg up.

The bottom line is that this health game is not easy for mAny of us and the weight loss game has proven to be seemingly impossible for others but we must remain diligent if we are to reach the goals that we strive for. We will slip, we will have perfect days, we will have victories as well as defeats along the way but the things that need to stay true are the determination, drive, willpower and plain old desire to get where we want to with our weight and health, make it a lifestyle and I promise you that it gets easier to pass on that extra piece of cake or the 12oz steak which use to be a 16 oz steak for me and is now a 6 oz steak when I do treat myself on those very rare occasions to some red meat, but when we expect to eat healthy and it just is what we have become then the effort eases and soon you will find that you want a glass of green tea instead of a super big gulp Dr. Pepper.

I now eat a carrot and it tastes sweet to me, and a regular cola is way too sweet for me to enjoy, I use to drink at least a 2 liter of soda per day probably more and now just the thought of that makes me cringe. I am the guy that because Whoppers were a buck the question came up "hmmm I wonder how many I can put away" my friend was buying and that number was 8 before I couldn't go any more and now the thought of eating at a fast food restaurant is so foreign to me that even my daughter asked me what the store was called as she pointed at Mcnasty's Golden arches, we just don't eat there, and its because the habit is now to eat something healthy instead of places like that.

The mental part of weight loss is the key, once we can get into a frame of mind that allows us to clearly see that we were not meant to sit on our asses all day while shoveling greasy food down our throats we will be a step in the right direction and the rest seems to fall into place. Eating high fat foods all willy nilly while sitting on our rumps is bad and refocusing on getting some movement into each and every day while making good choices with our intake is a must if we are to take control of our futures, if not? our futures will surely be shorter than they have to be.

Do you have the self control to take your life back?

As Ever

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOVINGMYSELF101 12/28/2009 10:13PM

    Thanks for taking the time to write this.


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ALLISON4EG 12/22/2009 11:52PM

    great blog!

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TULIPDAISYROSE 12/21/2009 7:12PM

    Amen! I needed your blog for sure today. I had a rough day where I gave in (first time in 6 months) and I have to realize my binge is to be a learning experience and not the end of my new healthy behaviors I've worked to establish for half a year! Thank you for the boost! Debbie

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LYNN-LOVESLIFE7 12/20/2009 2:14AM

You hit it all on the head for me.. Very well put. I will make sure I keep in touch with you and your blogs.. You gave hope, and answers.. I'm a mother who is on a mission, and that mission is achievement.

Thank you.....

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DONNA753 12/19/2009 7:51PM

  nice blg...

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LUCKY8GAL 12/19/2009 5:00PM

    Really awesome blog!

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MARCYNA 12/19/2009 6:50AM

    Lovely and encouraging emoticon emoticon
Maybe Love too is 90%mental and 10%physical (My idea)

Comment edited on: 12/19/2009 6:51:27 AM

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ANGELGRLKAS29 12/17/2009 1:04PM

    This is a great kick-in-the-pants kind of blog that we all need sometimes!

We are definitely an instant gratification kind of people. I know I have to work very hard to remember that I didn't put all of this weight on overnight, so it isn't going to come off overnight either. This is one reason I take my measurements and don't just rely on the scale to show me progress! :)

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SOOKIE 12/17/2009 10:42AM

    yup, 90% mental, 10% physical is my thought!

thanks for the blog!

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YOOVIE 12/16/2009 10:43AM

    You are such a wonderful writer! Thank you as always!

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SARABUT09 12/16/2009 5:39AM

  Nice blog. This gives me the inspiration I need to continue on to a healthier me. Thanks.

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SECRETMUSIC 12/7/2009 10:21AM

    You are SO right! Thanks for blogging!

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AXISLADY 12/6/2009 11:58PM

    Very well spoken. Haven't checked your blogs in awhile, but you have been so successful! Attitude, Attitude! If you don't have the attitude you can do it, it's difficult.

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VEMAN1 12/3/2009 3:08PM

    Very well done!

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JBMT08 12/3/2009 2:06PM

    Botzzzz!!! LOVE YOUR POST!!!!! I needed to read this today. right now. LOVE the Ronald McDonald pic! b/c THAT is what happens when you frequent "Mcnasty's Golden arches" (I LOVE THAT NAME BTW!!!) Thank you for sharing your thoughts every single day! You educate more people on a daily basis that you may even realize.....

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LLINDALOU 12/3/2009 10:31AM

    Another good one...
And love the Ronald McDonald! That's the reality of McDonalds


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HAPPYSOUL91 12/3/2009 10:07AM

    Botzzz this is one great post. Love what you said:

but the things that need to stay true are the determination, drive, willpower and plain old desire to get where we want to with our weight and health....

You have changed and will continue to change and I for one will be here cheering you forward! emoticon

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SIMPLE_TAILOR 12/3/2009 8:57AM

    WOW!! To hear about some of those comparisons, it is crazy to think about how different you are now.

I know that I am different now, but I just need to reinforce a bunch of stuff. Stress is really leading a charge at me and I am starting to feel like I am heading over a cliff and I just can't stop.

Thanks for inspiring. I think I just found that tree root to grasp.


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LISAMG1220 12/3/2009 7:31AM

    I read this and honestly it gave me cold chills. I have said similar things to myself and others. You WILL succeed if you can beat that mental barrier. You WILL go far if you have the drive and determination. If you THINK for one moment that you can't do it, you won't. I used to be that person. I would lose 20-30 lbs and look at my self in the mirror and see that my belly was still a wiggly giggly mess and I would think.....why in the heck am I still trying for if this darn thing is not going to go away? That happened to me 3 yrs ago when I had lost 25 lbs. I gave up and gained over 30 back. I will not let the mental think do that to me any more. This time it is more than just losing the is about that and being happy, feeling better about myself, being more positive about everything, etc etc. I am PROUD of myself and what I have accomplished so far. Being proud of myself is a first for me! I don't think "I can't do that b/c i'm fat" anymore. If I think I can't do something....I try it anyhow. 9 times out of 10 I can do it. Thank you for the Blog my friend. It was an amazing read. Hugs~Lees

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TLEE01 12/2/2009 11:23PM

    This one made me think. Thanks

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SNEAKYGREG 12/2/2009 9:57PM

    Well yeah what he said. I wish I had said all that great blog dude

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CAROLYN1213 12/2/2009 5:01PM

    Why, yes I do have the self control to take my life back! It is a choice everyday, every meal I prepare and pack in my lunch box, . . . every time I show up at the gym I am saying I want it and I'm worth it. Right now, I am hungry for that exercise high and the health benefits I feel from eating well.

Thanks for a fabulous blog about determination and comitment!

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GLOBALKEEWEE 12/2/2009 12:46PM

    "because anything worth doing or having comes with some effort"
I agree completely. Unfortunately many people don't see themselves as worth it. Else they think that the effort is just too much - which anyone succeeding can atest is alot, but it certainly is not as horrible as I imagined!

Thanks for another making another internal monologue public.
You rock.

Comment edited on: 12/2/2009 12:47:25 PM

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LOVEANGELS37 12/2/2009 12:41PM

    You hit the nail on the head with this one!! emoticon blog!!

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LOVEANGELS37 12/2/2009 12:40PM

    You hit the nail on the head with this one!! emoticon blog!!

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THEBOOKBINDER 12/2/2009 12:06PM

    Thank you so much for this story, so very true. I struggle with the mental part the most, the addiction. I find that it was easier to quit Smoking than it was to quit eating junk food. I have not Smoked a cigarette in almost one year but the junk food is so much harder to break.

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DDKITTYP1MP 12/2/2009 12:00PM

    I really, truly believe that the mind is where the battle is either lost or won. The mental aspect of it is so huge...I am slowly retraining my brain to think the way it needs to in order for me to be healthy. And the battle will be won soon emoticon

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MARLA_S 12/2/2009 11:57AM

    I completely agree with you!! I know that sometimes I'm bummed when I don't lose a pound or more in a given week. Then I have to look back at what I did (or didn't do) and ALMOST always, it makes sense why I didn't lose like I wanted to. Being responsible and accountable means that you don't have to ever be a victim to the scale! Success is, like you said, a matter of burning more calories than you take in. :)

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MSNICHOLS39 12/2/2009 11:39AM

    Your ability to write about your weight struggle is a gift.
Andrea emoticon

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LAURIE5658 12/2/2009 11:36AM

    Sometimes I need to take a deep breath, sit and actually think about how far I have come in my Spark journey. I now crave fresh fruits and vegetables. Crap food makes me feel like…well…crap. I hate that funny feeling you get in the head when you eat crap. I think about all the Miller Lites I consumed and how many wasted crap calories I consumed with the beverage. I think about how crappy I felt the next morning. I think about sitting on the couch being the best couch tater I could possible be. I think about how crappy that felt.

Now I feel alive, thin and healthy waiting for the next time I can go for a run. A RUN!! Who woulda thunk???!!!

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DACIUS 12/2/2009 10:48AM

    I have a sign above my bike in the garage that says "living healthy is 99% mental". it is one of my daily reminders that the physical part of eating right and exercising correctly is such a small part to succeeding in losing weight. If your mind is right, truely right. I guarantee you will be a healthier person. But that is a big step. My mind is right most of the time. But sometimes my mind is telling me, "you ran 8 miles yesterday you crazy SOB!!! You need to rest today". Even though I know I can easily rock another run or bike ride.

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DEEGEE2 12/2/2009 10:48AM

    Thanks for posting !

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4DOGNIGHT 12/2/2009 10:46AM

    I was going to write my own blog this morning but when I saw your title, decided you had already said what I wanted to say. Weight loss is indeed a mental game/battle. Battle is more like it for me. When I focus in, i can do it, and then I allow myself to go off the deep end, eating whatever is put in front of me. If only I didn't yo yo. It's always when stress butts itself into my life. Something that keeps my mind occupied instead of concentrating on what I'm eating. Something that strips my time away so I can't get to the store to stock up on the right foods. Something like pouring down rain for the last two days that gets in the way of walking outside. It's letting up. Maybe I can get outside this afternoon. Something like convincing myself that I may weigh 188 pounds but I look really good anyway. And my clothes fit. Phooey on that. What a croc. Once again, I have started out the month with my food diary and hope to motivate myself to do it everyday. And if I have the right food in the house, I eat enough so I don't get hungry. Yesterday for lunch, there was absolutely nothing. I ended up with 1 slice of Whole wheat bread with peanut butter and a banana. Then in the afternoon, finished up the vanilla ice cream. DInner was italiam sausage, peppers and onions and 1 slice of bread. Today I WILL go shopping for food. I NEED to go shopping for food. So, focus, planning, eating enough of the right things, exercise are key. Thanks for the Post

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CINCYDORA 12/2/2009 10:46AM

    Thanks. I needed to hear that today.

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LIMELITESHINES 12/2/2009 10:42AM

    I never thought I could. I didn't think I had the strength to do it. :) I still have my issues and my moments . . . but I found out the same way you did. I tried running for 30 seconds. then 45. then 60. And before I knew it, I ran my first 5K (and I ran the whole thing in 33 minutes!) . . . and right then I knew that my life would never ever ever be the same.

Great blog. Keep it up man!

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LWINTER 12/2/2009 10:35AM

You say it well! And the plain truth--takes looking honestly (I said HONESTLY) at our selves, making that grueling evalutation and deciding to change.

All within our power.

I like to tell the women around me "If you can prove to me that a 300-lb bruiser comes every meal time and forces food down your throat, I will say it's not your fault. Until then, it's in YOUR power!"


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Being comfortable in my own skin...ALL of it....

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Monday provided me with a pretty good work out at the gym and I stayed under my calorie range, hydration was the game for the day and over all I am happy with everything that happened for the day where my health is concerned. I mentioned that I was going to do my 15/15/15 routine and I did but I changed it up a bit, I did my 15 mins on the bike, I did my 15 mins on the arc and I did my 15 on the treadmill but instead of walking at various inclines I warmed up at 3.0 mph for 3 mins and then did intervals running for 2 minutes then walking for 2 minutes and I did that for 20 minutes, the intervals near the end were less than 2 minutes each but it was a good work out none the less and something new to me so I was pleased with it.

Last Wednesday when I was at the gym with Wify I tried running on the treadmill for the first time and it wasn't as bad as I thought and is what prompted me to try it yesterday, and I almost chickened out and just walked. Looking for a treadmill that was stuck in a corner or behind a pillar was the plan but as I was walking away from the weight area I thought "why hide in a corner to run?" so I walked to the treadmill front and center of the gym and was right in plain sight, running is still something that I am not fully comfortable with even with a compression shirt on and I did not have it with me, but I did have my hoodie and that sufficed. My original thoughts of all eyes on the fat dude momentarily came back when I began running but quickly faded as Black train Jack blared in my head phones and I slipped into that I really don't give a.... mode.

It is still hard to not be in that frame of mind at times when you once weighed over 500 pounds, its a hard feeling to shake, you know, the one where it feels like everyone in the world is staring at you. Even now at around 330 pounds and physically able to do pretty much anything that I want to I am still a big boy, I am still not what you would call a physically fit individual if you were judging on looks alone and perhaps not even if it was my abilities that were being evaluated but none of that really matters. Doing what I need to do is what I need to do and that's it, letting what someone else thinks stop me would be my loss and that isn't something that I am ready to accept, does that mean that I won't wear my hoodie to hide the jiggle? nuh uh! its hoodie all the way! but I won't hide in a corner to run either. I have all winter to wear my hoodie to the gym when I run and hopefully by the spring I will have lost a significant amount of weight, at least be under 300 pounds which is a goal of mine.

Getting to under 300 pounds has sort of been back burnered for a while because I am as I said doing pretty much anything that I want to and my weight is not limiting me in any way currently, which is probably untrue but coming from where I have it sure does feel like I am unlimited. Talking to Wify a couple nights ago I told her how this weight that I am right now is where I am comfortable, its what is familiar to me so the hard push to lose lose lose! isn't there, I mean I am working out, I am eating right but its almost just slightly above maintenance levels because I give myself a lot of slack with the calories lately, I am able to walk/run/bike further than ever so I am seeing progress there instead of weight numbers. This morning I weighed in at 336.4 pounds which is 8 pounds higher than my lowest weight and where I have been hovering for the last couple weeks since my surgery and now that the cat is out of the bag its time to get back into a downward swing with the weight so a challenge will be set.

I want to hit 300 pounds or below before April 2nd 2010, that number is a very achievable amount of weight as it will mean that need to lose 2 pounds per week on average from this Friday until April 2nd. Because I am the way that I am I want to try to get below that number before then and I am planning on upping the intensity at the gym, I will still do my same two routines but I will up the speed, distance and weight in which I am doing these things and hopefully it will kick the weight loss into high gear, or at least a higher gear than I am in right now. Unlike the last challenge I will not be having a surgery to mess up the final result so Iwill add it to the side bar and add a weigh in each week until April 2nd, I am trying to think of something that I will have to do if I reach the goal, surpass the goal or do not make the goal like maybe donate to JDRF a certain dollar amount per pound under or over or whatever, if any of you fine people have any good ideas please drop it in the comment section.

There you have it, another post, a new challenge and now you owe yourself a big ol glass of H2O so hop on up and get it, you have sat on your butt long enough reading this post. Of course thanks for the support and for following along and tune in tomorrow to find out what happens in the next episode of as the fat guy turns..

As Ever

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JBMT08 12/3/2009 2:12PM

    I LOVE IT!!!!!
As a suggestion for the donations: maybe you can donate your weight lost in food to a local food shelter? I have been toying with that for a while, but, I have been hovering around the same weight for a while...

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DAVEOZ 12/2/2009 10:47AM

    Good for you not chickening out. If you think about it, fear is just an emotion that can be changed in a split second. I am your weight and am determined to run again which I did years ago.

Your determination is discernable and your drive unstoppable. I say, do what you want, screw the fear and who gives a rat butt what people think about your jiggling. Think about it: their opinions mean NOTHING in your life do they?

Peace brother and keep on going! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HAPPYSOUL91 12/2/2009 10:11AM

    Boy, being comfortable in one's own skin is a major accomplishment. emoticon

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DACIUS 12/2/2009 9:32AM

    I totally get where you are at right now. While my #'s are smaller than yours overall. At 70+ pounds lost I am at a point where I am comfortable with my body size and very comfortable with my health.

I find myself questioning whether losing another 40lbs is really necessary. I have noticed my workouts lack some intensity (Intensity is the wrong word...more lack of pushing myself). My eating is still pretty strong, but I will eat a sweet treat once or twice a week (still staying well within my limits).

I can run 10 miles now. I weigh 250lbs.... Most people do not believe that. yeah I still jiggle when I run. but I take pride in the fact that I can outrun some of the skinny people out there. I take pride that I run 20 to 30 miles every week. Not many people can say that. Even fewer that weigh 250lbs can make that claim.

I say shed that hoody my friend. Don't be ashamed of your body. You have worked very hard to get where you are at and there are only a handful of people in the world that are able to run at 330lbs. I could do it...but only for a few minutes at a time. BE PROUD of what you are able to physically do for a man your size. Because most men 300+ lbs get winded walking from their car to the gym door. I know... I used to be that guy. I would literally be sweating before I touched the treadmiil.

As always you are an inspiration to me buddy. you keep up the great work and make sure you keep running in your routine. I still find it to be my strongest, most challenging workout.

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MKERN500 12/2/2009 8:42AM

    Love the 300 image! Definitely a good motivator!

I know what you mean about still feeling 'fat' even after you've become healthier. I've recently started to add to my wardrobe but I keep ordering sizes too big because my mind still believes I'm that other size. Hopefully one day we will realize that we've shed not just weight but our old selves.

Keep up the great job! And keep it movin! emoticon

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CJROMB 12/2/2009 2:22AM

    This was my FAVORITE PART:

Doing what I need to do is what I need to do and that's it, letting what someone else thinks stop me would be my loss and that isn't something that I am ready to accept, does that mean that I won't wear my hoodie to hide the jiggle? nuh uh! its hoodie all the way! but I won't hide in a corner to run either. I have all winter to wear my hoodie to the gym when I run and hopefully by the spring I will have lost a significant amount of weight, at least be under 300 pounds which is a goal of mine.

Your honesty is inspiring!

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CJROMB 12/2/2009 2:14AM

    This was my FAVORITE PART:
Doing what I need to do is what I need to do and that's it, letting what someone else thinks stop me would be my loss and that isn't something that I am ready to accept, does that mean that I won't wear my hoodie to hide the jiggle? nuh uh! its hoodie all the way! but I won't hide in a corner to run either. I have all winter to wear my hoodie to the gym when I run and hopefully by the spring I will have lost a significant amount of weight, at least be under 300 pounds which is a goal of mine.

Your honesty is inspiring!

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SUBVET688 12/2/2009 1:07AM

    Hey, I'm new here on the site. You have done an awesome job and have a great attitude. I appreciate the honesty in the posts I have read and this one is no exception.

I can relate to the feeling of being happy where you are, feeling better than ever and maintaining. Seven and a half years ago I stepped on the scales and was shocked to see 400 pounds. I was feeling horrible, short winded, not sleeping, etc. It took me a little over a year to drop 120 pounds. I was feeling great, I was walking in 5k's, hiking, running around with my son, etc. I hadn't reached my ultimate goal of dropping to 225 lbs, but I was happy with where I was. I started maintaining and doing a great job with it. I wasn't concerned with really losing anymore. My maintenance lasted a good year plus. Then I got busy doing other things and stopped logging my calories and really being diligent. I was good to go as far as I was concerned. Things started slipping a little, I weighed in less and less. Gained some, but convinced myself it was temporary and I would tighten up my discipline, but never got around to it. I gained more but it was so slow and I didn't pay attention to my body. It took a few years, but I gained a bunch back.

Now my 40th birthday roled around and I stepped on the scale and boom 380 stared back at me. Mind you I am still WAY healthier than I was the first time around, but this was a wake up call. It has been slow starting, but I have lost 25 pounds since and am here to really get back in the groove and lose down to my ultimate goal, now 0f 210 (a compromise with my doc).

This is a long reply and I by no means, mean to dis what you have done, or the great attitude that you have. I just want to cation that you do not slip like I did. It sucks big time. Keep on keeping on. We all can do it and we all will do it with a little help from our friends.

Comment edited on: 12/2/2009 1:13:11 AM

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BETHANYBOO 12/1/2009 8:45PM

    It sounds like you are doing great. Congrats!

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LISAMG1220 12/1/2009 8:43PM

    I love the 300 pic! It made me giggle. I like your donation idea. My plan is to donate an item of food for every pound I have lost to Kentucky Harvest. You are going to rock that goal brother!! keep up the good work!! : )

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BILLALEX70 12/1/2009 4:07PM

    Hey brother.
I know you know that I totally relate to you; especially on the giggles. A compression shirt is only half the battle; add some shorts as well. I'd say compression shorts do more for the bottom giggles than the top does. I tried Walmart brand Starter compression gear and found it less than adequate.

I've been on a bit of a plateau as well, but I'm staying the course. Stay true brother.

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ZIRCADIA 12/1/2009 3:19PM

    YAY for running in the gym! Also -- LOVE the 300 image! HAHAHAHA So funny.

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AROCHFORD 12/1/2009 3:18PM

    Thanks good luck on that under 300. I feel the same way about under 200. I stalled at 220 for the same reason. I feel comfortable here. I also ran but on the street in a tight fitted top. I usually wear xlarge mens tshirts. I felt REALLY exposed but I did it anyway. Thanks for sharing a usual you help me so much.

Keep SPArking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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1TOBFIT 12/1/2009 2:10PM

    Wow, I loved reading this! You have done so well for yourself and should be so proud of how far you've come !
Good for you !
I know all too well the feeling of "hiding" under baggy clothing and behind pillars etc. No more of that !
You are taking your health and fitness into your own hands and showing everyone how its done. There's NO shame in that.
Through you, you give others hope !
I cant wait to read your UNDER 300 blog !

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SIMPLE_TAILOR 12/1/2009 1:00PM

    Love that cover.

I need o set a target and go do it. You can't go anywhere until you know where you are going.

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WANDAC2013 12/1/2009 12:28PM

    You're doing an awesome job---keep it up!!!!! emoticon

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CAROLYN1213 12/1/2009 12:25PM

    I hear ya on the running and jiggling! I've never been a small gal and have always kinda stood out in the crowd. Now, I look at it as a good thing. There may be a woman my size, maybe a little larger or a little smaller, that will look at me running, lifting, giving it my all and think to themselves . . . "if she can do it, so can I." or the may be thinking "I will never let myself get that our of shape" either way, they are inspired to look at themselves.

Great goals! Very attainable! Thanks for the post!

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LAURIE5658 12/1/2009 12:10PM

    Baby steps, Botzzz. When you are ready to take on more weight loss, you will know it I am very sure of that. You are amamzing!

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PINKCOCONUT 12/1/2009 11:22AM

    I can TOTALLY relate! I have been in quite a comfort zone lately, I have never been as small as I am now and I've been letting calories slide and it's now starting to get to me. New challenges are a great idea, you'll totally get under 300 by spring!

And as a runner, I STILL feel gross when I run, I feel ALL my rolls just blobbing up and down when I run so no worries! You're not the only one!

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RENA1965 12/1/2009 11:20AM

    keep grinding it emoticon

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PRUPLEBEAR 12/1/2009 11:20AM

    Great goal! I know you are strong and will be able to reach it!

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LIMELITESHINES 12/1/2009 11:11AM

    What a great goal to set! You'll definitely do it if you set your mind to it! You're a strong and determined person. :)

You know . . as far as running infront of others . . I know exactly how you feel. But I heard something a little while ago that really registered with me. Someone said to me "What other people think of you is none of your business."

I thought about that one for a moment . . . and you know what? It's so true! It is none of my business . . and how the heck do I know what they are thinking anyway. Not my business! :) It's really helped me to just get on that treadmill and RUN. and run HARD. And if the treadmill is shaking and making noise . . oh well! As long as it doesn't break (teehee!) it's not my problem!

So rock out that weight loss . . . (I love the picture to go with your challenge . . how perfect! hehe) . . . you'll do great!!!!!!

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Four days was the focus 2 years old

Monday, November 30, 2009

This four day weekend was interesting, I did not go crazy with my intake just because there was a giant bird in the house, no I don't mean Big Bird though I recall watching some of him Friday morning and I did not go over calories too much if at all on Thanksgiving. I have not worked out since Wednesday, meaning it has been four days since I have been to the gym and last night I started feeling it. Sitting in the living room I started feeling anxious and then bored and then I walked into the kitchen with full intentions of raiding the refrigerator but I stopped at the doorway and thought about how I wasn't really hungry and told Wify "I'm goin crazy" she smiled and it dawned on me that I had not worked out in so many days so out of the kitchen I went. I honestly believe that I NEED the exercise at this point or else I get all feeling confined and locked down, this afternoon will afford me the first chance to getto the gym since Wednesday of last week and I feel like its Christmas morning because I can't wait to get there this afternoon.

This Friday I have decided that I will post a weigh in because I feel that good, bad or ugly it helps me to have it out there and up on the blog so I have to get back to doing it. I am still up above my lowest weight but it is still creeping downward so that is all I can hope for, the plan is to hit it hard until I reach that line drawn in the sand which reads sub 300 lbs. I feel healthier than I have been since starting this whole ride and I know that I am, I can do things today that I was not capable of doing even 6 months ago and that is an amazing thing for me and it fuels my drive which is awesome because I want to do things like working out and I am finding that "what can I do to improve my work outs" is whats in my head much of the time.

Today I am planning on getting in my 15/15/15 cardio work out in and following that I will do my shoulders/biceps work out on the weights. What is the 15/15/15 cardio work out you ask? well I am glad you asked, let me splain Lucy, I start off with a 15 minute ride on a stationary bike set at a resistance level of 11 or 12 then its onto the Arc-trainer for 15 minutes set at 45 resistance and finally onto a treadmill for 17 minutes, which is a 2 minute warm up at 3.0 % incline to get my balance right and then 5 minutes at 15% incline, 5 minutes at 10% incline and finally 5 minutes at 5% incline all at 3.0 mph, not bad right? and I feel like I really get a good cardio work out in when I do it this way all while keeping it interesting by not spending too much time on one machine. I am starting fresh this week with the weights and what I mean is that I am not sore one bit and this is the first time since I started lifting more seriously that its the case, partially because of the 4 days off and partially because I am starting to get use to lifting again, or should I say that my muscles are getting use to it.

Another week and hopefully another pound or 4 disappears from the scale, I know that I will be more fit any way that its cut because with every trip to the gym, walk around the lake or bike ride I get stronger, faster and healthier so it is a win win my friends.

Thats all I got on this cloudy Monday so I am off to the gym, until next time remember that you are the one making the choices, not me, not that other fella, it is you, so make the right choices and the rest falls into place on its own.

As Ever

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARIBAL 12/1/2009 10:11AM

    I havent been in gym for 2 weeks... emoticon

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SNEAKYGREG 12/1/2009 8:23AM

    Funny how we get to wanting different things but when we get bored the food becomes our number one focus. I have caught myself in that bored I gonna eat everything I see mode, kinda scary

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DIFROMWYOMING 11/30/2009 11:51PM

    And Drink your Water! emoticon
I finally made it back to the gym this morning after a week of missing it, and boy was it sweet!

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LISAMG1220 11/30/2009 7:05PM

    The past 2 weeks I have not had time to log my food properly and it has become a big issue. so I started keeping a written journal and will start logging my food again tonight. Time is going to be a big problem the next month, but I will do everything I can to sqeeze in extra time somewhere! Hope you had fun at the gym! Now it is my turn to go!! Have a great week!!!!!

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TRACYZABELLE 11/30/2009 5:49PM

    As hard as it is going to be I am eliminating sugar and cutting carbs this next month and I will kick up the exercise. I wanted to hit 450 by the new year... lets see what happens

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SIMPLE_TAILOR 11/30/2009 2:23PM

    I need to get to this point. Maybe a little "pooh" dancing will get me in the right frame of mind.

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DAVEOZ 11/30/2009 12:27PM

    Good job on staying in check. Keep it up!


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PLUSTODOWNSIZE 11/30/2009 12:02PM

    Have fun at the gym!

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DACIUS 11/30/2009 12:01PM

    Sounds like a good routine with the Cardio.

The holiday was a tough one. Especially since the schedule gets kicked all out of whack. As crazy as it sounds...I need to work so that my schedule is cut and alloted for.

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LAURIE5658 11/30/2009 11:52AM

    Botzzz, I did not hit the fitness trail like I ususally do either. BUT I just had to get out and blow off steam so some runs were in order. I was a MUCH better girl after that! What a huge difference releasing endorphns will do!!

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ENCHANTEDMAMA 11/30/2009 11:49AM

    I know that feeling! When I haven't exercised in days, I feel like I'm depriving myself, and I do feel caged in. I'm glad I'm not the only one. Hubby definitely does not understand that feeling. Not yet, at least. :-P

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HAPPYSOUL91 11/30/2009 11:42AM

    Good job on catching yourself before the binge.

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Ask yourself....

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Why am I fat?

Why can't I stop eating?

Am I going to die today?

When will I admit that I have a problem?

Who will take care of my children when I am gone?

What am I missing out on because of my weight problem?

Does this food taste good enough for me to allow it to control me?

How long will it be before I need assistance getting myself dressed?

How am I going to get up from this couch if I keep going in this direction?

How much longer can my body last at this weight before a serious injury occurs?

How many firemen will it take to carry me from my home after my heart attack?

Do I want to live the rest of my life wishing that I would do something about my health?

Do I want to put my loved ones through taking care of me because I won't do something about my bad eating and exercising habits?

When you are done answering those questions honestly, make a decision, Make the decision to do something about the weight that is holding you back and quite literally shortening your rime on the planet. I know it is not easy, I know that it takes time and I know these things from personal experience and though I do not like wishing simply because if you $hit into one hand and wish into the other we all know which one fills up first but I really do wish that I had decided to do something about my health earlier on. It took me to get to the point where I thought about if I was going to have a heart attack on a daily basis before I did what needed to be done and finally decided that I had to do something before it was too late, if you are reading this and are in that place, or even if you are not quite there yet but do know that you are on the way, do not fool yourself into thinking that its not a life or death situation because it is and starting tomorrow will not cut it.

It is easy for me to see it so clear now that I am down more than 200 pounds but back when I was heavier there was nothing anyone could have said to me that would have made a difference in the way that I felt about it at the time, just ask my wife if you don't believe me because Lord knows that she tried to get me to see it. In the spirit of Thanksgiving I want to thank my wife publicly on my blog for being there through everything that we have been through in the past 8 years and though I know not all of it was because of my weight much of it was and for that I am thankful that I am married to the most wonderful woman that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting.

I hope everyone has an awesome Turkey day.

As Ever

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEDDYBEARGIRL 11/29/2009 5:00PM

    Thanks for such a heartfelt honest blog posing questions that I myself have been asking myself for a very long time. I even have answers for some of them already and that is not necessarily a good thing if I have not been able to put much action into changing those answers.

I have over 200 pounds I need to lose and I have tasted weight loss(losing 100 of those pounds) and I am ashamed to say that for personal emotional demons from my past that still haunt me, I chose to put the weight back on and I 100% regret ever making that choice.

What I want to say to all out there that have such a large amount of weight to lose is that even after loosing those 100 pounds and physically I was half way there and physically more able to live and enjoy life internally emotionally I was still 100 pounds heavier than what the scale said. Emotionally I did not change and that was my downfall.

I am still working on changing what I need to do emotionally to be able to handle emotionally living in a thin body again. If you have lived for so long using the body fat as a wall of protection that actually ended up becoming a self imposed prison cell it is a very scary thing to begin to allow those fat layered wall to fall and become vulnerable all over again. That is where I am at personally. I am working on losing that fear of being vulnerable by releasing my walls of fat that I held onto for security.

Bless you for your inspirational blogs that keep me thinking and keep me in check with myself!

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CRAFTYPATCH 11/27/2009 8:38PM

    My husband and I have a photo of us pre-healthy living...above it my husband wrote the words "Why are you fat?" We put it on the refrigerator door as a reminder every time we reach for food. It caught my eye when those were the first words of this post.

I really feel like I am on track. I not only want to be slim and healthy but I want to do the things that get me there. Your blog is such an inspiration every day. Thank you for sharing your feelings, triumphs and life. It is very much appreciated!

emoticon emoticon

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TRACYZABELLE 11/27/2009 4:11AM

    Believe me I ask myself these questions all the time... scary stuff..
I hope you and the wifey had a great Thanksgiving.

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ETHEL_MERMAID 11/26/2009 1:26PM

    I wish you and your wonderful wife a very happy and memorable Thanksgiving today...and speaking of thanks, I'm very grateful to have come across this post of yours. The number on the scale doesn't matter: If we've asked ourselves enough of these questions to feel some pretty profound discomfort, it's time to make that decision, isn't it? Wow...can I ever relate! Where our health is concerned, "mañana" is a lousy strategy! All the best to you, Susan

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SNEAKYGREG 11/26/2009 11:26AM

    Isn't it wonderful to truly have a spouse that took the for better or worse vows seriously.

Great blog and if that doesn't make people think, nothing will

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LALAFLOWERS 11/26/2009 8:02AM

    WOW... questions that so many need to ask themselves... Thanks for posting them.. And my kudos to you for asking them of yourself, and deciding to make a change in your life! (and that of your wife, family, friends.. and all those watching on the sidelines that you don't know yet)

Have a great Thanksgiving!

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AKELAZ 11/26/2009 7:00AM

    Brave questions that no-one generally asks - out loud - and that no one needs to respond to because no one wants to voice the answers. Good for you for making us think - as always. Good for you for achieving a 200lb weightloss. Good for your wife for her perseverance and encouragement. Hope you all have a great Thanksgiving

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DDOORN 11/26/2009 1:10AM

    Terrific questions...going to hang onto them for future reference and to pass along to others...! I think those of us who have gone on to lose the weight have asked ourselves most of these, but don't actually remember doing so...! :-)


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LISAMG1220 11/25/2009 11:42PM

    Great blog! You are such a sweetie for what you said about your Wifey. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your fam! : )

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BILLALEX70 11/25/2009 9:30PM

    Gobble, gobble brother!

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VEMAN1 11/25/2009 8:52PM

    Amen brother!

The thoughts still haunt me.

If not now, when? If not for me, then who? If only, not today. I choose to not let myself be a victim of my own self destruction. I am glad to see that I am in such good company!

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ALEXSGIRL1 11/25/2009 7:17PM

    i only wish my husband asked himself these questions before it is to late. you have a great family and a great second chance at life . it is great that you are not wasting your life but making the most of it. you your wife and those kids of yours have a lot of living left to do. i am thankful you are here to enjoy the journey with.

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RUSSELLORAMA 11/25/2009 6:27PM

    Those are important questions that no one wants to ask and many people avoid answering! Thanks so much for sharing this blog. Sometimes you just have to start making changes for yourself and hope that your friends and family come along with you.

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DARLENEK04 11/25/2009 5:28PM





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YOOVIE 11/25/2009 5:14PM

    another real eye-opener. sometimes i wish you lived closer. i need to talk to my roommate about his weight but I am terrified to hurt his feelings because he is older and kind and gentle. but there are exactly the questions he needs to hear. I think he is up to about 4 or 5 firemen. I'm getting more worried what with the snow coming soon, he falls badly every winter.

Anyway- on a lighter note! HAVE A WONDERFUL WONDERFUL HOLIDAY!!!!!!!

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KNH771 11/25/2009 4:51PM

    Have a blessed and safe turkey day yourself! Thanks for the questions. A couple of them really hit home. Your right about how you look at the world differently when you're at your peak weight. Looking back after you've lost the some of the weight, you see things much more clearly.

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LAURIE5658 11/25/2009 4:25PM

    Botzzz, I wish for you the healthiest and happiest Thanksgiving EVER!!! You deserve it, my friend!!!

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KSIGMA1222 11/25/2009 3:41PM

    I remember when I used to say:
"I am on the dont care eat everything diet."
"Working out is to much work, I'm much happier just sitting here watching tv(And the world go by!)"
"Yeah, you go run your run or race I will sit right here and cheer you on."
"I can eat a whole bag of Oreos! Or a pizza! Or a bucket of Chicken! or all three at once! Isn't it cool!"
"I dont want to get all sweaty."
"Doesn't everyone drink 2 gallons of soda a day?"
"So what if I get winded walking up the stairs."
"I need to........"
I want to........"
"Tomorrow I will........."
"This really doesn't taste good but I dont want to waste it."
"I will start once this is over now when that is done, ok now when I reach this point and the circumstances are all lined up and my excuses run out."
"So what everyone already sees me as a fat ogre, so why should I care?"
"Dont take my picture or Let me take the picture of the group I will get in the next one."
"My clothing is just shrinking."
"I am not worth anything anyway so why should I care?"
"My children will understand and love me anyway(And they do love me but how long will i be around for this love?)"
"I will live long enough to see my children graduate college?"
"My kids will not learn my bad habits! I will just tell them not to do as I do."

Amazing what I can come up with off the top of my head when it comes to all of this and reading your questions, like it was yesterday.

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SIMPLE_TAILOR 11/25/2009 3:34PM

    Then you haven't met my wife. I definitely don't deserve her.

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DAVEOZ 11/25/2009 3:05PM

    I have confided in my wife about tomorrow's questionable experience.

She said that there WILL be no problem because I will be there.

OK, she's the boss!

Man, I love that woman. emoticon

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DACIUS 11/25/2009 2:56PM

    You and I are some blessed guys. They say behind every good man is a strong woman. I can safely say for sure that my decisions I make every day have her in the back of my mind, making me push that extra mile or lift that extra rep.

You are also absolutely right about how no one can make someone answer those questions. Those are questions someone has to ask themselves when they are ready for it. No one can make you want to lose weight. You have to want it deep within your self. You have to have that inner fire.

Great blog. Happy thanksgiving bud. Enjoy your family because WE both have an amazing amount of things to be Thankful for.

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TROPHYWIFE2B 11/25/2009 2:46PM

    You're welcome babe, Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!

Comment edited on: 11/25/2009 2:48:15 PM

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