Monday, February 02, 2009
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now back to our regularly scheduled programming...
This weekend was a busy one as you might be able to tell from my lack of posts, we decided that it was time to paint my daughters bedroom and what we ended up with is as my wife says "a catalog look" I took some before pictures but I haven't taken any afters yet because we ordered a border to put on the walls and when it gets here look for some pics. Ok ok enough about the three year olds room how did your food go this weekend you ask? welp lets say I was not really "on track" it all started Friday, I was at my mother in laws place and she offered me a beer and I agreed and went over calories exactly one beer so Friday was not really too bad. Then there was Saturday which started off well enough with a bowl of Honey combs cereal (which by the way if you don't know is a low calorie very tasty cereal!) but then I was given a bowl of home made beef stew and didn't know how many calories was in it so I figured it high but then the day kind of just went the way of not counting the calories. I don't think I went too far above on Saturday but I was definitely higher than 1700 which ended with a big bowl of popcorn that went perfectly with the movie we watched. Sunday was a different story completely, again breakfast started off ok but as the day progressed I noticed that I wasn't counting the calories that I was eating past mentally noting what had gone down the chute. Dinner was a noodle soup that I made which also started off well enough, I measured my 2 cup portion but was not satisfied with it and had another cup and remember I haven't written down any calories for the day yet! I KNOW that I was way above Sunday where my intake is concerned. We are back on track this morning and I am writing the intake down again, sometimes I have a weekend or a day like that where I just pretty much eat ok (usually a bit higher) but don't count the calories exactly.
I mentioned that we painted my daughters room and I have to mention that I am sore from it! I do not think that the soreness is from when we painted the walls, I used a roller for that but I did paint sort of a mural on her door which took about 45 minutes to paint and another 15 to sketch onto the panels and this is something that I underestimated the power of. My calf is sore from tippy toeing to get the right angle, my core knows that it has done something from all of the holding steady in a position to get straight lines onto the door panels and I am just feeling it in general in spots that normally go under the radar which makes me think. I have a funny feeling that some yoga may be in my future because its what I can equate to how my body feels, like if I were to do yoga, of course I have never really "done" yoga so I am just assuming this is how it would feel.
Over all not a great weekend food wise but not the worse in the world either, but then again this is a lifestyle change and not a diet so in that I am not limited in what or how I can eat. I am still on track to hit that goal of being 300 pounds by the end of June and with the start of February I am a month closer to warmer weather and some hiking, Wify is going to join me this year in my hikes and we bought some "gear" over the winter months so that we can enjoy our hikes a bit more. Living out in the boonies will afford us the pleasure of plenty places to hike (I think) and there is a large wooded area right behind our home now that can be used for the purpose of short hikes with the kiddos, you know conditioning them for longer ones! and with that ends the Monday edition of this old couch, thank you for reading and don't forget that H2O that you just earned for making it through another post!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Friday just jumped up on me, I had not even realized that today was weigh in day until I woke up and Wify asked how much did I think I lost this week, so onto the scale I went. No building up today its plain and simply a 2 pound loss, the scale said 354 pounds and that means I am down 180 pounds since starting this path to better health. Fifteen pounds in the month of January is not a bad start to the year, when I started 2009 I would have had to lose an average of 2.8 pounds per week to reach my goal of being under 300 pounds by the end of June but with the 15 pounds that I lost in Jan that average just dropped to 2.5 pounds per week until June to hit that mark, it appears that I am ahead of the original schedule! 20 pounds until I have lost a double century, 54 pounds to reach my June goal and 79 pounds left to hit that magical number that I set when I started this whole thing, seventy nine pounds until I am at my goal weight sounds like a large number, it sounds like an impossibility to say "I have 79 pounds to lose" or it did anyways before I dropped 180 now its just the home stretch. With that 2 pounds this week I have lost a total of 33.70% of my total body weight to date, I set a goal of weighing 275 pounds but I am officially changing that goal to weigh 267 pounds, heres why. If I go for 267 pounds it is only 8 pounds more than my current goal and if I can hit 267 pounds I will have lost 50% of my total body weight and there is something about being able to say that I have lost 50% of my highest weight that appeals to me. Now when all is said and done I suspect that I will actually strive to get even lower than that figure but I think that is a good solid number to shoot for.
This Suzuki GSXR 600 weighs in at 354 pounds just like me.
I have lost more than 1/3 of my total body weight in the past year, that number will be 1/2 by the end of this year or sooner, ideally I would like to be under 300 pounds by the end of June which will give me 6 months to lose that last 25, actually 32 now pounds with the new target weight of 267 lbs which I believe will be a nice obtainable number to reach, When I hit that 300 by June I will need to lose just over a pound per week for the rest of the year to hit my 267 pound goal. Honestly the mere fact that I can say I have lost 180 pounds and that the possibility of me weighing 267 pounds is just around the corner in the grand scheme is amazing to me and something that I have thought a lot about in recent years. Imagine this, a fat kid that has known nothing but being "the fat kid" is now coming pretty damned close to being a weight that will be considered pretty healthy for the first time in his life, for the very first time that fat kid will know how it feels to be able to walk around and not feel as if his gravitational pull demands that every eye in the room be drawn to him merely for the rotundness of his body. My best friend once told me as we talked about being fat (He had lost a bunch of weight at the time, we were about 20 years old) that "being too skinny will always be better than being too fat" and I honestly at the time thought "no way man, I would rather be the way I am than to be skin and bones" I honestly believed that back then and I think its because it was all that I knew, so like that poor kid that lives in an old worn down house where the income is feeble at best doesn't know that his family is "poor" because its what he knows I think I was that fat guy that was living life and doing what I wanted to and could not see the logic in the statement. I have to say that I can agree with his statement that was made so many years ago if not completely I have to admit that being "too fat" Sucks ass, so I think I will see what being skinny feels like for a while.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Carrying yourself around at 534 pounds is not easy, walking up a flight of stairs may as well have been going for a run because by the time I reached the 13th stair bliss was how it felt that there was not 14 stairs and my heart was racing, beating very hard all while pride was held in by trying to breath slowly so that my wife would not pick up on the fact that my chest felt like it was going to explode. Sliding into a car and having my belly touch the steering wheel in a full sized car sucking it in when first entering to not let anyone see that it was happening was the norm only letting it out after pulling away because no one would notice while the car was moving right? Life was not fun nor easy at 534 pounds, it was not what one would call peachy. Many nights I would wake up and have heartburn so bad that I could do nothing but get up and eat a couple slices of bread, drink a glass of milk followed by a handful of Tums, Constantly fidgeting because sitting too long in one position started making things ache or in some cases just plain old hurt. I literally had days where my chest felt like it had been pressurized just from minimal movement and have had the thought "Is my heart going to give out today?" and that folks is not a happy happy joy joy moment and if I am being honest it was scary and is what ultimately made me decide to do this weight loss gig.
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. making promises to myself and my children and my wife to eat healthy to make sure that I will be around to show my son how to drive a car, walk my daughter down the aisle one day, to hold my Wifes hand while we take a stroll at 70 years old all of these things were but questions not so long ago, will I be here to teach my son to drive? will I be here to walk my beautiful daughter down the aisle one day? will my wife have my hand to hold in her golden years? now that answer is leaning towards the yes column because I am taking control of my health and dropping the unwanted weight that has attached itself to my body over the past few years of neglecting it. Movie theater seats are no longer my nemesis, I have conquered the booth and can honestly say that I have enriched my life as well as my families. I took my weight problem and "This is Sparta" kicked it into oblivion along with many of my fears that I had before making this decision.
I make my own decisions now where health is concerned, food addiction? whats that? while I was writing this a song comes to mind because of the lyrics, Pearl Jam "Elderly woman behind the counter in a small town"
I seem to recognize your face
haunting familiar yet I can't seem to place it
cannot find the candle of thought to light your name
lifetimes are catching up with me
all these changes taking place
I wish I'd seen the place
but no ones ever taken me.
hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away
I swear I recognize your breath
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising
of course you can't see me for I'm not my former
its hard when your stuck upon a shelf
I changed by not changing at all
small town predicts my fate
perhaps thats what no one wants to see
I just want to scream hello
my god its been so long never dreamed you'd return
but now here you are and here I am
hearts and thoughts they fade away.
Apparently so does fat! Now of course that song is not about a fat guy that has lost an entire persons worth of weight but surely you can see where there are parallels that could be applied to how I feel about what I have gone through in the past year. I Know that in my excitement I posted that picture above in a post late last night but I honestly felt that it should be posted again so there it is! a quote from my brother "I cannot ever remember you looking that way, you look like a different person" My cousin said that "You should stop losing weight now so that I can recognize you again" and I am smaller than when I met my wife so she is also seeing me this way for the first time in her life, and it made my mother cry, all of that feels better than you can possibly know if you have not lost a substantial amount of weight. I mean C'mon these are all people that have grown up living with me, next door to me or are married to me, I would be lying if I said it didn't feel good, it was a lot of hard work that was worth every minute and more.
If you are over weight and feel like it is impossible to drop the extra baggage, if you feel like I use to, like there is nothing that you can do to help make yourself a more healthy and happy person please know that you can and there IS a way to do it, the first couple of steps can be hard, and there will be times that you feel like its just not worth the effort but trust me, I was in that position just 394 days ago and it feels much better to be on this side of the fence. I have heard the saying "nothing tastes as good as thin feels" and as a 534 pound guy I always despised that statement and thought "now how can thin feel better than an extra large double bacon pizza? C'mon now" but I always knew that there was some truth to it and I have to admit though I am not "thin" by any stretch of the imagination that "thinner" DOES in fact feel better than any double bacon pizza that I have ever had in my life time and I can't say it any plainer than that.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
I took a couple pictures of myself tonight and just had to share, when I started this weight loss thang I initially said to myself that I wanted to drop 100 pounds and had no clue how that would look on me because I didn't even know exactly what I weighed on day one. Here I am 178 plus pounds lighter than just over a year ago and I am honestly humbled by what I have accomplished, I never thought that I would be 178 pounds lighter in the time frame that I have done this in. I still look in the mirror and see that other guy that was lumbering along struggling to make it up the 4 stairs that was on his front porch all while carrying a sack of cheese burgers from McNasty or an extra large double bacon pizza (yeah I have actually ordered an extra large double bacon pizza!) but tonight I decided I would take a picture or two to photoshop into a compare shot and I actually just sat here and stared at it for a minute or 3 when I was done. You see these "before and after" pictures and sometimes ya gotta wonder if they are real and then you see some and they are just insanely awesome in the differences and when I saw the photo below I Know that I have made HUGE changes in myself and I think it looks significantly different enough that if it wasn't me I might doubt it was real!
That first picture was taken on Dec 29th 2007 and I can remember the day like it was yesterday, it had snowed and we brought the kids out to play in our back yard and I am actually holding my daughter in this picture but I cropped her out, but I can remember thinking "take the picture take the picture take the picture" as my wife was shooting it because my back was starting to tighten up. I was in a frame of mind at that point which said that if I was to lose this weight a surgery would be how it happened and it was literally 2 days before I started this blog and my new lifestyle. That second picture was taken tonight, Jan 28th 2009 just 393 days later and I honestly don't recognize that guy from Dec any more, and he is not allowed back here so I don't think I will be reacquainting myself with him any time soon.
That ends this late edition of as the fat guy turns, I just HAD to share this photo with you all, thanks for reading along and if this picture doesn't prove that it can be done on willpower and drive alone I don't know what can.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Last night I was watching The biggest loser and having a conversation with my wife about our weight loss to date and how she was out of green tea and that I needed to make her more for the am, so I will use her to make a point. She said to me that since she started back on a more strict intake level and started the green tea that she feels more hungry during the day for the past couple of days and then she said "I ate a whole pack of bubble gum today between breakfast and coming home from work" I laughed and told her that it was going into the post for today! I think its the perfect example of empty calories and is probably why a large part of the people that try to lose weight have issues doing so. She also mentioned that she has been eating animal crackers at work, animal crackers? so now we are getting to the root of the problem here, bubble gum and animal crackers does not a good meal plan make, so She has decided to make pre-portioned baggies of popcorn to bring to work so that when that urge to munch comes up she has something to grab instead of bubble gum or animal crackers, this is something that She and I did when we first began our weight loss. That brings me to the next point, the hunger that she and many others that eat like that have as a result, eating animal crackers and bubble gum or things like that pile on the calories and then when dinner time or lunch time comes around calories are limited and tiny portions are eaten because the calories were already wasted on the sugary snacks earlier in the day. The sugary snacks have another side effect, they boost you up higher than you actually are for a short time and then you crash and burn when the sugar rush goes away.
Indeed Jillian is a tad hot, dare I say I have a crush?!
Last night I tried something a little bit different for dinner, I used ground turkey and made sloppy joes with 80 calorie hamburger buns from Stop & Shop, my daughter has been picky with dinners lately and says that she doesn't eat chicken any more (which means chicken and turkey), She is age 3 and is saying things like that! I am doomed when she becomes a teenager! so with a little bit of daddy trickery ground turkey got turned into a meal that she had no clue what it was and she ate her entire sandwich! I learned that this is a good low calorie alternative to Turkey burgers an already low calorie meal, and I have not had sloppy joes in quite some time, each sandwich had about (and I say about because I estimated the calories of the tomato paste) 205 calories, broken down like this. 2 eighty calorie hamburger buns 160 calories, 5.5 oz ground turkey (which included the tomato paste so it was actually less than 5.5oz of meat but I counted it as 5.5 whole oz of turkey) 220 calories, The tomato paste said 30 calories per serving and there were approximately 5 servings in the small can, I guessed one serving in my 5.5 oz of meat so 30 more calories there for a total of about 205 calories per sandwich, now that ain't bad at all! I think this will be added to my meals again and I think it shows that with a little bit of thinking things out people can eat things that may seem bad for them and not have the negative side effect of gaining weight. The fact that we use less also means that there was left over mix and will be lunch fr me today so money will be saved as well and in todays economy thats always a plus.
My intake for Tuesday ended up at 1630 calories and I did get a 25 minute ride on my stationary bike into the day and I think thats a good day where my weight loss goes. I always seem to do good on Tuesdays and I don't know if its because Monday is gone and I am looking at my program closer, or if its because its The biggest loser night but I always wake up Wednesday morning feeling good about the menu and movement that was done. Maybe its the way Jillian screams at the people on that show to get them moving that gets me, I do know that when I start going to a Gym to do weight training (when I am closer to 300 pounds) if I decide to try out a trainer or something I hope that I find someone like Jillian from TBL because I already push myself so whoever does the pushing in my direction HAS to be aggressive, I am too stubborn to quit or not try to prove someone wrong when they say "you can't do that". All in all I feel as if I am on track and doing well with my new healthy ways, My endurance is up to levels that I cannot even remember having and I feel like I have tons of energy most of the time. I hope to start walking again soon but the snow has to stop before I can really do that, yes it is snowing again here in beautiful New England and it is suppose to turn to freezing rain later then into and I quote the man in the plastic box "the ice will be as thick and hard as concrete" so it is my bike until the snow stops.
The end has come to another post and I am that much stronger mentally and stronger physically because of the movement that I put in yesterday. Thank you for reading along and don't forget to get on up and grab that glass of H2O that ya deserve.
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