Monday, October 18, 2010
The weekend has come and gone, there were ups there were downs but we made it unscathed for the most part. Nothing in the way of exercise was experienced but busy was the flavor of the day on both days so with that a new week begins. Saturday I had the opportunity to head on over to a health and wellness fair in Hartford CT we got to check things out, from a local EMT bicycle patrols whips and gear to a past biggest loser contestant. I met Bill Germanakos from season 4 of the biggest loser back in October of 2008 at this same health fair and this time around I had a chance to meet Rudy Pauls from season 8 of TBL. Nichole Brewer from season 7 was there too but I didn't get the chance to meet her as she was not quite at the booth when I went through , she is in the background of a photo that wify took of me talking with Rudy so I just missed her and hadn't noticed that she was setting up until I got home and looked at my pictures.
Me and Rudy Pauls from The biggest loser season 8 in Hartford October 16th 2010.
I Talked with Rudy for a few minutes and as we were chatting I said to him "I've lost more than 200 pounds so far" to which he responded "I can see it in your face" then said "I mean you can see it everywhere but I mean...yeah you can see it" and then went into talking about the loose skin that he has to deal with and how it bothers him. This told me that yes indeed I have "that look" of someone that has lost a lot of weight, you know the look right? the one where from the chest up I look perfectly normal almost like a fella with a little more on his bones than he should have but over all looks healthy and then the skin is an obvious flag hanging from those same bones stating loudly that the Sharpei is all up in the house. I am not all hung up on the fact that the skin is there because the alternative is much worse, you know, that other life where I weigh 500 plus pounds, yeah that one so the fact that its there though it bugs me I am happy that its not what it was 3 years ago.
Rudy was pretty nice and I have found of all three of the contestants that I have met from the biggest loser all share that, every one of them was more than willing to chat and talk about what was successful for them and offer advice. I met Neil Tejwani who was also on season 4 not at a fair or event but in an every day place which I will not disclose exactly where that was but I have had more than a few conversations with him over the past year. When you share something like dropping 200 pounds with somebody they know just as much as you do just how hard it is to live at the higher weights and I find that most people are more than willing to share their experiences with others who may be struggling or need help. My daughter wanted to get a picture with Rudy "Dada, I want to take a picture with the exercise show guy" but changed her mind when it came time for the shot "Nah, I don't wanna" at the last minute.
Sunday we pretty much gutted a room in my house that was being used for storage because we want to use it for a rec room kind of thing and because of the gutting I was in the house almost all day. I did go over calories on Sunday by a slice of that home made apple pie that I made and possibly a small pile of trail mix and I didn't drink as much as I normally do either, about a gallon and a quart but that's ok, hopefully the week brings me a loss come Friday. Today I have an opportunity to go to the gym with Wify as she has some appointments to take care of and took the day off of work so that should be fun and we will see if she pushes me or I push her.
My day is beginning so the post has to end, I will this week push myself at the gym, count every calorie that goes into my body and enjoy every minute of it, won't you join me?
Friday, October 15, 2010
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Is it Friday already? that of course means that its time to post up the scales number for the week which is a little off this time around but it is what it is. I will get right to it and say that the display flashed me with a 330.0 this morning, I am happy with that number because it reflects a loss and that's where I am going with my motivation. What do you mean when you say "which is a little off this time around" man? how can it be off? that's talking like a fat person! Let me splain, Yesterday morning I weighed 328.6 pounds but weight lifting day fell on Thursday this week and instead of playing games and skipping it or doing it today I thought about what was more important a low number for the weigh in day? or making sure I trained the way that I need to and well the training won that battle. My back, shoulders and triceps are feeling somewhat fatigued as I type this and I am sure that I am retaining more fluid because of it, now don't read into that as some kind of excuse because its not, I knew that my weight would be higher than yesterday and honestly I thought that I would show no loss so I am very happy with the 330.0.
My 5.5 pound orchard fresh apple pie.
We have many choices to make throughout our days, all of us do, even the skinny people of the world and when we make good decisions most of the time things go our way. This week I got out there and did what needed to be done almost every day by either getting to the gym or taking a bike ride, for my efforts I am a pound lighter than last Friday. The weekend has some things in store for me that could end up being pretty fun and possibly motivational so I am actually looking forward to that and I will do my best to get to the gym at least one of those days, perhaps a Sunday bike ride down a path or trail.
Last night I did something that could threaten to derail me on some level, I made a five and a half pound apple pie from the apples that we picked at the orchard. I make this pie every year after our trip and I won't stop making it because I am eating better, my kids love it, wify loves it and it gets my daughter all kinds of excited when she helps me make it. I will have a slice, perhaps two but I will count it into my calories for whenever I have it and I do use splenda in place of sugar and smart balance in place of butter so it is a lighter version even if it isn't exactly light.
We have a one pound loss for the week and I am looking for a better number next week, I am down 4.4 total pounds since my run at 275 restarted and that's right on track so I ain't gonna sweat a smaller loss this week. Continuing down the road that will ultimately lead me to having the thinner body to go with the healthier me that I have worked so hard to get is what I will focus on daily until I get where I need to be. We can all achieve our goals as long as we keep on keepin' on and do what we must, the alternative is to not do anything and keep on wishing that things would be different, the thing about wishing is that if you $hit into one hand and wish into the other the hand with the $hit always seems to fill up first.
Do what you need to do and the rest will fall into place, this is how I choose to live my life.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Yesterday I had the chance to go out on a ride so that's what I did, I took the regular trail that I ride that is about a 15 mile round trip but at every trail head where it crossed a street I explored a bit up and down the roads. The bike computer said that I did 19.5 miles so a new long distance for me was made but my ass paid for it because man was it begging me to get off of the bike by the end of the ride. I need to figure out my what to eat needs if I am to keep going on longer rides because I started feeling low on energy around an hour into the hour and 28 minute ride, the last time I took a longer ride which was 18 miles and an hour twenty minutes I ate a Zone bar about halfway through the ride and I didn't feel anything negative the entire ride. I figured that I had the camera with me and was taking a break at the end of the trail before taking on the hill to my house and decided to make another video to post so here it is.
Video can be seen at zeusmeatball.blogspot.com/2010/10/su
Today will be a gym day because I like to alternate between the longer rides and the gym, plus I want to lift weights so I won't be on the bike today unless you count the stationary at the gym. The plan is simple, 25 minutes on the stationary bike followed by 45 to 60 minutes worth of weight lifting and a cool down either on the treadmill or a spin bike depending on whether there is a class going on when I am there. My weekend sort of steered me off course a bit because of some not so good decisions and lack of working out but I am still looking to pull off a loss come tomorrow mornings weigh in.
Tomorrow I weigh in, keeping focused is going to be my main concern in the coming weeks, I need to get down below 300 pounds and I need to get to that 275 pound goal and I would like it to be sooner than later. With a lot of face time at the gym and on the trails I will get there, I will need to keep my intake where it needs to be and I will have to remain diligent and complete the task at hand, I will do those things and I will do them decisively. There will be weeks that I lose more, there will be weeks that I lose less, then there will be those weeks that nothing will be able to get in my way as I excel into the physical me that I am aiming for, I am taking matters into my own hands and when that happens nothing is stronger than that.
My time, your pain, I reign on you....
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Choices are what we make of them and every day of each and every week we will be faced with decisions on whether to workout or stay home, eat this or not eat that and each and every one of those choices are ours to make, we own every last one of them. Deciding to do what we need to is not always the easiest or most convenient of things, we have to miss out on a slice of birthday cake or pass on a beer with a buddy sometimes and these little things though not so important in the grand scheme are in fact things that we enjoy but making the good choice to enjoy them in moderation is key. The alternative is missing out on almost everything that life has to offer, of course I am talking about when a person weighs north of 500 pounds like I did not so long ago but I am sure that it applies to lighter people as well. The things that I am capable of at this very moment in life are more opposite than day and night and making good choices is how I changed where I was in life with my health.
Going to the gym at night is sort of odd for me because I love going at that time because I feel like I get in an awesome workout yet it means that my sleep will suffer because I am all kinds of pumped up and getting to sleep is impossible. Last night I was faced with a decision to go to the gym and have my sleep be less than optimal or stay home and miss out on working out for the day so off I went about 8:30 last night to get a workout into my day. I thought about how the biggest loser was on and I usually watch it and going to the gym I would miss it as it was a weight lifting day and I could either watch fat people work out or be a fat person working out so off I went. After 25 minutes on the stationary bike I headed over for some weight lifting which lasted about 50 minutes then back over to the treadmill for 25 minutes at a brisk pace on a decently steep incline. I must be neglecting my walking/running because my feet started hurting in the places where they hurt when I don't run for a while and the inside of one of my toes feels rubbed this morning, I suppose that means I need to do some more sprints at the gym in the coming weeks.
Two days from now I will weigh in again for the blog, I need to drop 2 pounds to stay on track with my goal of weighing 275 or less by April 1st and I am planning on doing everything in my power to get there. The food gods are not on my side though if I am being honest, I mentioned our annual trip to the orchard and some 30 pounds of apples that we have and its that time of year for me to make my 9 pound apple pie. Now I don't know if the pie actually weighs 9 pounds but its damn close and I have to make it as I have been making it for years and my family enjoys it. I have in the last couple years changed the recipe a tad bit by using Splenda in place of the sugar that's in it but it is still a hefty slice of yumminess, decisions decisions.
I am at some point today going to be riding down a bike trail somewhere because the days of doing so are numbered with winter on its way and these rides really are therapeutic for me. I found a section of a trail that I want to try out but its a bit of a ride to get to the trail head so perhaps next week as a planned ride leaving early or perhaps a weekend ride. A weekend slip will not derail me, nothing will derail me because I have something to finish and that's going to be the plan until I get to that 275 pound goal. Making goals is kind of silly yet they do so much for us as we tread forward with our healthy living plans, When I began I could not walk 1/3 of a mile comfortably and riding a bicycle was not an option. My goal was to be able to actually live and I am doing that so in that respect I have accomplished what I set out to do which is to not feel caged in my own body but now its tome to get into a place with my health that I will have surpassed just living comfortably and excel in a way that I am above average with my physical self.
Wow fat man! you are going for above average physically? indeed I am my good people and I will do it right in front of your eyes so that you can see that it is possible to do so without any fancy pay as you go diet plans or surgeries or or or... With that said its time to end this post because I need to start getting ready for a bike ride this afternoon and I have some chores around the house to get taken care of before I am off so that's all I got for today.
When faced with a decision to do something for your health or do something for leisure, will you choose your health above all else?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
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Moving right along we are at Tuesday already, My weekend if I am being honest was very much less than stellar with the diet and exercise. I did not get out on a bike ride all weekend and I went over on my calories Sunday and Monday because of a hectic day on Monday but Sunday was just being lazy with the caring about counting. Saturday we went on our annual apple picking day to a local orchard and ended up with about 30 pounds of freshly picked apples, I figured that walking around at a fair/festival for more than 4 hours counted as some movement but I still felt bad about missing out on a real workout. Sunday turned into an all out clean the house kind of day and I did ok until one of my daughters friends stopped by for a "play date" and brought a big ol plate of m&m cookies that were still warm, lets just say that I could not resist. I was very restless yesterday and we ended up taking down our awning out in the back yard and doing some yard clean up while the kids jumped into the pile of leaves that was raked up but I ate too much throughout the day and this morning when I weighed myself I am more than up and feel stupid for my poor eating choices over the long weekend.
Its funny how eating is still a "demon" for me, it is a constant struggle to resist the bad stuff while packing the good stuff in even at this stage of the game. I will recall part of my yesterday and show you how it just happens and then an instance where its plain and simply just stupid decisions which when I step out of that it was me and look at it could use the word addict to describe it. Wify and myself were boxing some stuff to pack away for the winter in the knee wall upstairs and she was upstairs while I was down at this point, I had a pot of chicken soup cooking on the stove and had just eaten a banana with peanut butter as a between lunch and dinner snack. I look up on the shelf and see a bag of trail mix that wify bought the day before and reached in, took a handful and started munching on it, now you should know at this point my calories for the day are always figured out and that banana was all that I could afford yet here I was eating trail mix?
After I finished the trail mix I quickly did a calculation in my head and figured out that I had just eaten about an extra 200 calories so I justified it and thought "ok so I will end at 1900 today no worries". My dinner was about 600 calories, we made breakfast for dinner, I made a scramble with onions, peppers, potato and egg whites and with that we had turkey sausage to which I had given myself six of the little breakfast sausages to have with dinner. I could have skipped the sausages and come in right at 1700 calories, skip breakfast sausages? on what planet would this be acceptable? ummm this one fat boy! but alas I did not skip them, instead I had eight instead of six! Holy fuvk?? really? hmmmm yes indeed so my dinner was now instead of 605 calories it came in at 675 when I was already over for the day by 200! that isn't even the bad part of the day.
Dinner was finished and I was now at 1975 calories, it is what it is, lesson learned and tomorrow will be perfect because it has to be after this monstrosity of a day. Wify hit the sack early and I decided that I would watch "The Event" before following suit and when it was finished I wasn't tired so Pawn Stars it was, I wandered into the kitchen to fill my bottle of water up and made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while I was in there, Wait!? what?? Yes a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at 10:15 PM on a school night, Calvins in a ball on the front seat....skip that last part. The worse part? after slathering the peanut butter onto the bread I thought "Don't do it stupid" I $hit you not I actually thought that! yet down the hatch it went. Lets us add that 285 calories to the already over budget 1975 and I come in at a grand total of 2260 for my Monday, Mama would be proud! bleh.. I am completely disgusted with that decision mostly because I caught myself as I was making that late night ass padding and still ate it.
This is the point where understanding that food can be and is for many people an addiction is important. I have been at this for what will be three years this January and am motivated beyond belief currently yet consumed a 285 sandwich on top of an already calorie dense day about 30 minutes before bed. Why? what was the driving force behind the late night snack? was it like a shark when it smells blood? it just reacts, is peanut butter like blood in the water to us fatties? is this something that will be with me forever? at this point I have to suspect that yes it is and will be because if I am almost three years down the road of eating better and living a healthy lifestyle yet eat a peanut butter sandwich before bed even after catching that it was happening this runs deeper than just liking the way something tastes.
Slip ups will happen, this is just something that has to be understood because when they happen it can do one of two things, we can see it for what it is and realize that each and every one of us is human and will slip from time to time or we can allow it to become the hard center of a giant snow ball rolling uncontrolled down the slope. Even after habits are made these things can happen and I refuse to beat myself up, make excuses or hide the fact that there are times where I struggle with making the best choice. What I will do is continue to reach towards my goals and bust my ass in and out of the gym to help it all along, I believe that most people that fail with weight loss do so because one small failure like a late night peanut butter sandwich snow balls into an oh woe is me state of mind and when that happens its all over.
That's all I got for today.
"Failure is not falling down, its refusing to get back up."
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