Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Choices are what we make of them and every day of each and every week we will be faced with decisions on whether to workout or stay home, eat this or not eat that and each and every one of those choices are ours to make, we own every last one of them. Deciding to do what we need to is not always the easiest or most convenient of things, we have to miss out on a slice of birthday cake or pass on a beer with a buddy sometimes and these little things though not so important in the grand scheme are in fact things that we enjoy but making the good choice to enjoy them in moderation is key. The alternative is missing out on almost everything that life has to offer, of course I am talking about when a person weighs north of 500 pounds like I did not so long ago but I am sure that it applies to lighter people as well. The things that I am capable of at this very moment in life are more opposite than day and night and making good choices is how I changed where I was in life with my health.
Going to the gym at night is sort of odd for me because I love going at that time because I feel like I get in an awesome workout yet it means that my sleep will suffer because I am all kinds of pumped up and getting to sleep is impossible. Last night I was faced with a decision to go to the gym and have my sleep be less than optimal or stay home and miss out on working out for the day so off I went about 8:30 last night to get a workout into my day. I thought about how the biggest loser was on and I usually watch it and going to the gym I would miss it as it was a weight lifting day and I could either watch fat people work out or be a fat person working out so off I went. After 25 minutes on the stationary bike I headed over for some weight lifting which lasted about 50 minutes then back over to the treadmill for 25 minutes at a brisk pace on a decently steep incline. I must be neglecting my walking/running because my feet started hurting in the places where they hurt when I don't run for a while and the inside of one of my toes feels rubbed this morning, I suppose that means I need to do some more sprints at the gym in the coming weeks.
Two days from now I will weigh in again for the blog, I need to drop 2 pounds to stay on track with my goal of weighing 275 or less by April 1st and I am planning on doing everything in my power to get there. The food gods are not on my side though if I am being honest, I mentioned our annual trip to the orchard and some 30 pounds of apples that we have and its that time of year for me to make my 9 pound apple pie. Now I don't know if the pie actually weighs 9 pounds but its damn close and I have to make it as I have been making it for years and my family enjoys it. I have in the last couple years changed the recipe a tad bit by using Splenda in place of the sugar that's in it but it is still a hefty slice of yumminess, decisions decisions.
I am at some point today going to be riding down a bike trail somewhere because the days of doing so are numbered with winter on its way and these rides really are therapeutic for me. I found a section of a trail that I want to try out but its a bit of a ride to get to the trail head so perhaps next week as a planned ride leaving early or perhaps a weekend ride. A weekend slip will not derail me, nothing will derail me because I have something to finish and that's going to be the plan until I get to that 275 pound goal. Making goals is kind of silly yet they do so much for us as we tread forward with our healthy living plans, When I began I could not walk 1/3 of a mile comfortably and riding a bicycle was not an option. My goal was to be able to actually live and I am doing that so in that respect I have accomplished what I set out to do which is to not feel caged in my own body but now its tome to get into a place with my health that I will have surpassed just living comfortably and excel in a way that I am above average with my physical self.
Wow fat man! you are going for above average physically? indeed I am my good people and I will do it right in front of your eyes so that you can see that it is possible to do so without any fancy pay as you go diet plans or surgeries or or or... With that said its time to end this post because I need to start getting ready for a bike ride this afternoon and I have some chores around the house to get taken care of before I am off so that's all I got for today.
When faced with a decision to do something for your health or do something for leisure, will you choose your health above all else?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
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Moving right along we are at Tuesday already, My weekend if I am being honest was very much less than stellar with the diet and exercise. I did not get out on a bike ride all weekend and I went over on my calories Sunday and Monday because of a hectic day on Monday but Sunday was just being lazy with the caring about counting. Saturday we went on our annual apple picking day to a local orchard and ended up with about 30 pounds of freshly picked apples, I figured that walking around at a fair/festival for more than 4 hours counted as some movement but I still felt bad about missing out on a real workout. Sunday turned into an all out clean the house kind of day and I did ok until one of my daughters friends stopped by for a "play date" and brought a big ol plate of m&m cookies that were still warm, lets just say that I could not resist. I was very restless yesterday and we ended up taking down our awning out in the back yard and doing some yard clean up while the kids jumped into the pile of leaves that was raked up but I ate too much throughout the day and this morning when I weighed myself I am more than up and feel stupid for my poor eating choices over the long weekend.
Its funny how eating is still a "demon" for me, it is a constant struggle to resist the bad stuff while packing the good stuff in even at this stage of the game. I will recall part of my yesterday and show you how it just happens and then an instance where its plain and simply just stupid decisions which when I step out of that it was me and look at it could use the word addict to describe it. Wify and myself were boxing some stuff to pack away for the winter in the knee wall upstairs and she was upstairs while I was down at this point, I had a pot of chicken soup cooking on the stove and had just eaten a banana with peanut butter as a between lunch and dinner snack. I look up on the shelf and see a bag of trail mix that wify bought the day before and reached in, took a handful and started munching on it, now you should know at this point my calories for the day are always figured out and that banana was all that I could afford yet here I was eating trail mix?
After I finished the trail mix I quickly did a calculation in my head and figured out that I had just eaten about an extra 200 calories so I justified it and thought "ok so I will end at 1900 today no worries". My dinner was about 600 calories, we made breakfast for dinner, I made a scramble with onions, peppers, potato and egg whites and with that we had turkey sausage to which I had given myself six of the little breakfast sausages to have with dinner. I could have skipped the sausages and come in right at 1700 calories, skip breakfast sausages? on what planet would this be acceptable? ummm this one fat boy! but alas I did not skip them, instead I had eight instead of six! Holy fuvk?? really? hmmmm yes indeed so my dinner was now instead of 605 calories it came in at 675 when I was already over for the day by 200! that isn't even the bad part of the day.
Dinner was finished and I was now at 1975 calories, it is what it is, lesson learned and tomorrow will be perfect because it has to be after this monstrosity of a day. Wify hit the sack early and I decided that I would watch "The Event" before following suit and when it was finished I wasn't tired so Pawn Stars it was, I wandered into the kitchen to fill my bottle of water up and made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while I was in there, Wait!? what?? Yes a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at 10:15 PM on a school night, Calvins in a ball on the front seat....skip that last part. The worse part? after slathering the peanut butter onto the bread I thought "Don't do it stupid" I $hit you not I actually thought that! yet down the hatch it went. Lets us add that 285 calories to the already over budget 1975 and I come in at a grand total of 2260 for my Monday, Mama would be proud! bleh.. I am completely disgusted with that decision mostly because I caught myself as I was making that late night ass padding and still ate it.
This is the point where understanding that food can be and is for many people an addiction is important. I have been at this for what will be three years this January and am motivated beyond belief currently yet consumed a 285 sandwich on top of an already calorie dense day about 30 minutes before bed. Why? what was the driving force behind the late night snack? was it like a shark when it smells blood? it just reacts, is peanut butter like blood in the water to us fatties? is this something that will be with me forever? at this point I have to suspect that yes it is and will be because if I am almost three years down the road of eating better and living a healthy lifestyle yet eat a peanut butter sandwich before bed even after catching that it was happening this runs deeper than just liking the way something tastes.
Slip ups will happen, this is just something that has to be understood because when they happen it can do one of two things, we can see it for what it is and realize that each and every one of us is human and will slip from time to time or we can allow it to become the hard center of a giant snow ball rolling uncontrolled down the slope. Even after habits are made these things can happen and I refuse to beat myself up, make excuses or hide the fact that there are times where I struggle with making the best choice. What I will do is continue to reach towards my goals and bust my ass in and out of the gym to help it all along, I believe that most people that fail with weight loss do so because one small failure like a late night peanut butter sandwich snow balls into an oh woe is me state of mind and when that happens its all over.
That's all I got for today.
"Failure is not falling down, its refusing to get back up."
Friday, October 08, 2010
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Lets get Friday off to a good start shall we? Of course as soon as I got up I headed for the scale, warm feet hit cold hard wood and I was off after a brief stop in the little boys room. Last week I weighed in at 334.4 pounds as my starting point and I gave myself a goal to be at or under 275 by April 1st 2011, that equated to a 2.26 pounds per week average that I will need to drop to reach that goal. As per usual on weigh in days I step on and off 3 times just to make sure that the same number is displayed and all three times the scale flashed a 331.0lbs on there and that is a 3.4 pound drop this week! not a bad start giving the fact that I need 2.26 to stay on track for my goal.
I haven't a clue what this bike weighs but wanted to put one up here today just because its a weigh in day and who doesn't like an all chrome motorcycle?
This week I stayed within my calories, I went to the gym every day and the scale is telling me that I did it right this time around and to think that I almost skipped going to the gym yesterday. The day was gloomy, it was unseasonably cold outside and I was feeling very tired but I made myself go because its what I need to do and the old me would have stayed home so with those two things I decided that it was time to get up off of my ass and do something. I got to the gym and did my 20 minutes on the stationary bike and decided to punish my chest, shoulders and arms with some weight training and that I did! after about an hour and some minutes later it was back on the bike for another 15 minute ride just for kicks. I was feeling awesome about half way through the weight lifting and was glad that I went. Walking out of the gym it was like I was in a movie, the gloom had gone, the sun had come out and I was in an incredible mood, I got in my car, popped in a mixed CD and was caught getting into "when doves cry" a little too much by a fellow gym goer on my way out of the lot.
This week was a good week for the health and weight loss in general, I got some weight lifting in, lots of cardio and am down 3.4 pounds for my efforts. The rain has stopped and we're suppose to have some fantastico weather here in New England for the next week so perhaps another ride report soon! I will finally get to go give the new pedals on my bike a real test and I think that I am going to go for a new personal distance record on my next ride. I mapped out a 20 mile ride on the rail trail which will be 2 miles longer than my previous long ride with the option to make it 24 miles by going to the next trail head depending on how I am feeling. Over all I am pleased with the 3.4 pounds that has been dropped from my bones and the plan is to keep on keepin on until I get to where I want and need to be with my health and weight.
With that, I have nothing more for today and I need to get some things done this morning before I get out for some movement, will it be the gym? perhaps a bicycle ride? not sure yet but rest assured that I will be out there sweating more pounds off before this day is done.
What is your plan for the week? how will you better your health?
Thursday, October 07, 2010
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Ahhhh a whole week down in this new "goal" that I have set fourth for myself, will I be down the 2.26 pounds that I need to be in order to stay on track? will I fall short? surpass the goal? honestly I don't know because the weight has been toying with me on a daily basis all week. If going off of this mornings weight I should make that 2.26 pound mark but yesterday I was lower than this and the day before higher so I don't know what to expect for the weigh in tomorrow morning. Have I done my part? absolutely I would say yes I have, My calories have been perfect other than going over a bit yesterday, hydration has been right where it should be and I have been to the gym every day this week so if going off of that I should be where I need to be but only tomorrows scale reading shall tell.
My intake for Wednesday was a little high coming in at 1890 total calories because of an upset stomach right before bed which I drank 8oz of 1% milk in an attempt to settle it but its not much over at any rate. I started my day off with a HUGE scrambled egg plate which held me over pretty good as I didn't feel hunger until almost dinner time!
What I started with
This is the end product, and of course I had hot green tea with it.
Here is a look at the whole menu from Wednesday.
5 egg whites 75
1 whole egg 70
4oz potato 100
smart balance 25
3 slices turkey bacon 105
oatmeal cookie zone bar 170
1 deli slim 100
1 cup eggplant/beans 135
2oz roasted chicken breast 100
1 banana 105
1.5 T peanut butter 140
5oz roasted chicken breast 250
3/4 cup white rice 150
1/2 cup black beans 110
1 banana 105
8oz 1% milk 110
My day today will follow suit with what I have been doing, I will be at the gym at some point today where I will do at least 30 minutes of cardio followed by 45 to 60 minutes of weight lifting and probably some kind of light cardio to cool down. My intake will not exceed 1700 calories and I will drink at least a gallon and a half of fluids, more than likely more than that even. The scale will whisper softly into my ear tomorrow morning and whatever it says shall be posted here no matter what it says and I will update the goal tracker thingy that I put on the side bar.
Any way that its cut my life has completely changed from how I was living it just over two and a half years ago, I can honestly say that I have done more physical activities in those same years than I had done in the 7 years prior to starting down this path to better health. Won't you join me in living a healthier life? if you are on the fence about making the choice to better your life by losing some weight and or getting healthier I say swing that leg over and hop on down because the longer that you wait the longer it will take for you to get there.
That concludes this episode of as the fat guy turns, now get up off of your ass and do something about that fat on your bones.
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