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Starting over isn't easy

Thursday, January 24, 2013

If I'm really serious about losing these annoying 15 lbs and getting back in shape I have to finally commit to starting over again. And making that commitment means holding myself accountable and actually keeping track of whatever it is I'm doing.

My whole routine has become so loose and all over the place. Some days I only eat one actual meal but lots of snacks, other days I'll have 3 meals that are probably too large in the portion department. I've been eating out too often (not fast food but restaurants which is just as bad sometimes) and eating too many sweets in between and after meals. On top of that, my workout regimen is completely non-existent and I can't even remember when the last time was that I actually had any type of regular workout schedule. I walk all the time (on average 40 minutes to an hour at least 6 days a week) but that still doesn't take the place of heart pumping, muscle toning workouts.

I desperately need structure again. I need to make somewhat of a plan and try to follow through. Some key things that have always helped me in the past and that I know will help me again are:

-Working out. Plain and simple I need to exercise again. Completing a 40 minute workout DVD 3-5 days a week really isn't a lot to ask of myself.

-Stocking up on healthy snacks. KEEP TRACK of whatever sweets and less healthy snacks I do eat.

-Counting calories and pre-planning meals as often as possible

That's it. Seems so simple and in theory it really is. But getting back into those simple little habits when they're no longer habitual is a pain in the a$$ to be perfectly honest. However I know whenever I do get back into more of a structured routine, I will feel so good about myself, and that of course will make it well worth the aggravation and cranky mood swings I may be experiencing in the beginning.

I just completed Turbo Jam Cardio Party. The 40 minute workout I used to frequently break a sweat to, but would still energetically complete start to finish. Today I had to stop several times to catch my breath or wait for the cramps in my sides to dissipate. My arms and legs felt clumsy and heavy when I remember I used to feel so athletic and almost graceful doing certain moves. I'm not surprised considering it's been well over a year since I've used this DVD. But it's a bit of a wakeup call because I know how out of shape I've gotten and how I need to get back on track. At least I completed the workout beginning to end, but I'm eager to get back to where I used to be. I'm pretty sure if I stick with it it actually won't take me very long to struggle a lot less than I did today.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TACOMALO 5/31/2013 1:14AM

    Good luck at your reboot! I just started again, and had to hunt down your profile because your story is super, super inspirational.

You're gonna kick some butt!

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KIM_22 5/17/2013 11:36PM

    I know this is an older blog, but wanted to say I'm right there with you! I've got 15 pesky pounds to take off. Started fresh this week and so far so good (go me!). Best thing is that I think I've finally (knock on wood) found a plan that will work for me. It's gonna be hard work, "but nothing worth having was ever achieved without effort". Cheers to us! This will be our year :)

Thanks for sharing!

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/8/2013 12:02PM

    emoticon emoticon
I know what you mean. I've gone thru phases where I don't track my food and it's always such a PITA to start back up again! hope all is well with you :-)

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HEARTBUBBLE 1/29/2013 12:01PM

    This was really great for me to read because I'm just starting back in with stringing all the healthy habits together since right before 1st of New Year after 15 years off, more or less. I need to give myself the credit for keeping with the commitment I want to shape my life in healthy ways and part of that is not self-downing when I'm less than perfect! It's good to see that those of us who have met major milestones still need the mental maintenance. I might as well get over thinking "I'm finished" at jump. Thanks to your sharing, I'm going to really work at building in that thinking. I already know I have "persisting through discomfort" (whether physical, mental, social etc challenge) so I want to really get through that/have it stick as a life lesson that changes me for the better. emoticon

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STARPESCADO 1/25/2013 5:30PM

    You can do it!
Its human to have setbacks, but we all just have to get back on track and remember how good it feels to be healthy and full of energy - huggies!

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4A-HEALTHY-BMI 1/24/2013 10:08PM

    With you! Both on the need to get back into a schedule and on re-removing an unwanted 15 lbs.

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LUCKY8GAL 1/24/2013 9:46PM

    Though you cannot go back and start again, you can start from now and have a brand new end. - Unknown emoticon

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AMBERNICHOLE3 1/24/2013 5:01PM

    You'll get there..we all fall down sometimes.

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TASHISNOQUITTER 1/24/2013 4:03PM

    I know the feeling all too well. But I gained back 48 pounds :( and I really am starting all over. I am also doing TJ and Im going to Zumba a couple days a week :) we can do this!

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WHOVIANGIRL23 1/24/2013 3:57PM

    I gotta say YAY TURBO JAM because she is one of the only workouts I can do for an extended period of time and not get sick of them. Also, I'm glad you mentioned it. Because I just remembered that I have the same one, and I can do it. Yay again.

I do the 30 minute Fat Blaster one (pink case), and had been doing it for about half a year (last year when I was doing so well with weight loss) and it's like you said. I had become almost graceful doing the moves. I felt powerful as I surged from one move to the next. Then I tried to work out for the first time after an 8 month break (in which I gained 53 pounds, oh gawd) and I thought the world was going to end. I was gasping for air, I kept having to stop, my muscles didn't want to move, my body didn't want to listen... I thought for sure I would never get back into it. But here it is, 3 weeks in, and I'm back to feeling more powerful again. It'll take about a week to get back into the groove, but once you do, you will feel so in control and proud of yourself.

You can do it!

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5 years!!!

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Well hello all emoticon

It's been forever since I've posted a blog! I'd like to post a more detailed blog soon but for now I'm going to keep it short. It just dawned on me earlier that today is January 12, 2013. In other words, it's my 5TH Spark People Anniversary!! Wow. Unbelievable to me that it's been 5 years since I joined. I joined this website after losing 60 lbs, but still weighing in at 242 lbs. One year after my initial join date I lost 100 lbs. 5 years later, here I am floating around the low 150's. I'm about 15 lbs from where I'd really like to be, but I'm still pretty happy with my progress and maintenance as a whole over the years.

Maintenance hasnt been easy at times, but I'm still hanging in there, doing my thing. Some improvements need to be made, but I will get there, and I will reach my goal by my 29th birthday in May emoticon

Hope all is well with all of you out there! Expect to see another blog and maybe new pics in the near future!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/8/2013 12:00PM

    I can't believe I missed these blogs. off to catch up on your more recent one but glad to see you are still rocking your major weight loss :-)

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IMSUNSHINE 3/6/2013 12:29PM

    Thanks for sharing your story!! You are such an inspiration!!!

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BUSYGRANNY5 1/13/2013 7:33AM

    Fantastic! Happy, Happy 5th Anniversary to you!!!!

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BLUE42DOWN 1/12/2013 11:47PM

    HAPPY HAPPY emoticon !!!!

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FINALLY an update blog! *PICS*

Sunday, April 01, 2012



Happy April Spark Friends! Remember me? Long time no see. Anyone still out there? lol Has it really been almost 9 months since my last blog entry? Wow! I'm really slacking here. I think this calls for a brief update. I feel like so much has happened since my last blog but these are the highlights.

1) I started a new job a couple of months ago. I'm working as a dental assistant now. Crazy active job I don't sit down at all during my shift! I love it though and it's not too bad because it's not a very long day. For a while now I always thought I'd go back to school to persue a career path in the dietician/nutritionist field but now I'm considering going to school to be a dental hygienist. Anyway here's a couple of crappy pics I took on my cell phone at work in my scrubs (PS scrubs are amazing. What's better than basically PJs being your work uniform? lol)


Another big update is that I've finally had a little bit of luck in the dating department emoticon emoticon I'm not someone who has ever been opposed to the idea of online dating and know a few people who have had successful love matches after finding eachother on the internet. But still I could never imagine myself going through with actually joining any type of dating website. My other issue was that I've always been too timid to truly put myself out there in the "real world" or accept advances from any guy who's ever expressed any type of interest. I was basically waiting for someone to fall out of the sky and find me without me being required to put any real effort into it. And as luck would have it, that's kind of what ended up happening lol. I was "found" by someone on (oddly enough) another weight loss website I'm on. He sent me a very short and sweet private message, and I responded and we hit it off immediately, saw how much we had in common in so many ways and it snowballed into what we have going on right now. I've been talking to him since October and we finally met in February (he lives in Canada and I'm in NY soo yeah it's pretty long distance. Not ideal but...whatever. lol) He stayed for a few days in NYC and we really had an amazing time together. He gave me my first real Valentine's Day and made it really special for me. He's coming back in April and I can't wait to see him again.


Oh yeah and these were unexpectedly sent to me the other week emoticon


In much unhappier news, this coming week I have to have one of my cats put to sleep. In my last blog in July I talked about having my 17 year old cat Squeakers put to sleep unexpectedly. Just a few months later here I am again with my other 17 year old cat Sneakers. However this has been a long time coming with this cat and it's definitely time. Sneakers was diagnosed with FIV 2 years ago and is also blind in one eye (glaucoma caused by the FIV) Ever since then, his health has slowly but steadily declined. The end of January he had what appeared to be an upper respiratory infection but it turned out to be an infected tooth which turned into an abscess. The poor guy's head was so swollen, even towards the top of his head near his ear. At the vet they drained the abscess and gave him a strong dose of antibiotics and sent him home with pain killers too. He would have needed most of his teeth pulled as well as a thorough teeth cleaning but would need to be put under anethesia for that. At his age and with the FIV that's very risky. After having a full blood panel done, we also saw he's in renal failure so even if putting him under anestheia was a risk I was willing to take, they can't do that when an animal is in renal failure. Despite his issues he's still up and about and has a ravenous appetite. However I have had to bring him back to the vet at least every other week for more antibiotics and pain meds. At this point he can't keep any weight on despite eating constantly, he for some unknown reason has lost nearly all of the fur on his back, and his infection keeps coming back. At this point the abscess came back but this time on the outer part of his face and he has an open hole that will not heal/close (probably because of his compromised immune system from his age and FIV) It's apparent to me he's never going to get better and now the infection is speading to his bone. He look obviously uncomfortable to me despite the topical ointments and pain meds I've been giving him. His quality of life is so poor and it's something I know will only continue to get worse in probably a very short period of time. I've had a lot of time to think it over and after my last trip to the vet on Friday I know it's time to let him go. emoticon He's suffering at this point and it's not fair to keep him alive hanging on by a thread. Our vet makes house calls and even does euthanasia at home so I made an appointment for my vet to come over and put my poor guy to sleep to finally give him some much needed peace after this long battle with his multiple illnesses. He has been so stressed and unhappy being stuffed into his carrier every other week and going back and forth to the vet. I don't want to bring him to the vet again and have that be his last memory. This way he'll go peacefully in my arms in his home where he won't experience any stress whatsoever. It's the kindest thing I can do for him and as heart wrenching as this is for me to have to go through this again, at the same time I'm mostly at peace with it because I know there is no other option for him at this point. He was always an indoor/outdoor cat (he was rescued as a kitten from my yard) but has been indoor only ever since his FIV/glaucoma diagnosis. He lived to a ripe old age and has had a good life. It's supposed to be sunny and pretty warm this week so since he still loves to sit outside on our lawn, I'll keep him on his leash so he can enjoy the nice weather. I also bought a few packages of ground chicken and some cans of tuna. Luckily he stil has a major appetite and still gets excited over poultry and tuna so I'm going to let him feast on as much of it as he wants these next few days.

This is Sneakers in his healthier days. Makes me sad to look at this picture because it almost looks like a completely different cat

Moving on. Let's talk about weight briefly. To be completely honest I could not tell any of you when the last time I weighed myself was. I don't even know the last time I accurately tracked my food in my food journal. I know I've been snacking way too much, but I'm also very active so I don't feel like I'm gaining much, but I know I'm at least maintaining a weight that is higher than I'd like. I'm going to guess here I'm probably at or around 150 now but I'll know for sure when I weigh myself next week (I still refuse to weigh myself when TOM comes around) Either way I'll update my tracker whenever I weigh myself next. Now that the warmer weather is approaching and it will be time to start wearing short sleeve and sleeveless tops and eventually bathingsuits (ahhhhhhh!!) I would like to shave off a minimum of 10 lbs, but possibly closer to 15. I've been gauging my size/weight on how my clothes fit and nothing seems much different than it did towards the end of 2011. But then again, I wanted to lose weight all those months ago and I know for a fact I havent. I'm back to tracking today and would like to get back into that habit pretty consistently. When my weight creeps up I know tracking and calorie counting is the only way I'll successfully lose these extra pounds.

So that's pretty much it for now. Hopefully I'll get back into the blogging routine too. I miss it and I've missed all of you! I still come here and check my messages pretty often so even if I'm not posting things too often, I'm still around. I hope everyone has been well and that 2012 has been going great for all of you out there!!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1NEWPAM 4/24/2012 7:02PM

    First of all, you are SO BEAUTIFUL inside and out, and such an amazing inspiration. I am so happy for you that you've found love. You look adorable together- and very happy!

I couldn't help crying when you talked about you kitty. It's so hard to let them go. But I think you're absolutely doing the best thing. It's so hard to accept that all of our relationships (basically) come and go. Even relationships with critters. I think it would be so great if the ones we love could always be with us, but........

Oh yea, and on a lighter note, I LOVE the jelly bean background. Thanks for the blog and the inspiration and keep up the good work. Pam

PS. Oh yea, I forgot to mention, I'm a nurse, and one of my favorite things about it is wearing scrubs- and you're right- they're so comfy, it's kinda like wearing pjs to work! emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/24/2012 7:05:17 PM

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MILDOLLARSMILE 4/24/2012 4:21PM

    Thanks for the update! We are still here. I have acutally started back in Feb. I am so sorry to hear about your cat, it's so hard when we have to put them down, so much like family! I am super happy for you that you found someone and in weight loss department! I'm not liking the dating thing, men can be well, more complicated than women. I will just say that, LOL!! Keep up the great work girl!! Love that you're living your life and enjoying it with that someone special and loving the career path!! Welcome back!!

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SWIMMING_CAT 4/5/2012 10:49AM

    So sad about your cat. I too lost two cats in the last three years and I know how important they can be in our heart...
Congrats for your new job and new man! Funny thing is you actually physically look very much like my previous dental hygienist!

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ENGLISHROSE84 4/4/2012 7:43PM

    I've been away for a long time and have just started sparking again with approx 80lbs to lose as my goal. When I looked at your picture I didn't recognise you at all...then I saw your blonde picture and it all came back! WHAT A TRANSFORMATION! Loving the brown hair!

Thank you for reminding me that this is possible with time and effort.x

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 4/2/2012 4:14PM

    Thanks for the update, Kristen! We missed you. You have some very exciting stuff going on with a new job and a guy!
So very sorry to hear about your cat, but I think what you're doing for him is very kind. emoticon

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VADAVICTORIA 4/2/2012 11:07AM

    Sorry to hear about your cat - losing a pet is always tough but at least there's comfort in knowing that Sneakers is no longer in pain.

Congratulations on your new job and new love interest... the flowers he sent are pretty!

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ROMANS_8 4/2/2012 10:53AM

    Losing a pet is awful! I just had to put my 10 year old dog down. It was one of the hardest decisions to make, but like your cat, it was time and I had to let her go. :( On a happier note, congrats on all the positives in your life. Your pics are cute and it doesn't look like you have gained at all!

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GODZYFAN 4/2/2012 9:24AM

    Welcome back! Sorry about your kitty but glad to hear many other things are going well for you. Congrats on all the good news!

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REEBADABEEBOOS 4/2/2012 12:39AM

    It's great to hear an update from you. I'm sorry to hear about your cat.

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SINGAWOLFSONG 4/1/2012 9:22PM

    I cried for your cat :( I can only imagine how painful that would feel.

On a happier note, thank you for updating us!

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ADDYSGETTINFIT 4/1/2012 6:41PM

    Welcome back, sweetie! Yep, we're still here, lol. So sorry to hear about your kitty. But I'm glad you're doing well otherwise. Hugs, hon!

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LOVELYW14 4/1/2012 6:02PM

    I love your glasses in the first picture! I am sorry to hear about your cat. I am super excited that things in the love department is coming along for you. Also, I started tracking again today too! I wish you much success! Happy to have you back!

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JO_GEE 4/1/2012 3:22PM

    So good to see an update from you! Congrats on the new job and new man! ;)

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ATHIMAE 4/1/2012 2:16PM

    I'm sorry to hear about sneakers :( As a pet owner and lover I empathize with your pain, and commend you for doing a brave and thoughtful thing for Sneakers.

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Good luck on your new romance and the last 10-15 lbs!

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WENDYLADY003 4/1/2012 2:15PM

    I'm glad to see you're back!!! Congrats on everything you have going on, a new job AND a new boy, you win!!!

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HARLOW10 4/1/2012 2:14PM

    I agree that scrubs are amazing. So comfortable! Congrats on the job.

And I'm really sorry about your cat. It is so tough to do, I know.

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Feeling like complete crap

Monday, July 11, 2011

Haven't posted a blog in a while. Nothing exciting or positive to report so..whatever. Haven't lost any weight. I'm sure I've gained some since I last updated my ticker but I haven't gotten around to weighing myself. Maybe one of these days.. I went on "vacation" the other week to visit family (I use the word vacation very loosely but I'm not even going to go into that now) I have some new pics I'll upload at some point.

Honestly I've been so stressed and overwhelmed with countless things I can't even go into right now. The cherry on the cake was a week ago, the day I came home from "vacation" I had to put my 17 y/o cat to sleep. I can't believe the shape I found him in when I came home. Welcome home right? Horrible day. I've never had to make the decision to euthanize a pet. I feel guilty and horrible and depressed about it.

Now my other cat (my orange Tabby Oliver) who is basically the center of my universe, MAY have intestinal lymphoma. He used to be close to 20 lbs but he's lost a lot of weight and throws up several times a week and has chronic diarrhea. He's going in for an ultrasound tomorrow so figure out if it's possibly IBD, or worst case scenerio if it's intestinal lymphoma. Sounds naive, but I never even took into consideration that Oliver could ever even get sick. I've had him since he was 2 weeks old. Had to be bottle fed and all. And now he's almost 13 years old and seemed to be in great health, with the exception of these vomitting/diarrhea episodes. I thought maybe he had a parasite or maybe it was his food. Unforunately it's probably some kind of chronic condition. Hopefully not the big "C" but I'll have a better idea tomorrow. I wanted to postpone his ultrasound and try and get him insured before we proceed with testing and find out an official diagnosis, but since the vet saw him last week and took notes on his symptoms he wouldnt be approved. Great. I can't afford out of pocket expenses (so many have come up over the last few months I feel like I'm drowning) but I CAN'T not do anything for him. Sigh. One step at a time I guess right?

Basically I'm emotionally spent. I'm depleted and depressed and stressed and miserable in general. Not trying to be dramatic but my pets are like my children and when something happens to them I suffer right along with them. Someone please tell me I'm not the only person who turns into a total basket case when something happens to their pets?

Sorry for the gloomy blog, I try to avoid these, but I've been feeling rather gloomy and unhappy lately (not just with my cats but that's really put me over the edge). Hopefuly more cheerful sentiments will be to come in the near future.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BELLALUCIA 10/13/2011 8:14PM

    I'm sorry about your kittens, my dear!

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RENZRYD 8/2/2011 10:42PM

    emoticon my Sylvia is my and my husbands baby, I know exactly what you are talking about.
-Renee

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NEENSTER1 7/18/2011 4:35PM

    No you are not the only one who gets sick to death about their pets. My cat died and I was a basket case. I never thought I would be so, so, so, sad. emoticon One day at a time, ok.

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MHPFAN 7/13/2011 3:55PM

    You are definitely not the only one who flips when something's wrong with a pet. I'm so sorry to hear everything. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ABBY_G 7/12/2011 4:49PM

    Oh. So sorry about Oliver. I just read your update to your status.

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KSHENELL31 7/12/2011 10:30AM

  I feel for you, being that I have no children. My Patch was my world, everybody knew it. He had constipation one time and my prior boss without question let me off to take him to the vet (of um friendly laughed at me) only to be told to give him pumpkin pie filling. Needless to say he was fine within a few hours but it was day three and I was a concern new mother (my first pet of my own at age 29) that something was really wrong with my baby. So, I can't image your distress. You are not alone in your feelings for your pets. I will be praying for you and Oliver.

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CANDYXPERT 7/11/2011 9:10PM

    I'm so sorry!
I'm a cat person and totally get it.

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BROCOLIJOLI 7/11/2011 8:32PM

    I feel the same way for my pets! I'm so sorry to hear about your 17 yr old cat. I hope Oliver is ok and gets better soon! emoticon

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COMEONEILEEN8 7/11/2011 8:04PM

    Pets are absolutely family and it is heart breaking to see them suffer in any way! Pets have such a presence in your life and it is incredibly difficult to adjust when they are not around you any more. I hope things turn around for you and Oliver is okay! (My dog's name is Oliver too. My kids call him "LaLa") emoticon

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HARLOW10 7/11/2011 7:49PM

    You aren't the only one. A few years ago, I had to put my cat asleep after 19 years with her, and it was so hard. Last year, my dog, who was in ill health had to be put asleep, too. They are like family to me. I'm really sorry for your loss. Don't forget to take care of yourself, too, through all of this.

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CATHY63RED 7/11/2011 5:49PM

    Hang in there one thing an old boss used to say to me was "this too shall pass" and he was right at the time I was going through a divorce and my mother was dying of cancer. Be kind to yourself and seek the support of friends and family. emoticon

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*~*MICHELLE*~* 7/11/2011 5:27PM

    emoticon I am so sorry you are going threw all of this. I do understand!

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LIL_EZZY 7/11/2011 5:26PM

    Everyone needs to vent their problems and it sounds as if you have been having a terrible time. Things will get better and I am so sorry about both of your cats. I have dogs that are my other babies so I do know where you are coming from. I hope all goes well with Oliver and he isn't to bad and whatever he has is fixable. Lots of love to you when you are most in need of it. emoticon emoticon

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SINGAWOLFSONG 7/11/2011 4:24PM

    You're definitely not the only one to go crazy over your pets. Pets are definitely like having children. I personally would be heartbroken if I lost any of mine, let alone decide to put them down. Best wishes to you and your "children." You'll feel better with time.

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K_FERGUS 7/11/2011 3:26PM

    emoticon I'm sorry to hear you are having such a rough time. I'd encourage you to take some time out to exercise and maybe hit a farmer's market to get some fresh produce. Our bodies respond better to stressful situations when we are giving them the fuel that they need. Don't worry about the scale at this point. Take care of yourself and your kitty.

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CALIREDHEAD 7/11/2011 2:50PM

    I travel all the time for work and I see my family a few times a year, and obviously this keeps me from having pets these days. I was on the road as usual, having been away from my new apt for over a month. I was feeling homesick, and I managed to get off work for my first wedding anniversary. Well, the night before my big day, my mother called and told me they had to euthanize our dog (who I call Boo) that I've had since I was 12 (I'm 26 now) that night. I was training in a new girl at work and at the end of the night, and 10 minutes before we closed, my mom and sister called me and told me what was going on as my little Boo slipped away. I think I sobbed for 30 minutes and the new girl thought I was crazy. I trained Boo from when she was a puppy and she was a gift to me and my sister after our younger sister died. She represented so much to me, and it was a stark reminder of how long it's been and how much has happened since then. But it had to be done, because she was suffering. My mom put it off and she was in very bad shape at the end. You made the right choice.

I'm sorry to tell you such a sad story but your post resonated with me. I feel your pain. I'm sorry for your loss; it is nothing to be trivialized. I wish you the best with your Oliver. emoticon

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CARMINACG 7/11/2011 2:49PM

    Im so sorry to hear Oliver isnt feeling well. Its difficult to handel especially in the midst of loosing a loved one so recently. Im no stranger to long health battels with family pets and it is draining. No matter how much you do, you always think you could have done more. Its a parent thing - you said it yourself they are your childeren and I completely agree. Hopefully the prognosis will come back more positive than negative for Oliver. All your pets are/were lucky to have you as their mamma. If you need anyone to chat to just msg me. I swear its like I could have written this blog myself a few months back.

Also 1 tip - you might want to ask your vet - depending on the prognsis - My cat was diagnosed with a Fatty Liver Disease I ended up finding a homeopathic treatment of Milk Thistel Drops. They helped generate new healthy liver cells and we were able to get past the disease. I could administer it myself in a little dropper - and it was a fraction of the price of medication/treatments from the vet.

Wishing you and Oliver lots of luck! :)

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SAMMYSWEETPEA 7/11/2011 2:46PM

    You are definitely not the only person who feels this way about your pets. It's incredible the amount of love we have for them.

Dealing with sick pets is no fun, and you're going through it twice in a short period of time. Please be gentle with yourself.

I'm a border-line crazy cat lady (currently have 4) and I've had to make some difficult decisions over the years. Give yourself lots of time to grieve, and don't feel silly about it. Our pets love us more unconditionally then any person could.

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NCSUALUM03 7/11/2011 2:45PM

    My pets are my life so I completely understand. It is almost impossible to get a pet insured when they become sick/injured so just be forewarned. It's a lesson lived and learned...so that next time we get an animal we get insurance on he/she ASAP. A lot of vets do payment plans so look into it as well as CareCredit, a credit card for pet emergencies. You're in my thoughts....

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 7/11/2011 2:27PM

    emoticonNo, you are not the only one. I can't have pets where I currently live, but I am a huge animal lover and I would feel the same. I'm sorry to hear and I hope everything ends up ok with Oliver. Do not feel guilty about your other cat, you made the right decision and you are a good mommy who chose the best option possible for a cat who was suffering and in pain. You gave him a very good life, I know it. I hope you feel better soon, and can get yourself back on track.

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ANNONYMOUSME 7/11/2011 2:23PM

  I'm so sorry for the loss of your cat and that Tabby Oliver may be sick as well. I hope and pray he has something easy to fix wrong with him. I had my Missy from when she was two weeks old too. We did the bottle feedings and she used to sleep curled up against my neck. She lived 22 years. I hope Tabby Oliver does the same, even surpassing Missy's age. It's hard to let them go, they are our children. Missy died in 2008 (June 25th) and it still makes me cry.

So, no, you're not the only one who feels this way. There are those of us who totally get it and understand.

emoticon

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WISCHY30 7/11/2011 2:19PM

    No, you're not the only one. I have three dogs & seven (yes seven) cats & they're my kids. I'm so sorry about your kittys.

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30 Day Photo Challenge Blog - Day 16

Friday, March 04, 2011

Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.



Without a doubt my daddy! This is one of my favorite pictures I have with my dad. It was taken on March 4th 1989, so 17 years ago to the day. Today actually would have been my dad's 60th birthday. This very day we probably would have been having a huge party to celebrate his milestone birthday, somewhere filled with family and friends. Instead today is just another ordinary day, except maybe a bit sadder.

Anyway, my dad is and always will be my biggest inspiration. From a health/weight viewpoint, I'm so proud of all of the effort he put into trying to reclaim his health. Prior to his first heart attack he was a heavy smoker lived a more sedentary lifestyle and didn't pay attention to his diet whatsoever. A heart attack at 37 scared him enough to quit all of his bad habits immediately. He was adament and determined in reversing whatever damage was done to his heart and I know he really did do everything in his power to improve his health.

In general though, my dad inspires me so much because he lived the kind of life I hope to live one day. He enjoyed every day he was given and seized all opportunities which came is way. He was never someone to be held back by fear or insecurities. He simply did what he loved to do, experienced life to the fullest and did it all with a smile on his face. He was one of the most selfless, upbeat and well-grounded people I've ever known and of course I'll never forget his mischievious sense of humor (I don't think anyone who knew him will!) He was also a loyal friend and a dedicated family man and really valued the "right" things in life. I'll always remember how he made sure he was home every night to have dinner with my mom I and was home every weekend to take me on miscellanous "field trips". I hope at least to some degree, he knew how loved and appreciated he really was by not only me, but basically everyone who knew him so well.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PETITFLOUR 8/22/2011 9:31AM

    So sad to hear that. It must be the biggest loss for you!
But why did you give up your photo challenge? You got so far already!

Good luck!

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LIL_EZZY 5/14/2011 7:02AM

    MY dad is my inspiration too.

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THEBANI 5/5/2011 12:49AM

    Very nice blog. I, too, lost my dad 4 years ago....his first heart attack took the nicest man out of my life :( Devastating when you're a daddy's girl too. I feel your pain. He wasn't even 50 yet...that should have been my wake up call then, but I was an emotional wreck to even understand everything. But, slowly, I'm taking back my life in my hands. I don't know if you watch the Biggest Loser on tv, but it was my first time last night. Of course they surprised one of the participants by having her father there. I pretty much was balling the whole episode...especially when he said "One day I hope to walk you down the aisle". I really wish my dad could see my progress....but I know he's out there encouraging me....our guardian angels! :) emoticon

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JENNYGUMP21 5/1/2011 1:46AM

    My heart goes out to you. Not trying to make you sad but looking at the picture of you giving him a little kiss on the cheek made my eyes well up with tears. You can see how much he loves you. You are such an inspiration to me and just want you to know that even though you handle discussing his memory so well, I am praying for you tonight. Thank you for sharing such a personal story. emoticon

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SWEETRAVIN 3/28/2011 7:44PM

    I just lost my dad 3 months to the day and can very much relate to you on how much love and respect you have for yours. I know your daddy is proud of how far you have come. I come to your page often for inspiration. Keep up all the good work. Your amazing!

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SPUNKYDUCKY 3/10/2011 10:34PM

    Your dad sounds like he was an absolutely incredible person. What a beautiful way to remember him.

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ANNONYMOUSME 3/7/2011 5:17PM

  You're dad sounds like a wonderful human being. I can see why he's your inspiration.

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LOVELYW14 3/5/2011 3:27AM

    My father passed away when he was 64, and I was only 21. This April will mark his 4 year death anniversary. Smoking wasn't my father's downfall but drinking was. I am from the caribbean and our whole family is really huge on the whole drinking thing! He suffered his first heart attack when he was 61 and really made an effort to change his lifestyle. His health issues is one of the forerunners in fighting harder to get healthy myself. No one in my family lives long, but I plan too! Great blog...has me thinking about why I started this journey, and why it is even more important for to finish it! Thanks! emoticon

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