Monday, January 03, 2011
After visiting my dad this last week, I reached that point in life of where you realize that no matter what the past was, there are some things that can reach to the depths of your heart like no other. For me it was seeing my dad cry several times. This is a man who I can't really remember see cry. When we took him to see his wife in the dementia center and saw them look each other in the eye and just start crying, it broke me. No matter how strong you are, there are times when tears need to come and love at its best needs expressed. She thought he was coming to get her out. He couldnt tell her it wasnt. They have been each others support for so many years. Now that time is ending as we make tough decisons in their care and what is best for each of them in their last years. Time can sting, but it also can be so beautiful. This one moment in time was as painful as it was beautiful. I wonder how much we all forget to just love each other on a daily basis because of all the small stuff we make excuses for. Our weight is one of those. We always have an excuse to just eat. What is our excuse to just love unconditionally? To just embrace a moment for its good? To see the positive in light of a bad situation? If we could just work on our mind sets with that simple love for each other and for ourself, would we have all these excuses or could we just enjoy our beauty, honor our bodies, and honor the time we are given. All these thoughts are ringing in my heart, just because I saw my daddy cry once to many.
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
There are days where I ask, Why God do you put something or someone in my life and then as fast as they enter or a situation changes its closed. I am wondering this because lately I really feel like people have entered and exited my life so quickly for various reasons and some situations have come and gone the same. While I know some of this is just life, I still wonder, why does God move us in these immense changes sometimes faster than we can keep up with. Hopefully its He trusts me to do what is right or just be a seed of good hope or love to certain people before they move on to something else. I guess that is called good will. Maybe that is what we all need to remember not just at the holidays but throughout the year. While I am thankful I am strong, flexible, and ever changing, I guess some days I also wish that I could just have a regular day without a worry. I haven't had that for so long, I forgot what its like. So I guess this is where I am supposed to be a good steward of good will. I am not sure I volunteered this, I think its just happened. Hopefully I will get the days of restful peace mixed in with it soon. I can say life has sure been a roller coaster and yet, I am still on for the ride.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
It was good to see so many come out today at the church for a work day when it was so beating hot. Yard work was being done and the inside was being cleaned well. Its refreshing a church. I am so proud how through this time of change waiting to get a new pastor that I have seen so many faithful people keep things going and give of their time and talents. Its a reminder that a church isnt the building, its the people who give of themselves over and over. If we would keep that same mentality in the work force, I think people would love their jobs more and trust would be so much easier. So while we refresh our church, we also need to refresh the spirit that goes with carrying out that same mentality wherever we may be working. Give a helping hand, do the dirty work and not complain, volunteer for the not so good parts and do them with some pride. Not easy to do, but once and awhile we need to say, its ok, I too can give something more.
So as I cleaned grime out of the kitchen floor and changed the color of it, I was reminded that we are preparing to greet and hopefully find our new pastor this next year. How much nicer to come with a sense of a refreshing place to be.
What refreshing moments can we add to that now?
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I read the article today about how people judge themselves against others. Maybe its my old age, but any more I dont care as much about that stuff. I mean welcome to America. We are so obsessed with what everyone else looks like. It isnt until you wake up one day and look in the mirror and realize. Darn it, I have wrinkles. I remember the first time it really hit me. I couldnt possibly be getting old yet. Then I remembered something. When I was young and even into my young adulthood I remember the beautiful visits to see my grandmother. She had these soft wrinkles on her face and when she greeted you with her usual hug and kiss, you felt them. I always just looked at her and thought how beautiful each one was created and that they each told a story of sorts about the passing times in her life. She to me seemed so beautiful in all her wrinkles. Guess what, she never complained about getting old, she never complained about what she did or didnt have, or compare herself to neighbors. She always thought about others and found the best in every situation. Her wrinkles were soft and kind and loving just like her. A wrinkle has life just like everything about us. Now that life may show hardship, it may show kindness, or love, but no matter what it is part of the passage that God gave to us to change us like the seasons of time. We cant fight everything and try to be like everyone else. Time is so much better spent finding ways to enjoy it, embrace good and work to get through the barriers. Each moment is a wrinkle in time and we get to decide what that moment and that wrinkle can do to us. Good or bad, we can choose to look at it as ugly or offensive or holding us back, or we can say its just another part of what I face and embrace the moment to work through whatever the wrinkle may be.
So the wrinkles on my face that are starting now, well they are part of me. And when I think of them, I just remember the many soft wrinkles on my grandmothers loving face. God blessed her to a ripe age of 94. Wow, maybe I'll earn that privilege too. So maybe they aren't so bad after all. Keep smiling. Maybe our wrinkles of time will be good to us.
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