Today

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Harvest is in full swing around here these days. Farmers who were able to get their crops in are having record yields. Many could not get the crops in - it was so wet for so long. Now trying to get them off the wet soggy fields...

Going for a road trip to Cranbrook this weekend. Not really sure if I want to even go, but we are going anyhow. I am just so tired of everything right now. Just want to climb under the covers and never NEVER come out again. Maybe a road trip on a motorcycle will cheer me up. I am meeting with a friend of mine who has a motorcycle here today. Can't wait to see him again. I haven't talked to him in about 2 weeks. We were supposed to meet for lunch yesterday, but we got far too busy. Hoping to see him today...

My friend from Winnipeg has been mia all weekend. He told me he was going fishing and working in Ontario. I figured he would take his phone for texting, but I guess not. Maybe he caught more than he bargained for this past weekend...
Anyhow, it doesn't bother me. He is a nice person to talk to, but not anyone I can see myself with long term.

I am so sick of feeling alone. It's time for a change. I need to decide where I am going to go, and what I am going to do. He just doesn't seem to really care how I feel. Never takes my feelings into consideration. I am getting really REALLY tired of it.

I guess it's time to move on...

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LITTLE_QUEEN 8/24/2010 4:42PM

Katrina, I have not talked to you in a long time, Glad to see you are still on spark and sparking, You do what you have to do, maybe you could go for a run and think about it. Report Inappropriate Comment

Today

Friday, August 20, 2010

He came home late last night. I missed him so much. He actually missed me too. It's looking like he will be home tonight again. The work where they have to stay at the hotel is finished for now. They have a little more to do there - about 2 days. In the meantime, I am glad he's coming home at nights. It is not much time to see him, but it's better than not seeing him at all.

Doris and I are planning a trip to Brandon tomorrow. She wants to get her hair and nails done. I am hoping we can find a place that doesn't cost too much. I wouldn't mind getting my nails done too. I guess we shall see. It was payday the other day, but it didn't go far. Paid off lots of bills, and there is next to nothing left. Still need to get the van serviced. We will have to do it before we go to BC later.

I wish he would tell me more how he feels. I hate it when I wake up feeling kind of blue. I am not secure enough to know for sure things are good, or if I'm imagening that. I am hoping I will come around. I guess if I would just believe things are okay, and they will be.

My iPhone is working again. I still don't have recpetion out here, but it's working when I do get service. I am so glad. Now I can take my time and find a second hand iPhone on ebay or something as a back up just in case.

Didn't get a chance to go out with the dog this morning. It was a different morning. John was in so much pain. His back is out. I mean really out. He shouldn't be working, but you know men. He went in anyway. They started later today - almost noon by the time they all got there. It was nice. We were all able to have breakfast together today for a change.

Looking forward to seeing him tonight. His mom is cooking supper tonght. We will be sure to save him a plate for when he gets home.

It is so nice knowing he will be there tonight. I missed him so much. It surprised even me.

  

Today

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Well, the dog and I went for a nice long walk this morning. I just felt like crying, and John's mother is visiting so I figured the best thing to do was to get out of the house for a bit.

We covered about 2.5miles. Walked over 40minutes at a fairly fast pace. He was worn out when we got back to the house. I needed the exercise. and the cry.

I am really struggling with some things right now. Not sure if I'm coming or going. John's mother Doris is here visiting. It's nice. However, John is still away working. He was originally supposed to come home last night. I think that's why I had such a hard night - he didn't come home. We did drive out to see him. I didn't get a good bye hug when we left. It's because he is not comfortable doing that in front of people he is working with. It still hurt. Then he picked a silly fight with me later that night on the phone. Wouldn't text me back. No good night. No good morning. I am just way WAY too sensitive. I know it. I just need to know he's thinking of me.

Working today. Working tomorrow. Then a possible road trip to Brandon on Saturday. We will see.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWNAC304 8/19/2010 1:51PM

Sorry you're having such a rough time now. My husband is not very affectionate either and doesn't often say he loves me. After 31 years I'm used to it. I know how you feel though. I'mv also very sensitive. I'm sending you a hug. I know it's not the same as coming from John, but it's still a warm hug. Report Inappropriate Comment

BALLOUZOO 8/19/2010 1:25PM

Having a spouse who isn't home is a challenge, especially when it's his mom visiting. Hope things improve soon. Hope your tears cleared away your worries and you feel refreshed to have a better day! Report Inappropriate Comment

My Newest Nephew

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

at 3;24 am marshall michael joesph kuntz joined us weighing in at 11 lbs even. 24 inches long. Huge hands on that little one...

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SAMMYSWEETPEA 8/19/2010 12:30AM

Wow, what a big boy! And handsome too! Congrats! Report Inappropriate Comment

MAGSA10 8/18/2010 11:29PM

on such a beautiful and healthy looking baby boy. I am sure that as his Auntie you are very proud. Have a great week and stay strong and keep on Sparking. Maggie j. Report Inappropriate Comment

TERMITEMOM 8/18/2010 8:46PM

Congratulations Auntie! Very handsome boy! Big and healthy too... Report Inappropriate Comment

ROXYFOX 8/18/2010 7:25AM

He is adorable.. congrats on the new addition to the family. Report Inappropriate Comment

KNITTABLES 8/18/2010 12:03AM

Aw, so cute. Congratulations. Report Inappropriate Comment

MONKEYSJUMP 8/17/2010 10:46PM

11 lbs 24 inches long? Holy heck that is a toddler not a baby! Hope the mama had some good pain meds :) Congratulations. He is gorgeous! Report Inappropriate Comment

UMUCGRAD 8/17/2010 10:40PM

Oh, baby pictures are so precious! Thanks for sharing your family's newest gift! Report Inappropriate Comment

Today

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Well, I survived my night alone with the dog at the house. Yesterday morning I told John we need to talk, especially if we are going to be apart. I need him to tell me how he feels. This morning, when I told him I missed him, I got a smiley face back. I texted back that I give up. He doesn't get it. Never will. I am done fighting to get him to tell me how he feels. I should just shut myself off and just send him smiley faces and not really answer him when he talks to me either. A taste of his own medicine.

Yesterday I heard from Karen that Doris is coming in to Brandon at 11:30pm at the Grey Hound station. Later that night, John was posing as Doris telling me she was coming into the airport at 11:30. When I finally spoke to him and found out it was him posing as her, I told him what Karen had said, and asked him to confirm the location. He started on his usual "I'm right and you don't know what your talking about and my mother would never....." I finally just told him fine. I will go to the airport and wait. If she is not there, he will have to find a way to reach me and get me to the right place.

I am SICK TO DEATH of these guys who believe they are right and everyone else around them is wrong. BITE ME OLD MAN! We've been through this a few times. He believes he knows EVERYTHING about everything, and everyone else is idiots. He actually argued with me that you should eat the skin of the CHICKEN because it holds all the nutrients. This idiot who I had to convince that the nutrients in many fruits and vegetables is in the skin. Now he believes it's the same for meats! What an idiot. Chicken skin is all fats and oils. But he knows, and what do I know....

I know. Enough ranting. I should know better. He is destroying who I am.

Anyhow, his mom is coming in today. I am looking forward to seeing her. I have to drive about 1.5 hours to pick her up. I'm fine with that. I don't mind the drive. I can actually use a nice drive right now...

I need to finish some cleaning at the house. I want to sweep and wash the floors of the upstairs bedroom. I should also find a light bulb for the stairwell. If Doris doesn't want to sleep upstairs, we can set her up downstairs too. I am already sleeping down on the main floor myself. It's not a big deal. Just have to rearrange a few things.