Monday, December 09, 2013
Yesterday ( Sunday ) I prepped some food for the week. I pre-made some salads, a big pot of veggie soup with turkey sausage, and some breakfast sandwiches. I also picked up healthy snacks and plenty more Crystal Light. (Sorry, I just will not drink plain water at this point!)
I tracked my food on Spark today and came in under calories but I am completely satisfied and had 4 meals. I also tracked in my WW planner and came in under points.
I pushed myself to go to the bulk food store today after work and pick up some bulgar to make pilaf and I have some lentils from an earlier trip, so I will be making a healthy version of Mujadarah. herbivoracious.com/2007/10/recipe-mu
jadara.html It is a Lebanese rice and lentil dish with carmelized onion. I use the bulgar in place of rice, go light on the onions, and replace the butter with half the amount of olive oil. I like to top it with a bright green salad. Sounds weird, but it's delicious.
Tomorrow I am going with my 17 year old and her AP history class to see "12 Years A Slave", I am looking forward to it. It's a movie I want to see and of course I enjoy spending time with my daughter. I will go sans popcorn - which I won't like - but I don't need to spend the extra money or calories!
Wednesday the kids and I will be having dinner with my parents and we will watch "Emmett Otter's Jug Band Christmas" (awesome!) with my 4-year-old nephew. Afterward I am going to help out my friend Julie who has a medical issue that she needs assistance with.
Thursday nothing but work. Friday night going to watch a movie and have dinner with Julie. Saturday dinner with my parents and kids and then church.
This doesn't sound like a hugely busy week - but for me it is. I am a couch potato, home body, who likes to stay home with the blinds closed.
So I got through today. DAY ONE without a slip up. It's not much of a streak - but at this point, I'll take it! I'm not looking for perfection - just days that are binge-free for now.
Have a blessed evening,
Friday, December 06, 2013
First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who commented on my last blog post. People here at Spark are the most awesomest ever I've put all of the advice to heart and I am slowly building a plan that will work for me.
I am going to stick with Weight Watchers. As I mentioned earlier, my work pays for it and there are a few other ladies from my office who attend the Monday evening meeting too. That is decision number one.
Next - if I didn't mention it in my last post - there is a gym in the basement of my work. Not a Planet Fitness or anything, but there is a treadmill, elliptical, bike, pilates machine, a couple tvs, and 8-10 other pieces of equipment. Decision #2 is that I will come in 30 minutes early, three times per week and start working out. Endorphins, right?
Starting TODAY I am going to track here on Spark. I am going to a Christmas party tonight, so it isn't the BEST day to start tracking - but then again, maybe it IS the best day to start. LOL But Spark has been a HUGE part of my past successes (I've lost about 50 pounds twice over the past four years - of course gained it back and more) and checking in daily and getting involved is a must.
I do visit a friend of mine once or twice a week. The plan is to see her on Wednesdays and Fridays, but it always seems I am making excuses once a week. I need to make myself go.
I also have dinner with my family on Weds and Saturday. So I am not a complete hermit, lol. Just mostly.
Final decision (goal) for the month is to get back to church regularly. I don't know why I stay away. I love it and it always makes me feel better.
So thank you all, I appreciate it more than you will ever know. Have a terrific on-plan weekend!
Wednesday, December 04, 2013
I am addicted to food. It is my drug of choice. I crave a fix many times every day. I can't be satisfied with a small or normal amount, it always has to be an overabundance. And if it's not - I am in constant craving for the next fix. I feel deprived. I feel out of control, depressed and honestly, just lost. It's a wicked circle because once I fill myself with the carbs, fat, salt, meat and/or whatnot the guilt deepens. The depression reaches new levels. The helplessness grows.
I'm not going to keep whining and give up. That's why I'm here. I need help. I really need some help.
Going to Weight Watchers is a covered benefit through my work. I started going one month ago. I have fought with myself every day since then. I have this amazing opportunity and I am all but wasting it. I've lost approximately 7 pounds the first month. I'm fine with that. A loss is a loss and I'm glad I"m progressing. But it's my inner turmoil that scares me. This inner monster of addiction that claws at my mind when I"m not giving in to it.
I have thought of overeaters anonymous. Perhaps that is the way I should go. But I've always loved Spark. Loved the friendship, comraderie, the groups, blogs, people. IF I can overcome this, it's going to be here. I just know it.
Now for the boring updates on my life!
I took on a 2nd job about two months ago with a general surgeon. I"m sort of a Jane-of-all-trades. It has slowly turned in to a full-time job, so I left the three-doctor practice, which ended up being a nightmare anyway. Long story.
So I work and I come home, watch television and eat. That's about the entirety of my life right now. Sad but true.
I've watched 119 of 121 episodes of Gossip Girl on Netflix. Before that it was Haven. Then Hart of Dixie. Then Revenge. Then Sons of Anarchy, Breaking Bad, Prison Break, etc. etc. For months now.
I guess you could say that I'm in a rut! I've stopped going to church. Don't post much on Facebook. I've become someone that I don't like very much.
Soooooo -- I'll be pulling myself up by my bootstraps and trying my best to gain some strength. Some control. Get some of my inner self back.
I hope all of you are doing well and don't think I"m too pathetic for admitting all of this in my first blog post back in however many months. It won't be a habit, promise!!
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