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BLESSEDBEING's Recent Blog Entries

Day of Renewal plan

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

I'm just the messenger this time. When I was talking recently to my dear friend on Maui, she mentioned being on an odd mailing list for contractors in Hawai'i. Through it she was introduced to Alice Inoue who founded Happiness U, an educational and self-help center in Honolulu.

Today she sent me an article by Alice on planning a Day of Renewal. After a little hunting on Google, I found a link right to the article (and the newsletter Hawaii Renovation):

I love the ideas and wanted to share them with you all, as well as Alice's "school." I checked the King County Library System, but they don't have any of Alice's books. I've recommended they purchase a couple titles. Happiness U only has 2 courses available online (if you live near Honolulu, they have lots of great offerings!) at least at present; I expect to try the Life Purpose one soon. Here's the general website if you want to check them out:

I figure we can all use more Happiness in our lives! Wishing you well.

Blessed Be, Amanda

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

-WISPY- 8/20/2014 5:59PM

    Hi, I have not posted a blog for a long while either, and here we are today both posting a blog about the suggestions of a friend.

Thanks Amanda.

Hugs Wispy

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GYPSYROSEANNE 8/20/2014 1:22PM

    That's awesome! And NOT overwhelming. I really like the suggestions. Thank you. emoticon

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WATREKKIE 8/20/2014 10:03AM

    Thanks, sweetie....I'll take a look....


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THELORELAI 8/20/2014 8:50AM

    Wow! Thanks for posting this article. I'm finding it very inspiring.

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TRIPLE_EMME 8/20/2014 7:39AM

    This day of renewal sounds awesome!

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Big Rocks and Pledge Thread

Saturday, April 05, 2014

Back in August 2011 I wrote a blog "Big Rocks":

In it, I recount the story* "A man leading a workshop on time management began with a demonstration. He had a glass cylinder into which he put several rocks, until they reached the top. He asked the class if the container were full. They agreed it was full.

He then poured several scoops of gravel into the container, where it settled around the rocks, until it reached the top. This time when he asked the class if the container was full, they were divided, and none were certain what the answer should be.

So he took a bag of sand, and poured some of that in until it reached the top. He then asked what the point of the exercise was, given the topic of the class. One eager participant suggested, "No matter how full your schedule is, you can always squeeze in a little more!"

The teacher smiled, and responded "No, quite the opposite. If you don't put the big rocks in first, they will never fit." The question for each person is: What are the Big Rocks in your life, and are you putting them into your schedule first?"

On my team the Babysteps Brigade, in our Challenge forum, we have a Pledge thread where we set intentions and make commitments. We don't post there as often as on the Success Report or SPED--Something Positive Every Day threads, but it can be quite powerful to share our plans within a supportive group, and then report back (if we choose) on how we've done.

So today I posted this on the BB Pledge thread:
I won't get to each of my "big rocks" daily, but I do pledge to take action on at least one each day, and hopefully more.

My Big Rocks:
--Career development
--Financial education & empowerment
--Physical fitness
--Emotional well-being and balance
--Nurturing environment (this includes organizing and de-cluttering)
--Spiritual practice

I followed up with a report on what I've accomplished so far in 3 areas today, and I plan to do more yet. I just felt moved to share with more of my Spark Friends this Big Rocks metaphor, and a method of reflecting on whether and how the actions we take each day are moving us toward our most important goals, and helping us heal or enhance different aspects of our lives in a balanced way.

Blessed Be, Amanda

* (I heard the story in a workshop I can no longer identify, but probably one given by Deborah Ham)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAULAAUTUMN 5/11/2014 4:53AM

    I love this I need to think about my Big Rocks thanks for posting this.

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ANNIEBOLEEN 4/7/2014 12:58PM

    Such a good reminder to get to those things that matter the most. Thanks for sharing this.

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WORLDSERIES11 4/6/2014 9:06PM

    I've always liked that story....thanks for the reminder!
emoticon emoticon

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JINLYNN 4/6/2014 12:47PM

    emoticon Its a good principal to keep in mind when setting goals!

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-STARRYEYED- 4/5/2014 7:15PM

    Thank you so much for sharing. (((hugs))))

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I will!

Friday, April 04, 2014

I will take babysteps today--I will, I will, I will!

Goddess, I want to make changes, make progress, move forward toward my goals! I want to feel free and powerful. I can't get there all at once, but I can take action TODAY! I can take *at least* one step--and maybe even more than one. Yes!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRAVELGO 4/7/2014 9:58AM

  One step leads to another if we'll just take that one step.

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AJDOVER1 4/5/2014 3:27PM


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WORLDSERIES11 4/4/2014 8:01PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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EBPOOKIE 4/4/2014 2:45PM


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JINLYNN 4/4/2014 12:37PM

    emoticon Good reminder to focus on what we can do. We can do one baby step!

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-STARRYEYED- 4/4/2014 11:37AM

    One day at a time! You can do it!!

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TRIPLE_EMME 4/4/2014 10:11AM

    You can do this!

I'm babysteppin' with you.

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WATREKKIE 4/4/2014 10:07AM

    Amen to THAT, sister!!! Thanks for the inspiration! emoticon

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TRAVELGO 4/4/2014 9:53AM

  Just for today we can take that step!!!

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Getting Free at work

Tuesday, January 07, 2014

This was my most recent status: Anger over a situation at work is motivating me to make plans to address my own situation as well as the larger issues. It's unsettling, but empowering. Trying NOT to stay stuck in anger or hurt.

The latter has been hard. As I was trying to do an Oprah/Chopra meditation on CD this morning, I started weeping, then began repeating the EFT tapping routine just to bring some emotional relief. I was journaling over my morning coffee (fully recognizing that my PTS has been triggered over issues about being taken advantage of at work) when I wrote this:

"I want to keep remembering and affirming that I deserve better. I deserve fair pay and treatment at work. I deserve an abundant salary for the value of my work. I deserve to be treated with respect and care. I deserve to be free of a toxic, dysfunctional environment."

Especially with that last statement, something shifted. I went on to journal "That feels good--it feels positive and freeing. I refuse to blame myself for what was or what I did not do before. This is NOW and I can take steps to Get Free in another area of my life."

Wish me well, please! Blessed Be, Amanda

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WATREKKIE 1/8/2014 9:52AM

    BEST of luck to you, sweetie!!! You know I'm your biggest fan. While the big sister in me wants to jump in and punch those poopers in the nose for not recognizing your value, my adult recognizes that you'll come out much, much stronger without my intervention. Know that I'm here for support emoticon , cheering on emoticon , and ideas emoticon . "All ya gotta do is call....."

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MRS_EVA_K 1/8/2014 6:34AM

    Best of luck Amanda. I hope that you find what you need very soon. (((Hugs))) starryeyed knows something about escaping toxic work situations. it's roller coaster of emotions. Be god to yourself.

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JINLYNN 1/8/2014 12:03AM

    emoticon And best wishes.

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A_NEW_JAN 1/7/2014 6:17PM

    Sending you emoticon & a shoulder to lean on if you need it emoticon

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ELLFIN3 1/7/2014 2:09PM

    Awesome!! Thoughts, Prayers and Energy headed Your way!!! And some WARM (((((HUGS)))))

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WORLDSERIES11 1/7/2014 1:37PM

    Sounds like we have a similar work environment, Amanda:(
Here's hoping that things change for the better really soon!
emoticon emoticon

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JEWELS571 1/7/2014 1:20PM


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KELTIK_HEART 1/7/2014 1:06PM

    I, too, wish you well in resolving this work situation to your satisfaction. I am in the same place and hate getting up every day to come here. I've chosen not to get all wound up about it anymore because I don't even care if they fire me (which is not even a remote possibility). In part, my weight loss journey is to give me strength and confidence so I CAN leave this place under my own steam and get into a better environment.

Stay strong, Woman!


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EBPOOKIE 1/7/2014 12:17PM

    Wishing you well my friend from the toxic work environment much love being send your way and lots of courage and strength to find what is best for you and your spiritual emoticon being.

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-STARRYEYED- 1/7/2014 11:14AM

    I wish you freedom from the situation. ((Hugs)) Toxic work environment is so draining. I truly hope you find a way to empower yourself and break the shackles of negativity in your work area. (((hugs)))

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TRIPLE_EMME 1/7/2014 10:51AM

    I wish you well, my friend.

Staying in a toxic / dysfunctional environment stresses the system and makes the soul weary. Stay positive and make room in your life to invite a better opportunity.

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Cast this violent word from your speech

Tuesday, December 03, 2013

According to Marshall Rosenberg, author of Nonviolent Communication, it has "enormous power to create shame and guilt" yet is so ingrained and commonly used, many of us can't imagine living without it. It is the word "should."

It is strongly judgmental, and suggests the person not doing what they "should" is somehow morally defective or bad--or lazy or stupid, or somehow branded by one or more negative characteristics. It also implies a lack of choice which leads to resistance, for humans crave freedom and choice, and abhor tyranny "even when it's internal tyranny in the form of a "should."

Though most of the book focuses on skills and attitudes that assist you in communicating more harmoniously and effectively with others, I was most struck by Chapter 9: Connecting Compassionately with Ourselves. I especially liked the point he makes on p. 132: "Our challenge then, when we are doing something that is not enriching life, is to evaluate ourselves moment by moment in a way that inspires change both (1) in the direction of where we would like to go, and (2) out of respect and compassion for ourselves, rather than out of self-hatred, guilt or shame."

When our actions or progress do not yet match our values or goals, there is no need to call ourselves names or condemn ourselves, for that does not inspire lasting and joyful change. It is much healthier and more helpful to contemplate what we "could" do (examining our many options) and what we most deeply desire (considering our truest motivation) than beating ourselves up over what we think we "should" be doing.

So who's up to the challenge of no longer "shoulding" on yourself?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

I_R_WORTH_IT 1/26/2014 9:09AM

    Wow, never thought of "should" being a 4 letter really does denote putting yourself under others expectations! Thank you for sharing!

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SERIOUSLIM 12/14/2013 9:16PM

    i like the way you/Rosenberg put it. It is so liberating and empowering.I will watch my words!

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TRIPLE_EMME 12/3/2013 10:36PM

    This is great... I need to stop using the word "should."

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JINLYNN 12/3/2013 10:25PM

    Interesting. emoticon

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A_NEW_JAN 12/3/2013 9:55PM


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WORLDSERIES11 12/3/2013 5:33PM

    Amanda, you always find the most interesting books/subjects to read!!
This makes so much sense, will have to give it a try:) Thanks for sharing.

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EBPOOKIE 12/3/2013 4:08PM

    I am up for your challenge I see where this can be so damaging to one spirit! Thank you the post!

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