BJWHITTS   5,373
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BJWHITTS's Recent Blog Entries

Moving Forward

Thursday, May 09, 2013

These past couple of years have been up and down, on and off, sideways and upside down!

My heart is still desiring to lose weight and be more healthy. I have gained a lot of my weight back...again...which discourages me quite a bit. But, I'm refusing to give much energy to anything negative and instead will count it all as a part of my journey to health.

I am now a grandmother which is filling my life with great joy! It's also inspiring me to take all those years of "training" I've gotten through the trials of my journey, and put them into practice once and for all.

I want to lose weight because I know it would be better for my body. My joints, heart, and overall energy. But I also want to lose weight because I want to play with my grandchildren! I want to be known by them as a strong, energetic, and really fun Nana who loves being with them and always has an adventure up her sleeve!

Right now, I can't do those things at the level I want.

So, I'm paying attention again. I don't need to research anything, or create a new plan, or figure anything out. I already have all the answers...and now I feel I've got a reason. Let's see how the journey goes now.

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www.brendashealthjourney.com

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIVINGLOVINLIFE 5/9/2013 6:53PM

    You have sound goals and great motivation. Best luck in your journey to a new healthier you. Hugs Pat

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ROSCOEKR 5/9/2013 6:49PM

    emoticon Start slowly but start.

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My New Normal

Monday, August 16, 2010

I quit. I'm so tired.

Tired of focusing on dieting, then failing, then trying to get on track again.

Tired of trying to find the energy to "pump myself up" for exercise.

Tired of WAITING until I get "there" to live my life and embrace the person I want to be. Like being thin will somehow change WHO I am.

I am a PRO at researching things to DEATH! I have acquired so much head knowledge, you'd think I'd be the fittest most healthy woman on the planet! Not so however. I get the information, I apply it for a while, then because I can't stick with it "perfectly", I get discouraged. Then I have to find the strength and motivation to pull myself back up again, dust myself off and push forward. Which I do remarkably well...until the next thing that comes along to knock me off track. I'm so tired of starting over...and over...and over....and over!!! Ahhhh!

Exhausting.

It dawned on me last night that maybe I should just stop TRYING to diet, TRYING to lose weight, TRYING to be athletic, TRYING to not comfort myself with food, and instead just BE.

BE the me I see in the future.
DO the things I plan to do when I'm "there".
LIVE the way I want to live...as if I'm already "there"
SEE myself as the person I think I'll be "then".
TAKE CARE of myself.
EAT well and MOVE my body because it's so good for me and makes me feel so good! Because I WANT to, not just to lose weight.

I'm choosing today to see my life in a new way...and live it in MY "New Normal"! No more fighting this "thing" that haunts me incessantly...

1. I don't diet. I eat healthy and enough to get and keep my body at a healthy weight. No more figuring things out...I already know.

2. I am not afraid of my emotional eating at night because I KNOW I am tired and want to comfort myself. I have a great plan in place for my evenings. I don't comfort myself with food, but instead with peaceful things like a gentle stroll with my dog, a nice warm bath, soothing my body with lotions, curling up with my hubby for a movie or a show, going to bed early, reading a good book, etc...

3. I don't push myself too hard; but just enough. My fitness is going to improve over time if I just do it step by step. I don't push because I know that I will have more setbacks if I do. I have a strategic plan in place for each month so I know where I'm heading. I do fitness that I ENJOY and I do well at it.

4. I don't have to "pump myself up" because I'm not starting and stopping something. I am just living my new lifestyle. No more of that.

5. I live beautiful NOW. WHO I am is beautiful...not my size. I take time for my appearance and health.

6. I am who I am. I do things I enjoy. I am choosing to stop living in bondage whether it be to food or to dieting...I am going to live in freedom.


I guess it boils down to my motto for 2010...JUST DO IT and for today, I have peace in that.


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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMILES4383 9/25/2010 5:14PM

    Living is so much more important than planning or trying !!

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ROBKIM1 9/13/2010 3:48PM

    I really like your new way of thinking. It reallly makes a lot of sense.

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FREES1 8/16/2010 10:51AM

    Enjoy your new normal!!!! And remember nothing in this life of ours is perfect - so no need to try!!! Just be the best you can
Faye

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My Heart is full of Thanks

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Wow, I am overwhelmed. When I wrote my last blog, I was venting and feeling really crappy and even though I hoped to hear from someone, I wasn't really expecting such wonderful and caring advice.

Sparkfriends have said THE things I really needed to hear...how does that happen? :O)

I feel renewed and refocused after taking some time today to...REMEMBER! Remember where I've been, the many, many hurdles I've overcome and the growth I've experienced...why in the world would I want to leave that behind!? I DON'T!!!

Thank You so much to all who encouraged me so much. My heart is leaping with joy tonight and I'm ready for the next leg of this race.

Love,
Brenda

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HICALGAL 6/5/2010 9:47AM

    i'm sorry i'm late in replying but i'm glad to see you had great support. sometimes that loving nudge in the right direction and the confirmation of all our accomplishments is all it takes to get us back on track. keep on girlfriend...you know you're worth it!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PATTISWIMMER 6/4/2010 1:24AM

    emoticon emoticon

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RESIPSA99 6/3/2010 11:50PM

    emoticon emoticon
Glad today is better - you've done great things so far!

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MAGA99 6/3/2010 11:31PM

    emoticon

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I need help and support

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

I'm not a blogger...it's on my to do list, but never finds it's way to the top. However, I am blogging today because I'm struggling. How can it be that after being on such an even path for so long, old habits show up again? I don't get it.

I'm scared because over the past year, when I'd slip up, I'd get right back on track. Now they are becoming bigger slips and lasting longer and longer each time. I do NOT want to end up where I was, but my resolve is waivering and my strength to continue is sliding away.

Reaching out for help and support has never been my strong suit, but I'm getting better at it.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BJWHITTS 6/3/2010 2:35PM

    You guys are the best. Thank You so much for your encouragement and all the great ideas!!! You are right!!!, I can't let all the work I've done disappear and I need to look back and remember! Remember where I've come from and how much I've overcome. Why is it so easy to forget?

I'm going to shake things up a bit. Tonight I'm starting a new class called Body Dynamics...Combination of yoga (never done that before), circuit training, strength & conditioning, kickboxing drills, relaxation and meditation. I think it's just what I need right now. And seeing my trainer is running the class, I feel really good about it.

I love you all and your comments to me, really blessed my heart. To know people really care and then to spur me on is just more than I could have imagined.

Thanks soooo much!

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HEATHHILL 6/2/2010 10:04PM

    By just reaching out and knowing that you need help and support, you are taking a great step toward getting back on track. We are here to let you know that you CAN do it. You are worth the effort to take care of yourself. I KNOW you can get on track again!!

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SEAQUILTER 6/2/2010 6:09PM

    You are certainly getting the support you wanted. I too have been struggling. For me I am changing my exercise from swimming to doing more strength training and especially some core work. Change your exercise routine may help you. You will be able to get over this hurdle... JUST DON'T GIVE UP !!
We are all beside you. emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/2/2010 6:10:28 PM

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RESIPSA99 6/2/2010 5:09PM

    You can do it - reaching out clearly shows your inner chatterer that you mean business and you are not going to slip back to where you were.

I hear and empathize with you - I have been struggling as well and it is definitely not easy. I'm trying not to beat myself up to much and remember the 80/20 rule instead of letting a 20 slip make the ratio into 20/80.

I've made a commitment to another spark friend to earnestly and truthfully track my food and exercise for the month of June, no matter what I eat. Care to join in the (informal and no pressure) challenge?

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CALGALFOX 6/2/2010 4:11PM

    Try something new, try something different. Change your resolve. Join a new team and be really active on it. Join a challenge and go gung ho. Try a different style diet. Do something wild like go to a hypnotist.

You've been doing this a long time and you've come far. Get together with a group of friends and celebrate how far you've come.

Let me know if there's anything I can do for you!

Carol

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NLJONES66 6/2/2010 2:17PM

    You are absolutely beautiful and have come some far. Remember those things that gave you motivation the first time. Remember the reason you decided to make this long hard journey. You did a remarkable job and are obviously a very strong person. Hang in there! I know you can....believe in yourself. Let us know how we can help.


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SASSYCHRIS 6/2/2010 1:27PM

    Okay BJ,

It's time to get back on track. DO NOT LET all your hard work go down the drain. Do you remember WHY YOU ARE HERE, and WHAT GOT YOU HERE? If the picture is blurry, go back and read over your year's worth of posting, your success and your good feelings at this success. You are strong and can get through this temporary block. I have faith in YOU.

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It's My Call

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Wow. What a week. After having an amazing week prior to this one, this past week was in my mind...a disaster. After a very busy weekend which included some careless eating, I just wasn't able to regain my composure and found myself bingeing at the end of every day this week.

It's my nature to analyze. I can research things to death!...let alone overthink everything. I am realizing though that although doing that can be beneficial at times, it can also be a way for me to escape and justify my actions. What was causing this behavior? Was I too tired? Did I overexercise the week before? Maybe I didn't eat enough that week. Was it the type of food I ate which started the binge cycle?

And yes, I'm sure to some degree, these things MAY have played a role in my "success" or lack thereof this week.

This is the point. It doesn't matter what the reason is...WHAT DO I WANT? It's up to me.

Do I WANT to live my life in this state of confusion and turmoil?...to go back to the lifestyle I had of pain, exhaustion and depression just because I CHOOSE to use food for the wrong reason? Do I enjoy "pleasing" myself with food so much, that I'm willing to die?...to give up all that I've gained?

My husband can't make this decision for me. My family can't...even my trainer can't do this for me. At the end of the day...at the end of this journey...it will be ME who decides whether I cross the finish line. No one else can do it for me.

So this "unsuccessful" week has brought me to this fork in the road. Do I go down the path that I've always known of diet-lose weight-binge-gain weight-; Or do I CHOOSE the higher path of eating for health, enjoying new challenging adventures, denying myself of eating for the wrong reasons and instead actually experiencing life with it's ups and downs?

After a lifetime of hiding behind my weight problem and trying to live my life to please everyone else and even DIETING because it's the "right thing to do", it's time I stop playing around and do this for the RIGHT reason.

The right reason? This is what "I" want! I want health. I want strength. I want to live! Am I willing now to let nothing stand in the way of that?

JUST DO IT.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HICALGAL 2/28/2010 2:51AM

    U ROCK!!! KEEP ON...SPARK ON!!! JUST DO IT!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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