Monday, October 12, 2009
When I was twelve I had the weirdest horseback riding experience. I was riding Smokey, a relatively short, dirty white colored, barrel bodied little draft type horse whose back was nearly as wide as he was tall along the old rail road grade by my house that ran along side Seven-mile Creek. It was a beautiful summer day and Smokey and I were just riding along very relaxed when he started to fidget, and just kept fidgeting and getting more and more riled up and pretty much started prancing and side stepping as we went down the trail. I'm twelve remember and NOT that experienced a rider, so I keep pushing Smokey on down the trail. His ears go WAY back and he snorts and bucks a bit, as much as a 10year old retired logging horse has in him to buck that is as we come around the bend in the trail nose to nose with Mama Bear and her baby!!!!
Now, I'm scared. Smokey's scared and most likely too are Mama and Baby Bears! Well, Smokey freaked and bolted back toward the barn and me being freaked too just let him. Big mistake!!! Not getting away mind you but just letting him go and holding on for dear life as that little old bugger put his head down and galloped, I swear galloped for the first time and only time in all the time I ever rode him! The kicker comes when Smokey in his panic seems to have forgotten me on his back and bails between two tress that left him with four inches or so to clear each side of them. Even then my legs were thicker than that and BOTH knees slam into the trunks of both tress at the same time, dislocating my knees.
It hurt enough for me to know to stay on him when we got to the barn. He'd slowed enough by then but he and I both were gasping for breath, him from exertion and me from pain and panic. I'd managed to stay on his back, thankfully I was riding bare back and only ended up grabbing a handful of mane and laying flat on my belly the second half of the mad dash to the barn. I collected the two pieces of bailing twine tied to his halter I'd been using as a makeshift bridle and headed the half a mile back to my house on the main road NOT the trail with Mama and Baby Bear mind you.
My lets gave out from under me when I dismounted and my Mom knew something again was wrong with me. Let's just say my horseback riding career was filled with sprains, strains, bruises and now two dislocated knees! My Mom had me lead Smokey along the car by holding the bailing twine in one hand out the car window as we left for the emergency room. We stopped and she put him in the corral fence on the way by.
Every now and again, I do something that makes my knee "pop out" and dislocate again. The right one anyhow, which the Dr. said took the brunt of my and Smokey's bodies combined with our momentum against the trees.
Yesterday, it was a bar stool at work that caught me off guard. I had my butt planted on it and my right foot hooked around the rung on the stool and tried to scoot myself over to make room for all the stuff I was trying to gather at the buddy bar while waiting to finish closing out my shift. I knew as soon as I heard the sound it made, even before the white hot and nauseating pain came that I'd done it again. Of all the silly places to hurt yourself! Anyhow, I took a cocktail of nsaids, (Aleeve and Motrin) and acetaminophen as soon as I got home and iced it while settling myself on the couch with a pillow under my knee for support and resigned myself to not going to workout or yoga. I was still trying not to vomit every time I moved which meant it was still out. When the pills kicked in enough for me to bear it I asked Rob to give it a quick yank to put it all the way back. Reluctantly, and disclaiming any vomit clean up that may result he did. It was in fact still not seated properly and popped again making me almost scream and nearly pass out again waves and waves of nausea hit me but at least it was back in. I spent the night with pills, tv and an ice pack while Rob was at work.
This morning it's bruised and swollen some till and very sore but holding in place. I took more pills this morning and set myself out to see what I could do of my workout in a chair and of my yoga workout, I stuck to pranayama, shavasana and other breathing and relaxation techniques again in a chair or on the floor, no Sun Salutations for me today or standing poses or really anything that involves bending and pressure on my knee.
It was both a disappointing work out and a hopeful one. I couldn't do what I usually do but did maintain my scheduled time to work out. I've so been away from here much lately. I've been doing o.k. I guess but I miss it. I feel anxious about my healhty efforts without the crutch of tracking and indulgance of my ocd tendancies to keep everything pinned down. Don't get me wrong, I MUST admit that I've still done well, my weigh in's have been AMAZING 11 pounds last week, which is weird but hey, I'll take what I can get. Now I'm just steeling myself for a night of hobbling around at work because I so can't afford to miss work. I hate to have to take pills to function. That reminds me so of my everyday life before I started eating right and exercising. I took pills by the handfuls for every little ache and pain until it became prescription pills to handle my growing aches and pains of being morbidly obese. I suppose 128 pounds gone now I should just still my chaotic mind with the soothing balm of realization that so what I have to pop some pills to get through my two more days at work? It's NOTHING EVEN CLOSE to when I had to do that EVERY DAY several times a day just to get through each shift at work. I remember trying to be all chipper and happy and nice to people when I was in such pain!! My ankles swelling an inch or two over my socks and shoes and legs pounding knees aching, EVERY DAY!!! So, I may have to revisit these feelings for the next couple shifts, maybe even a week. It's not like it used to be. This is not my everyday reality anymore. But I still don't like it!! Hell, then I couldn't even have done what I did today of my regular workout in a chair with 5 pound weights and an extra heavy resistance band or concentrated for half an hour in corpse pose to relax that much. Poor Wooffitt though, it almost broke my heart to tell him no walk today. I do need to be able to save my hobbling about for work tonight. My poor neglected puppy!! He pouted and went back to bed with Rob. Anyhow, I think I'm gonna go soak my knee in some hot water. The recent hard freeze busting a pipe in our hot tub and all it's off to the bubble bath with me. Oh well, probably wouldn't have been able to drag myself into the hot tub with one good knee and all that anyhow. LOL Bathtub is much safer!