Wednesday, May 19, 2010
You must first understand that I love exercise. I really it. I love it most when it's just that - exercise - not sports. I really most sports unless I'm just watching. I love how exercise puts me in touch with my body. I love how I can feel a muscle growing stronger or stretching longer. I crave the pleasure of cool down as I come back from some special effort to a resting state, with a slightly different - slightly better - body. It's no surprise to me that I'm having such a good time with Yoga, but I even like calesthenics!
Why would I ever ever choose to not exercise? Who is doing the deciding here?
I think it is the Left Brain Lady with the Things To Do List. I think she's looking at a clock and saying "you needed more sleep so you got up late so you don't have time to exercise."
I'm positive about this because as soon as I had that thought my muscles began to contract and somewhere deep inside a whining tantrum began - I'm positive that whine is from my Right Brain Wild Child who cried "You never let me do anything! I'm never going to get to exercise again and the only thing left to do is have chocolate muffins for breakfast."
Okay - I made up that last bit. I don't even like chocolate muffins, but I see that, as the Left Brain tried to back pedal with offers of after work workouts, only ooops, I really ought to drive over to the city and visit my sick mama, so no probably have to skip the workout today, but it's only one day, my Right Brain had that bitter let down sensation that is only ever assuaged by Other Gooey Things To Eat that put on weight.
So there - you'd think it was the RB Wild Child who was full of sloth - after all that's the emotional side of the brain, but it's NOT slothful. It's deprived and resentful. It is the Left Brain Task Master who doesn't really think exercise is a priority and is always willing to strike that off her TTD List in lieu of Other More Important Things.
Well, Miss School Marm Left Brain - too bad. I'm on a mission to see that the Wild Child's healthy desires are always rewarded. Because I know that when she's thwarted - she can do a the kind of damage that takes miles of Things To Do Lists to undo.
And with that - I'm off to do my Powah Yogah routine.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Okay - you know all the benefits of exercise - increased strength, greater stamina, firmer body, smaller clothes. And the medical benefits might even mean getting off medicines or taking less which means more $ in your pocket. But it suddenly hit me yesterday, after completing a serious major spring house clean job - that because I am stronger and fitter and have more stamina - I can tackle these gargantuan life tasks - like whole house cleaning - and not need to spend the next 24 hours in bed recovering!
A whole house clean usually takes about 6 hours of up and down stairs and vacuuming and not just damp mopping but actually scrubbing that downstairs bathroom floor. It's getting the big step ladder out and cleaning off the ceilings and fan blades - which is more up and down climbing. (my ceilings are all 10 feet high) It's aiming the vacuum hose under the beds and under the dressers - which is a lot of on your knees effort. It's hauling 3 baskets of laundry from the upstairs washing machine to the downstairs clothes line then back up stairs to the bedrooms. It's up and down and lift and tote and really quite a workout. Normally this wipes me out about 2 or 3 o'clock and sometimes I'm not good for anything the next day either.
But steady efforts the past few months, with powah yogah added last week, have increased my strength and stamina to the point that when I got through yesterday ... I didn't need ibuprofen and a nap. Granted, I sat down and enjoyed a nice spate of knitting, but by choice, and there weren't any aching muscles.
I hadn't really thought about a fitter body actually giving me time - because most of the time I am having to battle with the "I'm too busy to exercise" arguments from my Bossy, Things-To-Do School Marm brain. This realization that being stronger gives me more time since I won't need to go lie down to recover from effort - Ha! I see this rebuttal defeating the I'm too busy argument every time.
I feel one notch closer to living that healthy fit life. woo woo. Still and all - May your house never get as dirty as mine does.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Wednesday, Mercury returned to a forward motion in the astrological skies, with the promise of one last kick in the pants for all things communicating, including technology things. I botched a piece of code for my library website (now corrected) I was unable to get a .jpg file of an important image we need. and I inadvertently deleted the email address associated with my personal blog - a diary I have kept since January of 2003.
I didn't know this till a friend contacted me with the information that my blog was no longer available, but as I read her email I saw each step I took to delete my precious blog in my memory ... each stupid uninformed thoughtless step. And I've contacted the google folk who own Blogger and who knows. there might be a way to fix it ... but I have deep serious doubts.
But my friends - as sorry as I am about this - somehow it just doesn't bleed that much. I thought it would. There are the many posts with photos about our trip to England, there is the detailed account of making a wedding dress from 10 yards of gorgeous 100% silk satin, there are bucolic reminiscences of strolls through the countryside with my husband and our dogs, which he christened "The Wheat Dolphins" once while watching them sproing above the swaying green heads, then disappear back beneath the waves of grass. There are birthdays and Holidays and family things - moments of sudden inspiration, a few posts that might be of literary value, and some stories that touched the hearts of others. This is a written account of the past 7 years of my life and there are no other copies of it.
I feel this loss. I am really sad about it. But I am not ... devastated. Not crushed. In some way I just see it as one of those moments of breaking. Have you ever had a special object - maybe a fine Waterford crystal vase or some a piece of Sevres china that hit the ground and shattered. That's how I feel. Completely aware of the loss - and completely aware of where it fits in the grand universe. As a thing. An event. A sadness. The flip side of a gift, creation, a joy.
I think it is my daily yoga that put me in the frame of mind to cope with such a loss. Daily Yoga, added to meditation and prayer, seems to be the physical part that was missing - the body part integrating with the spiritual. And for that, I am deeply grateful.
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