BESSHAILE   50,539
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Diets are like boyfriends

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Several years ago I took off a substantial amount of weight following WW. In typical modern American fashion I have put about half of it back on again and the resulting discomfort, sluggishness and unstylish shape have at last combined to get me up and doing something about the situation – At Last!

I run a public library. I probably have ALL the current and former popular diet books on my shelves. Some I bought because they were the hot titles. Some because people asked me to. Some I bought because I had faith in them. But all of them share one thing in common. Though they may feel like little miracles in hardback, they are just books. Each one is like a new boyfriend – full of promise, sleek looking, telling you how wonderful it will be if you just trust him. And like boyfriends, some w"ill prove to be faithful supporters and some will ... shall I say, "Not respect you in the morning.

In the beginning of October I flirted with some of those restrictive diets, reading the books and pondering if I could ever follow those plans. No fruit for 2 weeks? No red meat? No milk in your coffee? A little draconian here, me thinks. Yet although I'd had success with WW, this time around I needed - I craved - a little more structure. Alas, the diets that promised the most were way too restrictive and my old faithful was just too familiar. To continue the boyfriend analogy, WW was more like the boy next door. WW is like a husband, who tells you all the time that you are as beautiful as the day he met you (maybe decades and decades ago - lord love failing eyesight), that you're as slim as a breeze (cyclone breeze, maybe) and that he likes you just the way you are. Nice. Wonderful, really, and exactly what a HUSBAND is supposed to say. But we are talking boyfriends here, so we are looking for something a little unfamiliar, something new, with a few surprises – but with true potential.

It took me till mid month to finally give SP a chance and it had just the right blend of "hey, you live in the real world" flexibility and "this is what you ought to try today" structure. One of the things that is a strain on a woman of a certain age, who has cooked somewhere around 14,000 dinners so far, is coming up with one more interesting meal. When everything I know how to cook seems as boring as death, the thought of What to Cook for Dinner is utterly depressing. That is when take home pizza or barbecue lures me over to the dark side. And that is where the SP meal plan steps up to the plate like a really great date with a brand new boyfriend. I can pull up the day's meals, see if they sound good, swap some dishes out for others that match whatever's in my kitchen already, and then dine in comfort knowing I'm within a nutritious and calorie controlled range – without all the chemicals of frozen diet meals! In short, the SP suggestions leave me confident that I'll still respect myself in the morning.

Better yet – if I print out the weekly meal plan and shopping list and follow the plan for a whole week, I find I'm actually saving money. Where I'm often tempted to pick up just a little treat, while shopping, with the SP list in my hand I can just fill in the kitchen gaps and get away.

Really good boyfriends, the trustworthy, interesting, kind hearted types, usually become permanent fixtures in your life. Really good boyfriends turn into husbands. I am thinking that a really good eating plan might just stick around and support me and compliment me in the same way.

I just gotta say it. Heart you SP. Heart you more and more!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 11/3/2009 10:55PM

    That's a very interesting way of looking at diets. I loved this! Make sure you return all those boyfriends to the library. I've heard the book fines are steep LOL!

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HARPERLADY 11/3/2009 12:46PM

    I agree with you there, I have been on WW,atkins, well you name it and then I get all hyped up go out and by food to accommodate the diet , I got sick of wasting money worring about points or whatever. emoticon

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WEDDWT 11/3/2009 10:42AM

    How blessed I am that my trustworthy, interesting, funny, smart, kind-hearted bf became my DH. How blessed I am that I met Sparkpeople where I learned to see food in a new way, making a commitment to better health. Recently had a 27yr wedding anniversary and a 7mo Sparkversary. Love my husband and


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JENNYLYNN45 11/3/2009 10:35AM

    Interesting analogy! I can relate. Some diets don't respect you in the morning,...they give you big promises..then they leave you empty... and waiting by the phone! And then nothing! And you're wondering..."Why did I waste my time?"
Mercy! I've read so many books...spent so much money!
The only thing that works is swapping bad habits for good ones. Teaching yourself to eat better, only buy what's good, and teaching yourself moderation.
I'm hooked on Spark!
I see a loooonng future together!


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NICOLEMARIE0304 11/3/2009 10:02AM

    Cute post! Hopefully this will turn out to be a long lasting & beautiful relationship :) Best of luck!

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Exercise as a class issue

Monday, November 02, 2009

So here I am on the first fresh Monday morning in November and the one thing I am thinking about is - my gym visit after work today. After work, a meeting with the CPA and the dr.'s office. That's right. Exercise has taken over my life. At least - it's creeping up there into first place and I am glad. Lots of other things have had their turn at Pride of Place in the Life-0-Bess. It's time my muscles, bones, and stamina got their turn.

Yup. I am SPARKED! emoticon

Exercise was deeply frowned upon by my darling, but misguided, mama. To her, sweat meant manual labor and she struggled too hard to get away from a childhood of that. Her values all clustered around intellectual and artistic activities and in our home nothing was spared when it came to art classes, music, or academic activities. But sports? Movement? Exercise - even dance - was just that nasty thing that made you sweaty - and we all know that sweaty means .... low class. Yes. For mama, sweat was a cultural and social marker that her girls were not going to sink to.

I myself don't care for sports, preferring to compete against myself and what I did yesterday than to win over another. But moving my body is truly something I love doing. It makes me happy. It makes me feel powerful. It makes me feel like I could soar above the clouds with just a single leap.

So why am I coming BACK to exercise?

Well, at least I am coming back and not staying away. I live the same life everybody else does. I have calm periods when life opens up and lets me do the things I want to do. I have stressful periods that suck up time and energy. I am always amazed that I drift away from exercise because I love it so and I love how it makes me feel but I am always amazed at how quickly you can get out of the routine, out of the habit of feeling great and into the habit of feeling slothful.

The past few years had added issues. I took a terrible fall some years ago and did some serious damage to my neck and shoulder. It took forever to get some sort of diagnosis from any of our local doctors but when I finally did, there had been enough healing that surgery seemed like overkill. The Good Doctor I have now says "let me know if it starts to bother you and we will take a different tack". I can see that one shoulder is lower than the other now, but the pain issues are gone and I believe (and so does the dr.) that stronger muscles everywhere else will support the weaker places. I may never need surgery.

OH la - is this too much information? hmmm.

Well. anyway - a month of almost daily activity - starting slowly and growing both longer and more intense every day, has suddenly kicked me back up into a an old familiar fitness level. Now my body is craving exercise. It hungers for the rush, the heat, the glow of sweat. Last week I got off the elliptical trainer and my thighs had that wonderful warm pulsing feeling that tells me they hit their maximum effort. Saturday I got in that full body strength training session and felt like I could fly home. And yesterday I pulled out my old friend - my soft step - a hard foam block for doing step routines, I put on my favorite Brazilian Foro CD and did an old step routine I learned back in the early '90's.

Today I am full of morning energy - granted I always have morning energy - but I know it'll stand by me all day long. And already I can feel my body sort of going back into place - not all fluffing out in soft rolls, but kind of packing back into my torso the way it's supposed to be.

Oh mama - you were soooo wrong about sweat. It's not a sign of low class - it's a sign of high health!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHANNONSTILLS 11/2/2009 7:21AM

  excellent post

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One month - time to assess

Sunday, November 01, 2009

On October 1 I decided it was Time To Change Things and I began looking around for ways to do so and make it fun.

The first thing I did was to eliminate sodas from my life. I was drinking a minimum of 1 22 oz bottle of diet soda a day. The worst part of it was - they didn't even TASTE good any more and still I'd scoop one up and glug it down. Sodas had to go and I went cold turkey on them. In their place I added water - glorious delicious wonderful water. I live where the tap water is delicious and even at work our municipal water is good. A minimum of 8 glasses a day has been marvelous switch and it showed up first in my face. 57 year old boomer skin (lots of sun time, no sun screen all throughout my teens) isn't the freshest dewiest skin around, but if it's well hydrated, it looks a LOT better.

The next thing I did was join Spark People. At first I lurked, but after a week or so I was jumping in with my own spark page, my own spark blog, some posts and questions on a few teams and even some spark friends. I love the nutrition tracker and I'm finding my way around the fitness tracker. I've mapped out some rewards for reaching mileposts on the weight loss journey. I even found a goal to strive for - maybe even two!

Third on my list of Things To Do to was to exercise daily. My husband walks 2 miles a day and if he has to miss a day, he just extends his 2 miles every day till he's caught up. I have joined him - though we don't always walk together, I like gyms (he hates them - shades of high school) and I also work in town, close to the gym. Plus - my boss will pay half my gym membership fee if I just go twice a week!! The benefit of this regular exercise is that I really do sleep better at night and have more energy throughout the day. I love feeling energized and active and like I can jump up and do something instead of wishing the world would go away and let me sit here with my knitting and my books.

Best of all, the scale is begining to move downward. There were some missteps at the begining of the month but after 4 weeks I've lost 2 lbs - which is half a pound a week and that is a healthy way to lose weight. Sure I'd prefer to see it move faster. I believe there will be weeks ahead when it does. But I have always claimed that Down is Down and should always be celebrated.

October has been a wonderful month for my health and I really look forward to November. Who knows where I shall be a month from now.

Happy November to you all, my spark friends.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAYHIKER 11/1/2009 9:57AM

    You're off to a good start, Bess! emoticon Your weight loss will probably pick up now that you are more familiar with the program and the process. The best advice I got was to WORK THROUGH the SparkStages. Hat tip to GrandmaSam for that.

Cindy emoticon

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MSLZZY 11/1/2009 8:40AM

    Down is down-very positive! WTG! Keep on walking. You're doing great!

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Counting the days - Day 11? Day 28? 2Day?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Funny about counting the days. The danger is you start living in the future - to that day when you will be somewhere you aren't right now – and I want to make sure that I count each day as the precious gift it is. That first week I needed all the little seat belts I could wrap around me as I began – yet again – to take control of things. I felt so naked, so new, so raw. I felt afraid that this would be another failed attempt at getting my body back. But I've moved into a different state of mind now. Now – I am having fun and, while I am still aiming at a goal, I'm less concerned about getting somewhere I am not and more happy with being where I am.

This happened to me once before – at least, this feeling of fear, or at least serious doubt about being able to rein in the out of control issues - bad food choices and slothful activity. 6 years ago I was 18 lbs heavier than I am now and had completely quit looking at myself in anything but my Skinny Mirror. I joined weight watchers and dropped 37 lbs and kept it off about a year or so. But then .... Ahhh. Life. It's SO easy to say “Life intervened” and in fact it did. My son got married and we put on the wedding, my husband had a heart attack, I had a stroke. My parents health failed suddenly and we had to put them in nursing homes, clean out their house and sell it – all this and more!

But. What did I think was going to happen – as the years rolled by? We would stay the same forever? We would get younger? Life would ... what ... be held in check? Goof! Life is intervening all the time – till you aren't alive any more. This IS life.

I wouldn't “count the days” if I were already thin and fit and in peak health. Oh – I might count the days till Christmas or count the days till that project was due at work, but those counting days are for making sure I stay on track. When it comes to living life, – and for sure, eating and exercise are part of living life - I want to savor them. So – if I “count” any more days on this journey to health, I believe I shall call them SavorDays, TastingDays, LusciousDays. VigorousDays. LivingDays!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 10/28/2009 10:28AM

    I like the sound of your days! Today is the day-not yesterday and not tomorrow!
Today is a gift and I will enjoy it to the fullest. Today I will have a SavorDay! Sounds like fun. emoticon

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Heart You SparkPeople - Restaurant Guide Has My Back

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Don't you love it when somebody does all the work for you? That's how I felt when I opened up my email this a.m. and found an email from SP with alink to their dining out guide?

I'm about to head off to a professional convention where I'll be staying in a hotel, eating at restaurants and getting next to no exercise - unless I remember to get up way early and take a brisk walk - something that is within the realm of possibility but which I have NEVER done before.

And here I can go, armed with caloric count info, clutched in my wee little hand. Thursday is my weigh in day and I'll do that before I leave but I'm planning on a little mini-goal for the following week - no weight gain in spite of 2 days of restaurant food and a friends retirement party.

so - Thank You Spark People! for having my (fat) back.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 10/27/2009 7:47AM

    There is so much good information on SP that it makes it much eaiser when you have to dine out! Check out the gym if the hotel has one. You might be surprised! Have a great convention!

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MVRANA 10/27/2009 7:33AM

    Good luck! Many hotels have their own gyms, so why not get up early and ride the stationary bike. I often bring reading material with me while I ride, I read.

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