Wednesday, February 23, 2011
I don't know what to write about.
I've started this blog post four times already, but everything has seemed too banal to even write down, much less subject anyone else to having to read. But, since I want my five points, I'll put down some random thoughts.
Sammy is sleeping in my husband's lap right now, on his back. He's very cute, with his little paws flopping down, and his little brown and orange sweater. I can't believe how great this dog is, and I can't believe he went unadopted so long. People missed out. I think the next time I get to choose a dog, I'll choose another blind, deaf one, but only if it's as cute and sweet as Little Sam-Sam.
Last night, I had my first voice lesson. She said I was good, better than most on their first lesson, and that I have a good tone and resonance. I do have a little bit of background from high school choir, church choir and voice lessons back then, but I haven't sung outside my shower or a karaoke bar in about a dozen years. I'm doing voice lessons just for me, just on a hobby basis, so I sound better in the shower.
I liked her a lot. She's my age and very cool. I went through a period where I was really sad, because my group of friends kind of drifted apart (okay, so it was broken asunder by a really stupid, selfish move of one of my friends, but the other way is nicer to say). I could see this girl being a friend. Maybe not as long as I have a business arrangement with her, but it would be really cool.
She asked me to think of some songs I might like to sing during the lesson. Today, I was thinking about "Let the Sunshine In" from "Hair." I also had been thinking "When the Lights Go Down in the City" by Journey or "Don't Let It End" by Styx or "They Bring Me to You" by Joshua Radin. I can get to all of them eventually, I'm sure. I'm going to keep her for awhile! Any other suggestions are most welcome!
I ate a Healthy Choice entree today, and it was really good! I love, love, love the Asian Potstickers, and every other one I tried could never measure up, but finally, we have a serious contender. It was the Portabella Parmesan Risotto one. Yum! I ate everything today as planned. Burnt Crockpot Oatmeal in the morning (maybe not totally as planned!), Triscuits and a Laughing Cow wedge for a snack, and my HC with string cheese and an apple for lunch. Dinner is so hard to plan, but I didn't overeat, and I did really well today on my eating.
Right now, we're watching the Bayern-Muenchen v. Internazionale Milan soccer game. Well, the boys are watching it. I'm looking up when something cool happens.
I also made it to the gym for 45 minutes. I got my 191 in! Actually, now it's 192! But I still need to go back to burn at least another 200 for the week. I'll do that on Friday.
I hope I didn't bore you too much! Love!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
For some reason, while I was sitting at Jackson Hewitt this afternoon, working on taxes, I really wanted jelly beans. So I went next door to the grocery store and got some. I didn't go out of control with them, probably ate 2 servings, and now I'm spent with them, so they'll go on the top shelf where I can't reach.
But it wasn't good. Between that and the sushi buffet for lunch, I'm already over my calories. I probably won't eat dinner or will eat something very small for dinner, like a little cup of soup or something. And I'm not way over, just 50 over at this point, but it's not good, not for day 4 of the challenge!
I'm feeling very tired this afternoon, too. Probably from all-you-can-eat sushi. At this point, I'm not planning to go to the gym, but enough motivation from reading y'all's blogs might get me there, and if not, I have a solid 4 hours before I can expect the exchange student home, so I can do some weights while I watch the telly.
Monday, February 21, 2011
When I was at the gym, riding my bike, reading my book, I got a call. It was my sister! We talked for a few minutes, and at one point, she asked where I was. That's when I realized that I could not possibly have been working out hard enough, because I didn't sound the least bit winded. This is my normal bike workout--I like to read while I'm working out. But in the future, I need to work much harder on the bike, even if it hurts my reading and comprehension. Probably I should stick to the elliptical, it's easier to get a workout while I read.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
I think I've said this in my main SparkPage: I've been "working on" quitting smoking for about seven years.
One of my more recent "work on"s was with a therapist. I wish I could say "addiction specialist," but not only did I really dislike the guy, it turned out when I looked him up on my insurance website, he was NOT an addiction specialist, even though he said he could help me (I called his practice because the director of the practice had addictions listed).
But I digress.
Anyway, while I was talking to the guy, he kept trying to convince me there was still something in smoking I liked or found cool to which I was clinging, which I am definitely NOT. I really, really dislike smoking, but I'm really, really addicted to it, and that's my problem.
But I think there is something in QUITTING smoking that I like. Maybe not quite, but that, after seven years of being in this weird limbo, that it's become a part of my identity. I'm not an ex-smoker, a former smoker, or even a real smoker anymore. I'm just a smoker who's trying to quit. And that's something with which I identify. And that's what's got to change.
So there's that.
Then, this week, something really awful and tragic happened to someone I really care about. I went to be with him, and he was really hung up on what had happened, and he was overcome with guilt. I sat with him, and I talked to him and tried to make him understand that we can't live in the past, even if it was just yesterday, that we can only look forward. Later, I heard from someone geographically closer that he was beginning to forgive himself.
After I left him, I realized that I need to understand that, too. What's past is past. I can't change the last seven years. I can only look forward, and I don't have to identify myself as anybody from before. I can shake it away and start right now. And that's what I will do.
Thank you, kiddo.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
So for 5% Challenge, we get a 10-point bonus for doing a blog that says the following:
Your expectations (3), goals (3), and your reasons for changing your life!
So, here I go. I had the pre-Challenge assignment, but it wasn't in this format, so I want to do it this way, too.
Expectations. This one's weird. Expectations for myself? Or the Challenge? Or my Team? I dunno. I'll do for myself. It's the one thing over which I have control:
1. NO SMOKING! No matter what. Not an option. Period.
2. Pull my weight on the team with regard to exercise. This week, it's 191 minutes.
3. Stay within my calorie range recommended by Spark.
1. Get two months smoke-free under my belt during the Challenge.
2. Lose 5% of my weight.
3. Build a consistent fitness program.
4. Learn to stay within my calorie range everyday.
Reasons for Changing My Life:
1. Living longer
2. Being cuter
3. Feeling better about myself
4. Moving forward and becoming someone who does new things and learns more
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