Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Today, I worked toward making Freddie's rockin' world go 'round.
Oh, my God.
I went on the biggest carbo-binge in history today. It started with my boss. He fed us today, in a general sense. He gave us bagels today, and before I knew what happened, I ate two. TWO!!! Smothered in cream cheese, of course.
Well, after that, as you can imagine, I was LETHARGIC. And full. And ready to skip lunch, since breakfast was 11:30, and was sooooo bad!
So during my lunch break, I went on a walk with my colleague so I could buy a diet soda. One of my other colleagues gave me cash to buy her salt and vinegar chips. My favorite, too.
I don't know why I did it, but I came back with two. And I ate the bajeezus out of my chips.
How did this happen? It was like I wasn't there while I ate both times. And I ATE. Boy, did I ever.
I wrote a blog a little while back about how frustrated I was with my weight loss progress. After I wrote it, I noticed other people writing the same genre of blog. Except that I noticed they were saying, "I don't get it. I only went over my calorie range once. I only went out drinking twice. I only skipped one workout." And I thought, "Of course you're not losing weight fast! How can you not see that?" Then, I went back and read my blog, and it had the same stuff!!! So I gotta be better, and not have this kind of stuff happen!
NO. I do gotta be better, but "not have this kind of stuff happen"? This kind of stuff doesn't happen. I DID this.
How to make it better? I feel like exercise won't be enough in this case, but I guess it's the only way. That and eating properly in the future. And I gotta eat something else now. Because I feel like CRAP, and it's because I ate CRAP. I have to eat some nutrition. Right? Or should I just try to sleep it off? I dunno. Who knows?
Friday, June 10, 2011
I LOVE CHEESE!!!
Not all cheese, some of those smelly, lumpy ones don't suit my fancy, but in general, I love cheese! I eat string cheese for my snacks at work, I smother bagels in cream cheese, I love grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner if I have the calorie allotment, my husband cooks me macaroni and cheese on birthdays and anniversaries. I could go on. Cheese and I have a well-known and long relationship. You may have seen us walking together arm-in-arm in a recent issue of OK! magazine.
Which is why I regret to announce that I have to give up cheese on Fridays.
Why would you do this to yourself, BeatleTot?
Because, gentle reader, I have to weigh-in on Saturdays, so I've decided that I need to shrivel myself as much as possible on Fridays. So I have to aim for very. low. sodium. And cheese has lots. Surprisingly lots.
The sodium thing in general is a problem, because I've long had a love affair with salt. It shows up everywhere I go. I can't blame it. I give it mixed signals, you know. I try to push it away, but then I run up to it on the soup aisle. I hold it lovingly as I pour it on my macaroni and cheese.
So, yes. Cheeseless Fridays. Also known as the Weekly Shrivel. See you tomorrow, cheese! Because for today, I gotta replace you with asparagus.
Monday, June 06, 2011
I started a cool new job. Part time. 6 hours a week. From home.
The problem is that the 6 hours are from 2am to 4am. And what I'm wondering is, if I normally need 7-8 hours of sleep a night, and now I have to break it into 2 periods, how much more sleep per night should I aim for? An extra half hour? An extra hour? An extra 90 minutes? More?
I tried the Google, but when I typed in "how to break up sleep," I got a bunch of results about post-breakup insomnia. So I dunno.
In other news, I'm having a hard time feeling up to working out so far this week. Today was just kind of a blah day. I had fun with the part time job (which is running 4-6 this week), but there are so many irritants at my day job! Pretty unique, huh? Ha ha. And I suppose my problem is that I tell myself that I can let all the stress out at the gym, but I don't feel like that actually happens. The workout doesn't change my frustration or make me feel better about it, so there's always a little disappointment. I guess it's not so bad, it's only Monday, but with the 5% Challenge weeks starting on Saturdays, that's practically half over!!! I'm off work tomorrow for an exceptionally cool reason, which I'll tell you about tomorrow, so I can and definitely should go to the gym tomorrow.
And in case you're wondering, it's not phone sex!
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Today, there was a knock at the door, and there was a packet lying there when my husband opened the door.
"Did you order something?" he asked.
"No," I said.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. Maybe it's from my boss, you know? My new job?"
"Me? I'm your boss."
"NO. My new boss."
Then I looked at the package. It was addressed to Brenda MyHusband'sLastName.
"Brenda MyHusband'sLastName?" I don't normally go by that. I did the Latin American thing with my name when we got married, so my name is Brenda MyLastName de MyHusband'sLastName, but I don't like that much, so I usually go by Brenda MyLastName. My new job would have used my full legal name. I don't know who would call me Brenda MyHusband'sLastName. I only use it alone when it's better to not be so findable, or if it behooves me to appear Hispanic.
So I opened the package to find out.
Inside was a book. "Carrots 'n' Cake." You may remember it as the DailySpark Giveaway from May 6. www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=win
I didn't know they didn't notify you, that you just got a bangin' surprise at your doorstep!
And...when I just went looking for that link, I saw that they post the winners' names on the blog post. There were 5 of us. I know one of the other winners! Geez, SparkPeople is a small place.
But I digress.
Monday, May 23, 2011
In the past, I focused on my weight, or my calories, and, judging by the fact that I've lost basically nothing in the last several years, that obviously wasn't right.
This time, it was going to be different. I decided that I was going to focus on following streaks. Then, it was going to work. Instead of rewarding weight loss, I was going to reward behavior.
But the last two weeks, I'm up. Really up. Like, just quit smoking up.
So what the hell?
Am I defeating the purpose by complaining about this? Does this blog mean I'm still focused on weight loss, so of course it's not going to work?
And what am I going to do?
I already decided that I have to go back to being a food racist. No more whites. But this is frustrating. When am I going to lose weight?
I read a blog today--I wish I remembered who'd written it--about not going through the motions. I guess they were like me, not losing weight on SP for YEARS. Then, they stopped going through the motions. Is that what I'm doing? And if so, I obviously don't know how to NOT do that, so how do I NOT do that? What's the difference between just going through the motions and not with regard to diet, exercise, motivation, and health?
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