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Dad is gone

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

I don't think it has quite hit me yet. He had a long fight with Parkinson's disease, but finally lost it last night. The pneumonia was too much for him.

There is so much to do for and with my mother.

Thanks for all your support.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TLG71567 10/4/2013 12:09AM

    I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that you have lots of supportive people around you. Sending you prayers and hugs. emoticon

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MSLZZY 9/21/2013 7:50AM

    So sorry for your loss. Hold his memory close in your heart! HUGS!

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WARMSPRINGDAY 9/12/2013 7:18PM

    So sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom in 2010. So grief runs close to the surface still and my heart goes out to those who have lost someone. I care.

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MISSG180 9/12/2013 5:17PM

    I am so very sorry. This is hard to live through. Wishing you peace of heart.

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LISAINMS 9/12/2013 3:58PM

    Very sorry for the loss of your dad. You and your family are in my prayers.
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JLDACQ 9/12/2013 3:27PM

    My deepest condolences on your loss. Like others have said, be gentle with yourselves, and let others around you help care for you. You will be very busy in the coming days, I suspect, so if someone offers to help, remember to let them help, because they want to help YOU during this difficult time.

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AMANDANCES 9/12/2013 9:15AM

    I am so sorry to hear this, and I'm sorry for your loss. If I could give you a big hug, I would. You are an amazing and beautiful person, and I'm sorry you have had to go through this. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Big hugs to you, dear. emoticon

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MAURIZIA 9/12/2013 7:19AM

    I am so sorry to read of your dad's passing. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mother during this time.

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MARALEYNI 9/11/2013 10:25PM

    Very sorry to hear of your loss; prayers for you and your family.
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MSLZZY 9/11/2013 10:18PM

    Praying for you in your time of grief. HUGS!

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SEAJESS 9/11/2013 6:51PM

    This is HUGE. You have my deepest condolences for your loss.

I lost my father a few months ago to lung cancer and I thought I was prepared. In reality, nothing prepares us for the actual experience, at least it didn't for me. I was surprised by the physicality of grief, the exhausting, the memory problems. I hope you and your mother have friends and family around you can care for you as if you are convalescents... because you are.

Please be very gentle with yourself in this difficult time. You and your family are in my prayers.

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YOYONOMORE1 9/11/2013 6:45PM

    Sorry for the loss of your dad, prayers for you and mom.

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GRAMMACATHY 9/11/2013 6:42PM

    Sending prayers and love to you and your family during this time of transition. May the warm memories comfort you.

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CRAFTSFAN1 9/11/2013 5:08PM

    I'm sorry for your loss. emoticon emoticon

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PICKIE98 9/11/2013 4:30PM

    Gentle hugs to you and your mom. emoticon

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BERTAS_JOURNEY 9/11/2013 4:14PM

    Sorry to hear about your loss. Thoughts and prayers coming your way. emoticon to you.

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ATHLETELORI 9/11/2013 3:15PM

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

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More updates on my dad in the hospital

Monday, September 09, 2013

My dad remains in critical but stable condition. Yesterday the doctor cleaned out a collapsed lung, but warned us first he might not survive the procedure. Dad's condition is not good. He's tough, but he is still running out of time.

Of course, we all thought 3 years ago that he wasn't going to survive the year. Anything can happen, so I will be ready for anything.

Thanks so much for all your support.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSG180 9/11/2013 8:20AM

    Definitely sending prayers for your dad. Even when you have more time than you thought you would, it's hard to see the end coming. Hugs for you.

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MSLZZY 9/9/2013 3:41PM

    Praying that your dad can battle back from this. HUGS!

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Just for Today, like there is no tomorrow

Saturday, September 07, 2013

Tomorrow was supposed to be a running day, and the last day of C25K for me. And then this morning I found out that Dad was on his way to the hospital, for all I knew for the last time. Which led to thinking about all the things that I was likely to have to do tomorrow. It was starting to look like there wasn't going to be a run for me tomorrow.

And then it hit me; this was it, the real test of my Just for Today principal. There really is no tomorrow. When tomorrow comes the world is totally different. You never know what is going to happen. So, even though my knees and my ankle were all threatening mutiny I threw on my jogging clothes, and headed out. 35 minutes later I had finished C25K!

So if tomorrow happens, I can start a new adventure.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 9/8/2013 9:04AM

    Hope the news on your dad is better than I think. So glad you decided to push through it and stay the course. HUGS!

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SWEETYOUNGTHING 9/8/2013 8:31AM

    Thank you for the very important reminder. I'll keep your Dad in my prayers.

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REBECCAMA 9/8/2013 8:21AM

  For me my wake up wasn't quite so dramatic. I had been wanting to write a novel. I had a story sort of in my head, more than one really. I kept saying I would do it when I retire. When I have more time. When I'm not working full-time and raising my daughter etc. then I'll have time for writing more.

Then I was told I was going blind.

Then a mother of one of my daughter's classmates died of cancer.

Then another mother, this one in my neighborhood, died of cancer.

I decided I couldn't wait anymore. What if the next mother to die of cancer is me? Then what?

So I've been writing more.

good luck with your goals, and I do hope your dad is on the mend.

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TLG71567 9/8/2013 1:29AM

    Sorry to hear about your dad, but I am glad that you decided to finish your goal. I hope things work out for you.

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MWWENSIN 9/7/2013 4:07PM

    You are right nothing is guaranteed in life . We all have 24 hours a day it is up to us to figure out how to fill them. You are a very positive person - sorry to hear about your Dad. Things will workout - they always do - but perhaps not in the way you expect. You learn alot from these moments and about yourself. Good luck and surround yourself with supportive people. You've got this.

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NJMATTICE 9/7/2013 10:32AM

    Great attitude! Thanks for sharing!
-Nancy
Positive Bloggers Team

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JACKIE15108 9/7/2013 3:15AM

    I hope your Dad is ok.
You're right, don't wait for tomorrow.

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LATTELEE 9/7/2013 2:02AM

  Ok

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Update on my dad in the hospital

Saturday, September 07, 2013

It was scary this time, and he's in critical care, but at least now we're pretty sure what happened. He was coughing up blood this morning. Dad has advanced Parkinson's, has been living with it for years. The doctor's pretty sure he has pneumonia. This is the first time he's had that, which is actually kind of unusual for a Parkinson's sufferer.

Dad is in stable condition. Mom is home for the night. I got my work done for the day. And a bonus is that my step-nephew got to help out at the hospital, since I called him as soon as I got to work. This could start to heal an old and rather ugly rift in the family.

How is it that when I feel the dumbest, and the worst about myself is when I seem to be doing exactly the perfect right thing?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REBECCAMA 9/9/2013 7:24AM

  Glad the docs figured it out. Hope your dad is on the mend soon.

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MSLZZY 9/8/2013 9:05AM

    It is always hard to do the right, perfect thing. Hang in there! HUGS!

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TLG71567 9/8/2013 1:32AM

    Sometimes it takes a tragedy or other difficult situation to heal a family rift. That is what happened in my family when my great niece died at 6 hours old. I hope your dad pulls through. Take care of yourself. emoticon

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TLG71567 9/8/2013 1:32AM

    Sometimes it takes a tragedy or other difficult situation to heal a family rift. That is what happened in my family when my great niece died at 6 hours old. I hope your dad pulls through. Take care of yourself. emoticon

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WEARINGTHIN 9/7/2013 4:44AM

    Glad to hear your dad is stable. Good luck to you and him. Glenn

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At work and Dad's in the hospital

Friday, September 06, 2013

What is wrong with me? I went to the hospital, saw that Mom was a wreck, and that Dad is doped up, and I gave him a hug, and left Mom with the hospital minister.

Yes, I'm in shock. Dad could be dying this time, and here I am doing my job as usual, trying to figure out my next step. What do I do now? Mom isn't together, and doesn't want to bother any of us with their troubles. I did call my nephew, who called his parents. My other brother is on a hunting trip. My sister is on a remote island doing a concert, but it's a remote island in my half of the world, not her's.

I have power of attorney over their advance directives. I feel like I should be there, just in case. Is that ghoulish, or just my job?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MWWENSIN 9/7/2013 3:51PM

    Go by what you feel is right - not by what other people say. This is truly a tough decision. Use your support systems for help. This is truly a personal decision. Hope all goes well despite this for you and your family. This is coming from a dad who has not lost either parent yet but they are up in their years ie 84 and 82.

By the way nothing is wrong wlith you. You are doing your best in a very stressful situation.

Comment edited on: 9/7/2013 3:56:47 PM

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DIANE7786 9/6/2013 5:03PM

    emoticon I'm praying for your family. There's nothing wrong with you. You are doing your best by hugging your dad and leaving your mom with a minister who knows exactly what to do and say. The hospital should have copies of your dad's advanced directives. You won't use power of attorney until after his death. His doctors will tell your mom when his time is near. That may be much longer than you think. Visit as of ten as you can. I worked for a large corporation and watched many co-workers face this dilemma. It's awful when no one can ease your heartache. Take comfort in memories of good times with your dad.

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IFDEEVARUNS2 9/6/2013 4:32PM

    Consider your dad's wishes, and consider your own feelings. You won't please everyone. Do what you can, and be kind to yourself.

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JAMBABY0 9/6/2013 4:06PM

    I am not sure I am the right person to answer this but....When my mom got sick and everyone knew this was it, she wasn't going to get better this time, I didn't leave the hospital other then for my kids and even then I went right back. My little brother was in the military and opted not to come home (he could have he just chose not to), my older brother actually moved into her hospital room and refused to leave (yea he is a handful). Anyway there are little comments made by family and friends that my little brother should have been there and for a while I will admit I was mad at him HOWEVER when I thought about what my mom would have wanted him to do I can in all honesty say she would not have wanted him to be there she knew his position was high and he was very important and she was always very proud of him for his choices, and there wasn't anything that was going to change just because he was there or not, so ask yourself what would your dad want you to do? I hope this helps I will pray for you and your family

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