Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Just for today, I will forgive myself for not going out running yesterday, and for indulging in old favorite comfort foods. Success is not defined by what I did yesterday, or even 5 minutes ago; it's defined by what I do now. It isn't the past I can change.
Now I am enjoying the feeling of having eaten fruit for breakfast. Now I am wearing an outfit I would not have dared to wear last fall, and basking in the compliments.
Right now, today, I am grateful to be alive in whatever shape that life takes.
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Tonight I am going out with DS for the start of his 2nd week of W1 C25K. We are well into the rainy season, but so far today it's only been gray out, with no rain.
confession; last week my doctor increased my anti-depression meds. I had not been getting better after the mess in my upstairs bathroom. Am I going to have to get an increase in my meds now every time something goes wrong in my life? Because that doesn't work for me.
I've got an appointment with a psychologist (yet another one), to talk about setting and maintaining boundaries, and getting my life back. Or something like that.
Monday, August 19, 2013
Okay, so, I'm not blogging every day. I'm still on my streak. This weekend I managed to join DS for his W1D3 C25K run, and then the next day complete W9D1 by myself. I had to fight an urge to give up after the first 20 minutes, but I did go all the way to 30. It's no 5K, I'm a really slow runner, but it was a clear success.
Yesterday instead of cramming food in my mouth I attended a Mongolian Shamanic Tree Blessing, and spent the afternoon doing my nails...no, no more fake nails and glue, but they are a shimmery black, probably not age appropriate, but as they say, it's never too late to have a happy childhood.
My big NSV today; I could close my work jacket if I wanted. It fits over my stomach.
Friday, August 16, 2013
I get restless when I feel overly tired. I get something to eat, which wakes me up. I'm desperate to sleep, but I'm afraid to. Well, there really are reasons. The process of falling asleep is not a pleasant one for me. I have PLMD (Periodic Limb Movement Disorder), and normally when I start to drift off to sleep my whole body jerks, which feels like an electric shock running through my body.
I used to see a neurologist, who prescribed drugs for this, but then I started controlling it with iron pills. I don't think the iron is working anymore, but I don't know if I'm up to trying to find another neurologist to prescribe pills that I don't want to take anyway.
I knew I shouldn't try to blog after my bedtime. But it beats grabbing a fistfull of corn chips.
Oh, I almost forgot; SV today. Although my home scale is still telling me I've only lost 16 lb, my doctor's scale says I've lost 18 lb. YAY!
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Day 3 was busy at work, and I felt stressed beyond the issues of just having to deal with multitasking. I kind of like multitasking, to be honest, probably because my life has always been so chaotic it just feels normal. This in itself is an issue for another day and another post. I finally decided that the artificial nails were responsible for my mood. They were pretty to look at, but they were making me crazy. It occurred to me that the person who told me I would get used to them also wears 4 inch heels and has terrible back problems. 'Nuff said; I spent 2 hours Tuesday night in a frantic effort to take the d@#%$d things off. Otherwise I did not work out on
Tuesday. But I am free of the claws.
Day 4...Exhausted from my efforts with the fake fingernails on Tuesday, I called in sick and went to the movies with DS. I ate much too much popcorn, and then we went for a run in the afternoon. I am taking a vacation from my C25K program (on W9? Am I crazy?). He is a lot younger and a lot faster than I am, so even though I am essentially taking a break to start over at W1, I am getting one heck of a workout, and picking up speed. In all it was a good day, and although I got too much sodium, I would otherwise call it a success.
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