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Finding somethings out about myself

Sunday, January 16, 2011

It's always an eye-opener when you realize something new about yourself, and today I made one of those realizations. It occurred to me as I was driving home from a bridal show, that language and the way we speak to ourselves, makes a major difference between failure and success. Instead of saying "I can't", as in I can't find the time to exercise, or I can't stop eating in the evening, etc, saying "I can" finds me sticking to my plan and healthy habits. This past week showed me some of my old "Spark" coming back, going to the gym for an evening spin class--used to say "I can't" get myself out of the house in the evening...and I made a Saturday morning class when normally I would have given myself the weekend off...my focus and single-mindedness are returning. I'm feeling excited about getting to the gym again, I know I've had another weight loss this week and can't wait to get on the scale tomorrow.

I've always said I believed in the power of positive thinking and visualization, but somewhere along the line I stopped practicing those principals. It feels good to be getting back the control over both my thoughts, and actions!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TIME2BLOOM4ME 1/17/2011 3:51AM

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SHARBEAR100 1/17/2011 3:14AM

    I know what you mean. There's a huge difference between thinking you'll "try" to do something, and actually deciding to just do it. Keep up the good work! emoticon

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Definitely building some momentum!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

I have been avidly reading(re-reading in some cases) my SP daily e-mails and articles, remembering how helpful they can be....today one of those messages contained advice on keeping momentum going on your resolutions. One of the suggestions (one I already knew) was to just get dressed in your gym clothes. Today, I was feeling a little fatigued and decided to skip the gym (I wasn't going to have time for spin class since I had to babysit Jackson at 10:15) in the morning and go at 3:00 this afternoon. Normally, this would mean I wouldn't bother to go at all, since at 3:00 I'm usually in an afternoon slump...but when I got up I put on my workout clothes and at 3:00 kept my appointment. Proof that already being dressed for the activity pushed me to go...of course going is only part of it....another of the tips was to just promise yourself to take it easy-which I did--of course once there you will most likely go all out anyway....which is exactly what happened. I decided to do my own spin class, figuring I would go easy, and only for 30 minutes--well one full sweat and 45 minutes later, I hit weights and did my full workout in superset fashion...after completing my workout, and getting in the car, I realized I had spent 90 minutes working up a great sweat!

Food has been great all week long, as well, keeping the portions in check and staying within the calorie ranges....

It feels great, I can finally look myself in the mirror and feel good about myself, simply because I'm living up to my own expectations and no longer feeling like a fraud!

  


an ahha moment

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Went to the 6:00 spin class!!!! WhooHoo for me! Today I had an unexpected blip in my scheduled gym time--yet I didn't allow it to keep me from getting my cardio. I would have just skipped today after throwing my hands in the air and blaming circumstances for keeping me from doing what I must to achieve my goals. But as I learned previously, I'm capable of making a choice to keep living a healthy lifestyle, and I'm able to do that regardless of what occurs. I had an awesome spin class tonight, and even had an extra bonus of running into(and spinning next to) one of my favorite umpire friends!

I also spent quality time with my mother today who, btw, has had an amazing change since she met her new Great Grandson Jamison! God's newest little angel has somehow given his G.G. a reason to keep fighting! Everyday we have her here is a blessing and days like today, where she's "all" here, and not confused or highly medicated really are special....

  


UGGGHHHHHH!

Friday, January 07, 2011

Well I got it! Stinking stomach virus! Didn't make the gym today, or barely get out of bed...while I know it really was not possible, there is a part of me that is angry with myself a. for being so weak that I got sick, and b. that something already has derailed my new habits already! But, of course, that's my personality! I recently re-read one of my favorite sparkpeople's story and was reminded of a few things. She says this is about the journey, not the destination. I knew that, and believed that, but I think I let my own self-prophecy come true. I was living with the fear that I would gain the weight back, and while, I'm still down over 100 pounds, I have allowed myself to gain 31 pounds back over the past year. My sparkfriend Joanie, said she had to learn to love herself, and I thought I had, but it's amazing how quickly the self-loathing returns. Even at my thinnest I couldn't forgive myself, and was/am filled with regret for lost time. I kept saying I was living in the present and had stopped beating myself up, deep down I never did. there are plenty of things I could blame my current situation on, but the bottom line is I somehow decided I wasn't important enough. I allowed myself to get lost in the needs of my family. Recognizing and admitting this is a good first step, but I'm still not totally confident that I'm completely back...I won't know it for sure until I've hit the 3-6 week mark of sticking to my workouts. I feel very good about the food, proper serving size and limiting snacks--I was still eating healthy, just not in the proper servings...that's definitely part of the equation....I think today's missed workout is working on that confidence I had built--but it's still one day at a time, and hopefully tomorrow will find me recovered and if that's the case, I will be in the gym!

Just got this in a Healthy Reflections e-mail...seems perfect for me right now!

Shut out all of your past except that which will help you weather your tomorrows.

- William Osler, Canadian physician

  


Bugged

Thursday, January 06, 2011

So today is a cardio day....small blip...jackson's mommy and daddy have a stomach bug...went ore there to take care of J while mom went to her OB appointment...I'm feeling very yucky - hoping to go for a thirty minute walk/run in a few minutes....good thing is I don't feel much like eating...didn't visit mother today for fear of spreading germs....

Went for my run/walk it felt great to get out in the fresh air....glad I went because snow is in tomorrows forecast....still feeling funky hoping not to get worse....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AJOHNSON27261 1/6/2011 3:16PM

    Get well soon!

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HLTHYGAL 1/6/2011 3:13PM

    Well hopefully your feeling better soon.

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