BAMOM19   52,006
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Gratitude and regret.

Friday, May 08, 2009

First, let me thank all of you wonderful Spark People for setting me straight and being so supportive! I realize that my negativeness was of no use and certainly was unworthy of the time I spent on it. All of you made me see that quite clearly(some using my own words!) I'm so sorry to have put a black cloud out there when I know that there is nothing good to be gained from such a useless state of mind. Please accept my apology one and all, and take pride in the fact that you all called me on it!

Today, I feel a million times better, physically and mentally. I went to the gym this morning and though I was smart and didn't go to the spin class, I did my shoulder/arms workout and then added an additional shoulder workout when I was done. I lifted lighter amounts of weight, as I think I've been lifting heavy for too long of an extended time and can feel the havoc it's wreaking on my body (hands/wrists/shoulder) so for the next few weeks I've implemented a workout that uses high reps and low weight and also has different exercises that what I've been doing. It felt good to work out, though I missed the spinning. Hopefully, I'll feel better by Monday after having the weekend (actually 5 days) off. I do have two games today, and one Saturday, but I should be ok. I'm pain free today without having any Aleve in me.

Physical prowess is not always enough--some challenges require intangible moxie or the power of the mind.

Contrary to popular opinion, mental fortitude is not some magical, New Agey mumbo-jumbo. People who believe they are well equipped to overcome challenges actually perform better in demanding situation than those with less mental toughness, say psychologists at the City University of New York. But it takes practice. "The bain is like a muscle-if you want it to respond at its best, you have to exercise it," says Jason Selk, director of mental training for the St. Louis Cardinals baseball team and author of "10 Minute Toughness: The Mental-Training Program for Winning Before the Game Begins."

Some people think we need to motivate ourselves before we take action, but the opposite is also true--by acting we can motivate ourselves," says Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., author of "The Pursuit of Perfect: How to Stop Chasing Perfections and Start Living a Richer, Happier Life." "If you can force yourself to just get up and start moving, within minutes it'll get easier and your attitude will change."

Mundane workouts matter more when they're part of a bigger goal--so set one! "My aspirations are lofty, and I know that I need every workout in order to reach them," says marathoner Deena Kastor, 36, the women's marathon bronze medalist in the 2004 Olympics. "On days that I'm tired of training, I take one glance at my (list of) goals handing on the bathroom mirror and I sprint out the door."

All good reminder for my gloomy days...there's always a rainbow after the storm, we just can't always see it...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCAUDI 5/8/2009 11:23PM

    Great thoughts and reminders for those days when we are not so motivated. The key is always starting again.

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DREMARGRL 5/8/2009 2:34PM

    Yeahhhhh for you! I loved what you said,"Physical prowess is not always enough--some challenges require intangible moxie or the power of the mind. " I hope you don't mind if I use that one on my page. Right now, since I'm down with a compression fractured vertabrae and can't exercise, that sentence meant a lot. I do believe so much in the power of our brain. XXOO Mary Ann Dremargrl emoticon

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DEBBIEDAY 5/8/2009 12:53PM

    emoticon Glad you are getting over the 'hump' days.....LOL....Grabbed this statement because it IS so true in my case.....

"If you can force yourself to just get up and start moving, within minutes it'll get easier and your attitude will change." ..... I absolutely HATE 'getting started' but once I do its like ....ok-Let's Gooooo! LOL!!! Weird but true!


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CRYSTALPISTOL2 5/8/2009 12:21PM

    Glad you figured it out and glad you spark friends can remind you what you needed to do.

You can do this and succeed. It is a matter of mind over matter at times. Change the attitude and your thinking and you will succeed. emoticon

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What's the deal?

Thursday, May 07, 2009

I've spent the entire day (and most of last night) thinking this is something that will heal on it's own. I've waffled between thinking, "it's feeling better", to "why is it so painful? What is going on?" and finding reasons not to go to the doctor. I'm confused because Im not sure there's anything they can do for me. If I knew they could "treat" me and make it better without looking at surgery, I guess I would have already been there...along with that thought process, I'm freaking out--two days without cardio, I feel like a fraud, like I'm not an athlete, like everything is going to be hard and take so long to get back to where I was. I feel beaten like I've failed and that I'm giving in. I hate it!

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KVANATTA 5/8/2009 8:48AM

    You are SO not a fraud! You are an inspiration!

This is one of the valleys in between your mountaintops! Plug through so you can climb back up again :-) HUGS!

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DEBBIEDAY 5/7/2009 6:06PM

    emoticon Even 'Olympic level athletes deal with injuries, over-use symptoms or just plain need REST days at times! You would have NEVER gotten as far as you have being a 'fraud'....! Don't let this 'season' shake your faith in YOU or what you HAVE accomplished! ......So you have to rest the knees/ about some upper body workouts or even 'shadow boxing' get in some cardio....

This is not a stumbling block but simply a 'stepping stone' to explore new options!!!!

Hugs & Prayers,

P.S. A 'wise lady blogged on the 29th.... "Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do." emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/7/2009 6:08:01 PM

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Wednesday, May 06, 2009

two days of getting through the entire spin class, today I couldn't even get on the bike! I lifted my chest and back before and I had the knee brace on, but when I finished after going up the stairs and back down, I could barely stand on that leg, and still am having difficulty bearing weight on that my spin friend wisely told me to not push it, that I needed to be smart. So here I sit with ice on the knee hoping it will feel well enough for me to do my game(s) today.

Knowing I didn't get my cardio, I'm restricting my calorie intake in order to make up for the calories I didn't burn.

Look at a man in the midst of doubt and danger and you will learn in his hour of adversity what he really is.

- Lucretius, Roman philosopher

Do you really know what you're made of?

It's easy to stay true to our values when life is sunny. But because sometimes hope disappears, options run out, and bright days can turn dark, all you can really count on to be there is your own inner strength. These low points are chances to learn what you're capable of when you refuse to be knocked down for good. You may not be able to choose your hardships or options. But you do have the power to face what you're given with high character. Trust yourself and your instincts, and your best will come forward. Think about the last time you had the choice to fold under pressure or to rise to the occasion. How might you have handled it a little differently? If there's room for improvement, what actions would have made you more proud of yourself?

I'm trying hard not to fold, actually, I know I won't fold, because I know that I have the character to endure this bump in the road.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GLORYTOGLORY 5/7/2009 12:05PM

  Last year when I had a knee injury i did upper body like crazy to burn cals. hope you feel better soon. Very inspiring page!

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DEBBIEDAY 5/6/2009 8:32PM

    OUCH....Hope you are doing better!!!!!

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TRECECOOKS 5/6/2009 11:42AM

    I am so sorry to read of your injury. Do you think it is time to consult a doc? I hope you don't have to miss any games. . .

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Friday Finding and celebrating the joy in life

Friday, May 01, 2009

Well, today I was back at the gym. I did my back/bicep workout and then gave spin class a try. I made it for the first 40 minutes, but couldn't do any of the standing climbs and after 40 minutes even with the knee brace, I had to stop because it hurt too much. I did my game in the afternoon, even though it was raining. Tomorrow I have 3 games now, as my high school morning game got canceled. That of course all depends upon the weather co-operates.

We should consider every day lost in which we have not danced at least once.

- Nietzsche, philosopher

Finding and celebrating the joy in life

Each day is a new chance to find joy and to dance. If you let it pass or think it useless, the chance is gone and you'll never get it back. When was the last time you played? Or just did something for the sheer fun of it? Joy is not found in the world around you, it's within yourself. You can make your own joy, especially during those dark times when you need to really feel alive again. Fun and play are healthy antidotes to taking life--and ourselves--too seriously. They're proven boosters of immune systems and mental health and make life worth the trouble. So do the twist. Sing in the shower. Learn a magic trick. Watch a cartoon. Challenge some kids to a game. Don't let a single day go to waste.

Since I've wasted far too many days in the past, I plan to dance everyday and find a reason to smile and enjoy every moment.

Finding my way back to this point took too long and I don't plan to waste anymore time. I guess that's one reason it kills me so much to not be able to workout to my fullest. It feels like a missed opportunity and wasted time. But, if it means I can heal and get back to full speed sooner, than I'll learn to accept it.

It has taken a long time to reprogram myself to the point where I enjoy eating healthy and working out, but I know that I've done just that and therefore, I'm confident I'll continue to succeed.



Thursday, April 30, 2009

Well, missing two spin classes this week is really crummy. This morning I woke up and the swelling in the knee was so bd that I couldn't bend it past 45 degrees and even that was a struggle. Climbing the stairs and even getting in the shower was difficult. I'm icing it for the 3rd time today and hopefully the swelling will subside enough that I'll make it to spin tomorrow. Fridays is a lifting day and I have to do back and biceps so I'm going in either way. I have a game this afternoon and fortunately I have behind the plate and won't have to run too much, I'll definitely be wearing a brace on the knee. If I hadn't forgotten to put it on yesterday, I wouldn't be in this situation!!

Setbacks happen and finding a way to endure and not get off track are meant as a test and I'm able to pass those tests now. Perhaps I would have used this as an excuse to slip back into bad habits in the past, but now I know I'm stronger than that. One of my SP friends suggested that I might be fearful that skipping a session to rest the injury will send me back to my past sloth like ways, truth is I'm petrified that I might get too comfortable away from the gym and even afraid of losing my fitness level. I try to keep that fear deep inside and use it to motivate myself, but it's always there. I'm not sure there will ever be a day that I don't think about back-sliding and what the consequences of that would be, but in some ways that may be a good thing. If it keeps me climbing on the scale and eating healthy then that's a positive effect.

"The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them." George Bernard Shaw

ake a moment to look at the circumstances of your world. Is it what you want to see? What could you do differently to take one step closer to your ideal vision? Weíre all dealt different hands in life. Thatís how things are. To change things, you have to first accept that fact, then figure out where to go from here. We should all be able to count on each other for help, but in the end, we canít expect anyone to change our lives except ourselves. Nor should we want it that way. Itís easy to feel powerless and give up in the face of hardships. Complaining and blaming do nothing except prevent action. Without positive action, youíre giving up your power and asking for more of the same Ė a world you did not create. Where you start may not be your fault, but the course you run is still your choosing.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRAINER_T 4/30/2009 3:14PM

    You have great willpower so continue to use that. You will NOT slip back you are commited. I would take care of your body when it needs it though, because you want to have good workouts.
emoticonLift what you can and rest your knee.

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LWINTER 4/30/2009 2:27PM

    Wear the brace today! Glad you are figuring it all out. Was wondering about your lifting, good you can keep it up.

Bless the ice bag!

And you are so right about giving up your power to others! This is a lesson we can learn again & again, to take responsibility for our own actions.


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