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Blah Saturday

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Right now I'm sitting here looking out at a very gray and dreary day. I have already gone and run this morning in the bright sunshine and I was feeling very good about myself and life in general. But, alas, I've let outside matters dull my good spirits. First, I'm disappointed in my DH for disappearing for the day, without so much as a word...then it's my son for skipping family dinner tomorrow, and lastly my middle daughter has also informed me of her absence from the FD as well! So, that leaves me perturbed and annoyed and even a bit angry with my family (oh and there's also my brother-in-law and his failure to understand the status of the family farm and how to stop sinking money into a sinking shipas well as telling me about another family member's sabotage of my husband with his other brother) and feeling a bit sorry for myself. Then I read this: A lot in our past can be chalked up to inexperience, youth, and happenstance. But now, as an adult, you must claim your choices and their consequences as your own. Negative attitudes affect your life by creating cynicism, a pessimistic outlook, and often a lack of confidence. Take note of the ways you are escaping responsibility for your attitude. Do you continually blame situations, friends and family, or life in general for your poor mindset? The world has influence, without a doubt, but growing into a mature person means taking control of your emotions and attitude. Own them!

So, here's what I'm doing...forget them! Whatever they choose to do is fine with me. It's time I stopped feeling as if they control my happiness. I can have a life with or without their presences (sure I'd prefer them here, but...). It's time for me to make my own happiness and worry less about their's. After all, I've spent the last 29 years giving them all the things they needed and wanted in life...their happiness has always come first...

Sorry, I'm over all of that now. My DH came home and apologized and I'm accepting the fact that my "children" are grown-ups who have their own lives...still working on that though...

I, however, am more than capable of making myself happy and taking the responsibility for doing so. I've learned these lessons over the past two years, though I still need to be reminded from time to time. I found success this time, in part, because I finally owned up to what I'd done to myself, and realized that only I could undo all those wrongs. It's quite an empowering feeling actually, to stop finding people/things to blame for one's lot and instead taking the action needed to change them. We can't expect people to always live up to our expectations, once again, they are "our" expectations, not theirs, so we have to accept that and move forward. When I think of all the blessings I have in this life, it's rather silly of me to dwell on insignificant things such as those of today, and waste my precious time being the least bit unhappy!

So, I now sit here with a smile on my face, remembering how fabulous I felt out in the brisk, fresh air and cool, sunshine while I ran. It was glorious and I know that tomorrow will be an unfit day for outdoor activity, but I got my dose today and it will carry me through.

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TRECECOOKS 1/19/2008 7:56PM

    I am really uplifted by blog posts that indicate personal growth; yours do not disappoint. I hope that you and your husband have a nice FD, even if you are alone. After all, that was your first family, when you got married.
I'm glad you got a good run in this morning. It was a nice day, wasn't it?
Have a good weekend!

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Good week!

Friday, January 18, 2008

Well, today completes my week at the gym. I don't go on Sat or Sun, though I will either run or walk tomorrow in the park...and it was a great week. I did another 500 calories (80 minutes) worth of spinning today, and had another really good lift. I need to work in a few leg exercises for my inner thigh but, I've more or less eliminated most of the leg work as the spinning class really works the legs hard. I can feel it in my glutes, quads and outer thigh big time.

Basically, things are uneventful besides, though it was really nice today my husband said how great I's always nice to hear that...the extra hard work is paying off and it encourages me to work even harder...

My food was very good again today...and now I'm off to bed...I know it's only 8:44, but I'm tired as I set the alarm for 6:30 this morning and got up at 6:15!

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TRECECOOKS 1/18/2008 9:12PM

    Hope you get a great night's sleep. After a week of 4AM's, getting up at 7 tomorrow will feel like a luxury.
I've upped my walking, since I feel I can. I am thinking about the strength training for tomorrow. I suppose I ought to figure out what exercises the Curves machines mimic, so I can count the reps, and compare. I'll let you know.
Have a wonderful weekend!

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That makes me feel good

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Ok, today was the day I met with my spin friend from the gym and helped her start a weight training program. I had posted the other day how I was feeling apprehensive about doing this. The main reason was that I feel it's such a big responsibility. I know how badly people want to lose weight, I can see the emotions they feel (and remember how I felt myself) and I don't want to let them down, or lead them on. I just feel like so many people, industry, etc. are just exploiting all of us with weight issues. It's bad enough that there are businesses built from our anghst, but the fact that medical doctors are involved and pushing gastric bypass and the like as a solution, just shows how bad the situation has become. When I read ads or hear doctors extolling the value of gbp it makes me angry. Unless you are 500 pounds and totally homebound, there is no reason to have this risky proceedure. Let me qualify this comment(I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings and I'm sure there are some who have had this and found success): it's like the situation with doctors receiving "gifts" from drug companies for prescribing their drugs; doctors are no longer most concerned with our health, but instead with their bottom line. Gbp has become a thriving cash cow for the medical community and they have many convinced that it's their only hope of losing weight...BS!!

But, I digress, my session with my friend went very well, and I felt so very good when she thanked me when we were done. I could see how much it meant to have someone get her started in the right direction and that felt amazing. Being able to take what I've learned and give someone hope of duplicating my success makes my journey all the more meaningful.

I think she's going to be able to do this. I know it will take even more discipline from her than it took of me (she's got two young children to care for) but I think she is committed and just needed a little direction!

As for me I had an awesome day of working out and then came home and cleaned my house, did some laundry and other chores and now am sitting here catching up with SP business. Today was cardio and I made sure I burned my 500 calories during spinning(had to stay an extra 20 minutes)and I also did ab work while I waited for my friend to get to the gym. I feel as if I've accomplished a great deal today!

I'm really glad that this site is getting some media attention. It's so sad that people are spending their hard-earned money at WW or BLC to do all the same things that SP does. I know it was incredible for me to find this site, because I wasn't willing to pay someone my money to do something that I knew I was totally capable of doing for myself. This site, however, gave me the final pieces to this puzzle and I've been able to sustain my program with the help I get here!

It's cool because my son's girlfriend has no joined the SP program because she heard that's what I've been doing. She has a wedding she wants to shape up for and was going to go to WW but my son told her about what I've done, so she's now doing SP!

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TRECECOOKS 1/17/2008 7:07PM

    I hope that things will go well for your friend from the gym. It is hard, with little kids.
I agree with your anti-surgery rant. And I agree about the idea you had of knowing what to do, and being unwilling to pay someone else for it.
I am glad that your son's girlfriend has come to Spark. I hope that she will find it as life-changing as we do.

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SANDY000 1/17/2008 5:41PM

    good for you for helping a friend. It is a very scarry thing. A friend from work asked me to do the same for her. Then came over to my desk week after week with tears in her eyes cause she was not losing any weight. When I would ask "but are you losing inches" her response was always well I haven't started measureing yet. I would ask to sit down with her and go over her food and exercise log. Again her response would be "well I haven't started that yet. I finally had to get tough and tell her without the right tools it was hard to fix something She has started measureing and now come by week after week to say the inches are dropping so she does not even weigh herself anymore. "Big Sigh" but 1 step in the right direction is better then none. Good luck I hope you both stay on track and accomplish what you want.


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What did I do?

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Ok, here's the dilemma with getting fit...people want to know how you got that way. It's not enough to tell them, now I have two ladies who want me to show them! Two problems with this: 1. I don't want to show them something wrong, or that would cause them to hurt themselves. 2. I don't want anything to interfere with my own workouts.

Fortunately, they both seem to only workout on Tuesday & Thursday, so it's not on my lifting days. Unfortunately, I lift at least 3 times a week, and watch my nutrition daily, that gives them 2 strikes already if they want to look like me. But, I'll copy my workout and show them how to lift properly and see how that goes...

My workouts this week have been totally awesome! I've amped up (or kept up) the cardio to no less than 60 minutes and shooting for 500 calories burned. So I've been staying after spinning and finishing my ride until I reach that goal. My strength program has been switched up again, going back to free weights after a 2 week machine only workout. It really is amazing how tweaking the exercises you do can make you feel the difference. I really like that feeling!

I'm trying to add some more protein post-workouts in order to help my muscles repair themselves...that's a tough thing to do and keep the calories in check...

Dolly Parton has a song out called Better Get to Livin...while I'm not a big fan of hers, the song essentially says that people need to quit their whinning and moaning and make the changes that are necessary in order to make themselves happy; stop blaming others for your bad lot in life and change the bad things, because life's too short...then I come across today's Healthy Reflection and here's what I read: We all have goals--some immediate, some far off in the distance. By working hard and focusing on what you want to get out of life, you increase the probability of achieving all of your dreams. In the end there are no guarantees, so make the most of each day by celebrating and cherishing the moment instead of looking forward.

My point is that it's certainly a lesson we all need to learn and it's worth repeating no matter what format we in which we hear it!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CYD1057 1/16/2008 1:54PM

  I would definitely be cautious of people who do not want to pay for a personal trainer! You could beg off citing liability issues. Doesn't your gym have staff working the floor who are paid to show people how to use the equipment? I think they are required to have this for insurance purposes. These women can take books out of the library; there are loads of good ones, that will help them get on track. There are many videos and DVDs (they can go to and the Sparkpeople website to show proper form. It's flattering, but be careful with this one; it sounds like they could suck the lifeblood out of you! Maybe offer to workout for them. Then they wouldn't take up your time! (ha,ha) You could just tell them about the song and maybe they'll just "Better Get to Livin'"! After all, as you said so well, that is the real issue! Good luck with this one!!! I get really annoyed when people put me in the position of saying 'no' when they know they are using me!

Sounds like making shifts in your workouts in paying big dividends! Way to go! Do you work to fatigue when you do your weight work, or just short of it?
Ever do lactic acid training? If not, you might want to ask your softball players if their trainers had them doing any. I have recently stumbled across this style and shortly after found out that my swimmer has to do 'lactate sets', which is essentially the same thing. I am having trouble getting my own numbers right, but see where it might have potential.

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I love this life!

Monday, January 14, 2008

This Life is a gift.

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt, but I don't agonize over those things for long.
As I've lost weight, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.

I will dance with myself to the radio and sing along to any song, anywhere.
I am so blessed to have laughed enough laughs that they will be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed.
As you get thinner, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.

Many of us use our "limitations" as a stop sign for reaching our goals. While knowing our limits can safeguard us against injury and embarrassment, too often we use them as avoidance methods in our lives. What is holding us back from reaching our goals? How can we push beyond our comfort zone in a healthy way? Many dieters experience such limitations in on their weight loss journeys. Our bodies and minds are capable of overcoming much more than we could ever imagine if we just try. Today set new goals that may push you a little. Overcoming your personal hang ups and fears may be one of the most rewarding choices you'll ever make!

These are the thoughts that have helped me get back on track in a big way! I had a really awesome week with both food, and exercise and it gives me such a boost to know that even now, after 2 years I'm able to jolt my body back to losing weight. I dropped 3.6 pounds this past week. Yes, I know my tracker still says 150, and though it may seem like I'm lying or cheating, I refuse to change it, but instead vow to get back to, and beyond it. I had gradually crept up to 160 pounds over the past 3 months, but, I never gave up on my workouts, and now I'm back to tracking every morsel that goes in my mouth and making sure I know exactly how much of it I eat.

Here's to a better week this week.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRECECOOKS 1/15/2008 9:01AM

    You are right, as usual!! Congrats on the weight loss, and here's to continuing to Keep Moving Forward!!

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