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Thursday, October 31, 2013

So far, so good!!! I'm sticking with it and Saturday I will weigh again.

My mood is much much better now, partially because my inlaws are gone, partially because I'm taking Estroven with mood help, and partially because, well, I'm eating so so so so so much better. Who would have thought that a big dinner with dessert could not only make your butt bigger, but make you feel so down?

I am so grateful for the motivation, I love my SparkFriends! Thank you!

No giving up...and even though I'm going out on Thanksgiving with my hubby for a romantic stay at a beautiful hotel, I'm right back on my eating patterns the next day...I like feeling this way.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KOFFEENUT 11/3/2013 1:09AM

    Good for you!

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Here we go again!

Saturday, October 26, 2013 completed...groceries ordered. Now time for a healthy breakfast.

Still lots of stress, and unexpected bouts of grief over the loss of my dog--but I have to stop beating myself up over that. It's only been a month and it happened so fast that I never had time to adjust.

But the inlaws are GONE, thank heavens, and though I love them dearly, NO MORE VISITS until our house is finished and on the market.

New beginnings my husband tells me...we are going to have a new beginning. So here I am at the beginning--again.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KOFFEENUT 10/27/2013 12:07AM

    You two are going to have some AWESOME new beginnings!!!

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PRINCESS_SOFI 10/26/2013 4:50PM


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STRONGERLEANER 10/26/2013 4:21PM

    The important things is that you have started again.

Each day remind yourself of your reasons for your goal.

New beginnings can be beautiful!

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BOPPY_ 10/26/2013 2:31PM

    The best in your new home.

You will succeed. When issues arise, or problems with program, exercise!

A walk will do more good that fretting about anything.

You will succeed,

Lee emoticon

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BJPENNY70 10/26/2013 1:55PM

    First off, I am so sorry about the loss of you beloved dog. Sometimes it is good to start over with a clean slate. You write you own story. So this time you are starting off with a mind to be healthy. That is the best start you can give yourself. Once you sell the house and get settled in the new home the stress will come down. You need to take care of your stress now. emoticon Try taking relaxing walks. emoticon Watch something funny on the tv. emoticon Get hold of a good book you will enjoy and just sit and read for a few hours in the evening. Spend a date night with hubbie. emoticon Do something romantic and low key so you won't stress preparing for it. For example this year for our 43rd anniversary we did just that. Both of us had been under a lot of stress and grief also. So for our anniversary, we had supper at a nice restaurant and took in a movie "Gravity." I took our movie snacks so I could keep control of eating unhealthy. Hubbie was satisfied and so was I. Then we went for a comfortable walk in the crisp fall air. We had a very relaxing and enjoyable day together. Give it a try!

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Thursday, October 17, 2013

You can't know how much strength I received from the support of those who commented on my rant yesterday.

Today I've taken it step by step as I prepare for the return of dreaded monsters-in-law, but somehow it doesn't seem so fearful. You're all right that there's no point working myself up and taking out my energy on people who simply won't care. So my husband and I have a plan for me to be around them for just a few hours a day instead of the whole day and evening. It will be much easier, and on Tuesday they will be leaving--and finally back to my diet and my peace of mind.

Thank might not think your posts mean much to the people who receive them, but you really rocked my world, guys.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KOFFEENUT 10/18/2013 12:53PM

    Good for you! Hang on to your strong perspective - these folks are only in town a few days!

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I Can't...

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

I'm going to confess something here. I simply cannot be around my inlaws for more than a few hours without feeling like I need an anti-depressant. So I turn to food. I keep trying, I really do--and I planned an entire week of meals based on their nonstop complaining about my diet food, and their nonstop whining about what they will and won't eat...and the nonstop and persistent undercurrents of dissatisfaction that they are having to be careful in my newly renovated house because we are going to sell it soon and my mother-in-law has a tendency to fall, set things on fire, and scratch everything because she refuses to understand she is disabled and thinks she can do whatever she chooses in whoever's house she is currently residing within.

So they brought my husband 3 pounds (yes, that is 3 pounds in weight) of chocolate. And after a horrible 5 days, they are off to Vegas, and since I wasn't allowed to eat anything I needed to, I fell so far off the wagon, I simply cannot seem to get up. As they'll be back on Thursday, I realize this is stress, and I realize that I physically COULD eat just what I wanted and then cook something separate for them, but the practical, frugal side of me is just not able to buy two separate menus and spend hours only cooking things they like and then preparing my own meals.

So here I sit...4 pounds heavier. I know it's water from all the salt. But right now I'm a nervous wreck, partially in anticipation of being unable to say what I want for the next 5 days when they return tomorrow, and partially because I feel like...what's the use.

But they'll be gone Tuesday. I will carry on as best I can, trying to make better choices, but I know when they are gone, I will not let them beat me. I will begin again.

I hope anyway...too depressed to seriously even make a promise to myself at the moment.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KOFFEENUT 10/16/2013 5:20PM

    I've encountered folks in my life I call "bag of gold" people. These are folks you could hand a bag of gold, and they'd complain it was too heavy. Nothing you do is going to make this kind of person happy - they WILL find something to complain about. The only thing you can do is work on not getting sucked into it (I find myself saying "Hmm" and "Really" and "Interesting" a lot). And cook whatever you want, or let them do the cooking so they can have things just the way they like them. Hang in there - they will only be in town a few more days!

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FINCHFEEDER80 10/16/2013 4:09PM

    Ugh, my best friend has in-laws like that. None of us can stand being around them for any length of time. I completely understand how you feel. Just keep reminding yourself that at least they're not at your place to stay forever, and that there is the light of their visit ending at the end of the tunnel.

Maybe as a compromise, just eat smaller portions of whatever you are serving them, and then supliment your dinner with a salad? I do that a lot since my husband doesn't eat quite like I do, and I refuse to cook two seperate meals, or make him do the same.

Good luck to you, and don't let them drag you down!


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BAMAJAM 10/16/2013 2:32PM

  Sad to read that you are so upset by your in-laws! It is an awful feeling and will continue until you stand up for YOU. PICKIE98 has very wise words for you--- God has given you your mind, your thoughts, your opinions--and frankly, my dear, you count as much as anyone else! It will take a determined effort to "change course"--but you will feel empowered with each step of progress. Assertiveness (with all due respect to in-laws) is necessary. It is very stressful to be bullied and manipulated---I know.

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PICKIE98 10/16/2013 2:13PM

    I used to do the same thing with my mother and in laws, until i finally woke up one day and realized that God gave ME this day, this 24 hours, IF I made the choice to hand it over to them, I deserved it.

At that very moment I decided that their opinion did not matter to me, I owed them absolutely nothing, They have the same opinions I do, the merely choose to bully, embarrass and manipulate others to get what they want.
I owe them no explanations, no words..
I now live my life, MY life, NOT theirs.

Nobody can step on me unless I get down on the ground.

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Gained a pound...ack.

Sunday, October 06, 2013

I wish I could say that I had this wonderful loss, but I didn't. I decided rather than get too upset by it that I would do some trolling through the forums and see what other sparkers have done with their frustratingly slow was super helpful.

Gosh, your comments made me feel SO good. Thank you. I seem to be having one of those downer days where all I want to do is cry. I don't have ovaries and I've been through menopause, so I don't know where this is coming from--maybe it's watching the leaves and knowing it will be winter soon, but my little dog won't be there to have fun in the snow...or maybe I'm just overwhelmed with remodeling, inlaws and upcoming holidays.

But I haven't given myself leave to screw up what I've already started. And though I want to continue to weigh each Sunday, I am NOT going to worry about this number. Not today. I have better things to think about--like the wonderful southern pecan coffee my husband just brought upstairs for me...just because.

Now that's something...and I will do this and I will be all smiles for the two weeks my inlaws are here....and I will enjoy going out with them and make good choices at the restaurants.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STRONGERLEANER 10/6/2013 10:32PM

    Great attitude. Don't let one weigh-in discourage you. Sometimes our bodies will hold water, especially if we've eaten more sodium.

Know that you are making progress and the scale is only ONE tool.

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KOFFEENUT 10/6/2013 9:40PM

    Southern pecan coffee?!? I'll be right over!!!

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IVYLOVE5 10/6/2013 8:50PM

    Remember a lb gained is better than 5lbs gained so don't let the 1 lb get u down

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PRINCESS_SOFI 10/6/2013 8:20PM


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144AUTUMN 10/6/2013 7:23PM

  you can do it!!

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