Sunday, October 12, 2008
I have been thinking for a few weeks about how quickly the end of the year is approaching. This type of thoughts brings a lot of things and events to mind....mainly the holidays, my birthday, different sentimental times, etc.
But it also caused me to reflect on this year. It's not over although it's close. But I asked how I have done this year? Not judging myself or implying a grading system. But evaluating how good I have been to me.
See I started this year determined to make changes and accomplishments. I started this year with a renewed focus to prioritze me. Now the end of this year is quickly at hand and the question that must be answered is
"How good have you been to yourself?"
* Did you make YOU priority or did you keep your needs on the back burner as usual?
* Did you move to the forefront and stop being the shadow to everyone's light?
* Did you take the time to learn, enjoy, and love you?
These are tough but necessary questions.
Somewhere between the beginning of this year boggled up in the middle I learned a term called "journey". LOL!
This seemed like a wonderful way to describe my quest and a fantastic summary of what I had began my "JOURNEY".
Now that I am a year into my "journey" I am realizing something incredible.....this is no quest.....or some temporary attempt that I am embarking to and will return one day....nope this is permanent.
What I embarked on a year ago wasn't a journey, it is life. I am not trying to visit, return or go back.......in other words where I am going is permanent.
The word "journey" sounds fitting but it would suggest that it is temporary.....like a vacation or a quest such as a trip to the moon with a schedule to return back to earth. LOL!
If regaining my life and health requires a journey to the moon then I signed up for a one way trip.
I am a year into "ME" and whether you term it as a journey, a voyage, or just a lifestyle change....either way don't mistake it for anything other than life.
As flippant and non-challant as we are with life it is something so very precious and valuable. Our time is worth more than anything in this world and the time that we invest in ourselves making our lives more enjoyable and possibly longer is well worth the effort, energy, and sacrafice.
It may be a little early to answer those questions that I have but make no mistake time is passing and the time will come when I have to answer those questions and when it does I want to make sure that my answers are correct.
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Actually I have thought about this question for a while...and I finally answered it in a group that I am in......it felt so right that I am copying it in a blog.
Why do you support Barack Obama?
I must admit that when he spoke at the DNC in "1990 something" I knew that we hadn't heard the last of him. He was nothing short of incredible. So I occasionally would keep my ear out for that "black senator from Chicago".
Now here he is running for president!
I was amazed at his gumption. But reluctant to jump on his band wagon because America needs real change and vision. So I held my opinion and listened and listened some more.
Although he has a plan for America that I think is feasible and possible and a vision for America that I think is obtainable I was still reluctant. Being a black woman I didn't want to be the one to support Senator Obama simply because he is black.
But seeing Senator Barack Obama at the DNC on August 28, 2008 that historical Thursday delivering his acceptance speech made me realize something that I had missed before about this moment and this person.
I am a firm believer in destiny.
We are here for a purpose and to fulfill a destiny. No matter how insignificant one may seem to another each destiny builds on the other.
Seeing Senator Obama on stage and listening to the media reporting the historical significance to the day that Dr. King delivered his "I have a dream" speech caused me to realize that this moment was not only historical but this is a destiny being fulfilled.
I realize that Senator Obama is making tremendous strides that all African Americans should be joyous and proud but we have to look further.
That is what I did last Thursday. I looked further.
Senator Obama represents more than just Black Americans.....he represents America. He represents all Americans. In this window of time Senator Obama has brought us together with our history of a struggling and divided nation trying to find itself and right the wrongs that had occured in our past. In doing this Dr. King and many more lead a movement. In this movement were all Americans' Black, White, and Red. The enemy was ignorance, poverty, and injustice.
I thought about the Black people who were killed, churches blown up, houses and homes destroyed, and then I thought there were white people too. Remember the 3 Freedom riders? Only one of those 3 were black. The other 2 were white and they were murdered just the same.
Then my mind went back 2 generations ago when White parents had to overcome their fears and teach their children to not see the color of ones skin because injustice is wrong. I thought about the internal struggle that they had to overcome in teaching their children to be better people than they were by not passing their own fears and ignorance.
I think that they should be commended because as a parent I now know how difficult that can be.
So sitting there glued to my television like most Americans it hit me.....that is why I support Barack Obama!
Barack Obama doesn't represent just one sect of our population....he doesn't represent just white people, black people, red people, rich people, poor people.....he represents us all. He represents America and he has a plan for all America and a vision for a whole, well, and healed America.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Whew! Can you believe that Summer is just about over? Do you know what that means? That means that this year is about to end and soon it will be fall and Thanksgiving then Christmas and before long we will be celebrating another year. Time flies and life carries us along bouncing and tossing us over the hills, mountains, and by-ways.....it keeps rolling on. And it keeps changing......LOL! Nothing stays the same and believe it or not that is good. Change makes us resilient and strong. Causes us to question ourselves, reasses our direction, and reevaluate our priorities.
I was reading an email that a friend had sent about her reaching her "happy place" I thought wow! I need that....I need a "happy place". You know in the midst of all the requirements, responsibilities, and roles that you must do and fulfill surely there is a placed physical or mental that you can go and just not do or be but just exist. That has to be a "happy place". You know where you don't have to think about cooking dinner, football practice, or did Joe Blow clock in today on time or was he late again because you don't want to have to write him up--surely the "happy place" is a break, get-a-way, a mini-moment at least from all of this? Something like the old Calgon bath commercials----maybe that's it the "happy place" is the Calgon bath coming in and taking you away! LOL!
But I thought about this "happy place" I wondered how do you get there do you buy a ticket? How much does it cost? Who takes the money? Where do I board? and How long is the trip? LOL! I joke but I am very serious.....you wouldn't imagine some of my days not to mention some of the situations.
Well I am pondering on this "happy place" and I am so glad that my friend discovered it. I am so glad that she reached her place of paradise and she has vowed to visit often and I am clapping and celebrating for her. And although inside I wanted to scream Take me! Take me! I know that the journey to one's "happy place" is a self journey that only can be taken by you alone.
So I started to inventory, sort through, and organize because I wanted to find my "happy place" vehicle. Ok, so this "happy place" is a new concept for me so surely there has to be a vehicle to arrive at this spectacular place......my friend said for her it is Yoga.....so I began to sort through and decipher at what point or what action do I do that causes me to reach this mysterious "happy place".
Then suddenly it flooded my mind at once and actually consumed my entire being. I have learned to live in my "happy place" in the midst of my roles, responsibilities, and requirements I have learned that my "happy place" is inside of me. I carry it with me and I attempt to flow from my "happy place" at all times. I am not always successful but when I relax and allow the Peace of God to surpass my understanding and to consume my being I am not moved from my "happy place" at any point.
So when I am running around meeting deadlines, trying to be on time for meetings then when I am in meetings desperately trying to be interested.....Or when my role changes and I am Momma trying to listen and be attentive without shutting him down and being too controlling and still running around trying to make sure we are at school, practice, and Kumon tutoring on time---did I forget about making sure that I cook---oh and making sure that what I cook is nutritious and balanced--McDonalds or anything else is no longer acceptable-- and keeping a clean house, and managing and running a household. Then when my responsibilities shift yet another time and I am the eldest sister and/or child and I have to be the daughter and big sister that my family needs......then it shifts again and I am a friend who tries to be compassionate, honest, and open.....and then there is another shift and my role is a woman and I am experiencing dating and meeting new people that happens to be men...LOL!
But in all of this I have learned that my "happy place" is not a sedentary moment in time that I mentally, physically, or spiritually shut down or pull away---my "happy place" is in the midst of the whirlwind. When it seems like it's all floating by. I may drop a few things....I may get so busy with one role that I neglect another temporarily but I have learned to stay in my "happy place".
The bible says to be rooted and grounded in our faith....and my faith has become my happy place. It's because of my faith that I am able to keep myself as priority and love me because I see the price he paid for me and the love that he has for me that motivated him to pay the price that he paid. This alone is enough to keep one in their "happy place".
So I have learned that in the midst of the deadlines, responsibilities, and roles that I play in life......I can smile because I have learned to operate from my "happy place".
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
I am in my office and things are unusually quiet, thank God. I just read a piece that I wrote a few months ago titled "Look at You". I thought wow! that stills speaks to me and is still fits for today and I was going to put it in a blog, I still might, but my mind can't seem to get away from something that I read on someone's page last week. I can't remember whose page it was---it wasn't anyone on any of my teams ....it was a highlighted page and she was wonderful. She had lost weight and her title was about how she was on a quest to defeat obesity in her life. I read it and thought YEAH! Go Girl! Then I thought we are all on a quest to defeat any and everything that combats life. It just doesn't start or stop with obesity. My mind was then taken back to an assignment that I had when I was in bible school. I had to write a sermon. I was 20 something years old and thought I had life summed up. After hours, days, and weeks I felt that the Lord was leading me to the life of David. If you are familiar with King David in the bible and how he was called to be king it is an incredible story that I would encourage you to read. Well, the part of David's life that spoke to me was actually before he was the king. He was still a shepherd boy in charge of his Fathers sheep. His father had sent him to check on his older brothers who were part of Saul's (current King) army. Long story short, David went to check on his brothers and ended up winning the war for his country. But it was what David said that inspired me then and still inspires me today. "I have defeated the bear, and the lion, and who is this giant against the people of the living God of Isreal."
Wow! if you look at it in the eyes of the natural David was just a boy who was overlooking sheep. That isn't anything most would consider impressive. But in this unimpressive position David learned to depend on the power of God.
Think of it...up in the hills, back in the thick of the trees, in the parts where no one was looking ....he was defeating the lion and the bear that eventually equipped him to defeat the giant.
I remember that first sermon I wrote almost 20 years ago....and what is so wonderful is that all these years that first sermon...like the "Look at You" piece, still speaks to me today.
It would be wonderful to think that we can live our lives battle free. But we have to be honest......life can be a struggle, sometimes a great struggle, and sometimes greater than others...but still a struggle.
But I have learned it is what we do in the small times, the times when no one knows us, and we seem insignificant or unimportant that defines us. It's in those times that we learn something very important. We learn how to overcome, we learn how to get up, we learn how to dust ourselves off and remind ourselves that we are here to fulfill a destiny.
We may not feel like we are defeating a lion, or triumphing over a bear. But believe me we are! We are overcoming and regardless of how it feels or seems we are winning. It may be a few inches at a time, a pound at a time, or it might be learning the triggers that causes you to over eat or comfort eat. But we are defeating the lions and bears in our lives.
But more important than defeating the lion and the bear we have to know where our victory lies. We have to realize that it is not in our strength that we stand back up after we fall or in our own power that gives us the resiliancy to go on after we feel we have lost a battle. We must know and realize that this journey is not about becoming thin, beautiful, or sexy. This journey is about restoration, healing, and reversing the effects of what has tried to destroy us from reaching our destiny. So in our journey we have to realize that this is a quest to not only find our selves but know God.
Because each day that we defeat the lions and the bears and it seems insignificant or unimportant. Like those times when you don't feel that a 5 pound loss was good or you feel the scale is just not moving fast enough......be reassured that there will be a time that you will stand before a giant and announce to him that you have defeated lions and bears and the same God that gave you the victory will do like wise.
This victory is not only changing you but your family and your world. You are on your path to fulfilling your destiny.
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