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ASHLEIGHM89's Recent Blog Entries
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Friday, January 13, 2012
Well folks, today is my 1 year SP anniversary. It's been a mega year, lots of ups and downs, losses and gains; but at the end of the day the highlight of it all is that I've learned ALOT - about myself, about food, about exercise.
The sugary treats are still plaguing me, the temptation has been fierce today, but I managed to put the goodies back at the last minute and pick up some nuts and raisins instead (although they were covered in yogurt, but still - its a step in the right direction). I'm being heavily tempted, and that's harded, but I can feel my resolve get a little tiny bit stronger each time I say no and go for something healthier. I feel better, when I'm used to caving and feeling absolutely rubbish for the rest of the day - if not week, depending how badly I caved. It is my monster, and I will face it.
Feeling positive today, and am working hard at the things I love and want to make a career out of :) Things are looking good for Friday the 13th, it's not so bad afterall! Haha!
Thursday, January 12, 2012
But put them back and made a green tea and grabbed a cereal bar instead!! This is my biggest accomplishment yet. Not the daily workouts, not the smaller portions, but this. Anything sweet is my biggest pitfall, I still find it hard to say no when I have that voice nagging me saying "you know you shouldn't" - I ignore it and just tell myself I've been good and deserve it and/or I'll do an extra so-many minutes workout to make up for it. But not for months now have I had the success of putting down the junk food and choosing the healthy option. I forgot how darn good it feels!!
I'm sorry, I don't mean to brag and be full of it, I just honestly can't believe how far I'm coming. For many, the journey I've taken so far wouldn't be anything to celebrate, but for me as an individual, I'm overcoming my weaknesses and difficulties with my eating. I'm also getting more veg, and am conscious of nutritional content of my food instead of just eating whatever I feel like, whenever I feel like it.
I expected to see a loss on the scales after my hard efforts this week, but, alas, I saw a GAIN! Ugh. I haven't let it put me off though, I'm still doing the hour long workouts every day (cardio only up til now) and watching what I eat. I'm making more changes though, clearly something isn't working in the chain, so as of today I start tracking my food on the food tracker every day like I used to and I'm adding strength training to my workout regime. Last time I started using the SP nutrition tracker I realised very quickly were I was going wrong - what I thought was eating less was still infact too much! I'm so used to over-eating on a daily basis, when I cut down it feels like alot less. I usually track my calories as I go throughout the day, but forget to factor in fat etc. so can end up going over on that even when I'm lower on the calories. It's a balancing act, that's for sure!
One final note... TOMORROW IS MY 1 YEAR SP ANNIVERSARY!! I do wish I could have more to show for it on the scale, but that is my fault and mine alone, and I have learned alot so that is something worth celebrating :)
Monday, January 09, 2012
I can feel it, the pure satisfaction that comes from gaining control of your life once and for all and no longer letting food rule it. Food used to dictate everything for me - my mood, how I treated my friends and family, my self-esteem, self-respect - it set the tone for my entire day. And it was a rollercoaster of a day too. I'd eat something yummy but unhealthy and get so much enjoyment from it, I'd feel great; but as soon as it was finished and I felt sick and full, the guilt set in.
Food no longer has this hold over me. I still love it, and allow myself treats when I've earned them, and now moderate my treats as well as control my food portions for each meal. I've learned to say 'no' and have learned my limit for tasty treats before the guilt hits. I've also swapped alot of things - like regular tea for green tea, soda for water, and crisps for (only the nutritious kind) cereal bars. My body is thanking me for it! This is also giving me more energy somehow for exercise - possibly because I'm no longer feeling heavy and sluggish.
I just know I'll see a loss the next time I step on the scales (possibly tomorrow since it's been over a week!) - maybe just a pound, but that's a pound in the right direction :)
2012 you're treating me right!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Instead of doing the usual New Years tradition and making a list of things I want to do next year like lose weight etc etc (you know those ones EVERYONE seems to have on their list?), I’m taking this evening to look back on all that I have done this year. I graduated after 4 years of very hard work, which was a once in a lifetime experience and made for a very proud day all round. I started my SP journey in 2011, and while I only have a few lbs loss overall to show for it; for me it’s been more about the process, the forming of habits and a change in outlook and perspective, you know? That’s what has made a difference to me this year. And now, in 2012, with all I’ve learned from 2011, I can progress further and lose some real weight. Also this year, I found myself. I know how cliché that sounds, believe me; but it honestly is true. I was so lost before, I had no direction or purpose; but now I know exactly who I want to be and where I want to go with my life. And I know what steps I’m going to take to get there and make my dreams a reality. I’ve become a dreamer again, and this gives me such hope and joy, words cannot describe. And the funny thing is, it was discovering Spark People that started all of this. Hearing from such a wide variety of people, and seeing people achieve their dreams – not always just for their body – reminded me that somewhere along the line I had forgotten to dream. I had left all my hopes behind, and that’s why I always had this underlying feeling of being lost all the time. It took some time, but I’m now on the path I want to be, and for that I have Spark People to thank, and all you lovely Sparkers who take the time to share your own stories as well as support others in their journeys. Thank you Spark People, for being the stepping stone I needed to a better life, you have no idea how much I needed you.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Good news to report, spark friends, I have made progress!! I haven't weighed yet so nothing to report on that front, but despite eating too much on Christmas day and boxing day (who doesn't?) I gave bounced back stronger than ever, working out for an hour the past three days and at a fair intensity too. Better yet (for me personally), I have found some sense of control. I'm proud to say I've had a 'share' pack of milkybar buttons sitting beside my bed from Christmas that I have yet to finish! Normally I eat those packets in one sitting. Instead I've been having a tiny handful each day and leaving it at that. Ive also left all the delicious desserts we have leftover alone which is an absolute miracle since my sweet tooth is my downfall. Small steps to mankind, but to me, a giant leap. If I can conquer my portion control and my sweet tooth I've win the battle, for that IS my personal battle.
Hope everyone's had a lovely Christmas and is looking forward to a brand new year :) stand string guys and girlies - we can reach our goals if we do that! :D
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