Wednesday, October 30, 2013
I love Bikram yoga. I love being done with Bikram yoga. I love feeling strong while I am doing Bikram yoga. But I hate that I love it. I would much rather be anywhere else than in a 105 degree room exercising.
After a long absence, I finally made it back to yoga on Sunday afternoon. The first class was hard, I left defeated. At no other time did I realize just how far I set myself back having a 3 month vacation from my healthy lifestyle. Not only was I not at the same place I was when I stopped Bikram (in June!), but I couldn't make it through the class without sitting. I got nauseous, felt dizzy. I was truly a beginner again.
I went again last night and did much better. I didn't have to sit at all. I didn't get sick to my stomach. I was able to do all the poses in some fashion.
The thing I love about yoga, especially Bikram where you do the same routine each time, is that you really can see the incremental improvements every time you go in a way that you can't when you are running or strength training. One week, you struggle to grab your foot in a pose, the next week it is easier, the next week you are moving on to the next movement. There was one pose, standing bow, where I struggled to grab my foot from behind. I could only do it with an assist from the wall. I got to the place when I was going to Bikram regularly where I could do standing bow without the wall for assistance. That felt great. Now I am back at the wall. So even though I might look like the same bumbling fat girl in the yoga class to a casual observer, I know where I was, where I am now, where it is possible to go.
I was hoping to go Sunday/Tuesday/Thursday but since tomorrow is Halloween, maybe Friday instead.
Spark on, friends.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Yesterday was the first time in a while that I have been within my calorie goal. Though I have been tracking now for a couple of weeks, I have been over my calorie range daily, sometimes just 100 calories over, more often 400+ calories over. I was eating healthy stuff, just too much of it, so I wasn't stressing about it.
Anyway, happy to finally be within calorie goal. It was mainly because I had a late lunch and didn't snack in the afternoon. Dinner was a big meal, but light, lots of veggies and lentils. Overall a good day.
I made several new recipes yesterday: candied sweet potatoes and apples, daal (an indian lentil dish), and stewed apples with nuts. The stewed apples was a dessert and amazing, I am definitely going to make it for thanksgiving this year. It was sugar and flour free and still delicious. It was supposed to have grapes, but we added raisins instead. NomNomNom.
Sunday, October 27, 2013
I changed my goal in sparkpeople to be 199 by Jan 1. I did this without thinking about the time I have left to reach the goal. It is about 9 weeks to Jan 1, with three big trips and two big holidays. Perhaps trying to lose 17 lbs in 9 weeks is setting myself up for failure. I am not changing my goal, just realizing it might not be realizable.
The big trips:
1) I am going to spend 10 days in Japan in November. I have been to Japan many times for work and I struggle every time with food. I eat breakfast at the hotel, they have a western breakfast with eggs and toast. The rest of the meals are really hard. They eat a lot of shellfish, I don't. I find it hard to order at Japanese restaurants, even with pictures on the menu. I end up in convenience stores, buying random crap and eating it late at night in my hotel room. I need to have a plan for this trip.
2) In December, I will spend a week in San Francisco. I am really looking forward to this trip. San Francisco is a great place to visit, I will see a lot of friends, and have some time to do Christmas shopping. I do this trip each year and last year I found some great restaurants where I know I can get healthy food.
3) The day after Christmas, we always go to my husband's family in Florida. This is a trip I am really looking forward to as well. The last few trips we have rented our own house across the street from my inlaws. We are close enough to visit, but I have my own space, kitchen and food.
Are you guys making any goals to hit before the Jan 1?
Saturday, October 26, 2013
I feel strange even bringing this up. I am not trying to offend anyone.
I work. I have worked full time my entire adults life. I love my job and I went to school many years to have this job. I wouldn't give it up without a really good reason.
When I had kids, I really considered not working. We had difficulties conceiving. It took use over a year to get pregnant with my first child and 2.5 years to get pregnant with our second. (The third was a very happy surprise.) I took extended maternity leave with each child. I discovered when I was on maternity leave that I am not good staying at home. I need to go to work.
So now I work full time and have three kids and my life is crazy. I handle most of the doctor's appts and shopping and cooking and cleaning. I help my daughters with their homework and do most of the laundry. My husband helps, a lot, but I feel like I take most of the burden.
Now that I am focusing on getting healthier and fitness, I find myself overcome with jealousy for people who do not work. People who get to do their fitness while their kids are at school, during the day at their own pace, without concern for other people schedules or hunger or the need to have clean pajamas.
I am not proud of these feelings, and I realize there are probably a lot of negatives to being home all day. I think I would have a hard time snacking. I was just on furlough for 2 weeks and, though I did get a lot of cooking done, I didn't exercise once.
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