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Pet peeves

Thursday, November 18, 2010

People who say muscle weighs more than fat....muscle DOES NOT weigh more than fat. A pound of fat weighs the same as a pound of muscle. Brings up the old riddle: Which weighs more, a ton of lead or a ton of feathers?
Uh, they weigh the same. (a ton)
Now if you want to say muscle weighs more **per volume**, that I can go along with. Place a half gallon jar filled with fat and a half gallon jar filled with muscle, my guess is the jar with muscle would weigh more. (let's try it with a rump roast and marshmallows) Muscle is denser than fat. Again, refer to the lead vs feathers. Feathers are fluffy, lots of air. I imagine a ton of feathers takes up a bit more space than does a ton of lead (heavy and dense) Well, unless you use one of those suck-the-air-out-of-everything-bags. then it might be smaller volume wise.

....pickup truck drivers: Uh, if I can't see your headlights, YOU ARE TOO CLOSE!
oh, and the speed limit is the fastest you're supposed to go under optimum driving conditions. Pea soup fog not included in that. Neither is rain here in Texas. For the once every 10 years we get a dusting of snow, Texans please stay home. you DO NOT know how to drive in it. It's more slippery than rain. (Yeah, and it's usually the same pickup truck drivers who end up doing donuts on the Freeway)

...not being able to find what I need, be it in the rubber room, wally world or the supply closet at work. Right now my unmounted leaf stamps have eloped with a New York friend's die plate. I think they went to Niagara Falls. (Does Wichita Falls actually have a falls? Haven't found a spring here in Lytton Springs... don't know about Dripping Springs)

...when DH and kids are home and use up all the ice.

....popcorn at the movies with that fake butter melted all over it. Doesn't even taste like butter.
Think I've converted DH to unbuttered (yippeee)

...when my hands can't translate what my brain sees - craft/artistic wise. this happens more often than I'd like. really irritates the heck outta me. Sometimes though, it's out of my control (where DID those um stamps go?? I know they're in a 3 ring binder somewhere..My brain is not seeing the binder. It's black. Has 3 rings, plastic sheet protectors with hook and loop tape(HALOS system) holding the stamps in place. Cardstock in the sheet protector, stamped with each image.)
looks like I need to take a trip to Niagara Falls. It's a CONSPIRACY!!, I tell you. a conspiracy!

Guess I'll have to make Christmas cards instead...



Saturday, November 06, 2010

I have a member of my family (brother) who is "toxic", and have made the decision of no communication other than email. Of course, he comes up with "Well, I'm done with school so I don't have an email address anymore so it's OK for me to call you even though you've asked me not to" type excuses. (My reaction? you need to go to the public library and get a yahoo acct.)
His phone messages are ignored. I cannot deal with him one on one--I have to remain calm, and I can't do that if I'm hearing his voice. It's too stressful and emotional. I can't think through what and how I want to say things. Put in writing, I can respond in my own time and be able to think, and ACT with out Reacting

It is VERY HARD to live with a toxic person . YOU have an obligation to yourself (and by extension spouse and children) to protect yourself and them from things that harm.
Harm can be physical, emotional or mental. Yes, it's EVEN HARDER to make the decision to "cut them off" and they will try all sorts of mind games and guilt trips. They are manipulators who love to CAUSE CHAOS and WREAK HAVOC wherever they go. Have not ever gotten past the "me" stage in life and of course, think they never could have done anything wrong.
If you don't cut off the relationship, it will eat you from the inside. IT WILL KILL YOU one way or the other: heart problems, obesity, whatever. You have no obligation to be a whipping post for ANYONE, not even a parent.

Go live YOUR life, let the toxic person live his/hers

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REDDIRTRUNNER 11/6/2010 1:58PM

    Thank you for the reminder. Sometimes it's easy to forget about the toxicity someone spreads and want to see the good, but ultimately the toxic waste is outweighing everything else. THere's no such thing as "a little polluted".

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MOODY9 11/6/2010 1:29PM

    I have a toxic family. It's tough. One on one it is great. But you put everyone together and it is toxic like you wouldn't believe. I have resolved to love them from a distance. We live 300 miles apart.

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BIGBUCS 11/6/2010 1:23PM


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CHELLESDOINGR8 11/6/2010 1:22PM

    I agree!!!

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damn I'm pi$$ed

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

I am so upset right now I could spit nails, swallowing them back and spit 'em out again.
I guess we've all got our own PBH** to deal with in our lives. I'm not even going to ask WHY.
mine is a "brother" one who went into violence (beating on me), stealing from others/ taking anything he wanted to when ever he wanted , got into drugs and alcohol for a while. Wanted to be a big hit in the music business. has expected someone else to take care of him all his life. Someone would always bail him out. would hit up our 90+ year old grandma all the time. then our dad. any one he knew, didn't have to be a relative, but that was preferable cuz of "family obligations" made people feel guilty. A master of manipulation.
No contact for years, then when dad died, all of a sudden *I* am supposed to be the "soft touch". sigh. He was going to lose his condo because he stopped paying the association fees. Since his story was he was trying to fix it and sell it, my dear dear husband (the BEST in the world!!) and I sent him some $$ - Didn't make sense to lose his home, but also told him it was a ONE TIME gift and DO NOT contact us again for money.
matter of fact, he was told we did not want a relationship at all with him..he's that toxic.
In the 5 years since he keeps contacting me for "help" He got his degree, and is now in an occupational therapy school somewhere. good for him (really)
He emails me almost year ago.. with all sorts of questions and innuendos. I spent 9 hours answering and explaining things, and posing questions of my own..his response? "I've got finals, I can't respond right now" Never did get an answer. get more calls from him (I prefer to deal with him via email instead of on the phone because I can formulate what I want to say better- it's not as emotional) He's been asked numerous times not to call the house and to email me (let's face it: another reason is kids don't give messages well) last fall he tried the guilt rips (not a typo) again "Our cousin sends me care packages" "i don't think our dad would want me eating beans and rice" HUH?? sounds pretty healthy to me!. has totally bad mouthed me with aunts and cousins, but no one asks me for the other side of the story

OK, so I figure if I can hand out oranges to the beggars on the street corners, I can send him some food...via gift card. Ask him where he's a place called "Trader Joe's" . come to find out, TJ has no presence where I live. Nowhere in the state. TJ's does not sell ANYTHING by phone, internet or snail mail, not even gift cards.
I put out some effort (why, oh why???? such a glutton for punishment!) and find some one willing to go to TJs and pick up 3 gift cards (I figure I'll send one a month..don't trust him with cash). 3 months later I find someone else to do it. Now mind you, this involves a bit of effort, not just on myself but on someone else. I sent a check, they have to cash it, purchase the cards, send them back to me and then I send the GC to him. 1st one received, I get an email that says "I'm puzzled, but thanks" Not a word after that. (six months of free money/food.)
UNTIL a month goes by and he doesn't get one. I emailed him back, explained the situation and told him a walmart card was in the mail. His answer today? "thank you for thinking of me but I don't shop at walmart"

I am screaming inside!! I am cussing like the worst cusser you can think of (don't want to disparage sailors or marines here, but it's worse). You can't be very hungry (or "desperate" as he put it) if you are refusing a gift card to a place where you can purchase things to eat.
Gosh, when my kids were little and there was no money how much a gift card/certificate would have helped!!

Now that he expects the monthly stipend, it's no longer a gift given freely. "free food for you" oh, it's not at the restaurant I like so I don't want it" ??

ungrateful @#$%^&*()(_

I emailed him back and said "Oh I'm sorry- I was just trying to help. Send it back when you get it. not a problem"

and I know I "shouldn't" let it get to me, but it does. the camel's back is totally broken in 2.
there will be absolutely no more help. he can starve if he so chooses (and will do a great job of martyrdom while he's at it.)

This may all be a bit disjointed, and not nearly touching the tip of the ice berg of everything..but thanks for letting me blow.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARBBF 3/16/2010 3:27PM

    Well, at least you weren't as stupid as I was. Sibling called me crying saying she needed $$$$$$ right away until she could get to her market account funds the next month, and she would pay me back the total amount right away. Daughter asked if I'd gotten a promissory note..I told her no, but I would ask sibling to send me something confirming the loan. So...called sibling and was told "just write something out for me to sign, and I'll sign it right away and send it back to you". Did that...and nearly 2 weeks passed and I kept getting excuses about why the note was never signed and returned to me. Finally, after 2 weeks...I get this note in the mail...that sibling will pay me back $250.00 a month for the next TWO YEARS AND SIX MONTHS. This was the person I trusted, who had told me the money would be returned in full one month from the date of the original loan. So far...I have only gotten ONE check for $250.00. Too bad I didn't listen to Clark Howard until after the fact. When he talked about making loans to family and friends..46% of the loans are never paid back...versus 14% of loans made from banks or other financial organizations. I am writing this in hopes that no matter what sob story you get...just say there is nearly at 50% chance that you will never see your money again. Please, don't make the mistake that I did.

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READY2ROCK206 3/10/2010 11:04PM

    oh boy!! And lovely that he choses to shop at a specialty store like TJ's and not just a regular grocery store! Best of luck to you!

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Thursday, December 31, 2009 more ways than one

OK People- it's ***NOT*** a good idea to have someone slam into your knee with motorized anything. (happened Christmas Eve at work)
First visit to the clinic gave me a doc who didn't LISTEN to what I was saying, moved my leg said "it's OK" gave me a few restrictions for work. OBVIOUSLY he didn't want to be there and doing his job.
Went back to the clinic yesterday, actually had a doc who LISTENED to me and actually examined the knee. Got an xray. (1st doc shoulda done that!) Blessedly, no fractures. Still on restricted duties at work, only allowed to be walking/standing at work a total of 2 hours a day. no kneeling, bending stairs. I normally walk about 4 miles. Run up and down the stairs whenever possible. It takes me 4 times longer to get anywhere hobbling along

(OH and found out about the 1st doc: it was his last day of employment there, and he wanted to get to his son's birthday party.. OK, that's FINE, BUT DO YOUR JOB or TRADE DAYS with another doc. Nurses do it all the time, so do docs)

have a valuable "object lesson" here in just how important exercise IS-- got on the scale this morning and I've gained 5 pounds this week Knew I'd gained some..was feeling bloaty/heavier
Of course not ALL of it is due to non exercise..since I'm now in the office instead of running around ...they ALWAYS have food around!
Didn't think I've eaten that much, but (or should that be BUTT BUTT BUTT?) It's going to be at least 1 more week before I'm cleared to walk any more, and then possibly therapy before being totally cleared
(I've never worked in an office before, have always been clinical)
The BEST news is there hasn't been much pain (relatively speaking...if you place childbrith at an 8, pancreatitis at a 12, this is about a 3 on the pain scale, so that's GOOD!

gotta watch the intake more strictly

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GIRLTRUCKIN 12/31/2009 7:13AM

    you will be back to running around in no time....don't rush it and make the injury worse

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If **I**can do it, so can YOU!

Sunday, November 01, 2009

I am SO PROUD of my self!

last fall, (at the age of 50) this bookworm/couch potato/sit at the 'puter girl began doing walking/jogging intervals. Actually, I started walking, would jog for 30- 60 seconds. Slowly increased the jogging part, minute by minute. Super bowl Sunday this year (5-6 months after I started) I jogged 40 minutes non stop! emoticon
That night, my gall bladder decided it no longer wanted to live. I was in the hospital for most of the week. was about 8 weeks before I started feeling somewhat "normal" again. Then, March 31st, my life changed again. After years of working 3P to 11P, I started a new nursing job working days. Throughout April, May, June, July, August and September, I was dragging. (the Texas heat didn't help much there, either-I don't DO hot weather to begin with)) The change in shifts has wreaked havoc on my body. Carb cravings, tired all the time, just didn't want to do anything. Was all I could do to get through the day.
I've slowly been getting back into the jogging. Last week I jogged 38 minutes, non stop.

TODAY? I PASSED my previous time of 40 minutes

YUP..I jogged for ***45*** minutes today. Twice up my "Rocky Hill" (Rocky had the Philly steps, I've got my hill) Not up then down and back up, but up it, around the local cemetery and back up the hill.
Winded but not gasping for breath.

ME?? 51 years old?? the gal who would rather read or craft than do anything else?
JOGGED 45 minutes???


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTLYLE 11/1/2009 8:20AM

    Good for you, what an achievement. Through all the obstacle's you proved it could be done. Isn't Ole Sparkie Great!
Skeeter emoticon

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TESSA321 11/1/2009 1:49AM

    Arkcmom, your blog is encouragement! For years I've wanted to begin a regimen of jogging, and here you are you did it. You've achieved that level of committment that comes with running/jogging 45 minutes straight! How did you prepare, how did you go from couch potato to jogger?

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