Friday, April 30, 2010
Waiting for something can be very stressful. Being in a "state" of not knowing and waiting for answers to questions can make you feel overwhelmed with stress. Think of how often we wait for information to trickle down to us. It happens all the time. Often we just sit impassively and wait while others go about their business and get to us when they can. Waiting can be terrible!
Did you ever notice how relieved you feel when you get lab results back from the doctor? Why is that the case? I find waiting stressful because I project all kinds of possible scenarios taking place. I don't just do it with lab results, I do it in any situation where I don't have enough information to decide what to do. What if the results are bad? What if I don't get the job? What if my boss doesn't think I've done a good job? What if I can't lose the weight? What if other people make fun of me? What if I look stupid in front of others? I could go on and on but I think you get the idea.
Today, I was working on a long term situation/project (I've been working/stressing over it for about ten months now) and I found myself waiting once again for information (from a professional in the field). I felt myself starting to project a variety of scenarios that could take place. Suddenly I was once again playing the "what if" game, only this time I decided to take the bull by the horns. All it took was several emails and/or phone calls and I had enough information to put my mind at ease.(For now at least) I can't begin to describe how much better I felt once I had the information that I needed. I shared the information with hubby (who has been my partner in this project ) hoping that he too would share my relief. Well, he didn't. He acknowledged that our information was a start but is still wary of the amount of information we got. He is a person who requires even more information than I do!
The question of information got me to thinking. Why should I put myself on someone else's time schedule when it creates stress and frustration for me? Where is it written that I have to sit by passively and stress over a lack of information? I wonder why I do this? I know that there are situations where it takes time to get results or information, such as lab results. However, I've run into situations where the lab results were actually available the next day and nobody called me for two weeks. For years I've waited when I really didn't need to wait. Not just about lab results, but I've waited for all kinds of things.
Today, that stopped. Today, I decided that I was going to start asking questions. We are all entitled to ask questions. We don't have to be passive; to sit and wait until someone "gets to us" in their pile of work. I made the decision to become proactive instead of reactive. When I asked my questions today, I was very respectful and calm. I let them know how the waiting was making me feel. I said I was frustrated, edgy and anxious from waiting. Much to my surprise, I got an answer to every question! I also got the reassurance that I needed and I felt better. How often do other people do the same thing? I have come the the conclusion that sometimes knowledge and information can give you power and relieve stress. I am taking back the power that my passiveness has given to others. I am going to be proactive about my life! I am going to ask questions!