AQUAGIRL08   184,485
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AQUAGIRL08's Recent Blog Entries

Here it is, Wednesday already!

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I have to say that I've been doing well since I decided to re-dedicate myself to health and hold myself accountable for my exercise and what I put into my mouth. I feel very good about it and the time is going faster than I thought was possible. Here it is Wednesday already and I don't know where the time has gone. The key here is to keep as busy as possible, take snacks and water with you when you go out and try to have fun. This is my off day from intense workouts and I decided to use my time sorting and straightening out those piles of papers that I've dreaded dealing with. Now the trash can is full and my piles have been consolidated into three big envelopes. I paid bills and filed the records of the payments. I felt like I was really productive today too! I even took on the task of filling out and mailing in paperwork to the insurance company and getting all of my stuff ready to take to the neurosurgeon's office for my Monday appointment. Getting caught up on my chores, will leave me some wiggle room for this weekend. I look forward to the time when the little ghosts and goblins come a calling! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PEGGYANNSCH 10/30/2009 6:36PM

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WOLFSPIRITS 10/28/2009 7:20PM

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Stress Takes A Toll

Sunday, October 25, 2009

This past week has been a very stressful one for me. I have accepted the fact that there are many "stressors" that I can't control and this week was chock full of them. That said, I must admit that I didn't do my best job at controlling emotional eating. The stress and demands on my time caused me to feel exhausted and overwhelmed for a full seven days. I usually do a combination of walking and water aerobics. This week the water temperatures at the pool dipped too low and I was only able to do water aerobics once. When exercise is an outlet for stress, this made the stress even worse! My body felt sluggish and out of sorts. I did eat my fruits/veggies and drank my water every day but I was lax on portion control and did a poor job of monitoring my sodium intake. The sodium compounded with the extra calories from the poor portion control, made me hold water and I just plain gained weight. Just understanding this, gives me back some semblance of control. I also was lax on tracking my food intake after lunch. This shouldn't be terribly difficult to correct. I just need to take the time to log my food and hold myself more accountable. I'm not beating myself up over it because these things happen. I just need to try to control what I can and I know that I'll be okay. When you feel like you're losing control, gaining some back is vitally important. It is clear to me what I need to do. What a relief! I know that I can do this. All I need to do is make some adjustments and I'll be back on track and on my way to being successful!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PEGGYANNSCH 10/27/2009 7:43PM

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WOLFSPIRITS 10/26/2009 6:14PM

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LADYIRISH317 10/25/2009 12:08PM

    You're terrific! I'd love to have your attitude. Keep doing what you're doing.

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IUHRYTR 10/25/2009 11:21AM

    With your great attitude there is no doubt you will be successful. Hang in there. -- Lou

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I took care of myself last night

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

You know those times where you put yourself in an impossible situation? Well, last night I refused to let myself be drawn into one of those situations. The old me would have been sucked right into a set of circumstances that would have be detrimental both emotionally as well as physically. The me who is now on a journey to health, stepped back from the whole scene and decided that it was a very bad idea to enter into the situation. That's what I call major progress! The act of taking care of myself mentally and physically is something I've been working on diligently for over a year. Since I have been the family whipping post for most of my life, refusing to even entertain thoughts of continuing the pattern both in the family and outside the family (yes it does set a pattern for all areas of your life) is a very big deal. My efforts to break life-long patterns such as this, flow into all aspects of my life from my exercise and eating habits to my self esteem and coping mechanisms as I work with stressful issues. Last night was exhibit A for my progress. I took myself out of a potentially explosive situation, involving physical and verbal abuse, by refusing to enter into it at all. That is called taking care of myself. I am worth protecting. I don't need to be beaten up by others. I am learning to protect myself. I can protect myself. I deserve to be treated with respect. I am worth loving. Let it begin with how I treat me.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VICIOUS421 10/18/2009 11:05PM

    Protect yourself at all costs even if it means saying goodbye to someone you love. No one deserves to be verbally or physically abused. I have been there and done that and it is just not worth being with someone if they are going to do that to you no matter how much you love them.


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WOLFSPIRITS 10/18/2009 5:30PM

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PEGGYANNSCH 10/18/2009 8:10AM

    Go Girl

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KIRSTEN 10/16/2009 1:27AM

    Way to go, doesn't it feel good to be in control instead of like a pile of you-know-what? emoticon emoticon emoticon

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XHASTEDMOMOF2 10/14/2009 9:45PM

    You said it honey!!! I love your blog and the power you have given yourself!!! A life lesson for you and one for all of us to take with us!! Thanks!!!

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WOLFSPIRITS 10/14/2009 9:10PM

    BEEN THERE!!! ALOT IN MY PAST. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FITKAT2010 10/14/2009 8:58PM

    You go girl! Yes,protect yourself.

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Mixed Feelings Today

Sunday, October 11, 2009

My mother died 24 years ago today. I have very mixed feelings where she was concerned and am currently trying to make sense of it. She was very smart and educated for a women of her generation but I don't think the members of her family treated her very well when she was growing up. Consequently, she grew up a confused, very needy woman who had difficulty getting her own needs met, let alone meeting the needs of her children. As I work my way through my issues with her, I have discovered that I spent a big chunk of my childhood fending for myself physically and emotionally. There were many periods in my life during which I took care of her as well as myself. That wasn't one of the most healthy periods of my life. Yes, I ended up being the family caretaker and official person to dump on and in some ways, I still am. I'm working on fixing that, which has made my siblings miffed when I give them boundaries. Since joining Spark People, I've dedicated myself to learning to protect myself from people who try to use me and hurt me. So as I think of my mother today, my feelings are mixed. I miss the occasional good times that we had together and those wonderful Christmases when she put such magic into the day. There are times when I wish I could call her and ask her questions about my past. There are still many things I don't understand about my past. Then there is the relief that her death brought because taking care of her for 5 years was so exhausting. She, my small daughter and my job totally took up 100% of my time for 5 years. During this period, I learned to put myself last. I'm sure that some of you can relate to this. It was years before I took any time just for myself. It took years beyond that before I took "me" time on a regular basis. Spark People has taught me to take me time every day. Some days I do this naturally and other days I have to force myself because old habits die hard. So here's a toast to you Mom - to both the good times and the bad. I know that you'd be proud of the progress I'm making and I'd like you to know that I'm proud of myself too!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLAGIRL32 10/12/2009 8:25PM

    Cyndi,

I understand your conflicts with your mom, lord knows, for most of us girls, it's a lifelong process of both wanting to emulate, and wanting to be absolutely nothing like our moms. In your case it sounds like you learned from her sense of fun, while learning early to provide your own strength.

You had to be so strong for others, and now it's your turn to be strong for you! If anyone has earned me time, it's you, and I am so happy that you are learning to take it. Having me time is like a girl scout badge, you earned it and should wear it proudly!

Dawn

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PEGGYANNSCH 10/12/2009 8:17AM

    I Understand About My Dad.Sometimes You Wish You Just Pick Up The Phone Make That Phone Call.I Lucky My Mom Is Still With Us.When The Lord Call Her Home Than I Will Have To Let Her Go.But You Never Know When He Will Call Us Home.We Just Keep Them As Long As We Can.

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TBRANCH2 10/12/2009 4:32AM

    As you said, now it is "me" time! Take care of yourself and know that while Mom was here, you did your best where she was concerned. Now, it is time to let her "rest in peace", remember the good times, and look toward the future....YOUR future!! She is where she now knows everything in it's fullness and yes, she is proud of you. She knows what you forfeited for her. Go forth and continue to be proud of yourself! If you "miff" people, whether it be family or not, that is THEIR wagon, not yours! Your tethers have been broken, rotted through time, and now, you are free! Your "retirement" time is here! ENJOY!! You have indeed earned it!! Take it with the pride of knowing that you served your time and served it well!! There is no guilt to be had for those who "served" and served the best that they could! To YOU, I toast...HAPPY RETIREMENT, CYNDI!!!!! emoticon

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KSMITH1974 10/11/2009 9:47PM

  i understand it totally for the past 4 years i have taking care of my grandmother day in and out. She just recently past away and i now realize how much time that it took away from me.

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I made good choices last night

Thursday, October 08, 2009

I'm pleased with the choices that I made at last night's team dinner. I ate lots of salad and I chopped up some beets instead of using salad dressing. I did eat some pulled pork (with BBQ sauce of course) and a piece of garlic bread. Yummy! Hubby and I really enjoyed the company of the other members. He intends to continue going along with me whenever he can. It was great to see members who I hadn't seen for a while. I love getting back that connection again.

Next month we'll be meeting on Thursday, November 5 at 7p.m. One member is going to research a new place to eat and get back to us with the information. I drove past the place today and did a little investigating myself. The place has a web site with information. It is set up like a bistro and only has about 15 tables. They make everything from scratch so the food takes a while to arrive at the table but from what I've heard, it's well worth the wait! I'm thinking about stopping there for lunch in the next few days to try some of their dishes. I'll let everyone know how it is.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BABYFACE26 10/11/2009 2:53PM

    Congratulations, well done! Feels good, doesn't it? Eating out is the most challenging situation for me, oh yes - and Parties. I also wanted to thank u for stopping by to support me on my blog. Lets hear it for both of us!

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PEGGYANNSCH 10/9/2009 12:54PM

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COMEONMA 10/9/2009 10:24AM

    It's always a challenge to stay on track when you are out in public, especially with a group of people.
Congrats on a job well done!

the new place sounds wonderful too. Enjoy!!
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WOLFSPIRITS 10/8/2009 7:52PM

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